Ship Counselor Shenanigans

by ErnestTBass

Boats with feelings, what do?

20. Thresholds

I once again sat down at my desk in my office. It'd been some time since I last did this. A lot had happened, and a lot was admittedly still happening. However, it was still important to sit down and make time for promises I'd made to others and myself. I had a little bit of a stomach ache (side effects from Sheffield's anesthetic), so I decided against coffee or tea. Probably a good choice, since the two coming in this morning probably wouldn't like it. I instead had boxes of juice and water. Kids liked those… I guessed. The day was chilly and humid, and I wasn't worried if the visitors would try to tear my head off. There was a knock at the door. I reclined in my chair and told them to enter.

The past few people to enter the office had to duck to do so, which made me wonder if the door was actually made up to the standard height. Either that, or I lived with above-standard people. The latter was most likely. These two newcomers to the harbor easily cleared the doorway, however.

The first through was Amagi-chan, who respectfully bowed immediately upon entering. She was always courteous and soft-spoken, just like her sister/bigger clone. Regardless, she was extremely intelligent and mature for her outward appearance, and despite only existing for a short while, contributed greatly to strategic operations. Her somewhat outdated tactics and tendency to get flustered were the only thing holding her back, but I felt that wouldn't be for long.

Unfortunately, Amagi-chan's respectful bow gave the person behind her a faceful of fox tail. Little Enterprise sputtered and flailed around as she was blinded. Amagi-chan turned around and immediately apologized with a bow. However, the pair of pointed ears on top of her head poked Little E in both of the eyes. At this point, the Union ship, both blinded and spitting hair out of her mouth, swatted around wildly. Both of them entered a brief scuffle in the doorway as Amagi-chan attempted to help, and Little E fended off the supposed assault.

I thought a little about Little E as well. After a joke that ran around the harbor's imageboard, she was then known by everyone as "Smol E", although this immediately shortened to "Smallie". Since the joke wasn't mockery, Little E didn't mind it, at least on the surface. Unlike Big E, she was pretty competitive, and often saw herself as inadequate. Regardless, she was a tough kid, and I had no doubt she'd go far. I mean, look who she was.

Speaking of, there was a slight problem. After those two appeared outside of the Akashi's laboratory complex(read: unintentionally escaped), there was the usual yelling at the secretive cat. However, some conversations with Little E revealed that she, unlike the rest of her age group, remembered full well her decommissioning and scrapping. To be fair, the little ships' mechanics were still unknown, and we had no idea how the Zeppelin/Zeppy situation worked, but a much quieter and more serious talk was had. Giving such graphic memories to a child wasn't to be tolerated or there would be consequences.

Eventually, I got tired of the two of them slapping each other in the doorway, and I said, "Good morning."

Both of them immediately stopped. Little E immediately saluted in the Union way, accidentally hitting her hat. It fell off her head and hit the floor. Akagi-chan almost bowed again, realized what happened last time, and saluted Union-style as well. I said, "At ease."

Little E asked, "Can it pick up my hat?"

"Permission granted."

The hat was restored to it's proper place. I gestured to two wooden chairs and said, "Sit down, guys." They did so. I asked, "Either of you thirsty? I managed to get some juice."

Both of them sighed a little. Little E said, "I like coffee. I thought everybody here drank it. It's my favorite." Amagi-chan continued, "I prefer tea. Union juice boxes are too sweet."

Little E said, "Except apple juice. I like that."

"Apple juice is fine. What's that gross thing Unioners drink? Faygo?"

"Yeah, that stuff's gross. Keep drinking apple juice. Long Island says only lames drink faygo or lemonade."

I interrupted, "Let's keep this together. I have grape, apple, or water."

Little E replied, "Water." Amagi-chan said, "Can you make tea with the water?"

I sighed, "Not realistically."

"Water."

Next time, I reminded myself to just hand them both water with no questions. I'd rather have them complain about the drink, than spend time arguing about what they wanted. I kicked off the meeting with the question, "So, I know you just arrived here recently, but how are you liking things so far?"

Amagi-chan said, "Fine. Things are going well. The teachers at school have accepted me."

Little E replied, "I'm doing okay, too. Am I in trouble?"

I said, "Oh, neither of you are. I'm just doing this because you both are new and I wanted to make sure there weren't any complaints. I mean, you didn't exactly ask to be here."

Little E took a sip from her water and said, "Yeah, but better than not being anywhere."

I had to sit back and process that one. Little E sat on the chair, absentmindedly swinging her legs and unintentionally dropping profound wisdom.

Amagi-chan said, "I'm fine. You know who isn't fine? I saw Roon-san walking around yesterday at recess. She's always got an escort with her."

Little E commented, "I heard she can't be by herself because she did something bad. She's scary. I was worried she'd just start running at us or something. Her eyes are spooky, too."

I said, "Don't worry about her. She's not allowed near you guys."

Amagi-chan said, "She's scary to me, as well. Don't you have to talk to her after this, Commander?"

"...Yeah. How'd you know that?"

"I heard. Why are you going to see her?"

"I have to. We have stuff to make and it's my job."

"Why's it your job?"

"Because it's what I chose to do with my life."

"Did you think you were going to do this?"

"No way."

"Can you quit?"

"Anytime, but I don't think I ever will."

"Are you scared of her?"

I shifted uncomfortably in my chair and replied, "...A little, but also other things."

"If you're so scared of her, what's the thing you're making that's so important?"

"I really don't know. She's the one who'll make it. I don't even know if it'll work."

Little E asked, "Does anybody else know about it?"

I replied, "No, and do me a favor and keep it a secret, okay?"

They both nodded. I continued, "Sometimes you have to do bad things and deal with bad people to get where you need to go. Can't really be all that picky in war."

Amagi-chan asked, "Is that why you still speak to her?"

"It's why I speak to many of us. The sirens are so much of a threat, that if we started bickering amongst ourselves like before, we'd lose almost every foothold we'd gained."

"Then our strategic situation is more precarious than I thought."

"Precarious is a pretty big word, but it's the correct one. However-". I took a sip of water. "-there's some big plans in the works."

Little E scooted forward in her seat and asked, "Like what?"

I replied, "Game-changers. Maybe game-enders, if things go right. To be honest, we'll need just as many spiritualists as we will strategists for this to work. The details are foggy, but some of the PR ships will be important."

Both of them blankly blinked at me. Little E asked again, "And… what if it works?"

"I… really don't want to make any promises, but if everything goes the more optimistic way… we might just win."

To win was inconceivable, even for myself. This was a menace barely understood, but communication was extremely fast in Azur Lane. The philosophers in it were contemplating things. Both of the little ships admitted that they had no idea what they'd do if total victory happened. For the next few minutes, we had casual conversation, but it was more about local happenings and gossip. I'd already determined that they both seemed to be stable and content individuals, better off than me. After I sent them out, I sat for a few moments, contemplating things. I then remembered I had someone to speak with, or at least speak to.

[=====================]

Tirpitz and Admiral Hipper were on the engine deck of the nearly-finished Odin construction project. It was astonishing how fast the manjuus, bulins, and human engineers worked together. As the project continued, both Tirpitz and Hipper realized that it steadily grew colder inside. The bulkheads, rooms, and hallways, which previously felt like they were unfinished, almost imperceptibly became stern, calculated, and judgemental. To those who already were those things, such as Tirpitz, this was no issue. Hipper was sometimes asked why she occasionally glared at seemingly nothing.

Inside the power plant control room, both of them boggled at the unfathomable amount of buttons, dials, switches, and lights. Somehow, the human engineers understood exactly how they worked. The bulins and manjuus were banned from entering the room. However, Akashi was also there, and up to her elbows in wiring. While considered to be a mad scientist/planner, she sometimes enjoyed on the ground labor. Tools that she needed miraculously sprang from inside the sleeves of her jacket and were used with the dexterity of a brain surgeon. From Akashi's perspective, she believed she was one.

Tirpitz eventually got bored and sent Hipper to supervise the main battery work. Tirpitz then approached Akashi and asked, "I could ask you what you are doing, but I doubt I would get anything coherent."

Akashi half-focusedly said, "She'll be a big thinker, nya. Doesn't like me in here. Doesn't like me messing with her heart, nope, nope. Closer she is to sailing, closer she is kicking me out. Too smart, this one. Almost as smart as me."

Tirpitz scoffed, "You speak like you already know."

Akashi's head disappeared inside the panel. "Kinda, sorta. What you plan and what happens is rarely the same, but I can guess! Smart, cold, but boring, nya! Like you and your sister, except without the smart."

"That's rather insulting. Bismarck and I are heads of the Iron Blood fleet for a reason. Now that we've almost completed our Plan Z lineup, we-"

"Oooo, Iron Blood wants to talk to me about nyaval doctrine? Come back when you win more than just underwater. You're big and modern, but that's about it." Akashi then loudly whispered, "That's why you nyeed leashes."

"A leash?! If you're referring to the specialized device "secretly" placed inside my sister, it won't be long before our best technicians in the fatherland find it and remove it."

Akashi slowly lifted her head out of the panel, revealing a single yellow feline eye that stared directly at Tirpitz. "Who said it was just for her, nya? Also, you won't find that thing. Nyot in a millnyan years."

"How could you possibly know that?"

The eye's pupil slitted and continued it's unbreaking stare. "Who do you think made it?"

Both of them stared at each other. Tirpitz was frozen in place, looking at the cat in front of her that graduated from mischievous to dangerous. Akashi finalized the segment with, "Cover your bases, nya!" Her head disappeared back into the panel.

She broke the silence again with, "You know what else is great? I was thinking that this ship was missing something. Then, it hit me! Odin, lightnying, it made sense! She had the eye, but now she needed the thunder! So, I myadified the main battery to discharge all the excess power into lightnying bolts! No more power overpressure problems!"

Tirpitz used an enormous amount of discipline to keep her composure. After a pause, she added, "Retrofitting a ship before it even leaves the yard. Of course. I feel like engineers recruit from sanatoriums."

Akashi lifted a single needle-nose plier and said, "I'm a scientist, nyot an engineer. Architect works as well, nya."

[========================]

The heat was eternal, and the air was thick with unyielding humidity. At first, the ships were uncertain with their actions wildly diverging from their original objectives. After the semi(successful) temporary thwarting of a siren plot, the ships settled down for a more relaxed period. Occasionally, one or two of them would be sent to interact with the locals, but their contacts had been strangely silent. They took their downtime very seriously, as it could be violently snatched away from them at any moment. However, after the next few days, the relaxation turned to boredom. They couldn't be stagnant, as that would invite a surprise attack. Instead, they just did things like clean themselves and check for wear. When those tasks were over, they checked again to make sure nothing was missed. When those were done, the idleness started to wear on their sanity.

Hornet and Taihou found a time when the weather was "good enough" and sent their newfangled hi-def camera planes to scout out where the enemy was suspected to be. The success was mixed.

"Hundreds of thousands of dollars-"

"And eleven million yen."

"..and that, and what do we get? A gray picture with a fuzzy black and yellow thing in the middle."

"I say it's a Strategist. Next to it must be an Oceana."

"Impossible. How could you possibly believe that's a Strategist? Look at the pointy bits going sideways more than upward. It is obviously a Breaker."

"Are you gonna seriously tell me you think it's a Breaker because of the 'pointy bits'?"

"My Eye does not deceive. I have already won two bets. Would you like to try for a third?"

"Y'all ain't gonna tell me that this is an Oceana."

"With this image quality, it could just as easily be an instance of Observer."

"...And if it is?"

"We run like hell and scream as loud as we can on the radio for help."

Hornet snatched the picture printout and flung it across the table. She said, "Our mission was recon, but we can't do any of it because of this stupid weather!"

Shigure commented over the radio, "At least we know that they are there, and there are two of them."

Akatsuki added, "-If not more."

Taihou said, "Of course. Of course. It seems spying from the air will do us no good. Perhaps we should just send one of the destroyers out for picket duty. Else, and I prefer this one, we simply strike them with all of our forces at once. Why bother with all of the subtleties?"

Hornet countered, "Yeah, but we don't know what we'd be charging into, or how many of them there actually are. Not to mention the land airbase we'd been told about. That could still be there."

Taihou smirked, "What's the matter? I thought you were the ambitious type. Lost your fire?"

Hornet snapped back, "I been sunk before. So've you. D'you really wanna go talkin' to me about fire?"

Taihou's grin immediately disappeared. Those present darted their eyes back and forth, wondering what the carriers' next actions would be. Those on the radio anxiously waited for another sound. There wasn't one for a few seconds.

Taihou finally spoke. "We don't need a two-fronted war. Perhaps we should settle matters on the land, then deal with the sirens. Even I will admit this politics game isn't our specialty, and is getting rather frustrating. Maybe we should strike the snake at the head, as we should have from the beginning."

Hornet thought for a moment, then said, "...I agree. We're not doin' much out here. What can we do?"

Taihou shrugged, "I suppose we could quit playing this obnoxious espionage game(which we're terrible at) and 'cut off the head of the snake', as I said."

Amazon raised her hand and said, "With all the respect madam, I must ask. You… you don't mean to kill him, do you?"

"If it comes to that." Taihou looked to Hornet for support, but her expression was neutral.

Amazon replied, "B-but we're not supposed to do that. We're supposed to protect people from sirens! We're supposed to destroy sirens, not the opposite!"

"This human has betrayed us for the sirens, and that makes them no different."

"But we don't do that! We never have!"

"Well, there was that one time east of the Dragon Empery."

Cleveland interrupted, "Commander said we don't talk about that. Hornet, what are you gonna do?"

Hornet's face returned from being spaced out into reality. She said, "I'm… I'm always gonna be extra careful around the civvies. We're supposed to be protecting humanity, but if I've gotta choose between one of them and one of y'all… you know who I'm gonna pick."

That statement hung in the air for a bit. Hornet said again, "All right, y'all. Let's move out and make landfall. We'll just… keep an ear to the ground from there."

[=================================]

A few hours later and in a completely different place, the current president of Panama stroked his mustache. There were some confusing reports going around and he had to get to the bottom of the situation. Something strange was going on; something possibly seditious. He absolutely didn't need that right now. He'd already made numerous deals that were in motion that were fragile. He'd always thought about being in charge of his country, really being in charge. He knew he'd make it something worth talking about, something powerful, something more than just "the place where the canal is". Then, the sirens quietly spoke with him, and he saw true power. He didn't want that, because admittedly, it scared him. However, they said they would change things where he was on top, and the rest of the world wouldn't even notice. He looked around his office, which had slowly been turned into more of a throne room. He'd let the totalitarian get to him before he'd even become one. However, that would change soon, if the sirens weren't lying.

One of his most trusted advisors looked up from his phone and said, "He is coming, Arturo."

Excellent. He preferred speaking directly with people, because he felt he was a good judge of character. It was extremely difficult to determine if someone was lying through a report of a report of a witness account.

The two guards opened the ornate mahogany doors. In walked a menial infantryman flanked by two grizzled MP's. Arturo straightened himself up and put on a crocodile smile. He got out of his chair and said, "Good to see you, mister Thompson."

The infantryman immediately stopped, saluted and said, "I'm honored, president Rex."

"Please, just call me Arturo. I think this conversation should be casual."

"Yes Arturo… sir."

Arturo walked around the desk and up to the man. He said, "Do you know why I called you here?"

"A-a-about the woman, right?"

"Yes, yes, the very strange woman. Now, I like talking directly to people, so they can feel like they're being heard. People are also less likely to lie to another's face. Are you planning on lying today, mister Thompson?"

"Never, sir. I'd never lie to you, ever."

"Very good. Now, tell me exactly what happened and why a fireteam of my best men are in the hospital right now, except you."

"W-w-well, we were sent to tail one of the suspected people, the legislator, I believe. We followed him and he entered this small commercial building. Then, command gave us the go to breach the building. We did so, no problems, very quietly. Then, we burst in the final door, and found all the people we were looking for, and a few others. We found the legislator, along with-"

"Yes, yes. I know who was there, but what happened?"

"W-w-w-"

The president put his hand on the man's shoulder and said, "Take your time, man. I just want to know what happened."

"We breached, and there were people around a table, like I said. But, there was one more right in front of us, a woman. She was kind of small, wasn't wearing much, and I thought I saw cat ears, but it could've been her hair."

"...Cat ears?"

"Could've been her hair."

"...Then what happened?"

"We ordered everyone to put their hands up and stay still, but the woman just stood up and yelled at us."

"What did she say?"

"Something about how we weren't supposed to do this. Sergeant gave her the last warning to put her hands up. Instead she charged us and the sergeant shot at her head."

"Ah, so she's dead."

"No! That's the thing! We all saw and heard it hit! It just bounced off, like we'd hit a tank! Then she got mad and took out the sergeant in one kick! We all tried to shoot, but the same thing happened! I… retreated."

"Do you know where she is now?"

"No… I don't."

Arturo studied the man's face for a moment. He looked like he was truthful, but this was disturbing. Arturo said, "Fine. Try not to run like last time. You should go to your… debriefing. Goodbye." He saluted.

The infantryman also saluted and was escorted out. His advisor asked, "Do we inform the sirens?"

"No, Enrico. We need their confidence, and the less they look at us, the better. In the meantime, I will prepare as quickly as I can for… whatever she is."

[==============================================]

I once again walked down the halls of the Iron Blood dormitory. Some of it was covered in canvas for repairs after the raid. However, the end was undamaged, and didn't even have any cracks in the drywall. Luck was once again ironic. Noshiro was the current guard. She was the quiet type and said nothing to me. She let her expression alone do the talking, and it was quizzical. I silently nodded. She sighed, shrugged, and gestured toward the door. I entered.

It was dim, like usual. It's lone occupant was on the table next to the window. The only difference was a heavily-modified laptop on the table. The charging cable was padlocked to it, and then attached once again to the wall socket. All other sockets on the computer had been covered, most likely removed. I'd heard a little bit of what was done to it. The entire machine, software and hardware, had been gutted. What couldn't be removed was locked out. The entire machine did three things: Turn on, make text files, and turn off.

It wasn't that we didn't trust Roon. She just wasn't allowed around things that couldn't be broken, or around things that could break other people. She also required constant supervision in case she found/made either of the two things mentioned above. Or, maybe I was just dodging around an uncomfortable fact of life. People tolerated her at best.

Roon sat at the table, the light of the screen and outside made her face practically glow. She turned to look at me with a delighted look on her face. With the light illuminating all sides of her, she looked practically angelic. Reality was ironic. She greeted me with a genuine smile and quietly gestured for me to sit. I contemplated arguing, but couldn't find any reason to do so. I sat. As I walked to sit, she closed the computer. I asked, "Am I not allowed to see?"

Roon chucked, "It's not you're not allowed. I wouldn't want you to be hurt."

"Oh that's a fat lie."

"Not like that. It wouldn't hurt you like a wound, it would hurt you as a person. I would never, ever do that to you."

I blinked in astonishment at Roon's apparent amnesia of the past long time. I simply asked, "Is it what I asked you to make?"

"Yes yes! I'm so happy to finally make something for you. This will be a labor of love, I promise. You'll see."

"Is that the only reason you're happy? You usually give us lip when we tell you to do things. What's the difference?"

"Oh, I just love it when everyone(except you, of course) shuns me, but then they suddenly need me, and everyone hates it! I can't get enough! It's almost enough to make you believe in fate."

"That… are you sure you understand the task we've given you? It's not as critical as you're making it out to be."

"I know exactly what I'm doing, and I know it's important."

"Explain it then."

Roon thought for a second, then said, "Do you remember the show you used to watch with me? Mounting…"

"Monty Python?"

"Yes, the very funny one. Do you remember the world's funniest joke? The one where people perished laughing?"

"Yeah."

"Imagine… something like that, except I'm not joking, or maybe I am. You know I love you dearly, so don't do something foolish like reading it."

I sighed, "Well, changing subject, we're planning on changing doctrine… again."

"Oh, really? Tell me more."

"Azur Lane used to be used for defense, but since our hold on the world has become more steady, we're thinking about changing things. Mass-produced ships are easy to make, but aren't nearly as potent as us. However, there's a lot more of them. Our idea is to switch the mass-produced ships to guard duty, like for coastlines and convoys. Then, Azur Lane will become a more mobile and aggressive unit, busting siren bases and other junk."

"An excellent idea, and a long time coming, too. The raid in the southern pacific reminded me just how fun it was. To have your thumbs around a siren's eyes as you slowly sque-"

"Let's not. I just ate."

Roon returned from rumination and said, "Fine. Have you ever thought about the end of the world?"

"Uhh… Sometimes. I don't like to."

"I think we're going to do it. I don't think it'll be the sirens; I think it'll be us. I think we'll kill every last siren in the world and then just replace them in domination."

"Why would we do that? That sounds terrible."

Roon looked at me dead in the eyes and cracked a smile. "Speak for yourself. I like being able to do whatever I want. I bet when the dust settles, you'll just send me off like you always do to control some backwater nation, then I'll really have some fun. I think you Unioners call them 'Banana Republics'."

"See? It's stuff like that! That's the reason why I can't let you out of my sight for a second!"

Roon then leaned forward across the table with a face of absolute victory and said, "That's the point. That's why I know you'll never leave me, because the only other option is to kill me, and you can't do that."

I slowly lowered my head into my hand. It covered all of my face, except for one eye, which threatened to tear up out of frustration. I'd been pinned. She'd won. Roon played a far simpler game, and that made it far easier for her to succeed in it. I heard her stand up from her chair and walk around the table.

I felt a warm embrace come from behind me. I suddenly felt immense comfort and love. Her arms wrapped around and she put her chin on my shoulder. She whispered, "I promise to be good as long as I'm around you. All I need is a promise from you to never discard me, because I'll always remember you."

The word "never" escaped my mouth before I even had a chance to think about it. Roon continued, "I'm not just going to kill them, you know. They're in my way. They're in the way of how things should be. You're a man of war, so if the war ends, then you're free. Don't worry, I'll free you, but I want to do it my way. This is personal, and I'm going to handle it… personally."

She pointed to the computer. "Do you see this? This is death, but I added some special flavors of my own. See, we know the sirens know more than we do. A lot more, in fact. So, rather than fighting it, I'm betting on it. This is special because it only kills things that can know. Now, we can know a lot, which means it'll do very bad things to us, mostly death."

"But if the sirens know as much as they say they do, I can't even guess. Maybe you could ask that oversized Sakuran carrier what her guess is, but while you're at it, tell her to stop spying on me."

She then wrapped her arms around my neck, bordering between an affectionate embrace and a chokehold. She spoke directly into my ear, "But, I have a small request. I want to see my love in action the first time you deploy it."

Words finally came to me. "Yeah, I know. You already asked and it's noted."

Roon put on a face of obviously fake surprise, "Commander, this is the first time I've asked you this. All the running around must make you see and hear things. You should relax before you really go nutty, silly."

"Isn't that what you want?"

"Of course not. I want you at your most honest, but I don't want you broken. Vegetables are only superficial playthings."

I asked, "Don't you… don't you have any empathy?"

Roon chuckled, "Of course I do. I'm just a little different, but you always knew that."

"Yeah, I guess I always did. I have to go, though."

"Aww, right now? Stay a few minutes? For me?"

"Five, no more."

After exactly five, I took my leave. After I walked out. Roon sat down once again in her chair. She opened up the laptop to look at her work. Inside Roon, a small switch flipped. Her facsimile of sanity calmly exited, and a new aspect took the stage. This was the first time that she'd been permitted to do anything with no restrictions. This excited her immensely. She stretched her fingers and began calmly typing, as if composing a poem. Expressions came and left her face at random, and the air around her took on a chill.

[===========================================]

"Okay, Mr. Penultimo, you've got to be a big boy. You've got to come with us, stand up for yourself, and defend your country." Hornet was nearly at her desperate wit's end.

A shaken voice squealed from behind a locked public restroom door, "No! They know I'm here! I've got to get out! The city isn't safe, no, the whole country's not safe for me! I need to beg for sanctuary in the Union! They'll let anyone in, these days."

Cleveland placed her hand against the door and said, "I know you're scared, but you're the only one among us who knows how government works. Don't you have any friends?"

"No! Arturo and I used to be friends, but now he's gone mad with power! I heard that he sent in troops to occupy the legislative building with all the people still inside it, and now nobody will respond to me! They must be dead, and if you don't stop making a scene, I will be too! He's found me once, he can find me again."

Hornet threw her hands up and gestured for Taihou to take over. Taihou sighed, and said, "I promise upon my honor you will be protected. We simply can't have a siren sympathizer with as much power as he has. We can stop him, but then there would be no one to replace him. That chaos would be unacceptable and just as bad. We need someone to take his place."

There was silence, and then they heard the low noise of someone stepping off of a toilet seat. Penultimo said, "You can stop him… right now?"

"Right now."

"And… there's no sirens?"

"I have a patrol squadron flying to the south of the city right now. If there are any sirens, we will be the first to know."

"...And all you need me to do is sit in the empty chair to make sure things don't come to chaos?"

"Yes."

"...Promise?"

"I swear upon the gods."

"Not a lot of pagans around here, but I'll take your word."

The door unlocked, and out tentatively stepped a very disheveled Penultimo. His hair looked closer to a bird's nest than anything else and he'd acquired a red pimple on the front of his nose. The bloodshot eyes were the final obvious sign of the man's stress. He said, "Okay, but we take the side roads to the capital. All of you… stand out too much."

Akatsuki retorted, "I conceal my eye for everyone's safety. To gaze upon it's blinding..."

The casual banter continued as Penultimo let them through the city's streets, ordering everyone to hide every few minutes to "shake tails". Everyone else went along with it at first, then just became impatient. Eventually, they came upon the government building that housed their enemy. They went around back and Penultimo said, "Okay, I will hide somewhere around here. After a few minutes, I will be behind you. I think… I think I have a way of making everything go smoothly. Maybe. Just don't take too long!"

Cleveland said, "Roger that!"

Amazon said, "Taihou, do you actually have a plan?"

Shigure interrupted, "It's Taihou-sama to you."

Amazon looked like she was about to fire back when Taihou lied as easily as she breathed, "Of course I do."

"Oh. Then what, pray tell, is it?"

"We shall simply walk in and to where the man is. There, we will demand he step down or submit to our authority for colluding with the sirens."

Cleveland asked, "Do we… have that authority?"

"Our goal is to defeat the sirens by any means necessary. That is our authority."

Aurora, usually quiet, said, "I guess… that applies."

They confidently entered the building. The generic automatic glass door swung open for them. Their first obstacle approached them… a secretary.

The woman looked overworked and had bags under her eyes. She looked up and adjusted her glasses to behold the newcomers. Hornet confidently stated, "We're here to see Arturo."

"Arturo? Do you… Oh, the president is in his office right now. His schedule is free right now, but… who are you representing?"

Hornet looked around and replied, "We're representing… us!"

"Us? What kind of answer-" She looked again at the clothing of the group and her expression slid to one of depression. "Oh, you're the 'company' he requested. I see. Fine. His office is on the second floor and three doors to the left."

The rest of them were confused at first, but just nodded and continued on their way. The woman at the desk grumbled something under her breath. It was just as the elevator doors were closing that Hornet pointed toward the secretary and asked, "Wait, did she seriously think we were-"

Taihou held up her hand and said, "It's fine. A small strike against the pride is worth it."

They exited the elevator, and knocked on the designated door. Unlike the others, it was very ornate and made of a rare wood. There was no answer. They tried the door and found it unlocked. They swung it open and found no one inside.

The office looked more like a throne room, except instead of a throne, there was a desk. Everything looked expensive. Even the air freshener smelled like luxurious spices. They scanned the room, but nothing appeared to be out of the ordinary. However, there was a pair of double doors to the right. They heard a man say, "In here, ladies."

They opened the doors and looked at a less ornate conference room. The table was oversized in the extreme and was covered in a white tablecloth. On the opposite end of the table sat the man they were after. They stood in the doorway.

Arturo began, "You know, I heard quite a lot about you. You certainly roughed up a squad of my best troops, and from what they told me, you can take bullets like nothing. However, any problem can be solved with preparation. Penultimo's attempts at dodging my eyes were hilarious. With the siren's technology, it was like trying to hide in an empty parking lot."

Hornet asked, "Are you the traitor?"

"Am I the traitor? I guess I am, but let's be honest, I just saw a better deal. Far away from the bigger powers, my country is limited in what it could be. The sirens offered to let me surpass those limits. Despite our size, with the things they promise us, we will be a major power in a decade! There were so many amazing things they can do! When I heard of you coming, I didn't have much time to prepare, but with the sirens'... magic, I think I'm more than ready. Still, I don't know who any of you are."

Hornet said, "I'm Hornet, this is Taihou, and our allies are behind us."

"Oh, codenames, hmmm? Are you some kind of 'revolutionaries'? Back when I was a child, I called myself the Steel Rat. Come on, there's no need to be shy. What are you?"

"I'm an Eagle Union aircraft carrier, CV-8"

The man laughed out loud for half a minute. After catching his breath, he said, "And I am *gasp* an attack helicopter! Oh, you people are just as insane as I imagined. There's no way any of you took out my squad. It must've been dumb luck. However, your luck's just run out, but don't worry! I saved this just in case for a much larger target, but you'll do!"

He grabbed the tablecloth, revealing the table with a glass top. However, under the table was a siren mounted high-caliber gun. It'd been installed in the floor, where most of it was actually in the room underneath it. Everyone in the doorway stood in shock. He yelled, "And now, you will be my attempted 'assassins' that tried to kill me! In return, I was saved by the sirens and pin all of it- Wait a second, why am I telling you this? You're about to die!"

He pressed a remote control and the gun fired off with a deafening noise. The entire room heated up, as if standing inside an oven. A bolt of yellow energy streaked across the room in less than a millisecond, colliding directly into Amazon's chest. She fell over onto her back. Jamaica, purely as a reflex, whipped out one of her batteries and fired a single shot at the siren gun.

It was a direct hit. She shell detonated on impact, and the top half of the gun was torn to shreds. The shell travelled past that, disintegrating both the wall and man behind it. There was now an enormous hole in the wall, which exposed the outside air and the city. Jamaica said, "Oops."

The only noises were the sound of crumbling concrete and creaking wood. The group of ships stood in the doorway and stared at the remains. Amazon groaned and sat up, saying, "Ow, that really hur-", before she went silent as well.

Penultimo exploded through the doorway with a panicked look on his face. He ran over to the scene and looked at it for a few seconds, before he heard dozens of heavy boots running up the hallway. He took only a few seconds to think of something before he ran back to the door, opened it, and screamed, "Bomb! A bomb! The sirens bombed the president!"

The guards charged through the door and all but shoved Penultimo to the side. The ships, still in shock, moved aside to let the guards through. However, the men took one look at the scene and reported that paramedics would not be needed. Penultimo got up and asked them, "So, what has happened? What now?"

One of the senior officers said, "The president discovered a secret meeting where all of the legislation was secretly colluding with the sirens. The sirens must have killed him in retaliation."

"So… what do we do now?"

"Well, it was… almost all of the legislation. All except for you."

"...Oh."

The officer asked, "Who are they?"

"They are… I don't know who they are. They look like they're in shock, and they don't look like terrorists to me."

"They look like… oh, the secretary mentioned the president occasionally orders 'company'. That must be them… Must also be why they look like dead fish right now."

"Yes, that must be it. Come on, ladies. We have to get out of here."

They all left the building, and then the group sat down in a nearby park. Taihou said to Penultimo, "They'll be fine. They just need some time. We will remove that siren presence as soon as we are combat-capable." Penultimo shrugged, and then returned to the building to spin the story.

The ships recovered after a day, and resumed operations in the Gulf of Panama. They were professional, albeit less talkative. They had a lot of pondering to do, or at least most of them. Taihou seemed fine. The excision of siren forces went by the book, with reconnaissance, and an eventual decisive battle. The total kills were a siren Strategist, two Explorers, some tending vessels, and one listening post/airbase. Some of the screening vessels had taken minor damage and a few burns.

A few days on their return trip out to sea, the task force received a communication from the mainland:

"Penultimo here. Things have stabilized. Huge controversy. All of the legislation is gone. Seems those charges stuck. Very strong anti-siren movement. They think sirens killed Arturo. The people are pushing for a government change, and I am the last person untouched by scandal. I plan to run for office! The odds are good that I may be the only person to run at all! If I win, Azur Lane will always find an ally in Panama, above anyone else. I give my word."

[====================]

Meanwhile, thousands of miles away, both Akagi and Kaga still meditated inside their sanctum. Obviously they weren't going to be useless during their refit, but they fully intended to make the most of the downtime. This mostly meant aiding in strategic planning with other operations. Mentally, but not physically, demanding work. Akagi was aware that those things came more naturally to her than her sister. Kaga was simply a more hands-on person, but Akagi had noticed she'd performed some rudimentary "wheeling and dealing", as the Unioners say. Akagi was mildly proud of her.

Both of their ears instinctively turned and tracked the sound of footsteps approaching up the hallway. They weren't extremely heavy, but they were anything but graceful. Whoever it was, they weren't a person of war or discipline. Both Akagi and Kaga were confused, as the list of people who could enter their territory was very selective, and very short. The person knocked and opened the door.

It was Kashino, the munition ship. A transport, of course. She carried a set of wooden boxes, as well as an electronic tablet on top of them. Suddenly behind her walked Nagato, who'd cleverly masked her footsteps behind Kashino's. Both Akagi and Kaga silently commended the fellow clever fox.

Kashino said, "Good day Akagi-sama, Kaga-sama. Mail call, as well as a phone call with Shinano-sama. Miss Nagato also wishes to speak with you."

Kaga said, "If I knew this many people were coming, I would've prepared tea."

Kashino replied, "Oh, I have some brewing already. It's a new shipment from the Empery. They grow very fine tea."

Kaga shrugged and said, "I suppose we can give them that. Thank you very much. You are dismissed."

Kashino dropped the packages off, which made a resounding thump against the wood floor, as if they carried cinderblocks. Nagato seemed a little shocked, as she'd seen Kashino carry them around the military base without any sign of exertion. Kashino bowed and left the room. Nagato remained and entered. She commented, "I can read your faces. The poor girl is not a ship of war, such as us. We should expect effort from her, but not much discipline."

Kaga commented, "The merchant marine is still a part of the Sakura Empire navy, and should be held to the same standards."

"You cannot expect her to find victory against anything larger than a patrol boat."

Akagi interjected, "She is a munition ship that transports munitions. Anything past that is trivial. Nagato, what brings you to our room today?"

Nagato replied, "Oh, I and Shinano are here to speak with you in a few minutes. If I could only get this confounded device to work… Ah, here we are."

She turned the tablet around and propped it up against the wall. It displayed only the upper half of Shinano's head and the ceiling. Nagato sat for a moment, but then said, "Shinano, we are here."

Shinano snorted, and one blue eye opened. She adjusted herself in her seat and the camera as well. "Mmmmm, yes. Apologies. The rain makes me quite drowsy."

Nagato chuckled, "I understand quite completely. I have a tree I enjoy sleeping under. Sadly, I sometimes miss responsibilities because of this, most likely because 'We simply cannot awaken Nagato-sama from her slumber'."

Shinano chuckled, "Oh yes, I know that very well. I should ask the younger ones to help me create an alarm on my phone."

"It can be an alarm as well? Astounding. Truthfully, it was not so long ago that I learned simply how to use the telephone function."

Kaga eventually lost her patience and said, "How may we help you?"

Both of the elders stopped their conversation and Shinano said, "You are about to receive a call. We will then need to speak about it."

"What do you-"

Just then, Akagi's communicator rang. Nagato quietly said, "Please put the call on speakerphone. I wish to hear as well."

Akagi did so, and said, "Hello?"

Taihou's voice spread throughout the room. "Akagi, I have an interesting situation I need to talk to you about. Are you alone?"

Akagi looked around the room. Shinano and Kaga made no signs, but Nagato motioned for her to continue.

"Yes. Yes, I am."

"Good. How would you feel like us puppeting… a country?"

Akagi made a look of deep surprise to both Shinano and Nagato, but said, "Context."

Taihou laughed and said, "Well, it all started with a rather loose interpretation of our orders…"

[===================================]

Enterprise entered her room after a long day. She'd spent most of the day talking, which was her worst skill. Her original idea of making herself indispensable, so she'd be out at sea most of the time, had apparently fallen through. Now, she felt she spent that time on land. However, the commander had promised that there would be a mission for her soon. She remembered the mention of the polar regions. The Parliamenters were perpetually happy, but a pain to work with. She hung her hat and coat on the hangers near the door.

Smallie, sorry, Little E, was already inside. She sat on her temporary inflatable mattress while drawing, but looked a little worried. Enterprise was already poor at interpersonal interaction with adults. Children were even more of an enigma. Neither of them had asked for this, but Akashi had already been given a thumping. Regardless, it was universally agreed upon that someone had to take care of the child, and everyone(including herself) agreed that Big E seemed to be the most appropriate. If Enterprise couldn't be there, then she often handed Little E to her sisters, like Hornet or Yorktown. One was in Central America and the other was with the Sakura. What to do now? It was much past her bedtime, so why was she up? How to ask?

Grim solved this by taking off from Enterprise's shoulder. He flapped his way over to Little E's bed and landed next to it. Enterprise remembered being worried that Grim wouldn't like her, but the opposite happened.

Little E looked up and said, "Hey Grimmy" and scratched under his chin. The big bird inspected Little E, then her drawing, and then walked off to his bed. She then looked up to Enterprise and said "Hi, sis. What'd you do today?"

Enterprise said, "We just talked. We do a lot of talking."

"Talk about what?"

"Well, rebuilding the harbor. Then, we spoke about an expedition up north. Apparently the sirens are hiding interesting things in the arctic. Northern Parliament are good fighters, but very poor at communication. I may have to go there."

"...Does that mean you'll be gone for a long time? Can I come?"

"I… don't know. It could be a few months. Since the polar regions are less charted territory, you'll have to stay here. You have exercises, after all."

Little E was quiet for a bit, then asked, "Are the sirens gonna win?"

Enterprise had no real answer to that. It was almost impossible to judge them and then compare strength. However, she realized that this wasn't what Little E needed to hear. She said, "Of course not. Now, the whole world's against them."

"Oh, okay."

Little E, while tucked in, still looked anxious. She asked, "Can you read me a story? I saw something where a mom read from a book. I don't have one, but can you?"

Enterprise looked around for anything that she felt would work. She had no idea how reading was supposed to help her sleep. There was nothing around. She said, "I can't see anything you'd like."

"Please?"

Enterprise, at her wit's end, grabbed the nearest book she could find. She walked over to the mattress, sat down on the floor and opened the book to a random page. She inhaled, and began dramatically reading.

"Depth Charges: Mark Six and Mark Seven. Chapter one, part ten: Firing and safety features, section fifteen. A safe setting lock prevents the shock of gunfire, bomb hits, or underwater explosions from moving the index pointer off the SAFE setting. This lock consists of a short piece of No. 19 (".0358 dia.) copper wire rove through holes in lug of the index pointer and wrench stop. The ends of the wire are twisted together. The index pointer is thereby secured in the SAFE position and cannot be moved until the wire is broken. Round nose pliers, furnished in service tools sets, are used to install the wire. It is not necessary to remove the locking wire to change the index pointer from SAFE to a particular depth setting."

Enterprise looked from the manual to see her smaller counterpart fast asleep. She'd successfully bored someone into unconsciousness in less than a minute. Or maybe, she'd actually successfully cared for someone. She looked around for acknowledgement, but the only person watching was Grim. He, however, stared back. It was almost like he'd been watching the entire time and was trying his best to get some point across. Enterprise felt she knew what he was trying to say. After all, he knew her better than anyone.