They drove in silence. The rumble of the tires and the winding roads soothed some of the fight out of Sam. Her eyes slipped shut and when she opened them, they were home. She got up, eyes moving slowly over her childhood home. It was twinged with more pain than usual as she looked at it, trying not to picture the few memories she had with her father in their yard.

Their mother slipped out of the front door with a smile and a wave. Her shoulders looked slighter than normal. Her smile covered in sadness. Sam felt tears push at her eyes. The thought of her mother's burden crashing into Sam. A strong urge to call Lucy coming over her at the same time.

"Hey mom," Sam said, wrapping her mom in a hug after Kara let go.

"Oh, Samantha," her mom said squeezing Sam tight. "It is so good to see you, dear."

"Same. It's been a while." Sam let go but her mom took hold of her hand. Sam let it. They walked into the house. Everything was the same.

"Are you hungry?"

Sam shook her head no as Kara nodded a yes. It made Sam smile. "You guys go ahead. I'm going to call Lucy real quick."

"Tell her hi for us, dear. I'll make extra for you in case you change your mind," her mom said with a smile.

Back in Sam's childhood room, she closed the door and leaned back against it with her eyes closed. It was too much. The numbness was waning in a way that Sam didn't want. She thought it was weakness but really, it was strength. How was she supposed to support her family in the middle of a breakdown of loss and mourning? All over a man who she barely remembered and what she did remember most recently was less than pleasant.

"Hey baby."

Sam smiled at the sound of Lucy's voice. She moved to sit on her bed as she said, "Hey. How's your day?"

"Fine. Is everything okay? I didn't expect to hear from you until alter."

"Yea, I guess." Sam paused. Just enough for Lucy to fill it as she knew, and maybe hoped, she would.

"But?"

"Kara and I got into a fight with Alex this morning. She's not coming to the funeral."

"What? Why?"

Sam scoffed. "For all the reasons I shouldn't want to. It was wild, Lucy. Like she took everything I ever said about my dad and Kara, and she just…spat it back at us."

"She's hurting, Sam. Don't be too hard on her."

"Everyone is hurting. She doesn't have a monopoly on it. I mean, the way she spoke to Kara. Seriously. It was like a mirror, Lucy. And I do understand that she's hurting but she was the one who always told me I couldn't talk to anyone the way she was talking to us."

"She'll come around, babe. Just give her time. You being there will help. Even if things aren't going great, I'm sure everyone is happy to see you."

That gave Sam a smile. "You're right actually. My mom, Kara, and J'onn all say hi." With a sigh, Sam did her best to let go of her warring emotions. "I miss you."

"I can still catch a flight if you want. I would miss the funeral, but I could be there by tonight."

"No, it's okay. I'm just being a baby about everything. Thanks though," Sam said. "I'll be home tomorrow anyway. It would be a hassle for you to come out here just to turn back around."

"I'd do it for you though."

"Yea, I know. Thank you."

"Call me if you need anything. I'll keep my phone on me. Even if it's just to say hi or breath through some of the tension I'm sure you'll be feeling."

"Yea, okay. Thanks, Luce. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye."

With nothing left to do, Sam went back out. Kara was more than half way through a plate sized sandwich. A bag of chips open in front of her. J'onn sat at the table with a pop in hand. Another plate with a more moderately sized sandwich sat untouched. Her mother gestured Sam to it.

"I made your favorite. Salami and pepperoni," her mom said with a smile. Sam returned it and sat at the table. She picked at the sandwich. Not hungry but not wanting to be rude.

"So Sam," J'onn began. "How's work going?"

"God. I actually wanted to talk to you about it. We've been getting some shaky intel lately. Anything you can do?"

"Shaky how?" J'onn asked. His arms crossed over his chest as he leaned back.

"Just vague. You know, little detail on who we're looking for. It isn't a huge deal but makes things a little harder," Sam explained.

"Hm. True enough. I'll look into it but my contacts are sparse now that I am not in the DEO. Have you talked to Lean about it?"

"Wait, what?" Kara asked with her mouth full. "Lena? Why would you need to talk to Lena?"

Sam sighed. She hoped to have this conversation on her terms. Not being outed by J'onn. He gave her a grimace of an apology.

"Yea, Kara. I've been meaning to tell you. I just…I didn't want you to feel weird since things have been tense with you guys," Sam explained. Kara continued to chew, silently waiting. "Lena, uh…she is one of my boss's. L Corp funds Project Perdita Spe."

Silence followed. J'onn excused himself from the table and led their mom into the living room, giving them some privacy. Sam tried to hold the stare Kara had leveled at her but it was hard.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Sam shrugged. "I just said. I thought you might feel weird since you two aren't exactly friends right now."

"We're friends! Kind of. I mean, I'm still Lena's friend. I hope she's still mine even though we're not really talking. How long has she been your– your boss?"

"Since the start. Her and another donor. A Cuban guy who has a vested interest in the Caribbean and the safety of immigrants. I meet virtually with Lena at least once a month," Sam explained.

"Oh. Well, that's cool," Kara said. Then added, "I guess."

"Yea," Sam replied. Letting the tense quiet come over them.

Once her sandwich was done, Kara said, "Your work is a good thing, Sam. If part of that is working with Lena, then I'm glad. She's a good person and so are you."

"Thanks Kara."

The rest of the afternoon was spent sitting around, waiting for the funeral. Sam did her best to cater to her mom and sister. It wasn't her natural instinct though and most of the time she found herself awkwardly hovering. Kara and her mom only gave her warm smiles and appreciative looks as she tried her best. Sam sent strings of texts to Lucy that all received supportive replies. An anchor in the unknown void Sam was tossing herself into.

Finally, Kara's phone rang. She stared at it then blurted, "It's Alex."

"Answer it, dear. The last thing you need is for her to take your not picking up as a sign she shouldn't come," their mother said.

"Hello?" Kara said, phone to her ear. The conversation wasn't long. Enough though that by the end Kara was smiling. When she hung up, she announced, "Alex and Kelly are on their way."

Great, Sam thought. She wished it was just Alex. Kelly would only be a further barrier and one that irked Sam. She couldn't help it. Not to mention, Alex and Sam, yet again, had a fight unfinished. Sam hoped it wouldn't end as a fight but rather a conversation. She wasn't holding her breath though.

By the time Alex and Kelly arrived, the service already started. Their mother talking about what a great man Jeremiah was. The things that were real. Sam sat rigid and angry. Not believing a word. Kelly slid into the pew behind them next to J'onn. Alex walked around to sit on the other side of Kara.

"Sorry for all the things that I said," Alex said with a sniffle.

"It doesn't matter," Kara answered, wrapping an arm around Alex's shoulders. She looked at Sam briefly. "You're here now."

Sam said nothing. Kara leaned her head against Alex's as she took hold of Sam's hand. Sam gripped it back just as tightly. Their mother talked for a few more minutes and then everyone bowed their head for a last prayer.

As the rest of the church stood and filed into a line to pass by their father's casket for a final goodbye, Sam walked out of the church. She stood in the cold Midvale air as a forced puff of air escaped her. Her solitude did not last long. Kelly came to stand next to her.

"I think we might have gotten off on the wrong foot this morning," Kelly said. Sam didn't respond. "Okay, maybe we still are. Can I ask you something?"

"If I said no would it stop you?" Kelly smiled and shook her head. "Then please, be my guest."

"Why don't you like me?"

Sam scoffed. "I don't know you enough to have any kind of opinions on you."

"We both know that's not true. You talk to Alex every Sunday just like you do Kara. Or maybe my relationship is not as stable as I thought and Alex never brings me up," Kelly said.

This was a crossroads. Sam had a decision to make. Hurt Kelly, and thus Alex, by saying she didn't or admit that Sam didn't care to hear about Kelly, so Alex stopped bringing her up weeks ago.

She was saved by answering as Alex and Kara joined them. Alex gave them a worried look. Because Kelly was talking to Sam or because of the fight left unresolved, Sam wasn't sure. She looked away in reply to her sister's greeting.

Alex slid her arm around Kelly's waste and huddled close as a cold wind blew through. Kara had her hands jammed deep in the pockets of her trench coat. The cold was a shocking contrast to Miami, but Sam ignored it, showing no reaction to it. Her jacket flapping around the black long sleeve she wore.

"Sam," Alex said. "Can I talk to you?"

She didn't answer. Just looked at Alex. After a beat, Alex nodded in the direction she walked in. Kara and Kelly stepped together against the cold.

Kara called out, "We're gonna head back to the house. Eliza needs help prepping for guests. Will you guys be okay?"

Alex tuned to nod. Sam didn't answer. She had come back to California to support her sisters, but she was so angry with Alex. Just like she used to be. Alex's words that morning hurt Sam. It was like she never mattered, her pain never mattered. It was just something Alex could brush off until she claimed it as her own.

"I'll talk to Kara when we get home. I know she'll play nice until then. You, though, I figured I needed to apologize to sooner rather than later. The last thing mom needs is a yelling match."

"So you'd rather do it in the front yard of a church," Sam drawled, feeling the familiar but now almost foreign tingle of anger gathering like needles in her hands and chest.

"I'm hoping to avoid it actually," Alex said. Sam could see her raising to the bait. A few more comments like her last and she could get Alex to bite. "Listen, I'm sorry about this morning. I just… Coping is not something I'm great at. My whole life I dedicated to dad's last command. You know that more than anyone. Without having him around, I felt like I was without a tether. No DEO. Just me."

"That's not my problem, Alex, and frankly, you can go to hell."

"Excuse me?" Alex bit out.

"You heard me perfectly fine." Sam scoffed, "I mean did you hear yourself this morning? Were you keeping notes all those years? It was like every word I ever said about dad or Kara you just puked back at me."

"No, I didn't –"

Sam cut her off. "You did. And you know what? All that did was make me feel invisible. You think dad didn't care about you? At least he gave you something to hang on to you. Not to mention you actually remember the guy."

Her control was slipping. The numb haze was gone. Sam's anger, her rage was exploding. A burst of energy surged through her. It was almost a relief. Like an old friend pulling her into an embrace.

"He left you with a mission, Alex. A purpose! You know what he left me with? Inadequacy and fucking daddy issues. A little less fun, huh?"

"You're right, Sam. He abandoned us. He never reached out, even when he got out. He didn't care enough to even send a letter or call. But don't you dare take this anger out on me. I shouldn't have done it this morning, but you are not angry at me."

Alex paused. Sam was sure no matter what she said next would have a physical end. She could feel her hands curled into fists and buzzing at disuse. Sam's eyes slipped shut. She heard Lucy's voice. This was not the answer, but it was all she could grasp in the moment.

"You're angry at him. You're angry at yourself because you weren't enough. None of us were, Sam!" Alex yelled. "Not me, not you, not even Kara or mom. He left all of us and we clung to hope but it's gone. He is gone. Forever."

Sam deflated.

"When will it go away?" She asked. Defeat smothering the angry fire in her. Tears final came. Sam gave a shuddering sniff to keep them away. Alex looked at her with kind, sad eyes.

"I don't know. Maybe never."

"Fucking great," Sam gave a watery laugh. She rubbed at her eyes. "I'm sick of this Alex. I don't want to care about him anymore. He left us. He hurt us and then left again. Our father," Sam spit the word, "didn't even care enough to see us when he got free. Did he ever even care?"

Alex shrugged. "I don't know, Sam. I wish I did. It would make all of this a lot easier to deal with but you know life doesn't always give us the closure we need."

When Sam said nothing, Alex took her by the arm. They walked back to the car and headed home. Sam called Lucy and cried into the phone. The dam finally broken. Then Sam skulked in the corner as people who knew her father far better than she ever did gave their condolences and told stories about him that made Sam sneer.

At the end of the night, with the guests gone, Kara and Alex asleep in their rooms, Sam's mother sought her out, finding her out on the back deck. Her mother's eyes were sad in a way they hadn't been all day.

"Samantha, I know he wasn't who you wanted him to be," her mother said. "Nothing turned out exactly how I wanted either, but you should know, he loved you girls so much. So very much. You were his world."

"It's not enough. Love isn't enough," Sam said. Her tone was flat. The cold air accented her words with a stream of hazy fog. "I don't care how much he might have loved me. Time after time, he never picked me. Never, mom. I honestly do not give a fuck if he loved me. That love wasn't enough for him to stay so it certainly isn't enough for me to mourn him or think well of him in death. He doesn't deserve it."

Her mom didn't try to say anything else. She rubbed Sam's back before heading back into the house, leaving Sam on her own. Sam watched the sky. Anger still consuming her. Kara had already forgiven him. Her mother never held it against him. Soon, Alex would forgive him to if only because he was dead. Sam didn't think she could. He had set her on so many different paths each time he chose something over her. Sam just wanted to be done. She wanted to go home, fall asleep in bed with Lucy and go about her life, never think about Jeremiah Danvers again.

It wouldn't be so easy. Sam was determined to try though. He'd taken up enough of her life.

Cold settled heavy in her fingers and toes. It forced Sam inside. She wasn't the only one still up. Alex and Kara were at the table. A tub of ice cream between them. A clean spoon waiting for her. Sam smiled and sat silently.

"No matter what," Kara said, "we have this. Ice cream and each other."

"I've never met a better combo," Alex said.

Sam rolled her eyes but couldn't deny the bloom of happiness in her chest. A steep contrast to the rest of the day. She looked at each of her sisters in turn as they playfully fought over the tub. Alex with a tired smile and Kara with hopeful eyes. Maybe a difference of opinion really didn't matter. This chapter was closed but that didn't mean anything for them. The Danvers sisters wouldn't be torn asunder by it. Alex, Kara, and Sam would be just fine.