A/N: OMFG we are so close to finally finding out what happened to Jay in the Rangers! I cannot begin to explain how excited I have been for this moment. Ok, here are my predictions:

1. He killed a teammate, either by friendly fire or he did it as a mercy killing

2. He was grabbed by someone and captured for a bit

3. After the humvees were hit by IED, someone else got captured and Jay tortured someone to save their life.

Ok, those are my predictions, let's see if I am right!

Chapter 5

Clay wasn't sure what time it was when he woke up, but he instantly noticed that it was still dark outside and he wasn't alone in bed. Clay opened his eyes, expecting to see Jason next to him, but instead it was Jay. He was sleeping with Cerberus between them. Clay took a quick glance at Jay's watch and he saw that it was five in the morning. He knew that Jay would be up within the hour, he was always up at six to start his work out for the day. Jay liked routine, it made him feel better and it was easier for him to handle his PTSD. Clay moved his hand and placed it on Cerb's head and started to pet him. He felt a bit better now that he had been able to get some serious sleep. He had slept well over fifteen hours and it had helped a great deal. He didn't feel so rundown now. The whole bed smelt like Jay and Clay found comfort in that.

Jay took a deep breath in and began to wake up. Clay had a feeling it was because he felt someone looking at him. Jay's senses were always strong and nine out of ten times he knew when someone was watching. Jay's eyes blinked open and he saw that Clay was finally awake. He gave him a small warm smile before he spoke.

"You're awake. How are ya feeling?"

"Not bad. I haven't gotten that much sleep in months. Didn't expect to see you here." Clay said with a small smirk.

"I came by after work to see you, but you were still sleeping. I had burgers and beer with Jason before I crashed."

"You and my dad actually manage to have a conversation alone together without killing each other?" Clay said, completely surprised.

"We had some rightful tension, but we worked it out. At least mostly. He seems like a good man. He clearly loves you and wants you to be happy and healthy. That's good enough for me."

It meant a lot to Clay to hear that Jay and Jason were starting to get along with each other. He loved them both more than anyone else in the world and he wanted them to be ok with each other. He needed them to be ok with each other.

"I can't tell you how much it means to me that you are trying to be friendly with him. He really didn't do anything wrong Jay. He doesn't even know everything, but he tried to prevent me from being transferred."

"You never told me what happened to get you transferred off."

Jay wasn't certain how Clay would handle talking about it. He knew from himself that he didn't like talking about things that happened to him overseas. He knew it was hard to discuss what triggers your PTSD and the very last thing he wanted was to put Clay in that position. At the same time though, he couldn't help if he didn't know some of what happened to him. He had been transferred off of Bravo and placed on Echo for a reason, but Clay had never specified what that was. He just said there had been some tension within the team and the Upper Brass pulled rank on them. With Clay being the lowest ranking man, he was the first one to go.

"I don't even know what happened to be honest. One day we're all family. We're all brothers and everything is fine. And then literally the very next day Ray and Sonny hated me. I don't know why. I've asked, I've begged them to tell me what it was that I did, but they never said. Trent, Brock and Jason have asked what happened, but it just caused this divide within the team. We were still operating and being successful on our missions, but everyone could feel the tension. We were going to snap and the Upper Brass knew what could happen to a team if we snapped in the middle of an operation. I don't blame them for transferring me. It was the only logical thing to do. The only way they could prevent an entire team being taken out by their own hostility."

"I can understand the Upper Brass' point. It's not safe if the entire team can't get along. Too much is on the line. We've had rookies when I was in the Rangers that had to be transferred to another unit because the personalities just didn't mesh. It happens all the time, but not normally after a couple of years, or almost two years. You have no idea why they would do this? Why they wouldn't say what it was?" That was what confused Jay. if Clay did something or said something wrong, then why not tell him? Why not call him out on it? Instead they treated him like crap for two months like a bunch of little bitches instead of being men and opening their fucking mouths.

"They won't talk about it. I Don't get it. Jason literally ordered them to and they both refused. They think I have him completely fooled and he won't believe what they tell him. They just say they are protecting the team and I deserve what I get. After I got transferred they were placed on tour to cover a team that had gotten injured. They were gone for two months. I heard from Jason, Brock and Trent, but not from Ray or Sonny. They would ask how I was doing, but I just told them I was fine. I didn't want them to worry about me. They were out on tour, they didn't need to know what I was going through. I wasn't going to risk having them killed."

"And I can understand that Clay, really I do. But what I don't understand is why you haven't told me about anything that had been going on these past few months. You know I would never judge you. I would have been able to help you through some of it. I could have come down to see you if I knew you were struggling like this."

That was what bothered Jay the most about this. He could understand why Clay didn't want his friends in Bravo to know. They were at war, they didn't need to be worried about what was going on back home. They had to keep their head in the game. He got that, he really did. But what he didn't get was Clay not telling him. He was in Chicago, yes the streets were dangerous and he had the scars and medical file to prove it, but he wasn't constantly at risk of being blown up or attacked at any moment in the day. He would have been there for him. He would have gone down to visit him and make sure he was doing ok. He could have gotten him to take some vacation time to try and prevent his current situation and health condition. There were so many things he could have done to help Clay, but he couldn't do any of it because he didn't know it was going on.

"I know, I just didn't want you to see me like this. You are so strong Jay. You've survived worse shit than me and you're still functioning. Fuck Jay, you were captured and tortured. I didn't go through any of that, so what right do I have for being a mess right now?" Clay said and Jay could hear the self-hatred within his voice.

"I'm glad you didn't get tortured. I'm glad that you haven't been captured and hurt that way. But that doesn't mean what you have gone through isn't traumatic. Everyone has their own traumas. Everyone has their own limit. Some people get PTSD from being shot, some get it from being tortured and others get it from watching the horrors that this world has to offer being played out in front of them. There's no more reason to it than that. This isn't a contest Clay. Because I survived being tortured that doesn't mean that you have to survive it too before your trauma can be justified. You have your own trauma and that has turned into PTSD. Just like my traumas did, but it's ok."

Jay was never going to say that Clay didn't deserve to have PTSD because he didn't experience what he had. That wasn't how PTSD worked. There were plenty of soldiers that had lost their limbs and didn't get PTSD and Jay at times felt like he was weak because he was suffering from it when others that were worse off weren't. There wasn't a set guidebook that stipulated who could have it and who couldn't. It was all about how your mind reacted to the traumas, it was just that simple.

"I don't know what to do." Clay softly admitted and Jay could hear how confused he was.

"You don't have to do anything right now. You have six months off for medical leave, I think you should take it. Stay here with me. You don't have to go back until you want to. Hell, you don't have to go back at all. Take the time off and stay here with me."

Jay wasn't sure how Clay would feel about it. He knew he would want to go back to Virginia Beach like he was supposed to. The problem was, he had been doing what he felt like he was supposed to this whole time and it was only making him worse. He needed to get away from the triggers. He needed to get away from Bravo for a bit. He needed this time to heal away from them. To give himself time to think and figure out what he wanted to do with his life. He needed that now more than ever.

Clay didn't know what he wanted to do. Everything in his mind was screaming at him to go back to Virginia Beach. To go back to work and be a good sailor. A good Tier One Operator. He knew what he was supposed to do. At the same time though, all Clay wanted to do was hide under the covers and never leave Jay's bed. To run away and never look back. He didn't know what to do, what the right decision or move was.

"I don't know what to do." Clay said, sounding completely broken.

"Don't think. Completely forget about Bravo, Echo, Tier One, everything. Don't think about any of it. Don't even think about me and Will. Just listen to your heart, what do you want to do? If you could do anything, what would it be?" Jay asked, with all the patience in the world.

Clay curled up more against Cerb before he spoke. "I want to hide in your bed until it doesn't hurt so bad." Clay answered with tears building in his eyes.

Jay reached over and placed his hand within Clay's as he spoke. "Then that's what you need to do, and that's ok Kiddo. You can't live for other people and you can't worry about what other people will think or what they want you to do. You have to do whatever is best for yourself. And if that is hiding out in my bed, then that is what you need to do. And I won't let anyone bully you into doing something different.

"But Jason." Clay started, but Jay cut him off.

"If he is half the father that you said he was, then he will understand and support your decision one hundred percent. He just wants you to be healthy and happy, just like every good father does. He'll accept and be ok if you want to stay here with me and Will. You'll be with family and a doctor, it's not like you are telling him you want to go backpacking in antarctica. He'll be ok."

Jay didn't know how well Jason would handle the news internally. But he knew he would tell Clay it was ok and make it appear as if he was ok with it. Jason was a good man, and Jay could tell he loved Clay like a son and just wanted the best for him. He would support this decision, even if it killed him inside.

"Ok, not forever, just a little bit."

Jay was fine with that. He knew that talking about Clay not going back to the Navy was not a conversation they needed to have right now. That would come later on. For now, Clay needed some time to adjust to having PTSD and getting healthy again. Jay would go with the flow and go at Clay's own pace. Eventually they would have to talk about it, but that didn't have to be right now. Clay had already made progress by agreeing to staying longer than a week and that was more than good enough. They would face whatever came their way together and Jay would be there for Clay through it all.