Mending
Author's Note: Well, parts of this were written for Whumpay and Angstpril this year. Lol. I love fics which discuss the aftermath of the Deception arc, and I honestly think this is one of the more painful things I've written... Enjoy! :D
~ Amina Gila
"Another fine mess we've gotten into," Anakin mutters under his breath once the dust and smoke have begun to settle, and he manages to stop coughing. He ignites his lightsaber to give them some light to see with. This entire mission was a trap from the beginning, and they walked right into it. The Separatist base on this planet was never abandoned. They didn't have a chance to get any information. The second they'd reached the control room, the entire building had exploded, and now, they're buried in the rubble, hoping they don't get killed.
Ahsoka sighs next to him as she sits up. All three of them are mostly uninjured thankfully, but they're still trapped in here. Frankly, Anakin thinks he would much rather face a furious, hungry Krayt dragon alone than be stuck in here with Obi-Wan. They've hardly spoken with one another since the Hardeen incident scarcely a month ago. Anakin is still hurt and angry and he doesn't want to deal with his former master. So maybe he won't. He can simply ignore his existence. It's not as if they have any chance of digging themselves out of here anyhow.
"Well," Ahsoka declares with far too much cheer in her voice – and Anakin notices that she's also carefully avoiding looking at Obi-Wan – as she eyes the giant piece of durasteel which is inclined over them, giving them some protection from being crushed. "I guess we'll have to wait until Rex and the boys can dig us out."
Anakin huffs, tapping his comm. "Rex, come in," he calls, but all he hears is static.
"We're too far underground for them to hear," Obi-Wan informs him. "Either that, or our comms are being jammed." He swipes at a cut on his forehead. Anakin pretends not to hear or notice.
"Rex, come in," he says again, knowing even as he does that Obi-Wan is probably right. "Oh, great, he's not answering."
No one says anything to that, and Anakin suddenly realizes how awkward the silence is. It never used to be this way, and he hates it. He hates that he can no longer trust Obi-Wan to protect him the way he used it. He hates that he can only rely on Ahsoka and Rex – and the 501st, of course – to watch his back. But Obi-Wan made his choice, and he didn't choose Anakin.
"Do you think we could lift something with the Force to try and get out?" Ahsoka queries.
"No," answers Obi-Wan before Anakin has a chance, "Everything is far too precarious right now. More than likely, it would bring everything crashing down on us, and we'd be buried."
Anakin can feel the tightly wound coil of anger within him begin to burn brighter. He almost wants to intentionally use the Force, because Obi-Wan just advised against it, but he's not willing to put Ahsoka at risk. "We could try," he says instead, looking at his Padawan.
In the dim blue glow, he can see the uncertainty flicker across her face. Deliberately turning away from Obi-Wan, Anakin reaches out with the Force, cautiously testing the structure around them. "Anakin, don't," his former master warns.
Still, Anakin ignores him. He knows it's unkind and petty, but he thinks that his resentment is justifiable. A dark part of him wants Obi-Wan to hurt as much as he's hurting. It's not Jedi-like, but he doesn't know how to stop it. Maybe – Maybe if the situation was different, if he was feeling like this towards someone else, he would go to Obi-Wan for help. But there's no use wishing. He moves to the pile of rubble closest him, prodding it carefully with his mechanical hand, lightsaber held in his flesh one.
Something shifts, and he jerks back as more debris tumbles down into their space. He flinches at the noise, ducking aside as a chuck of duracrete falls right where his head just was. Well, it's no use getting them killed down here. With a groan of irritation, Anakin drops down on the dusty ground next to Ahsoka.
"You okay, Snips?"
She coughs and nods. "I'm fine, Master." Her eyes flick towards Obi-Wan for a moment, but she quickly looks away again. Anakin can almost feel her uncertainty and anger through their bond, and it's like an echo of his own.
"It won't take Rex long to find us," he assures her.
"I know," she agrees, shifting to find a more comfortable position.
Anakin knows that it's harsh to give Obi-Wan the silent treatment like this, but he doesn't know what he'd even say to him. What is there to say anyways? So, he says nothing, and they sit in silence, dust and smoke thick in the air, making breathing hard. He stifles a cough, wishing that there was something they could do other than sit here.
He doesn't know how long it's been, though it feels like it's been hours; it has been a while. He still doesn't hear any sounds to indicate that someone is digging for them, and that's disturbing. Anakin can only hope that they won't run out of oxygen before they're found – suffocation is not how he wants to die – and that the 501st is alright. He doesn't hear any blaster fire or feel lives being snuffed out all around him, so maybe there is no ambush. Maybe this was simply meant as a deathtrap for them, and the Separatists haven't arrived to clean up the mess. Or maybe they're meant to die down here in the ruins. No, he won't let that happen.
"Anakin," Obi-Wan says again, and Anakin just barely holds back a snarl. Why can he not understand that Anakin doesn't want to talk to him? "You can't keep doing this." He sounds resigned and maybe a little pained. Anakin tries not to let it affect him.
Ahsoka deflates next to him, and when he looks at her, she's staring at Obi-Wan wordlessly, expression silently accusing. "Try me," snaps Anakin, crossing his arms and pressing closer to Ahsoka. It's borderline cruel to rub his current closeness with Ahsoka in Obi-Wan's face, but he doesn't care. He doesn't know what he can do; he only wants it to stop hurting.
Obi-Wan sighs heavily. "It's making everything on our missions harder," he points out.
"Oh. Really. So, that's why you care," Anakin bites back coldly. He extinguishes his lightsaber, plunging them all into darkness. It's never anything personal. It's just that Obi-Wan puts the mission, the Republic before anyone else. Maybe some part of him always knew that was the case, but it hurts. Is he really so worthless that no one will ever care about him just a little more than whatever they're working for?
"Anakin, that's not what I meant." Obi-Wan's voice is firm and unyielding with maybe the slightest bit of frustration leaking through.
"Do you really want to do this now?" Anakin demands sharply. "With Ahsoka here?"
"It would have happened eventually," Ahsoka mutters. "You might as well get it over with while we're here, because it could be some time." He can feel her discomfort, though she's hiding it well. "Yes, I'm still mad, but…" Her voice trails off, and she sighs with resignation. "In the end, there's nothing I can do but accept it."
Anakin wishes he could have that attitude. He doesn't even know how to go about getting to that point. It was different for him than for Ahsoka because he knew Obi-Wan longer. They were far closer than she was with Obi-Wan or even him. And Anakin knows that they're right, that he and Obi-Wan do need to have this conversation. It is affecting their ability to work together, but he'd thought – hoped – that his former master would… what? Admit that he cared? Acknowledge that he shouldn't have done it? Anakin doesn't really know what he's looking for… just not what Obi-Wan is offering. He doesn't want excuses.
"Ahsoka is right," Obi-Wan's voice is level. "We need to talk about this at some point, and if not now, when? You've been avoiding it for weeks."
"Because there's nothing to talk about!" Anakin exclaims with frustration.
"You and I both know that's not true," his former master replies dryly.
"It is," Anakin insists. "You decided to take the mission, when you could have refused or told me, instead of leaving me in the dark."
"I had no choice!" Obi-Wan somehow manages to sound hurt and annoyed at the same time. Anakin tries not to let it affect him. "The Council unanimously decided that it would be best for me to take the role. I couldn't refuse."
"You could have told me, told us!" Anakin yells at him, fury and pain sweeping away all logic and leaving him feeling completely raw and exposed. He hates it.
"But I didn't," Obi-Wan counters, "And I regret it deeply. There is nothing either of us can do to change the past."
Anakin scowls. He said the same thing previously when he apologized, but it's not enough. "I hope you aren't expecting me to forgive you," he states flatly, "Because that's not happening. You used me. You. I thought you were better than that." He knows that his words will hurt, and a dark part of him is viciously satisfied. Good. Let him know how much it hurt.
Obi-Wan doesn't answer the bitter, hurtful words, and Anakin feels a dark vindication, even as tears flood his eyes. Normally, he would force them away, but now, in the safety of the darkness, overwhelmed by more pain than he knows how to deal with, he lets them fall. He shouldn't be like this; he should be able to let go, but… he can't. His emotions have always been so much more overwhelming than what everyone else seems to face, maybe because of his strong Force sensitivity, he doesn't know.
He's not as angry about Obi-Wan choosing to fake his death and go on the mission as he is about the fact that he was being used, as if he's no better than – than a slave. Obi-Wan never apologized for that, and okay, maybe it was safer for him to keep Anakin in the dark, but why make excuses instead of apologizing? That's why he's upset. What's so hard about apologizing for making Anakin grieve and think him dead, even if it was necessary? Why can Obi-Wan not assure him that, despite his actions, he still cares about Anakin?
"I didn't mean to make you feel that way," Obi-Wan says softly, a hint of remorse in his voice, when he finally speaks a few minutes later.
Anakin makes a face, viciously swiping away his tears. His voice is level when he replies, betraying no evidence of his momentary loss of composure. "I'm not the only one you made feel like that." There's a quiet rebuke in the words, and he glance pointedly at Ahsoka, even if no one can see in the darkness which still surrounds them in the ruins. "And nor does it change the fact that you did it."
Nothing could hide the resentment in his voice, or the truth of it ringing in the Force. He had trusted Obi-Wan with his heart and his life, and his former master betrayed him. Obi-Wan took that trust and cast it aside as if it meant nothing to him, as if he could simply treat Anakin as nothing more than tool. Ahsoka too, but it's not as hard for her to move past what happened, seeing as she was never a slave. When Anakin was freed by Qui-Gon and became Obi-Wan's Padawan, it took him so long to accept that the Jedi would never handle him as an object to be used and cast aside the way his slave masters had.
Or so he'd thought.
Maybe he was never really free. Maybe the chains holding him in bondage had changed to the point where he could no longer see them. Maybe he's been deluding himself into thinking that he could ever be something more, something better, something other than what he's been since childhood. Obi-Wan used him. He clamps his jaw closed, smothering the sob before it can escape. He doesn't want Obi-Wan or Ahsoka to hear, to know how weak he is. His sister would never think of him like that; she understands, but his former master obviously doesn't.
Did he think that Anakin could let it go so easily? After he mourned for days, wishing that he'd been better so Obi-Wan hadn't taken the shot? After he contemplated innumerable ways to end his existence, only refraining because of Ahsoka and Padme? No. Some things can never be forgiven.
Tears slip freely down his face again, and he's unable to stop them no matter how much he tries. There's a reason he's been working himself to the ground. If he stops, he thinks, and he can't bear the path his mind always takes when it has the liberty to do so. He doesn't think he's projecting, but Ahsoka shifts closer, curling against his side and sliding an arm around his waist. He selfishly takes the comfort, pulling her into an embrace as he struggles to get himself under control once more. Why did Obi-Wan have to get stuck down here with them? He would have been perfectly content with only Ahsoka's company.
Anakin senses more than sees Obi-Wan moving closer. "Can I –?" he begins, and Anakin is fairly certain that he won't be able to tolerate being any nearer Obi-Wan than he already is.
"Stay away from me," he hisses venomously, well aware that Obi-Wan can hear the emotion in his voice. He hates himself for being weak enough to still hurt from the betrayal. Ahsoka presses closer, as if she can be a physical shield against the pain in his heart. She can't stop it, but he loves her for wanting to. Her fierce loyalty obviously came from him – Obi-Wan doesn't seem capable of it or why…? He cuts off the thought before it can take root.
"We have to resolve this somehow," Obi-Wan answers, sounding pained.
"It can be resolved by you staying away," Anakin snaps, though there's little heat in his tone anymore. He doesn't really mean that either. He wants the opposite – he doesn't want Obi-Wan to leave; a second rejection would destroy him – but he's unable to open himself up, to make himself vulnerable again so soon.
Obi-Wan shifts again, and it sounds as if he settles against the debris behind him. "I'm sorry," he murmurs, and he means it. The Force echoes with his sincerity, but it doesn't really matter. Anakin thought he knew how Obi-Wan felt, but obviously he'd been wrong. He can't expose himself like that again. And he doesn't even know what Obi-Wan is apologizing for.
He swallows, blinking past his tears and staring fixedly at a point in the dark. "So am I," he whispers lowly, though he doesn't know entirely for what. If he could leave right now, he would, and he'd try not to look back, at least not for a while, while the pain is still so sharp.
Ahsoka suddenly perks up, heading tilting. "Do you hear that?" she asks quietly. "They're digging. I can hear them."
Anakin reaches out with the Force to enhance his hearing, picking up the faintest sound of shifting rubble. Force, how deeply are they buried? "Yes," he replies at the same time as Obi-Wan. There's an awkward pause before he breaks it. "We must be buried deeply. We're lucky we weren't crushed."
"I agree," Obi-Wan comments, and Anakin can hear him pushing a button on his comm. "This is General Kenobi. Can you hear me?" Silence and static greet him.
"Oh great," Ahsoka mutters sarcastically. "Let's hope they don't accidentally kill us when they're trying to rescue us. If they move one wrong piece, we'll be flattened."
"Comforting," Anakin says dryly, arms still wound around her. Now that there's something for him to focus on, he's able to bury his emotions deep inside of him where they won't be a problem. He tries his comm again as the sounds of digging come closer. Still nothing.
It takes him at least ten or fifteen minutes before the debris has been moved enough that the commlink signal gets through. "Rex, come in," Anakin calls for what feels like the hundredth time. And who knows? Maybe it is.
"General! Are you alright?" Rex sounds relieved, a feeling to which Anakin definitely relates.
"We're all fine," he reports, "But be careful. Some of the debris is extremely precarious, and it could come crashing down on us at any time if it's moved wrong."
"Roger that," Rex replies, and Anakin senses more than hears Rex giving orders to his men who are trying to dig them out.
"Any Separatist activity?" Anakin questions. He certainly hopes not. It would be so frustrating for them to be trapped in here while their men are fighting alone outside.
"There have been a few droid patrols," Rex informs him. "We got held up coming here, but they didn't see us."
"Be careful," cautions Obi-Wan, speaking into his own wrist comm presumably. "This was clearly a trap, and we still don't know who it was for. We might have walked right into it."
Much as Anakin hates to admit it, Obi-Wan has a point. He chooses to say nothing, waiting in silence for another few minutes, until the ground beneath them shakes. There's a flare of panic and surprise in the Force, and Anakin reopens the link to Rex. "Rex, come in, what's happening?" he demands.
"Vulture droids," the captain answers, another explosion echoing in the background. "We'll have to retreat. We don't have the forces to hold them off."
"Pull back," Anakin orders. "If they hit this rubble, we'll be buried. Get reinforcements."
"Yes, sir," Rex answers, before the line goes silent again, presumably as he gives orders to the men. Anakin casts out with the Force, wincing when he feels lives being snuffed out. The Force shrills a warning, and he throws himself over Ahsoka, who is still leaning next to him, as they take a direct hit. Predictably, everything comes collapsing down on top of them. Anakin feels something sharp dig into his side as something else hits his head. He struggles against the darkness pulling him under, before finally slipping into unconsciousness.
**w**
Obi-Wan tries to breathe through the dust clouding the air. They don't have much longer, not now that they hardly have any room to move. "Anakin!" he calls desperately, trying to see through the darkness. "Ahsoka?" Silence greets him, and he nearly panics. His lightsaber is, thankfully, still clipped to his belt, so he presses closer to the duracrete at his back, grateful that he's still conscious and able to move, probably because of the durasteel over him.
He ignites the blade, a blue glow filling the area. The small space across from him where Anakin and Ahsoka were sitting is now almost entirely caved in. Obi-Wan can see them lying there, seemingly unconscious; they're far too still, and it makes him fear for how badly they're injured. They have to be alright. Maybe if he had insisted on working out their differences and disagreements after the Hardeen incident this wouldn't have happened. They would have stayed beside him where it was safer instead of being in the area where everything collapsed.
The guilt hits him sharply, but Obi-Wan ignores it, using the Force to move some of the rubble covering Anakin. He's clearly in worse shape, because he was covering Ahsoka with his body when everything came crashing down on them. Digging into the debris beside him, Obi-Wan wedges his lightsaber into the gap, using the Force to ensure it remains ignited, so he'll have two hands to pull Anakin and Ahsoka to a safer place. He doesn't know if the vulture droids will come back, but it's better to be safe than sorry.
Obi-Wan moves Anakin first. His body is completely limp, face pale and exhausted. Has he been sleeping properly? Obi-Wan doesn't even know. They've not spent much – any – time together since it happened. Once Anakin is lying propped up against the duracrete beside Obi-Wan, he pulls Ahsoka into his lap. There isn't enough room for all three of them over here, but they should be mostly secure – unless the Separatists bomb the destroyed base again, that is.
"Ahsoka?" he tries again, searching her for injuries with the Force. Other than a few bruises and cuts, she's alright. She must have hit her head. "Can you hear me?" he questions.
Ahsoka moans weakly but doesn't otherwise stir or give any indication that she's regaining consciousness, so he sends a tendril of the Force to her mind, urging her to wake up. They need to tend to Anakin, a difficult feat when Ahsoka's unconscious in his arms. They could have, should have done so many things differently, and Obi-Wan can't shake the sensation that this is somehow his fault.
It takes a few seconds before Ahsoka's eyes flutter open, and she blinks blearily up at him. "Master Kenobi?" she mumbles, sounding somewhat confused. "What…?" She lifts up her head, glancing around. Her eyes widen when they fall on Anakin's form. "Oh."
"Are you alright?" Obi-Wan queries worriedly as she scoots out of his arms and maneuvers herself to Anakin's other side, quite an impressive feat, if he's being honest. Obi-Wan reaches out, carefully readjusting Anakin's position so he's leaning against him. He runs his fingers through Anakin's hair, searching for any head injuries while scanning his body with the Force.
"Yes, yes, I'll be fine," she assures him quickly. The lack of curtness in her voice is a clear indication that she's worried about Anakin. "Will he be alright?"
The only major injuries are a minor concussion and a piece of durasteel lodged in his side. That's not good. They can't pull it out since they have no way to staunch the bleeding but leaving it there could be just as dangerous. They need to get out of this rubble. "Yes, eventually," Obi-Wan answers motioning to Anakin's side. "Be careful of his side. He's injured."
Ahsoka reaches out, fingers touching his arm lightly. "Master, wake up," she whispers.
Anakin remains still and motionless between them, and Obi-Wan, despite his fear, suddenly realized just how much he's missed these moments, the moments where Anakin trusted him entirely, enough to let him hold him like this when injured. If he were conscious, there's no way he wouldn't be protesting violently unless he was injured to the point that he no longer cared. He made a mistake, and he has to make things right.
"Anakin," Obi-Wan urges, reaching out to his former Padawan's mind with the Force. "Anakin, you need to wake up." There's a small cut on the side of his head which is bleeding badly, as all head wounds do, matting his blonde hair with blood.
Finally, finally, Anakin shifts slightly, his Force signature slowly becoming more alert as he struggles back to consciousness. "'Soka?" His voice is almost inaudible, his mind presumably drawing up the last things that happened before he went unconscious.
"I'm right here," Ahsoka answers, squeezing his arm. "I'm fine, thanks to you."
"Ugh," groans Anakin, slowly opening his eyes though they're still unfocused. "M'head hurts."
"You have a concussion," Obi-Wan informs him. "Don't move too much."
Anakin hardly even seems to hear him, squeezing his eyes closed again, and Obi-Wan realizes that he's still unaware of where he is – or more precisely, he's unaware of the fact that Obi-Wan is holding him. It stings briefly, but the hurt is as much pain as it is guilt, so he lets it go. At least Anakin is finally awake again.
**w**
Sensations filter in incredibly slowly, maybe due, in part, to his head injury. His head is throbbing relentlessly, and he shifts, trying to find a more comfortable position. Fuzzy memories make themselves clear as everything slowly floods back into his mind. Anakin's eyes fly open when he remembers where he is and what was happening. They'd been trapped in the ruins of a Separatist base, and now that he actually thinks about it, he recognizes the person he's lying on. Obi-Wan. Of course.
He jerks upright, wincing when his head spins. The blue glow from Obi-Wan's lightsaber isn't bright enough to provide much illumination, but he realizes that he's between Obi-Wan and Ahsoka. "Steady," cautions Obi-Wan, tone filled with worry, as he touches Anakin's shoulder to steady him.
"Don't touch me!" Anakin tries to hiss, though it sounds more like a whine than anything else. He pulls away, inhaling carefully so as not to disturb his body any more than it already has been.
Obi-Wan folds his hands in his lap, a look of hurt flashing across his face, which quickly disappears. It doesn't do much about the fact that they're literally pressed side-by-side since they don't really have any room to move. Anakin glances at Ahsoka, trying to quell the brief stab of guilt. He knows he shouldn't be harsh to Obi-Wan; ignoring him is far easier and more effective.
Ahsoka is looking at him, something conflicted on her face. "What?" questions Anakin.
She sighs, eyes flicking away as she nudges at their bond through the Force. He lowers his shields enough for her to transmit a thought to him. "He is worried about you, Skyguy. I think we'll have to talk to him."
He doesn't want to. He doesn't want to drag up the hurts and insecurities. He doesn't want to dwell on the pain. But… Ahsoka isn't exactly wrong either. They do need to talk. Anakin simply doesn't know how to start. Avoidance of the issue is easier than dealing with it, especially for something this personal and emotional. "It's not that easy," he sends back, unable to prevent his pain from echoing through their bond.
Ahsoka looks sad, and she lays a hand on him, curling her fingers around his arm. "I know."
They can sit here and wait for the indefinite future, but Anakin is now all too aware of the fact that rescue might come too late. The 501st has likely retreated, leaving them completely alone in enemy territory, not that it matters, since they're buried in the ruins of the former Separatist base. It's only a matter of time before they run out of oxygen and die. He doesn't want to think like that, but reality is staring him in the face. Whatever rescue mission might be undertaken, might reach them to find only their bodies, or what's left of them.
"I think we'll have to face the possibility that the clones might not be able to reach us in time," Obi-Wan declare far too calmly – in Anakin's opinion – only minutes later.
"They will," Anakin hisses icily.
He feels Obi-Wan stiffen somewhat at the tone, and the guilt hits him even more strongly. "And if they don't, then we'll die down here." His words are slightly sharp, and they sting, but Anakin thinks he deserves it. It ignites a clawing panic inside of him because Obi-Wan and Ahsoka can't die. "I don't want us to die like this," his former master continues with determined stubbornness.
"Like what?" Anakin questions warily.
"Divided. Fighting each other," Obi-Wan elaborates. Anakin sees a discontent bordering on sadness flicker across his face, and he glances away unable to look at his former master anymore.
It's been hard for him to be constantly aggressive towards Obi-Wan, but the alternative is much harder. He doesn't know how to face his pain, his betrayal. He meets Ahsoka's eyes for a moment before she leans forwards. "I'm sorry, Master Obi-Wan," she says, and Anakin hears her genuine regret. "I'm – I know I haven't been very nice or understanding."
Anakin nearly chokes on air, before harshly reminding himself that Obi-Wan is not the enemy, that apologizing to and agreeing with him doesn't mean that she's betraying Anakin. For some reason, his mind doesn't want to accept that, and he crosses his arms tightly, trying to keep away the ache in his chest. He hates how much this is hurting him.
"It's alright, little one. I understand." Obi-Wan's voice is gentle, and Anakin instinctively knows that it's his turn to say something, but the words get stuck in his throat. He can't get them out, hard though he tries.
He can feel Obi-Wan's eyes on him, though he can't bring himself to move, especially not as his exhaustion catches up with him. "Anakin, look at me." He can't. There's a pause of silence, and then, Obi-Wan's hand is touching his chin, turning his head to force Anakin to meet his eyes. Despite the dimness in the area, Anakin can still see clearly enough the emotion in his former master's eyes. "I can't take back what's been done, even if I wish it," he says quietly.
Anakin finds that he simultaneously wants to push him away and hold onto him so he can never let go. "And do you?" His voice is so quiet that he hardly even hears himself.
Obi-Wan's hand slips from Anakin's chin to his cheek, cupping it. "Of course, I do. Did you think I would like the rift between us?"
It must be the darkness that's making Obi-Wan so much more willing to open up like this, because Anakin can't remember the last time it happened. He can feel the aching pain swelling, the longing for things to be the way they were, and this time, he knows that Obi-Wan shares the same feelings. He leans into the touch, blinking away tears, which silently escape down his face.
"I apologize for using your emotions like that," Obi-Wan murmurs softly.
He doesn't say anything else, doesn't give another inane excuse for his actions. It's a simple apology; it's what Anakin had wanted from the beginning. It was never about the lack of trust from the Jedi, though it hurts. It was never about being treated as though his emotions are meaningless. It was only ever about the knowledge that Obi-Wan used him, the way he'd been used when he was a slave, irrelevant unless he's of use. He couldn't simply let go of something like that, but now…
A strangled sob is torn from him, and he buries his face against Obi-Wan's shoulder, unable to stop shaking. "I'm sorry, Master," he chokes out through his tears. Anakin doesn't explain, but he doesn't need to, either. Obi-Wan understands.
His left hand clenches in Obi-Wan's robes, unwilling to release him. Obi-Wan only wraps his arms around him, holding him tightly and comfortingly, the way he did when Anakin was still young. It's a bit more awkward now, because Anakin isn't nearly as small as he used to be, but it's still comforting, and Anakin presses as close as he can, desperately craving the comfort he's been yearning for since everything feel apart.
"Anakin, you're like a brother to me, and I love you." Obi-Wan's voice is gentle and infinitely fond. "I never wanted to hurt you." He pauses slightly, before continuing. "I promise you, I'll never do anything like this again."
Anakin finds that he's having a hard time wrapping his mind around what Obi-Wan said, because he – he doesn't actually know what he thought with respect to Obi-Wan's feelings towards him. Just… not that. He reaches out to their bond, prodding at his former master's shields until he lets the outer layer down. It's enough for them to share emotions without being enough to accidentally transmit thoughts, and it allows him to feel Obi-Wan's love. He basks in it, soaking it up like a plant does the sun. He doesn't even hesitate, entwining their Force signatures together as tightly as he can.
He never wants this moment to end. "I love you too, Obi-Wan," he says fiercely, as if it's a promise, and maybe it is. They're unbeatable if they're together, especially if they're as close as they are now. Anakin can't even remember the last time the two of them were this close, but he likes it. It's comforting to be pressed up against Obi-Wan; it makes him feel safe, like he's finally home. Obi-Wan gestures with his hand and his lightsaber is extinguished. They don't need the light, not anymore.
"C'mere, Snips," Anakin offers, twisting so that she can join them. Ahsoka doesn't hesitate, scooting over, practically crawling into their laps so she can sit without being crushed into the debris. Anakin loops an arm around her waist, keeping her at his side while he clings desperately to Obi-Wan. "I love you also, 'Soka," he murmurs into the darkness.
"Took you two long enough to make up," she sighs, a hint of happiness flaring out into the Force, "And since we're all being sappy, I love both of you."
"And I love you too," Obi-Wan tells her, a hint of amusement in his voice.
"We are not – oh, whatever," grumbles Anakin, snuggling closer to his brother – father – and sister.
They remain there until Rex returns with the clones to finish digging them out, and though they're exhausted and a bit dizzy from lack of oxygen, they're still alive. The incident forged a bond between them, a bond which nothing could – or did – break. After Ahsoka was framed for the bombing of the Temple, they worked it out, finding the culprit, though not before she was expelled. They, of course, left with her.
Nearly a year later, when Palpatine revealed himself as Sidious, Anakin killed him along with Obi-Wan and Ahsoka. When all was said and done, they moved to Naboo – along with Padme – to raise Luke and Leia as part of a much larger clan, which included many of the clones from the 501st and 212th. Despite whatever the Jedi might say about attachments, Anakin knows that it was primarily a result of his bond with Obi-Wan which drove him to remain in Light and at his brother's, his father's side.
"We'll be fine as long as we stay together," Obi-Wan had said on Mortis. And he was right.
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