Six years after the death of Palpatine
"Dum, dum, dum, dum da dum, dum da dum." I hum as I get dressed. "Bom, bom, badda, bom."
"Stop that!" orders Shayla. "We don't sing, hum, or in any other way reproduce that tune. No loopholes," she adds.
I turn and hug my wife. "How about?" I begin as I kiss Shayla.
"No."
"What about?" another kiss.
"Still no."
"In which case." further attempts at persuasion is prevented by a tentacle to the lips.
"No Neobarb. Promise me." Shayla says looking me in the eyes.
In response I nip the tip over my mouth, remembering to catch her as her legs buckle.
"We're in a hurry." she points out.
"We're not getting married. Are we?" I say as I lift her up and kiss her.
"Everyone will know." Shayla points out.
"So?" I say
Any reply is interrupted by a knocking on the bedroom door. To my knowledge, there is only one being bold enough to do that.
"Hurry up Master Dee-Jay. It is not done to be tardy." comes Tarkin's voice.
I put Shayla down, smooth everything down and open the door. Wilhuff Tarkin is standing there with Idun in one arm.
"Who let you in? Do I have to tell everyone to shoot to kill?" I say.
Tarkin smiles. "Hardly necessary. Especially when I have an agent on the inside," he says looking at my daughter. Idun smiles.
"Uncle Wilhuff said he is here to make sure you are not late," explains Idun.
"Really, how thoughtful. Normally, where I come from it's the groom who bolts." I say.
"That is the case normally, yes. However, I do not expect such dereliction of duty from Skywalker. You, on the other hand." says Tarkin.
"This is because of the eloping thing? They were both in favour of it." I say.
Tarkin stiffens. "Why did you suggest that? Have you no sense of propriety?"
"You have to ask?" comes Shayla's voice from behind me. "This Neobarb doesn't have such a word in his native tongue."
"We do too. Well, sorta. Means to use the lighter club on the woman before dragging her back to the cave." I say.
"A club?" says Shayla.
"Must have lost it somewhere. Can still drag you back to the cave." I say.
"Later. We have to go," says Shayla before looking at Idun. "Where are your shoes?"
Idun shrugs, "Um" is all she manages.
"Well, come on," she says lifting Idun off Tarkin. "We have to go now. Where are they?"
After ensuring Idun is properly shod we all troop out prior to getting into the floater. Shayla takes one look at Tarkin's speeder and more importantly the woman inside. Mariane is a tall, pale woman and I'm not entirely sure what the formal title for her relationship is. Honoured Lover? Accepted something?
"You left her in the speeder? Really." Shayla begins.
The woman looks up. "Sorry, I just had to finish this chapter. This world has so many good books" Mariane says, waving the reader.
"The words don't actually vanish when you switch off," says Shayla smiling.
"They do. What if they never come back?" says Mariane.
"Good point. So what's the story?"
"Across the Stars," says Mariane.
"By B Salvtarre. Interesting choice." I say.
Both women look at me, 'You have read it?" they both say.
The various analogues between universes were surprising at first but eventually, I got used to it. Turning up an almost beat for a beat copy of the prequels was still weird. Okay, so it's set during the Third Mandalorian Crusade, the names are different and it has a happier ending. Otherwise, yeah. It's also one of the more popular 'Jedi Romances'.
"Yes, a tale of a young noblewoman and her Jedi bodyguard and what happens between them. It's interesting for a number of reasons." I say. Like the uncanny resemblance to certain peoples.
"It was, wasn't it?" says Shayla.
"And how does it compare to the real thing?" asks Mariane
Shayla pauses, "Subtle hints do not work. Not so subtle hints do not work. Shouting 'I love you' right into their face might attract their notice." she says.
I nod. "It's true. I plead that there were a few things on my mind at the time."
Mariane looks at me, "What sort of things?" she says.
I shrug, "Not important anymore. However as people have pointed out, we should get going." I say and turn for the floater.
"Dum, dum, dum, dum da dum, dum da dum." hums Ahsoka as we wait with Anakin.
"I can't believe you taught her that tune," says Anakin.
"But it suits you so well. Especially when you're moody. Were you a moody apprentice?" says Ahsoka.
Anakin looks at me, "You don't have to answer that."
I smile, "I do though. After all, we are all Jedi here. No secrets."
Anakin just stares at me, "No secrets! You?"
"Hey, there were some extenuating circumstances, most of which rhymed with the word mannequin," I say.
"Mannequin Skywalker?" says Ahsoka.
"No," says Anakin reading my face and most likely, my mind.
"They really called him that?" said Ahsoka.
"They really did," I admit.
"Oh, I have to know," says Ahsoka.
"You know how I come from somewhere where the events in this Galaxy are a serialised holo-drama? Well, some people didn't get the best actors." I say looking at Anakin.
"I still don't understand that. Wasn't I the main character?" says Anakin.
"The creator was a bit of a maverick. Had this idea of the mains being relative newcomers to the craft and surrounding them with old pros in supporting roles. Also, child actors are always hit or miss."
"But, Mannequin Skywalker?" says Ahsoka.
"That time, it was mainly miss." I explain.
"Are there any other humorous anecdotes from my other life you intend to share today." grouses Anakin.
"No need to fear that, I have a lifetime supply from this one for that," I say with a smile.
"No, no more. I can wait for the reception," says Anakin.
"But I can't. Just one? Please." says Ahsoka.
"Since it is our solemn duty to instruct our younger members I will comply. Your master's feelings on sand I feel are illuminating.." I begin.
Tarkin hinted that he can have me shot for treason if I don't behave during the ceremony. He did not really need to. Two of the Galaxy's biggest heroes getting married? Why does everyone suspect me? I can behave.
Of course, by behave, I mean constantly checking for assassins, intruders or other disturbances. Anakin 'Never a dull moment' Skywalker and Padme 'The Liberator' Amidala? Who in their right mind would put those two together?
"I think they make a lovely couple," whispers a familiar voice in my ear.
One difference, the small motion of air. I turn. Aurora is standing there. Dressed sharply in a black suit and only glowing a little bit. I look down and check. Feet actually touching the floor.
"Somehow, an endorsement from The Bringer of Chaos is not something that should inspire confidence. Nice work with the suit and ground." I say.
"Thank you. I have been practising," says Aurora.
"Good, good. Is this safe?" I say. A family reunion right now would be, bad.
Aurora smiles. "Like me, my family are a little set in their ways. They are on the lookout for, for, her," she says, trembling a bit. Even the terrible cosmic horror is scared of the terrible cosmic horror she used to be.
"Which you no longer are. I did not think of that. So they cannot sense you, at all." I ask.
"I am not sure. It is usually the destruction and suffering when, she manifested that alerts them. Now, I believe it is the custom to grant the newly mated pair a present? says Aurora.
"What do you have in mind?" I ask, aware I am speaking to a very powerful being.
"I thought laying the systems of the Galaxy at their feet would be appropriate," says Aurora. Before I can react she smiles, "Joke?"
"Oh, good. Good. This line of humour. It's to distance yourself from who you were?" I say.
"Yes, I am not sure if it is funny though. You seldom laugh. Maybe I am doing it wrong." she says.
I hug the worried eldritch terror. "You are doing fine. Not all jokes are the laugh out loud kind. It's also still early days. You'll get there."
"Your wife makes you laugh. How about I try some of those." Aurora purrs, then smiles, "Closer?"
"Closer," I affirm. Raising Vader and battling the Sith was easier on my nerves.
"Oh good. Well, I should drop off this," says Aurora. In her hands is a vase. Well, it looks like a vase. I decide not to ask what the matt black object is made from because running about screaming is bad form at a wedding. Aurora gives me a chaste kiss before departing to place it with the other gifts.
"Who was that?" asks Shayla walking up to me. "She seems to know you well."
"Just the former Goddess of Chaos and Destruction. She's in therapy." I reply blandly.
"You are, not joking. She's really, wait, how do you know her?" she asks.
"Initially she tried to seduce me to the Dark Side with whispers of power. Recently I've been helping her recover from the trauma that made her one of the most dangerous beings in the universe." I say.
"And you did not think to tell me, why?"
"She can extinguish matter with but a thought and for a long time regarded you as a rival. She's better now, but I'd rather you not be the victim of a relapse on her part." I say.
Shayla's tips twitch as she regards Aurora place the vase on the gift table. There is a pause and then there is a small card tied to the vase. The twitching intensifies.
"Did she just..." Shayla begins.
"Yes," I reply.
"And she brought a vase as a wedding present?"
"I am trying not to think about that."
"She's beautiful."
"She's making an effort to appear normal today."
"Normal? She's glowing."
"Bioluminescence is not uncommon among sophonts in the Galaxy."
"That is not bioluminescence. Trust me." says my wife, the doctor.
"Okay, you try to explain the residual light from the Big Bang as an afterglow. I'm sticking with my story. Saves on the running and screaming."
"Really?" says Shayla and walks over to Aurora. "Hello, my name is Shayla. I believe you know my husband." she begins.
Aurora looks at Shayla's outstretched hand for a moment before taking it in a handshake.
"Yes, yes I do," says Aurora.
"He seldom mentions you, I think it is past time we got to know each other don't you?" says Shayla with a smile. Then, indicating that I am not supposed to be part of this conversation I am shooed away. I hurry faster when I hear a duet of laughter. Things man was not supposed to know and all that.
I find my daughter at the creche. As is usual Idun is bossing about a gaggle of her nieces and nephews. Idun looks like a stocky Twi'lek girl with a light green complexion, her deep brown eyes being the main giveaway that she's a hybrid. Most of my genome's contribution is internal Shayla assures me. Idun would be the toughest Twilek around were it not for the grandkids. Something tells me that with these Mandalorian genes in the mix, Twi'leks will soon no longer have a reputation as slaves.
Grandkids. Now there's a thing. Of course, there are more pertinent matters.
"Idun! Where, are your shoes?" I exclaim.
Idun looks down at her feet, then to me and back to her feet again. "Um," she says to the laughter of several sons and daughters in law. This causes the other children to look up.
"Banerran!" says one in the melange of Mandoa and Ryl common to the children. Others take it up.
"Hello to you all as well. Are you being good?" I say. The children all nod.
"Saga." says one boy. Others take it up including some of the adults.
"A story, now? What do we say?" I say.
The children look confused and there is a bit of twitching and attempts at 'now' in several languages before they hit on please, also in several languages.
"Okay, okay. Alright, because this is a wedding let's listen to the tale of Wesley and Buttercup. In the land of Florin, there lived a beautiful..." I begin.
We pause at the Fire Swamp to go watch two people get married and do all those boring bits, of which there are a lot of given that the only difference between Amidala and an actual diety is that the diety is in row six. My crowd is larger when we resume.
"Where were we?" I say to the crowd.
I am reminded that the heroes were in the Fire Swamp and that they had just survived the lightning sand.
"So the next bit is..." I lead.
"ROUS's" chorus the crowd.
"ROUS's? I don't think that they exist." I say.
The children all growl, roar and then tackle me. I am soon covered in a pile of children. It begins to look bad for Wesley when a voice rings out.
"All troopers to aid the Jedi." comes the sharp order.
My sons are in motion before their brains catch up and realise that they're not on duty. As the children are removed I look up at my rescuer. Amidala's Master of Marines. The Hammer. Poster girl of the Republic Military. Grete Hama, aka Anakin's girl next door.
"Master Hama. Thank you." I say to the young woman.
Grete breathes, "Master Jedi, I require assistance from the Force." she says, the formal phrase sounding odd from someone you have known all their life.
"Of course Citizen," I reply equally formally.
I then wrap up the tale at the point where Wesley and Buttercup are captured. Promising to resume after dinner I then find somewhere to speak with Grete.
"How may I help?" I say.
"I have received a marriage proposal," says Grete, no longer the consummate citizen-soldier, but the awkward teenager who was the Chosen One's best friend.
"That's wonderful news. It is? Isn't it? How does this change being Known Lover with Anakin?" I say.
Grete wrings her hands. "It, it kind of formalises it. You see it was Admiral, um Padme who proposed."
I breathe, summon the Force and use it to remind me of marriage customs here. Normally between two people, there are provisions for adding more, just in case. It's all complicated, regarding who may propose and when and the options available to the current spouse, but it really covers all the bases.
"Wow. That is something." I say.
"I know. I mean I have spoken with both Anakin and Ad, Padme. Over what everything would be like. I love and admire her, but..." she says.
Ever since a rather eventful night on the eve of what would become a famous and distinguished career Grete has regarded Padme as a rival. Recently, I was given to understand she had gotten used to seeing her as a co-conspirator. Mutual lover, well, it's the next step.
"Is it so surprising that she loves and admires you in return?" I say.
"But she's The Admiral." protests Grete.
"And you're her Master of Marines. The Hammer. You are a hero in your own right. I think I see the problem and its resolution. On a ship, in the field, you two will be The Admiral and The Hammer. Anywhere domestic and you two are Padme and Grete, wife and wife with Anakin as your husband." I say.
"It's just that I never expected this," she says.
"What? Happiness in overabundance? No, it's not what we expect, still, we should thank the Force that it is." I say.
"I'm not bisexual though, my profile..." comes what is the final protest.
"In my opinion, there is too much put on those labels and they cannot possibly cover every human. Also, consider you only need to be compatible with two people, Anakin and Padme. Or is there yet another?" I say.
"No, just us," says Grete smiling.
"The go knowing the will of the Force. Also, this time I really recommend eloping," I say.
I watch Grete depart, hopefully, a little more certain of her future. I then seek out the other. I find her outside in the gardens. She is kneeling by a flowerbed and is in the process of adding one to the arrangement.
"Knight Amelia," I begin.
"Master Dee-Jay," she replies.
"Is that from Neforaan?" I ask.
Amelia nods.
"I never really thought of flowers as part of terraforming," I say.
"Everything is a part of the whole, all of it is important," says Amelia.
"I notice that you were with the Jedi, but that you did not go to congratulate the couple," I say.
"The masters did that," replies Amelia.
Okay, right. After the war, Amelia decided she wanted to be an orthodox Jedi. There were arguments and tears, and now everyone is being stoic and sensible about things.
"Go speak to them. Wish Anakin, Padme and Hama all the best."
Amelia looks at me, eyes wide.
"Hama?"
Oops, "Okay, quiet on Hama maybe, not sure if that's widely known. Still, this is your opportunity to let go. Or, are there regrets?"
Amelia stares at me, "How do you know? I have buried that so deep."
I reach out and hug Amelia. We knight them, snip those little braid things and sort of forget they're still young people.
"Because I've been there, done that. So, advice from a heretic. Treasure the good memories and let them inform you of how people everywhere think and feel. The insight will serve you well. Feelings are allies, not enemies."
Amelia withdraws, then smiles. "That's hardly heresy."
"No, it is not. So go wish them well. Not for them, but for yourself. Move on and become a great Jedi." I say.
Amelia rises, brushes down her robes and then pauses,
"Why are you helping me, aren't we going to be on opposite sides?" she asks.
"Only on some things, and none of them important. Do you need any further assistance?" I say.
Amelia shakes her head.
'Then go Knight Amelia. The Force is with you. Always."
"And the Force is with you. Always," she says before leaving.
I then return to the crowd. Shayla quickly finds me.
"Where did you sneak off too?" she asks.
"Just keeping all the kids entertained. Weddings are boring when you're six."
"And what tall tale are you telling them?"
"The third best love story."
"Third best?"
"We're at the end of the second. This version is so much better than the original."
"No more nightmares?"
"None," I say as we kiss, "Best reality. Come on. They all love you as Buttercup."
"Who is this, Buttercup?" asks Aurora from behind.
"Let me explain, no, there is too much, let me sum up," I begin as we walk.