Vee could faintly hear the conversation that Luz was having with her mother. She didn't want to interrupt, and she didn't want to eavesdrop, but she certainly couldn't help but hear how emotional both of them were getting.
And as she stood there, watching Luz's image fade into the rain-obscured sky, watching as Camila began to weep openly, she couldn't help but feel a tremendous guilt on her conscience.
I've been lying to this woman for months. She thought I was her daughter... she treated me with so much kindness and love, and I deceived her. And now she knows everything.
Vee trembled as she watched Camila finally turn back toward her and the house. Their eyes met. Camila said nothing, at least not right away. Vee reached out to her, her hand trembling. Then, she let it slump to her side.
"Vee, I... I think we should go inside," said Camila quietly, gently gesturing for the basilisk to follow her in. Vee could sense the magic from the card she'd just eaten coursing through her body, but she didn't transform... not yet. She didn't know if she'd ever take Luz's appearance again.
I guess there's no need now that Camila knows who I really am, thought Vee. Her head was slumped like Camila's as she followed the woman inside, closing the door behind them both. She looked up again and saw Camila, her own head still slumped, heaving a long sigh. "...Camila?"
"Hmm?" Camila replied. Despite her sadness, she tried to put on her best face for her guest, and a small but uncertain smile crossed her lips. "Is everything all right, Vee?"
"Camila, I... I..." Vee's voice was trembling as she spoke. "I'm so sorry!"
Before Camila could say anything else, Vee had begun sobbing. Camila let out a small gasp, moving forward to comfort her, but Vee turned away.
"Camila, I'm sorry about everything! I spent months tricking you into believing I was Luz... I let you think I was your own daughter... I've been lying to you this whole time, and you... you learned everything I did and you still saved me! I don't deserve it... you risked your life to save me from that guy, after I did the worst thing anyone could ever do to a mother! I hurt you so much, and I... I... I..."
As Vee continued to sob, Camila placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. She looked at Vee with the same love and understanding that she displayed when she saw Vee in that cage back at the historical society, and when Vee looked up and saw the love in Camila's eyes, it comforted her, but at the same time, made her feel even worse, knowing that she was being shown all this love she didn't think she deserved.
"Vee, I'm not mad at you for what you did, I understand completely," said Camila, softly squeezing Vee's shoulder. "You were alone, and afraid, and you didn't know what to do..."
"But it doesn't excuse all the lying I did," Vee replied, still unable to fully look Camila in the eyes. "How can you forgive me so easily?"
"Because there's nothing to forgive," said Camila. "When I first learned that you weren't really Luz, I was upset with you... but only for a moment, only when I believed that you might have had something to do with Luz being in that other realm. But when Luz explained it to me, and I looked into your eyes, I didn't see a liar or a deceiver. I saw a scared little child who needed my help... and who I would do anything to protect. I meant what I said to you before. You are a kind, helpful, strong girl... no different from any human child. You might be different on the outside, but in here..."
Camila put her hand to her heart.
"In here you are the same as me and Luz."
"Camila..." whispered Vee. She'd begun shaking softly from the moment Camila started speaking to her, and as she searched for something to say to show her appreciation, Camila knelt down to meet her on eye level.
"And you know what? I've enjoyed the time I've spent with you. If you hadn't shown up, these past few months would've been the most agonizing of my life... but you came and showed me the same love and warmth as my wonderful Luz, and even though no one could ever replace her in my heart, you have brought me comfort... then and now. I'm glad you were here. I'm still glad you're here."
Vee sniffled and gasped softly, and she allowed herself a smile as more tears came down her face. Camila smiled back, and stood back up.
"I just... I don't know why my daughter would want to leave," said Camila. "She said it was never me, but... what else could it be? The bullying at school? Her teachers? I... I've tried so hard, and I know she still loves me, but... she prefers a demon realm over me..."
Vee shivered, pained by the sadness in Camila's voice. Such a kind woman, such a good mother... Vee still held some resentment at Luz for leaving, even if she was starting to understand why Luz did, and even if she was grateful that Luz had helped save her. She followed Camila over to the couch, and sat down next to her.
"Maybe it was the camp?" said Vee, remembering her trip to Camp Reality Check earlier that summer. "I mean... I had a good time... I'm glad I went, because it helped me learn a lot about the human realm, but there were a lot of kids there who weren't very happy. By the end pretty much everyone was having a good time, but maybe Luz was just worried about going?"
"Maybe," Camila said, sighing softly. "I did spring it on her so quickly, and we never really talked about it more than me insisting that she go, but even so..."
Camila's mind raced as she thought about all the other times she felt she didn't support Luz enough. She had always appreciated Luz's creativity, and tried her best to understand her daughter's habits and quirks, but maybe she'd missed something, maybe she'd said something that she didn't think much about but that stuck with Luz? Vee started thinking as well, trying to figure out a way to comfort the woman she'd grown to love, the only parent she'd ever had, the first person who'd ever treated her as something more than an experiment to use and throw away.
Camila, you're such a good mom, you can't beat yourself up like this... Luz just doesn't understand you! No, that's silly, of course Luz understands you, she's lived with you so much longer than I have... oh, why do I have to be so bad at this?
"Maybe she met someone on the Boiling Isles that she cares about as much as I care about you?" said Vee. "I mean... not that she doesn't care about you, but... someone had to be helping her there, right?"
"She did tell me that she made some friends, a witch and a demon and an owl, but she was talking really fast because she was worried about you," said Camila, looking back at Vee. "But I'm supposed to be her mother, I can't believe she'd find someone she loves that much!"
Vee gasped, realizing that what she'd said had just made Camila even more sad. She shook her head, trying to make the thought leave Camila's mind.
"Just people helping her, that's all! No one special, just a magic teacher maybe, or a friend, or...!"
"Oh, Vee, it's all right," said Camila, wiping a tear from her eye. "I know what you mean, I know Luz hasn't replaced me with anyone... and... I am glad someone's looking out for her... at least, I hope they are. I'm so worried about her... I love her so much and I just want her to be okay."
Vee tried to think of anything else that could reassure Camila that Luz was all right, but her memories of the Boiling Isles weren't all that reassuring. Life as one of Belos' experiments was all she'd ever known, that and life as a wanderer with no friends or family. The Boiling Isles had been a nightmare for her, but she knew it wasn't like that for everyone, and she certainly knew it wasn't like that for Luz.
"...she'll be okay," said Vee, reaching over and taking Camila's hand. "She's really brave and strong, I could tell. I know she'll come back soon."
"Thank you, Vee," Camila replied, tenderly squeezing Vee's hand. "This is all so completely... everything I ever know is different now... when I woke up this morning, I thought you were Luz and I knew that magic and demons and other worlds didn't exist. Now, when I go to sleep, even if I can sleep... I just want Luz to come home. That's all I want right now..."
All Vee wanted to do was comfort Camila, but there was nothing she could say right now that would do that. She loved Camila, with all her heart, but she wasn't her daughter, and now Camila knew that too. What right did she have to tell her she loved her? What right did she have to keep trying to be something she wasn't?
"I can teach you about magic, and the Boiling Isles... as much as I know, anyway," said Vee. "I spent most of my life locked up, so I didn't really get to see the outside all that much, and when I did, I was on the run... but I'll teach you as much as I can, I promise."
Camila looked into Vee's eyes again. She saw sadness, but behind the sadness, there was trauma... deep, lingering trauma. She'd treated abused animals dozens, hundreds of times. Abused humans were no different, and Vee was no different either. She didn't know what Luz had been told, but she knew Vee had been hurt, and despite the overwhelming grief she was feeling about Luz, she desperately needed to be there for Vee.
"Oh, Vee... I'm so sorry about everything you've gone through," said Camila. "I've dealt with animals locked in cages before, but you're no animal, you're a person... a wonderful, amazing person with so much love and kindness in your heart. Before you met me, did you ever meet anyone you felt close to?"
Vee shook her head. Camila was the first and only.
"You can tell me what happened to you when you're ready," said Camila. "I know it must not be a pleasant memory to go back to, and I know being in that cage in that awful man's office must have brought back so much trauma."
Vee nodded, and more tears slid down her face, tears that Camila wiped away.
"I... I won't turn into Luz anymore," said Vee. "I know it would probably hurt now, and... I won't lie to you anymore."
"It's almost time for school to start back up, and I'm sure they'll be expecting Luz there," said Camila. "But you can change into anything you'd like, Vee. It's entirely up to you what you become. Whatever makes you comfortable. You don't have to change for me at all. I can come up with a reason why Luz won't be at school for a while... but if you like transforming into her, you may. I know my Luz will come back to me soon."
Camila, of course, didn't know when or if Luz would ever come back. She could hope, and she could pray, and she tried her best to be optimistic, but in the meantime, Luz was gone, and she had to try her best to get through in the face of her new reality. She had someone else who needed her now.
"Camila..."
"...you can call me mama if you'd like," said Camila, smiling warmly at Vee.
"...thank you... mama."
Vee then stood up and started to walk away. As she did, she could hear Camila begin to sob. She turned, and saw that Camila was as sad as ever. Hearing that word again reminded her of Luz, and though she tried not to show her pain, it came out anyway, and memories of Luz began to fill her mind. Camila wept, clutching her arms tightly to her chest, and shaking as tears flooded down her face.
Mama...
Vee sat down next to Camila again and reached out to hug her, her own eyes now full of tears. Camila looked up and immediately moved forward, embracing Vee as Vee embraced her. Vee began to sob with her, her mind flooding with the trauma she'd endured earlier that night and all the trauma she'd endured in her life. Now that she could no longer hide behind her disguise, now that she was Vee again, she couldn't escape the memories, of being trapped inside that cell, of being starved and forced to drain magic from the rats that scurried by.
And as Vee thought of Camila, she couldn't help but think that she still didn't deserve her love.
"Vee," Camila sobbed, looking into her eyes as they continued to embrace, "I promise, no one will ever hurt you again."
"Mama..." Vee sobbed again, hugging Camila as tightly as she could and burying her face in her shoulder. I love you so much... and I know I don't deserve your love back...
"Vee..." Camila whispered back to her, caressing her tenderly and talking through her tears. "You are a wonderful girl and I am so glad to be part of your life... thank you for being part of mine."
Vee could no longer speak. She was sobbing so hard and shaking so much that she couldn't form a coherent sentence... and she could only hope that Camila understood how much she appreciated the gift she'd been given.
All I wanted to do was live... thought Vee, her sobbing momentarily paused as she let out a quiet gasp of relief. And now you've given me a reason to.