"One thing I never doubted," J'onn said. Sam stood by the door, already dressed and ready to go. He continued, "is that Jeremiah loved his daughters."
Sam rolled her eyes. His words stabbing deep into her chest. She ignored it, pretended they meant nothing.
"That's what Eliza said to me this morning," Kara replied.
With a loud clearing of her throat, Sam got them to look at her. "Can we go?"
J'onn gave her a smile and squeeze of the shoulder as he walked by. Kara linked her arm with Sam's once she locked the apartment. They had one more stop to make before heading for Midvale. Sam braced herself on the drive over. It wasn't going to be pretty.
Alex's door opened, revealing a woman that Sam assumed was Kelly. The woman gave a slow sigh, and reached for Kara as she said," Kara. I'm so sorry."
"Thanks Kelly," Kara said. She returned the hug. "I'm so glad Alex has you."
Sam had to swallow a scoff that turned into a cough as she choked on it. It caused all three of them to turn to her. Kelly gave her a smile that Sam just managed to return.
Last night, as she laid on the couch and watched the lights of late-night National City reflect on Kara's ceiling, Sam decided to give Kelly a try. Alex obviously felt strongly about her. It was only fair.
It seemed the morning did not hold the same clarity. Sam was having a hard enough time keeping her boiling, blending emotions down enough to be calm and steady for her family. Now this outsider was in her midst and encroaching on Sam's familiarity of home.
"You must be Sam," Kelly said. She took a step forward as if to embrace Sam, but Sam went stiff. Kelly registered and stopped herself. "Nice to finally meet you."
"Yea, same," Sam said.
Kara gave Sam a look before turning back to Kelly. "So, where is she? Are you guys ready?"
Kelly turned with a defeated sigh as Alex walked into the kitchen. "I'm not going," she announced in a flat voice. She grabbed a glass of wine that had Sam's eyebrows raising as she checked her watch. A tad early even in Sam's book. "And you can spare me the big accusing eyes, Kara. I've made up my mind."
With a shocked chuckle, Kara stepped into the apartment. "Um, Alex. I don't understand. You were with me last night when we finished the arrangements."
"I never said that I was participating."
Kara shook her head, confused and a little upset. "I-I know your in pain but –"
"I'm not in pain," Alex spit back.
"Of course you're in pain," Kara responded. Sam stepped around Kelly and into the room. Alex's eyes drifted to her then back to Kara. Sam tried not to let it bother her that she was not getting so much as a hello.
"Stop telling me how I feel."
"Okay, then you tell me how you feel," Kara replied.
Kelly and J'onn shared a look that made Sam roll her eyes. She stepped further into the room, hoping to either diffuse the situation or add buoyancy to Kara's argument.
Kara moved forward too though, gaining steam. "Tell me why you're refusing to go to your father's funeral."
"Because I don't feel the need to bury a man who has been dead to me for years," Alex said back in a scathing tone.
This made Sam laugh. All eyes went to her. Kara's were pleading, not here and now. Sam shook her off. Kara tried to talk over Sam's opportunity.
"Jeremiah was changing his ways," she said, glancing at Sam and still pleading with her to not start. "He was helping people, making amends."
"Well not to me." Alex threw her arms out to drop.
"This sounds real familiar," Sam said. Finding her opportunity.
"Sam," Kara said slowly.
"No. No, let her go. What, Sam?" Alex spit.
"Do you not remember when he came back? What you said to me? This," Sam gestured to Alex, "is how I felt. You told me to get over it, but now that he's dead it's all fine and good? Come on, Alex. Get off your high horse. You loved our father and missing his funeral is going to wreck you."
"Seriously, Sam? This is not going to help anything," Kara whined.
Alex took the bait though. "You don't know how I feel either. He should have come home! To us! We're his family!"
"He had to live in secrecy for his safety!" Kara blurted out, frustrated with them both.
"Right," Alex dismissed.
"After Cadmus, did you think he was just gonna be able to call us whenever he felt like?" Kara asked.
"He could have tried," Sam said, earning a glare from Kara.
"I am the one," Alex was now face to face with Kara, "Who held out hope for him. I am the one that said that he was good, and that Cadmus was forcing him to kill people. To hurt Sam."
"And he helped you escape," Kara said, a quiet determination in her voice.
"And then he disappeared. Again." Alex almost shouted. "Just like that!"
This was not an Alex that showed very often. Only when she was hurt. It was unsurprising but still worrying.
"He left all of us, Alex," Sam said. "Not once. Not even twice."
Kara took over from there. She said, "He's still your father."
Alex turned away from them with a heavy sigh. This wasn't going to go their way. The stubbornness in Alex's eyes was rock solid. Maybe Sam shouldn't have snapped at her. She just couldn't help it. Alex was being hypocritical.
"You should be at his burial," Kara said. A low blow.
"Look, the man that I loved hasn't been a father to me in years." Tears flooded Alex's eyes but not one fell. It broke Sam's heart to see her big sister so broken. A broken that Sam understood and felt herself.
"And…and, yes. Yes, we were so close," Alex continued. Her voice breaking and taking Sam's heart with it. Kara's too by her sister's expression. "That we could just…we could finish each other's sentences. But his obsession with keeping you safe changed all of it."
The words, and the hurt, smacked both Sam and Kara. Kara physically recoiling from them with a blink. These words were something she never thought Alex would say.
"Nothing else mattered to him, the least of all me."
"That is not true!" Kara replied, her voice full of emotion and her eyes gathering her own tears.
"Come on, Kara," Alex scoffed.
Sam couldn't sit by and listen. Her eyes narrowed. "No, Alex. You come on. Are you kidding me? Years we fought round and round over this. You preached dad's words. You never let me forget them. You're standing here all holier than thou as always, but these words are hitting a little too close to home for me. After all these years, finally we agree but god damn it, I am not letting you do this. Not today."
"Sam," Kara said. A clear rebuke but Sam shook it off.
"No, Kara. I've been lectured and excluded for feeling this way. I can't do it. This is ridiculous."
"But this isn't the time." Kara turned back to Alex. "We can talk about this after. He wasn't perfect, we all know that. But still, Alex, he's your father. He loved you."
Alex scoffed, on a roll. "No, Kara. He treated you like you were some golden girl, and of course you have love for him, and I totally respect that. But he treated me like I wasn't even worth his time."
All three sisters fell quiet. Anger swirling in Sam. Sadness plastered on Kara's face, tears threatening to fall. And utter heartbreak showing through Alex's cracks.
"Okay," Kara finally said. She didn't look at Alex. "What do you want me to tell Eliza?"
Alex gave a shake of her head, a rueful smile on her face but lacking any touch of amusement. "I don't care," she said as she turned away.
"You don't care?" Kara scoffed, bitter and cooling into anger. "You don't care what I tell our grieving mother?"
"Alex, seriously?" Sam asked, shocked and disappointed. It was almost like she was back to College Alex. The one who drank, got in trouble, and cared only for herself.
Kara's question got Alex to spin back, hands coming up in big angry gestures. "I have spent my entire life protecting this whole family," her voice final reached a shout, "and I will not do it again."
She slammed the bathroom door behind her. Sam watched a rare moment as Kara put her hands up and turned to the door. "She's all yours, Kelly. I'm not dealing with this."
Sam approached the bathroom. Alex wouldn't listen to her. Nothing so far has even been worth listening to if Sam was being honest. She had let her emotions get the best of her. But there was something she had to say.
She knocked on the door but didn't wait for an answer. Alex wouldn't and it didn't matter. She'd hear Sam whether she wanted to or not. There was nowhere to hide trapped in that bathroom.
In the background Kelly was saying something about grieving and that Alex was reeling. Sam didn't care. This was a hell of a time for Alex to crumble.
"This is the one thing that tore us apart," she said to the closed door. "I wanted to hate him. You wanted to love him. This was it, Alex, and now you're on the same side as me? What the hell was all the fighting for then? Kara didn't deserve that. Mom doesn't deserve it either. Hiding only makes it worse. Trust me on that."
"Sam," J'onn called out. She glared at the door before turning. Kelly was giving her a none too pleased look that Sam returned. "Let's go. Kelly will handle it from here." He gave Kelly a nod, "Call me if you need anything."
She thanked him and shut the door behind them. Sam was fuming. It seemed the only thing she could really feel was anger. And it was a hell of a lot easier to be angry at Alex than it was at her dead dad.
"Now is not the time, Sam," J'onn said as they headed out of the building. "She needs an ally, not an enemy."
"We've done this song and dance. So many times. Our dad has disappeared so many times. We've mourned him more times than I even care to. This is nothing new! He's dead!" Sam shouted. A door opened and closed behind them. Sam paid it no mind. "He's never even been around for that to matter! Alex needs to get over herself. This is nothing new," Sam repeated.
Kelly approached them. She looked at Sam with sad eyes that Sam really didn't care about. With a sigh she said, "You sound just like her. She asked for space after saying almost exactly what you said."
"So much for talking to her, huh?" Sam snapped and walked off.
J'onn gave a sad, "Sorry Kelly. It's obviously not a good time for the Danvers right now."
"It's fine. Go on. I'll try again with Alex later. Good luck with those two," Kelly responded.
Sam jammed the elevator button harder. She hated that they were talking about them like handlers. Sam also hated that her emotions were getting the better of her. But not about her dad. It was Alex she was angry with. How could she be so cold about this? These were arguments that she and Sam had for years. It was mind-blowingly frustrating to be in Sam's shoes.
Her and J'onn took the elevator down in silence. Once J'onn tried to placate Sam but she glared him into silence. Outside, Kara waited for them with her arms crossed tight and foot almost tapping a whole in the concrete.
"Let's go. Now," she said. Sam was happy to follow. J'onn tried again to talk them down but Kara spun on her heel. "J'onn, I love you but save it. My father, my second father, just died and my sister is being a stubborn jerk about it. I have a right to be angry."