The Misadventures of Hyperdimension Peashy

Episode 16

by Derald Snyder

*Leanbox Army Base- Training Grounds*

"C'mon, you call that a punch? Put some oomph into it!"

Adrian's opponent growled as she cocked her fist, before thrusting forward as hard as she could... only for the soldier to easily catch it, before grabbing the girl around the neck and slamming her to the ground.

"You OK?" Adrian asked.

"I've endured worse pain than this," his opponent grunted.

"Alright, good. But you see how I did that? I lifted you up just enough to get you off balance, so I could put you flat on your back." He then released his grip, allowing the girl to stand up. "OK, now you try it."

"Um, but you're taller than me, petty officer..."

"Well then, improvise!" Adrian declared as he started swinging at his opponent, though he telegraphed them somewhat to allow her an opportunity.

The brunette hung back as she pondered her next move... then suddenly, she rushed forward, ducking under Adrian's punch before jumping and grabbing him around the neck, pulling them both to the ground. She then quickly climbed on him pinned his neck to the ground with her hand. "How was that?"

"OK, I guess..." Adrian grunted. "Wouldn't have have worked on a heavier opponent, though..." Abruptly he heaved her off, before pinning the girl to the ground by the shoulders. "Word of advice- make sure you're actually strong enough that the other guy stays pinned, got it?"

"OK," the girl giggled.

"AAADRIIAAAAAANNN!" another female voice cried out. The soldier looked up to see Peach, who had an absolutely devastated look on her face.

Then it clicked. He was laying on top of another girl- a cute one, at that.

He'd been smiling.

She'd been giggling.

"Oh no!" He quickly scrambled off his sparring partner. "Peashy, I swear, this isn't what it looks like!"

"Like *hell* it isn't!" Peach yelled back, tears welling up. "You no good, two-timing, dirty, rotten TRAITOR! I HATE YOU!" She immediately turned and ran off sobbing. "I never wanna see you again!"

"Peashy!" Adrian tried to run after her, but soon stopped, realizing it was futile. "Aw, man..." He put a hand behind his head in frustration. "Worst. Timing. Ever!"

"Uh-oh... that was your girlfriend, wasn't it?" the brunette asked.

"Yes," Adrian heaved a sigh. "I'm sorry, Keisha, but we're gonna have to cut this short. You might as well go home to Lastation..."

"O-okay... sorry about this," K-Sha bowed repentantly. "I hope you can get her to see reason..." With that, she turned and left...

*A short while later...*

"And that's what happened, Lisa," Adrian spoke to Peach's mother over the phone. "Honestly, if Peach had caught us in any other position, she might've seen that it was just a sparring session, nothing more..."

"I see," Lisa nodded. "But you know my daughter's never been the brightest bulb... She certainly didn't get her father's brains. But why were you training this girl in the first place?"

"Well, this girl- Keisha's her name- she's good friends with Lady Noire, and it was her who suggested training with me to improve her hand-to-hand combat skills. I guess Lady Noire must've heard from Lady Vert that I was the one who trained Peashy in CQC to begin with..."

"So it was a favor from Lastation's CPU?" Lisa blinked in surprise. "Well, surely once Peashy hears that, she'll calm down and see reason..."

"Yeah, but she's obviously not gonna want to talk to me right now," the soldier pointed out. "That's why I called you- maybe you can go see her and tell her what happened..."

"Yes, I'll do that," Lisa nodded. "But I'll probably give her a little time to calm down first. Thank you for calling, Adrian."

"I appreciate it, Ms. Macintosh. Bye for now." With that, Adrian hung up.

Little did either of them know, ensuing events would preclude any chance of them nipping this crisis in the bud...

*To be continued...*