Chapter 6 (Sorry)
Four years. Four years was the amount of time Subaru would be guaranteed to be stuck in this world. He wanted to go home sooner than that, but Beatrice made it clear to him that it would take four years to be able to transport him back home.
The Forbidden Library burned down making the magic to do so more difficult to learn and practice.
Subaru just accepted the four year wait and got back on the carriage the next morning to return home. He didn't know what he was going to do with his life. Everybody he loved was gone, and all he really had left was Ram, but she had already made it clear to him that she was no friend of his any longer.
The ride back to Kararagi was also quiet with no word spoken, Subaru was a changed man. He didn't feel like being friendly and striking up a conversation. All he wanted to do was go home, and forget about everything he did in Lugnica.
He was worried about his parents. He was to be gone for four entire years, and there was no telling about what was going to happen to his family while he was gone.
They were most likely heart broken when they found out that Subaru was gone with no trace of where he went. Subaru already knew the search parties for him came back empty handed, and that all the resources that went into finding him were to all be in vain.
That was unless they found some mage or wizard to assist in the search, but chances of that being a reality were non-existent.
He just hoped his family could hang in until he could finally find his way back home. It made him sad to know when he finally returned home he would be in his twenties. Four years was quite a considerable amount of time of his life.
"You alright there friend? You have been pretty quiet this entire trip. Is everything alright?" The driver asked.
Subaru let out a tired sigh. "No, nothing is going right. I messed up real bad. I don't even know what I was thinking"
"Well we all make mistakes in our lives."
"What I did was on a different level, I'm telling you" Subaru said in a serious tone.
"Maybe put some more thought into it. Is there anything to salvage from what you did."
"I dont know what your talking about"
"Maybe there is something to learn from your actions" The driver said.
Subaru paused for a minute. The driver was sort of right. Subaru learned what lying and running away from his problems got him into.
What happened to Rem was the sole reason why for as long as he lived, Subaru would never tell another lie to anyone. He just couldn't bring himself to lie no more. He completely ran out of words to fabricate.
The driver noticed that Subaru seemed to be getting onto what he was saying. Their destination was approaching, and before Subaru could disembark to continue his life. The driver had few words to say before he disappeared into the densely populated city.
"Well.. End of the line is approaching… I wish you luck on your adventures, friend."
"Well thank you for the ride" Subaru said
The carriage stopped in front of Subarus home and Subaru got off and started to make his way to the door, feeling slightly better from his nice conversation with the driver.
Subaru looked over to Rems' small garden and saw it slightly overgrown. He just couldn't just allow the garden Rem loved so much to get overgrown and demolished by the elements.
So he went in and grabbed some garden supplies and went to work. The garden would act as Rems' memorial.
The first year of his life in Kararagi was filled with nothing but depression and sadness. Subaru barely left the house, he had become shut in once more. If someone else had entered into his house they would probably think he was crazy by the way he was living.
Despite his house having two bedrooms he refused to use any of them, even going as far as to lock both doors.
The living room had become his new bedroom and even that wasn't saved from changes. Subaru had the couch Rem and himself would sit on, moved outside and into the shed.
Subaru has a hard time sleeping, always wishing Rem was right by his side, but she wasn't.
While isolating himself from the rest of society, Subaru took it upon himself to learn some Kararagi style mathematics, not knowing what else to do. Using his previous knowledge from his own worlds education he was able to grasp the mathematics of finance in Kararagi pretty easily.
It was nearing the end of his second year in Kararagi that he had finally used up all himself and Rems savings. He was close to being broke and needed to find himself another job, to sustain his lazy lifestyle.
The reason why Subaru was financially secure for two whole years was because he would only use his money to buy food and nothing else. Most of his time in Kararagi was spent laying around and not making himself useful, just waiting to finally go home.
Subaru went out onto the streets one day, and using his knowledge in mathematics was able to land himself a well paying job at the bank. A job that definitely had more glamor then a coal mining job, it also paid extremely well, but it was money Subaru wasn't going to be spending all glamorously. Choosing only to buy food and nothing else.
He reckoned that he was just going to give all his savings to the poor when he went back to Japan. It wouldn't be worth anything to him anymore. It wasn't like he was planning on coming back.
The sun descended in the horizon bringing forth the time of night. The streets were lit up and most of the population had gone home. Subaru was an exception, making his way home after another day of extremely boring but high paying bank work.
He looked down at the sidewalk as he kicked a small rock forward to provide him some sort of entertainment. Really the only entertainment he wanted was to finally be able to watch TV and go on the internet once more.
The stone age was really starting to get dull for Subaru. He liked all the magic stuff at first, but the longer he stayed the more dull it became. Add that to the fact he lived by himself, life was boring in Kararagi.
"Listen at least I am giving you the courtesy of choosing at least"
Subarus attention shifted down an alleyway where he saw a certain pink haired someone who he hasn't seen in over two years, but has never left his mind. To Subaru's confusion, he didn't understand why she was still dressed in her maid uniform.
"I don't know… I just… Are you sure that's something you want from me, Master Montano…?" Ram asked.
She leaned away from her seemingly brand new master who was trying to make himself look convincing to his offer by getting closer to her.
Subaru just stood there unsure of what was happening. He debated whether he should walk off and just leave Ram like she requested two years back, but he just hated the fact she looked extremely uncomfortable and scared looking at her supposed new master she was serving under.
Ram's new master held out his hand and caressed her cheek, an action to which made Subaru slightly angry. He could tell by the luftfull look in his eye that he was looking for a more personal type of service from Ram.
Even though Ram told Subaru that she wanted nothing more to do with him and that he should just leave her alone for the rest of her life. Subaru didn't have it in him to let Ram stand there and get taken advantage of right in front of him.
"What do you think you're doing, Montano or whatever your name is?" Subaru called out making his presence known.
Both Ram and Montano looked at him. Ram's face grew agitated seeing Subaru again. She still held resentment for his actions two years ago. What he did to her was unforgivable, and she was determined to hold him to it until she was dead in the ground.
"Who are you?" Montano said.
"That's the face of the man who got my sister killed," Ram said.
Subaru didn't react though these words pained him gratefully since in his mind it couldn't have been more far than the truth. He never in a million years wanted Rem to die, or anyone for that matter.
"Oh really, why did you kill her sister, sir?" Montano said in a disappointed tone that was obviously fake.
"Leave Ram alone" Subaru said.
"Why don't you clear off mister!"
Montano tried to go back to trying to seduce Ram for her services, thinking that Subaru would just walk off. But he never did and continued to stand there trying to make himself look serious for once.
"Leave Ram alone, i'm not going to ask you again you animal" Subaru said in a more demanding tone.
The perverted master of Ram let out a giant scoff upon hearing Subarus witty demand.
"Barusu, I told you to leave me alone!" Ram said.
Hearing Ram call him Barusu again triggered a small wave of nostalgia from his time at the Rosswal mansion, he missed seeing Emilia, Ram, and Rem every day.
"Ram, I am not letting you become a prostitute. I don't care what you have to say about it" Subaru said in a serious voice.
Rams face scrunched up upon hearing Subaru's stubborn stance, she just wanted him to leave her alone forever and to stop showing up and getting himself involved in other people's problems.
"This ain't protituation" Monatano said in a defensive tone.
"Then what is it like!?' ' Subaru said.
"You know what, I've had it with you. Come along now Ram let's get away from this person"
"I'm not letting you take Ram so you can just continue to chirp in her ear. She's clearly uncomfortable with your request so why don't you just leave her alone"
"Why do you care so much, you two clearly aren't friends… Anymore at least"
"Even if she doesn't see me as a friend. I am not letting Ram degrade herself"
"Barusu-"
"Not now Ram!" Subaru interrupted.
"You know if you want her so badly. It's going to cost you"
"What are you talking about?"
"If you want one of my maids you have to pay. I'm not your source of charity"
"... You mean I can pay for Ram, so will she be hired as my maid or…"
Ram let out a very loud growl the second she heard Subaru talk about her becoming his maid. Last thing she wanted was to serve somebody like Subaru. Who was the bane of her existence.
"Well you're simply paying for her contract. Once you pay me you can do whatever with her. You can let her go her own path, or have her work for you. Whatever you want"
"Alright then how much?"
"How much do you have?"
Subaru reached into his pocket and pulled out a heavy bag of currency from his pocket that served as his wallet. He slid it over to Montano hoping it was enough to earn Rams contract.
Working at the bank paid very well, but Subaru just chose to save most of the money he earned, not really spending it all on anything. Since nothing really caught his interest. Money meant little to Subaru, since he only really bought food and that was it.
"Well Ram. Looks like you have a new home… Or whatever he's going to do with you" Montano said as he took the entire bag of currency and shoved it into his jacket.
He turned off and disappeared into the night, unknowingly getting a staredown of shame from Subaru who hated his guts for seeing Ram to be nothing more than cattle that could be bought and used for his weird pleasures.
The second Rams now former master left, she collapsed onto the ground and began to cry, she was now bought out from her job and was forced to be by Subaru.
"Why won't you just leave me alone!" Ram cried out.
Subaru paused for a minute unsure how to proceed to his second chance at redeeming himself in front of Ram.
"Listen… I'm sorry… I'm really sorry, but I… Well"
"Well you're sorry. Yeah I heard you already. Sorry isn't going to bring Rem back" Ram said.
"I know… It's just that, well… It's not… Or what I mean is, I never wanted for Rem to get sick."
"You had a choice, why didn't you come back or try to do anything to stop what was happening?" Ram said.
"I never wanted for anyone to die. If I had the choice to put myself in Rems or even Rosswals place, I would do it. I really mean that. For the past two years I have never been more miserable" Subaru said.
Subaru held out his hand to Ram, deciding to make his daring move that could maybe salvage their broken relationship.
"Listen I will let you go if you want, but why don't me and you just go out to dinner and talk this whole thing out… Like adults or responsible people" Subaru said.
Ram let out a giant scoff at Subarus pathetic offer, and began to walk off. Subaru felt like his heart was crushed seeing Ram walk off when he seemingly just spilled his guts out to her.
He wasn't going to let Ram leave him, she was now going to get the Emilia treatment. Subaru began to follow Ram as she walked down the sidewalk.
She stopped noticing how Subaru was following her.
"Barusu, stop following me. Didn't you say you would leave me alone?" Ram said in a cold tone.
"No, I said I will let you go, not leave you alone" Subaru said.
Ram began to walk off again at a faster speed than before, but Subaru still was right behind not letting her go so easily.
She stopped again and turned around to look at Subaru, her face scrunched up with anger and annoyance.
"I told you to stop following me!" Ram said.
"And I told you no"
"Stop being so persistent. So this is what it's like to be Emilia"
Ram turned her back again and began to walk at an even faster pace, practically running from Subaru, but once again just like last time Subaru wasn't letting her go and ran with her down the sidewalk.
"You know… Jogging is actually a good way to relieve stress where I'm from" Subaru said.
"Stop talking to me!" Ram shouted.
"Why don't you stop Ram! Why won't you just sit down and listen to what I have to say for once! Maybe we can sort this whole thing-"
Ram suddenly stopped in her tracks, Subaru ran into her, but both of them were able to keep their balance and not fall to the ground.
"Why should I listen to you Barusu! You ruined my life and my sister is dead. What more is there to say!"
"Please you're all I have left. I am not looking for your forgiveness. I will tell you what, If you go with me to dinner just this one time. I promise to you now. I will leave you alone for the rest of your life if you wish. Just one... date, and I will go for good"
Silence then ascended upon the two as Ram tried to figure out whether she should accept his offer.
To Subarus distraught, he saw Ram turned her back once more and prepared to walk off again.
"Please Ram listen, I'm sorry I ruined your life. I suffer for it everyday. Just one date and I will go forever. You will never see me again, just give me only an hour of your time please!" Subaru pleaded.
Ram stopped in her tracks and turned back around and saw the look of desperation in Subarus eyes, and let out a sigh.
"Fine, Barusu… We can go to dinner one time, but just know we still aren't friends''
"Thank you Ram!" Subaru shouted out.
He couldn't hold back his excitement and enthusiasm. He felt himself run up and hug Ram tightly, but he was aggressively shoved off immediately
"Rule number one, don't touch me" Ram said.
"Alright then, as you wish"
Subaru and Ram walked to a restaurant and got themselves a table to finally have their long awaited heart to heart chat.
Subaru has only one last chance.
"So, what have you been up to since we last met?" Subaru asked.
"... Got myself a new maid job at Montanos estate…"
"Was it a maid job or… Was it a sexual sort of job"
"It was a normal maid job at first. My master had many maids who did those sorts of favors for him, but… He was starting to get bored of them and wanted some "purity" and… You can guess what happened"
"Did you ever accept!?"
"No, we never did anything like that. He would constantly ask, but I would always put him off. Time went on and he just kept constantly asking"
"I could tell by only twenty seconds of meeting him, that he was only seconds away from just raping you. The way he leaned in and touched you all weirdly"
"Don't remind me," Ram said.
Ram dropped her head down low and looked into her lap, as she felt tears start to stream down her face. She missed Rem and Rosswal everyday and hated the life she was living for two entire years.
"Ram are you crying?" Subaru asked.
"No…"
Not being able to hold back her tears any longer Ram started to silently sob in her hands.
"Don't be sad Ram, you are away from him now. Your alright" Subaru said.
"I just feel so ashamed at what I put myself through Barusu. I am a failure to Rem, I wasn't even there to say goodbye to her. I just had to arrive one day late. Baraus I am just a horrible sister"
"No you're not. You were an amazing sister, I know if I had a sibling I wouldn't treat them as kindly as you guys did with each other. Where I am from, siblings just fought with each other constantly."
"Why did I have to be late Barusu! Just one day late!"
"Ram you know more than anyone that it was all completely my fault for what happened. Listen I loved Rem too, and for an entire year I just stayed at home and did nothing but cry myself to sleep everyday" Subaru said.
"I guess that's one thing we both had in common," Ram said.
A waitress eventually arrived and served Subaru and Ram two glasses of fine wine, paid for by Subaru. When the waitress walked off, just looked at her glass, unsure if she should be drinking in a public place.
Subaru just looked over to her giving her a confident smile.
"Barsu are you sure we should be drinking in front of everyone?" Ram asked.
"Just one glass won't hurt," Subaru said as he consumed his glass in a matter of seconds.
"Alright then…"
One glass turned into two glasses, and two glasses turned into three. Ram and Subaru just kept having glass after glass of wine to the point they lost track of how much they had.
Getting themselves so drunk to the point they started talking about nonsense that didn't even make sense. Their words have become so slurred, they were barely understandable. Subaru would tell Ram a random joke that came to his mind, and Ram would just laugh like it was the funniest thing she ever heard.
Obviously both of them were becoming a big disturbance to everyone in the restaurant who were getting tired of all the noise coming from their table.
"Alright, you two are cut off from anymore drinks" The waitress said.
"Why?" Subaru asked.
"Because you two have had enough and are starting to become a disturbance, and we are going to also have to ask you to please leave."
Ram and Subaru got up and made their way out of the restaurant. They were both drunk into oblivion. Being so drunk they couldn't even stand up straight, in fact they could barely stand at all but Subaru was still able to somehow lead Ram to his home.
Subaru walked up to the door and pulled out his key from his pocket. He dropped it at first trying to align it to the keyhole, but he was successful in his second attempt.
Upon entering Ram marveled at how messy Subaru left his home. With unclean dishes and unfolded clothes scattered all over the place.
"Ha, nice place Barusu," Ram said sarcastically, marveling at how messy he left the living room.
"Why thank you Ram" Subaru said, not getting the sarcasm in Rams comment.
"So where am I sleeping?"
"... Ummm we only have one couch" Subaru said.
"Do you seriously don't have any bedrooms in this house?" Ram asked.
"I do have some bedrooms, but we are NOT touching them..." Subaru stated.
"Well then what are we supposed to do?"
"Share a couch like real people," Subaru said.
"I'm not sharing a couch with you Barusu" Ram declared.
"Your gonna have to because I locked the bedroom doors and I can't remember where I placed the key"
"Fine then, but you are looking in the opposite direction, and do not touch me" Ram said
Subaru and Ram awkwardly laid down on the couch and tried to drift off. They were so close that they could feel each other's body heat.
After a couple minutes passed, Subaru thought that Ram had drifted off to sleep. Subaru rolled over and hugged Ram tightly just like he did with Rem two years ago. He knew she told him not to touch her, but he couldt hold back any longer.
What Subaru failed to realize was that Ram still held consciousness and could feel him cling onto her like she was his pillow.
"Barusu…"
Subarus heart dropped the second her heard Ram called his name, but to his surprise he didn't feel her resist him in any way.
"Yes…"
"I can feel your perverted area rubbing on me," Ram said.
Subaru let out a cry of embarrassment as he rolled back over to the opposite direction. He waited for Ram to cut his head off for what he did. This could not of been more embarrassing.
Ram on the other hand actually got somewhat aroused from how Subaru was holding her. She didn't understand if it was the alcohol in her system that was making her get all excited, but whatever the case she found herself laying there aroused, having no sign of that feeling leaving her body.
Ram rolled over to Subarus' direction and stared into his back as he pretended to be asleep by providing some obviously fake snores.
"Barusu, you have some apologizing to do" Ram said.
"For what?"
"You know what you did"
"Fine, I'm sorry for… hugging you without your consent, and rubbin-"
Ram interrupted Subaru with a punch in the back, not letting him get into detail.
"That's enough apologizing, but I still won't forgive you. Now look over to me" Ram said.
Subaru reluctantly did as requested and rolled over to look at her, and saw the look of extreme lust in her pink eye.
"Now I want to show you what happens when you get me all aroused," Ram said.
"What are you talking about? Just go to slee-"
Without seemingly any warning he felt Ram press herself onto his lips and start to kiss him. She also wrapped her arms around his neck so he couldn't push her away.
Subarus mind was in shock and was going crazy in a drunken mess. He didn't know what was happening, but he couldn't find the willpower to resist her because if he were being honest he was kind of enjoying it.
While making out Ram rolled on top of Subaru and broke away creating a string of saliva from their kiss.
"Now, me and you are going to do something very fun together" Ram said.
"Is this seriously happening?" Subaru asked
"Are you trying to chicken out now after getting this far?" Ram asked as she began undressing.
"No, not at all," Subaru said.
He didn't remember anything after that. His consciousness regained hearing the birds chirping in the beautiful outdoors, and the feeling of somebody on top of him.
Feeling sick and having a massive headache, Subaru let out a groan as he opened his eye lids. Almost having a heart attack seeing Ram sleeping on top of him with their clothes scattered all over the living room.
"I am so dead" Subaru thought to himself.