Getting a phone took a long time. Monika was certain she had one back when she was inside the game, but the process of buying one never once occurred to her. You just walked into the store, picked one up and took it to the register, right? Oh no. There was waiting. Lots of waiting. There was also paperwork. She was being added to Rob and Kate's household account since otherwise she would have no way to pay for it.

She didn't realize there was a long time commitment involved when she woke up that morning with anxiety rattling around in her brain. The loud angry voice blaring through Nicole's phone at the previous day's fair wouldn't leave her thoughts. Monika wanted a way to ask Nicole if she was okay but realized she couldn't. Everyone in this reality seemed to communicate by phone and she didn't have one…but someone upstairs did.

Rob would have been able to talk to Nicole on his phone but told Monika it would be a lot easier if she just had her own. Once the boys were at school, Rob drove her to a small store were numerous phones of various sizes hung from racks. She had eaten breakfast shortly before they left and now she was getting hungry for lunch.

Once they got home, she added three phone numbers, or "contacts." The salesman had been perplexed that an 18-year-old girl somehow didn't have a phone until now and no contacts to transfer over. In alphabetical order, her list was Nicole, Kate and Rob. It made her a little sad, but not because it was short. It just didn't feel right without entries for Sayori, Natsuki and Yuri. Maybe one day…if they ever forgave her.

Monika: Hi Nicole, this is Monika. From the fair yesterday?

Nicole: Hi! This is a nice surprise.

Monika: I've been a little worried about you. Are you doing okay?

Nicole: Yeah, I'm ok.

Monika: Just wanted to check.

Nicole: Do you want to come over today? I can show you the birds.

Birds? What was she talking about? She wanted to go but didn't have a car and it was unlikely she would get one of those today as well. Rob was willing to drive her the short distance across town and Monika tried to think too much about how young this made her feel. She caught him flinching a bit when another car got close and realized he was still jumpy after the accident. Once she arrived, Nicole was in the driveway to greet her as Rob waved and then drove off.

"I'm glad you came!" Nicole said and began walking away from her house.

Monika was confused. "We're not going inside?"

Nicole hesitated. "Um…no. The birds are this way."

If they were birds, how was she keeping them anywhere? Monika had her answer once were about halfway to a small building that was inside a large fenced area. A loud noise rang out that, even though she had never encountered one in this reality, she still knew belonged to a rooster. Nicole had been referring to chickens, about two dozen of them milling about inside the fence. They were known to be mostly flightless and easily domesticated.

Nicole opened a door in the fence and invited Monika to come in. She nervously stepped inside while the birds gave her curious looks. There were two collapsible lawn chairs near the back of the fenced area. As Nicole sat down, one little white hen rushed and actually leapt onto her lap. Monika laughed in delight.

"This is Feta," Nicole said. "She's my favorite. Don't tell the others."

"You don't…eat them, do you?"

"No. I eat their eggs, but I would never eat any of them."

"Oh," Monika said. "But I know you're not a vegetarian."

"Nah. I save the ones I can, but that's about it. This is my sanctuary."

Monika had some idea why she needed a sanctuary but kept quiet. After a moment or two, Nicole handed her a little bag of sunflower seeds. Monika reached inside, scooped up a handful, and tossed them out on the ground in front of her. Several of the birds rushed over and nudged each other back and forth, each hoping to get as many as possible. A few of the seeds had gotten on her feet, which Monika hadn't realized but did when one of the hens pecked her big toe.

"Ow!" She pulled her feet out of her sandals and rested them on the chair. The birds searched them for any remaining seeds.

"Sorry, I should have warned you! That's why I wear sneakers when I come to visit."

Both of them laughed as Feta decided she wanted to grab some of the seeds the others had missed, leaping off Nicole's lap. They sat and watched the chickens putter around for a few minutes before Nicole spoke up again.

"So, does Kate know how you feel about Rob?"

Monika turned quickly to face her. "Huh?!"

Nicole couldn't help but laugh. "Come on, it's so obvious."

She sank in her seat and briefly tried to hide her face in her shirt. "Rob and I…have a complicated relationship. Kate knows that and I think we've come to an understanding."

"Has anything, uh, happened between you two?"

"No," Monika said with a touch of disappointment. "Rob was clear about that from the start, but it…took me a while to come to grips with it. I guess it's for the best. It took a long time for Kate to trust me and I don't want to ruin that."

"That sounds like it would be really tough," Nicole said. "For all of you."

"I've worked really hard to accept the way things are. Rob sometimes introduces me to people as his sister and that's sweet in its own way. But…there are times when I think about him in ways that you wouldn't think about your big brother."

"What if you guys worked out some kind of three person relationship?" Nicole asked.

Monika laughed. "Yeah, right."

"Some people do that!"

Monika couldn't tell if she was serious. "Rob doesn't want another wife."

Nicole laughed at that. "Aren't you being a little naive? Most men would love to have multiple partners if society allowed it. It's some kind of evolutionary urge left over from caveman times when they had to spread their seed and populate the Earth."

"I guess it's true that Kate would be the tougher one to convince," Monika said. "But I know you're just teasing me."

She was curious how Nicole would reply, but instead someone else's voice immediately dispelled the peaceful atmosphere. Monika immediately recognized that angry voice. A short and stocky man was stomping towards them. The chickens instinctively backed away. Monika could understand why.

"What the hell are you doing out here?!"

"What's it look like?" Nicole replied. "I'm hanging out with my friend."

"The bathroom's a mess! Get back in the house and clean it up."

Nicole looked around uncomfortably. "Sorry, Monika."

She knew it was time to go home, but there was a problem. She didn't expect to need a ride back this early. Kate was at work and Rob was at physical therapy. Nicole made eye contact with her and seemed to know what the situation was.

She turned to her father. "She doesn't have a car so she needs a ride back."

There was a long and uncomfortable pause. No wonder Nicole didn't want to go inside. Would this brute really say Monika couldn't go home? Would she have to hang out with the chickens while Nicole cleaned the bathroom or whatever he wanted her to do? Would she tell Rob to bring that fancy dagger of his so she could shank this creep when his back was turned?

"Come right back here when you're done," he finally said before stomping his way back towards the house.

Nicole was holding back tears as they got into the car and drove out onto the road. Monika wanted to try and console her but barely got a word out.

"Please just don't," Nicole said.

"You can talk to me about it if you want to," Monika said.

"I know that. But I don't want to."

"Is your mother around?" Monika asked.

"Probably passed out on the couch," Nicole said quietly. Not long after that, they were back at the house. Monika moved to hug Nicole, but she held up one hand.

"Sorry," she said.

"It's okay," Nicole replied. "I just…don't want that right now. I'll text you later."

Monika nodded and watched the car drive away. The whole thing just seemed totally unfair. It also made her think of someone else. Knowing that she would have the house to herself for a while, she walked inside and sat down in front of Rob's laptop computer.

Dear Natsuki,

I've been thinking of you. I hope you and the others are doing well. I know we haven't really talked, but I just wanted to apologize for everything that happened. I've been here for about six months now and I feel like myself for the first time since...well, maybe it's the first time ever. A lot has changed and that brings reflection. I was so sure of myself but this world has challenged me in so many ways and forced me to see that I was wrong. The cruel things I did to you and the others are a stain on my soul. You didn't deserve any of it. I'm so very sorry.

You might not believe me, but I always admired your talent, your passion and your sense of humor. I hope one day I'll get to see you again.

Love,
Monika

Still alone in the house, she went out to the backyard and turned the hose on. As she silently walked back and forth watering the various flowers in the garden, Monika wondered if writing to Natsuki had been too impulsive. And what of Yuri? She was the only one Monika hadn't communicated with at all since arriving in this reality. That was a scary thought. She had been even crueler to Yuri than to Natsuki. The feelings of self-loathing were intense whenever her mind drifted like this, but she wondered if that was what she deserved.

A few hours later, everyone was back home. Rob was reading on the couch, Kate was going through papers at her desk and the boys were in their room watching YouTube videos of garbage trucks. Seeing that Rob's computer was free, she walked over and opened the DDLC folder again. There was a new message.

Monika,

I was surprised that you wrote to me instead of Sayori. Not that I was hoping for that or anything! It sounds like you want me to say that what you did to me was okay or that I'm not upset about it anymore. Sorry, it's not that easy.

I normally wouldn't want to say any more than that, but this might be my only chance so I have to get things off my chest. Sayori tried to take away all the memories of what happened when you were messing with this reality. It mostly worked but part of me remembers. I've had nightmares where I walked into the club room and Yuri was bleeding all over the floor. I don't talk about it with the others because it would upset them, but I know there's some truth behind those dreams and I know that it happened because of you.

Not only that, MC is gone. Sayori says he's just sitting in some classroom staring into space and that without Rob he's like a puppet without strings. But I remember reading manga with him and going over to his house to bake. Yuri remembers sharing chocolate candies while they read that weird-ass book of hers. I know that you understand what those moments meant to us. Have you ever thought about what it meant to have him taken away? Have you ever thought about what we've lost? Or is it only about how you feel?

And you're out there living your best life with Rob like you got a "get out of jail free" card. It really upsets me. I know it shouldn't, but it does. I don't know what else to say. I cared about you. I thought you were my friend. I thought the Literature Club would be a safe place. This is the sort of thing I don't really like to admit, but you hurt me. You hurt all of us. So no, I'm not going to reassure you. I'm going to tell you something my dad used to tell me: sit in the corner and think about what you've done.

Natsuki

Monika stared at Natsuki's letter for a few seconds before bursting into tears. Not the dramatic way with a single tear going down her cheek, full on sobbing into her hands and trying to keep the boogers from getting too messy. She heard that cane thumping the floor as Rob made his way over.

"What happened?!"

"It's my fault," she said through tears. "I wanted to write to Natsuki…and this is what she wrote back."

Rob looked over the letter. "Shit. This is harsh."

"But it's in character," Monika said. "I don't know why I didn't see it coming. I should have let you write to her. You have more experience with whining children."

He laughed at that. "Would you like me to try and talk to her?"

"No. Stick to writing to Sayori. She's the one you love."

He was quiet for a moment. Monika realized she had gone right back to that jealous place without even thinking about it. It was a bad habit whenever she was upset.

Rob took her hand. "Yeah, I love her. And I love you. And Natsuki. And Yuri. And Kate. And the boys. And hamburgers."

Monika covered her mouth and tried to stifle laughter. "Stop it, I'm trying to cry here."

"The point is there's plenty of love to go around and it's a little different for each person."

"You still think that?" Monika asked. "Even after the whole Colleen thing?"

He gave a knowing smile. "Kate told you about that, I see."

"Yeah, sorry."

"It's fine. Look, I…I did love her. She was really kind to me and it was fun talking to her. But that whole clusterfuck was my fault. I had always thought Kate would be the only one who ever thought of me that way. I assumed Colleen would know exactly how I meant it and didn't even entertain the possibility that she was feeling a different sort of love."

"I hope you're not still beating yourself up about it," Monika said. "If you learned something, that's what counts."

"I probably took the wrong lesson from it," Rob replied. "The whole thing upset me so much that my top priority was making sure it didn't happen again. With that in mind, the best option seemed to be just not telling people outside the family that I loved them, even if I did. But I don't want that anymore."

He paused for a moment. "Well, never mind that. We've gotten off on a tangent. What was it that made you want to write to Natsuki?"

Monika knew this question was coming at some point. She struggled with whether or not she should answer. Was it her right to share the details of Nicole's struggles with other people? Maybe telling Rob and Kate would eventually lead to Nicole getting some kind of help. If so, then it was worth the risk.

"Rob, I…I think Nicole's father is abusing her."

His face darkened and he made an expression that was familiar to Monika after several months of living with him. It looked like he was dazed or spaced out, but his mind was actually working like crazy.

"That's…that's really upsetting to hear," he finally said. "I'm sure it upset you too."

"What can we do?" Monika asked.

"I don't know yet," Rob said. "I'll talk to Kate. She has more experience with this type of shit. For now, just try and be a good friend to her."

She nodded. "I will. And speaking of friends…should I write back to Natsuki?"

"I think so," Rob said. "It doesn't have to be long or anything. It just might be good for her to know she was heard."

"Loud and clear," Monika grumbled. He was right, though. If she was serious about trying to make amends with the girls, ignoring them was not the way to go.

Natsuki,

I hear you. I hope one day I can make it up to you.

Love,
Monika

She sat silently in Rob's desk chair for a while after writing that, stewing in her guilt and grief. She wanted so badly to have a quick way to mend her relationships with the girls, especially since Rob and Sayori were coordinating on a way for them to cross over into this reality. The folder where their messages were exchanged was still open and out of the corner of her eye, she saw something new appear. It was addressed to Rob and she called him over.

"Thanks," he said as she got up from the chair. As she walked away, Rob was impressed at her restraint. It wasn't long ago that she would have read this message herself out of paranoia that Sayori would steal him away from her.

Hi Rob,

I don't think Monika should be talking to Natsuki anymore. I saw that message come in earlier today and I figured I should give her the choice of whether or not to read it. She's been on the verge of tears for hours now.

I've tried so hard to make this world a place where she and Yuri would be happy. I made some progress, but they are still feeling hurt. They don't say anything to me because they think I have too much to do managing this reality and they don't want to be a burden, but I know how they feel just the same.

I wish we could talk about this in person. I would even take a chance to talk on a phone. But we're not there yet. I hope she's in a better place before we do our experiment. I'll be in touch tomorrow. Good night!

Love,
Sayori

Rob typed a quick good night message back and then turned away from the computer. It seemed Natsuki had been just as upset as Monika by their exchange. Was there any chance it could have gone better? Should he have tried to broach the subject first? Monika had said several times that she didn't like the idea of him trying to advocate on her behalf to the others and he had tried to honor that. Still, he couldn't help but feel a bit guilty. He had spent so much time with Monika and written
many messages to Sayori, but the other two girls hadn't gotten that same attention. He would have to come up with some way to fix that.