Mobius was resisting the urge to laugh.
Not laughter because something was funny, but the sort of laugh that slips out at funerals or when someone else is crying. It was uncharacteristic of him, this awkwardness. But he just couldn't stop revelling in the absurdity of everything.
His eyes were closed, and he could feel Loki watching him. Loki's fingers were long and cold intertwined with his own.
Mobius M. Mobius (seriously, they really couldn't name me anything more creative?) had known exactly what he was doing from one moment to the next for as long as he could remember. He knew why he was doing it and how he felt about it. He had a noble cause and he was good at his job.
I mean, I've made it this far.
But then, in the span of a couple (weeks? months? who knows) everything had gone straight to hell. Mobius was finding himself missing the good month (years? days?) or so that he and Loki spent together, before Roxxcart. When he had been training Loki, eating lunches together and laughing too hard without knowing why.
Sometimes, in all honesty, part of Mobius almost wished he had never met Loki (this Loki) in the first place. Never fought for him, just let him be pruned like all the others.
But that thought was so painful it took his breath away.
And he hated that, he hated that. How in the world could one man unravel everything Mobius had ever known so quickly? Smash into it all like a massive wrecking ball and leave Mobius picking up pieces of himself. Now, nothing was certain. Nothing was guaranteed. They were forging their own timeline. No more brown suits and endless hallways, no more pre-ordained glorious purpose. No meeting at the end of time after their mission was fulfilled.
But, but, but.
Here's where it becomes even more absurd.
Without that wrecking ball, Mobius would never have this. Whatever this was. Holding hands in the dark. He couldn't remember ever holding hands with someone. Mobius's heart was beating embarrassingly quickly.
His words still hung in the air between them. You're beautiful. He had meant it. He'd say it again.
The corner of his mouth tilted up, and he pushed it back down. And then Loki rubbed Mobius's thumb with his own, slowly, like he was checking to make sure he was still awake.
This is better than any meeting at the end of time. I would betray the TVA a thousand times over for this, fired a random synapse in Mobius's brain. The thought was absurd and irrational and scared the living daylights out of him.
What is this?
Mobius had the urge to make a list. He wasn't sure why. He was tired of not knowing why. Maybe a list would help. So while half of his brain began making a list, the other half continued thinking about how soft Loki's hands were (they had held hands before, but not like this. not when you were supposed to notice the softness of the other person's hands). The list went like this.
ISSUES WE ARE DEALING WITH:
-Loki's Jotun form?
-Loki's magic
-Thor knowing about the multiverse?
- Other Bobs
-Where the hell did Ravonna go?
-Where the hell did Sylvie go? Is she still at the Citadel, or-
And then Loki shifted his hand so that it rested under Mobius's. The god began tracing the lines on Mobius's palm with his free hand. Mobius promptly lost his train of thought.
"Are you reading my palm or something?" Mobius asked, opening his eyes. His cheeks were hot. It did in fact look like Loki was trying to tell his fortune.
"I don't know how to do that," Loki said without looking up, focusing on Mobius's hand.
"You really can't sit still can you?"
Loki looked up at this.
"Would you like me to stop?" he asked, maintaining eye contact as he traced a finger up Mobius's wrist, barely grazing the skin. It was a challenge.
Mobius swallowed. One day, maybe being around Loki wouldn't feel like constantly standing on the precipice. (the precipice of what?)
The former analyst cleared his throat and straightened up, using the opportunity to slide his hand away from Loki's. Loki pretended not to notice.
"So, we're going after Thor?"
Loki immediately seemed sobered by the question, straightening up in his seat as well and turning his gaze to the endless space ahead of them.
"Yes."
"Alright, well," Mobius motioned to the controls. "Plug it in, we've got to go to New Asgard, maybe a few months after we killed Bob." He was grateful it was dark, as he was almost certain his face was red and Loki would never shut up if he knew he had made him blush.
"New Asgard?" Loki didn't move. Mobius knew he was stalling.
"Yes well, in the Sacred Timeline, and in this one too since it didn't shoot off very much, Thor eventually settles a new sort of Asgard with the few Asgardians that survived Ragnarok."
Loki hummed thoughtfully, still staring into the distance.
"The coordinates?"
"Yes, right," Loki cleared his throat. Mobius couldn't help but notice how tired he looked, dark circles under his eyes. His air of confidence and bravado was all but gone.
Loki leaned forward and typed something into the ship. Nothing happened.
"That's weird…" Loki said under his breath.
"What's weird?" Mobius asked, leaning forward and looking over Loki's shoulder.
"We can't transport there… it looks blocked?" Loki answered. One of the buttons, crescent shaped and as wide as Mobius's knuckles, was blinking red.
"What do you mean?"
"Aeyhle can't transport directly to New Asgard, 3034. Or anywhere around it for that matter. It's like someone put barriers up around our technology…"
Mobius turned to Loki, searching his face. "Could Thor have already figured it out?"
Loki hesitated a bit, still looking at the buttons. Then he shook his head. "No, no, it's probably unrelated. Maybe something to do with the atmosphere?" He stood up and began pacing around the tiny control room, chin in his hand.
"We never had any problems with tech and the atmosphere at the TVA," Mobius pointed out, following Loki with his eyes, beginning to feel worried. It was still dark, but the glow of the control panel and flashing red button allowed Mobius to see Loki better, elvish profile and furrowed brow.
"Well Aeyhle's different, she's a mix of magic and tech. Maybe she just doesn't appreciate that patch of space."
Mobius snorted. "Glad we're on a ship as temperamental as you are."
Loki exhaled through his nostrils and shot Mobius a smile. "It's fine. Let's just go as close as we can and then pick up a different ship to get to New Asgard. It'd probably be necessary for our disguises anyway."
"Disguises?"
"Well I can hardly show up in front of my brother like this when he's believed me dead for a thousand years," Loki said with the faintest hint of wistfulness. Mobius titled his head to the side, fiddling with the corner of his bandage that had begun to flap up. He'd probably had it on long enough by now, the cut wasn't deep.
"Good point," Mobius conceded. He ripped off the bandage, crumpling it in his hand and tossing it into the trashcan in the corner. His cut-burn combo stung in the open air. Loki moved back to the control panel and punched a few buttons. The glowing darkness ahead of them began to burn away to living gold.
"The closest we can get is a planet called Renedium, let's pick up a new ship there. Then it'll be a week or so journey to New Asgard." Loki turned around, leaning back against the control panel, silhouetted by the blinding gold light behind him. His robe had fallen open to reveal his bare chest (finely sculpted like a cruel trick) and he was grinning without his eyes.
Why did he feel the need to take off his clothes? Mobius thought vaguely. He stood up and took a step towards Loki, whose smile dropped a notch.
"Are you sure you're okay with this?" Mobius asked softly, looking up at Loki. The god averted his eyes. The blinding light outside was beginning to fade, and Mobius blinked back the pressure in his head that always blossomed when jumping through time.
"Of course I am," Loki answered haughtily, but his face didn't match his words.
"I'd understand, y'know, if you were worried about seeing Thor again-" Mobius started imploringly, stepping even closer till they were just a foot apart.
"Mobius," Loki sighed warningly, tensing up. Mobius continued anyway.
"It's just, you aren't alone. You can talk to me." Mobius gently grabbed Loki's left hand. Not flirtatiously, but in a gesture of comfort. Something that felt right in the context of everything that had happened. The light outside the window had faded out, and now a gray planet was visible in the near distance. Loki bent his head down, looking at the floor. His shoulders had relaxed but he still seemed guarded.
"I know."
They stood in silence. Mobius had a million questions (why are you reverting back to your Jotun form? are you losing control of your magic? are you sure you can handle seeing Thor?)
(What is this?)
But he also knew Loki wouldn't (couldn't) give an answer, and Mobius didn't want them to turn to an argument again, even if it meant he wouldn't get any answers. He squeezed Loki's hand gently, then stepped back and walked out of the room, hands in his pockets.
…
Renedium was like a living junkyard. Flying into the planet, it looked eternally overcast, but after sinking through the thick atmosphere, it became dusky and dark. It was also extremely hot.
Loki and Mobius had packed up everything they might need from Aeyhle into two large packs, including clothes ("I can magic us clothes" "I just bought these"), food ("Mobius, that mac and cheese is going to go bad" *shhhhh*), weapons ("oh look it's everyone's favorite flaming dagger again" "how many times do I have to apologize for almost slitting your throat?" "did you hear that question?"), and various other 'helpful items', according to Loki. Mobius was half convinced that Loki would pull an entire ceremonial headpiece from his pack, it was bulging and sticking out in strange places.
They had hidden Aeyhle behind a large pile of scraps sort of shaped like a soda can, but Mobius still felt anxious leaving the ship. If anyone got their hands on her, this entire mission would be for nothing. The multiverse would be cracked wide open. Foreboding crept through his ribs. Why was there a block up around New Asgard? He felt as though their mission was already doomed but he couldn't articulate why.
"Lovely weather, isn't it?" Loki said sarcastically as they began to trek away from Aeyhle. Piles of crushed scrap metal towered around them, like hulking spires in the half light. The ground under them was composed of packed down mud and garbage, and Mobius almost tripped on a half buried beam of aluminum. Everything smelled acrid, like metallic petrichor.
"Yeah, real nice," Mobius snorted in response. His shoulders already ached from the weight of the pack, and he wished he had thought to change out of the grimy clothes they had trained in this morning (hours and hours and ages and ages ago). Loki had put on his button up and slacks again for reasons Mobius would never know. He missed Aeyhle's air conditioning."Where are we going, exactly? You're sure this planet is populated right."
"Of course it's populated."
"He says as if it's obvious people would be living on a scrap planet."
Loki huffed. "There are people, we're walking straight towards a ship rental as we speak."
"So you have everything under control?" Mobius said, the faintest hint of mocking in his voice.
"Yes, in fact, I do." Loki answered. And then it began to rain.
"Oh this is pleasant," Mobius sighed. The droplets were fat and hot, relatively spaced apart, but stung a bit when they fell on skin. "How far is this 'ship rental'?"
"I feel like the answer would make you want to punch me, and I cannot pull off a black eye, so I'll leave you in suspense. Think of it as a fun surprise."
Mobius groaned. They continued walking in silence, save the plunking of heavy droplets on metal, for a good 60 seconds before Loki spoke again.
"Let's play a game."
"What?" Mobius asked, just as he stubbed his toe on a hunk of dull copper. He swore under his breath.
"We should play a game or something, to pass the time."
"You have the attention span of a goldfish."
Loki rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. "Fine." He took longer strides than Mobius, and was now a few steps ahead of him. Mobius took a deep breath to sigh and coughed on the tang of wet metal.
Five minutes later, Mobius decided he didn't actually care about the fate of time if it meant trekking through this godforsaken planet for any longer. Sweat was pricking on his skin painfully, and the straps of the pack were chafing on his shoulders. He already felt lightheaded, and a patch of skin on his forehead was tingling after being hit by a raindrop.
"What did you have in mind?" Mobius asked in defeat, desperate for distraction. Loki's face lit up.
"Well, there's this game Thor used to play with his friends, sometimes they allowed my company, so I think I can remember some of the rules. Not that I wanted to pass time with them, they were all dreadfully self-centered."
Mobius felt a pang in his chest at Loki's casual admission of loneliness. But he also stifled a snort of laughter at the god's hypocrisy.
"What's the game?"
"Well basically you have to ask another player for either a risky action to take, or a question that you are forced to answer."
"So, truth or dare basically?"
"What?" Loki asked, turning his head.
"You don't know what truth or dare is?" Mobius asked. Loki just shrugged. "It's pretty much what you described, but there's no way I'm letting you give me dares."
"Why not," Loki pouted. Mobius just raised an eyebrow. "Fair enough," Loki conceded after a beat. "So what do you suggest we play?"
"Loki, this was your idea," Mobius reminded him. He was beginning to feel extremely irritated. Why couldn't they have hidden Aeyhle somewhere closer? He wiped his forehead with the back of his hand and it came back slick with sweat.
"I mean, I suppose we could play the game anyway, just without risky actions."
"Also known as dares. And fine, whatever."
"You're very crabby right now."
Mobius just grumbled something that sounded like "it's too hot to not be crabby".
"Alright, here's your first question," Loki started, slowing a bit so that the two walked at a matched pace. "What is your biggest regret?"
Mobius huffed out an exhale. "Geez, you're not beating around the bush." Loki just blinked at him.
The former analyst looked at the sky, thinking, which he immediately regretted as a raindrop almost fell in his eye. That certainly wouldn't have been pleasant.
"I mean, it's a difficult question." Mobius stalled. Loki grinned.
"That's the beauty of the game!" he said, motioning with his arms.
"Alright. Well, I guess I regret not realizing that the TVA was all a trick sooner," Mobius finally said. That wasn't totally true; he also regretted implying that Loki and Sylvie were in love. Without that little suggestion, maybe they never would've kissed. Despite Loki's insistence that it was nothing romantic, Mobius was still bothered by it for reasons he couldn't explain.
Mobius tried to readjust the weight of his pack, lifting up the straps with his thumbs for a moment of relief. The straps were damp with sweat.
Loki hummed thoughtfully. "Ok, my turn."
Mobius pondered for a minute, grateful for the distraction from his own discomfort.
"Who are you most angry at, right now?"
"Myself. Sylvie. Same thing I suppose," Loki laughed without humor. Mobius raised his eyebrows. This was not necessarily a fun game, but it was definitely interesting, he decided. Maybe he could use this opportunity to ask Loki all the questions that had been on his mind earlier.
"Can I ask follow up questions?"
"No," Loki said shortly. He almost looked like he was beginning to regret the game choice.
"Alright," Mobius replied. He was beginning to feel a heavy pressure behind his eyes, like the thick, steamy air was getting clogged in his brain. The heat was hitting him in waves of discomfort. They passed a tower of compressed, unrecognizable metal that was as tall as a house. "Your turn to ask me a question again, I guess."
"It is nice to not just be on the receiving end of all the questions, for once," Loki joked. "Ok, what's your… happiest memory?"
Mobius swallowed hard. Everything at the TVA had been a blur of brown and orange. He was satisfied… but happy? The most happiness Mobius could think of had all been with Loki.
Seeing you again after I was almost certain it would never happen. Hugging you in the void. Laughing with you in the cafeteria about things I can't remember. Dancing with you in that club.
Mobius cleared his throat. "I'm not sure," he said finally, hands on the straps of his pack, carefully watching the ground for hazards. His throat was bone dry.
"Not fair, you've got to give a real answer. It's the rules."
"I thought you didn't like rules?" Mobius stalled. Loki scoffed.
"That wasn't even a hard question, I have much worse ones lined up."
"I can't wait," Mobius answered sarcastically. Loki gave him a pointed look, and Mobius sighed in defeat. "I guess… dancing with you. In that club back on Earth. I liked… the music." He finished lamely. He squeezed his nails into his palm in a promise that he would not be caught off guard again.
Loki didn't respond, but Mobius could see him fighting back a smile in his peripheral vision.
This is the stupidest thing I've ever done. But it's fun.
Part of Mobius felt as though he should be embarrassed, passing the time with immature games. But something about Loki always made Mobius want to have fun. Not everything has to be about the job.
Suddenly, Mobius felt a wave of lightheadedness, and a jolt of fear flashed through his stomach. He couldn't remember the last time he had drunk something, and the temperature around them had to be well over 95 degrees fahrenheit. Perfect conditions for heat stroke. Loki didn't seem as affected as Mobius, but his face still had a sheen of perspiration. The plunking of rain on the sheets of metal had become like white noise.
"Ok, my turn for a question. Why were you transforming back to your Jotun form?"
Loki froze. "Veto."
"You can't veto questions," Mobius huffed.
"Sure I can. From now on, no questions related to actual… things we're dealing with. New rule."
"You sure do like rules all of the sudden."
Loki shot him a look, and Mobius sighed. He didn't have the effort to argue.
"Fine. Uhhhh," Mobius wracked his brain, and then spoke in a slightly mocking voice. "What is the most and least attractive thing in a person?" Mobius was pretty sure he had read that question in a magazine a while back.
The TVA somehow had subscriptions to magazines from all across time, that's how Mobius had learned about jet skis. Then he had seen one in action during a mission and had told himself "If I ever get to do something non-work related, it'll be that."
"Ooh, good one." If Loki had heard Mobius's sarcasm, he had ignored it. The sky was the color of an oil spill without the iridescence.
Loki held his elbow in one hand and chin in the other, deep in thought. He tripped on something Mobius couldn't see, and Mobius reached out to steady him. Loki was overheated, but he wasn't as feverish as Mobius was. Disgruntled, Loki smoothed down his shirt, and Mobius felt a moment of satisfaction that it had been Loki who needed steadying. (Well, wasn't it always?)
Loki cleared his throat. "I suppose the most attractive thing in a person… Can I say multiple things actually?" Mobius nodded once and shrugged. Part of him was interested in what Loki was going to say, though he wasn't quite sure why.
"Courage, cunning, and style," Loki rattled off as though it was an advertising slogan.
Mobius nodded and pushed his bottom lip up like Loki had made an interesting philosophical point. "Y'know, I was kinda hoping for something weird, like cowboy hats."
"Sorry to disappoint," Loki laughed. "And for unattractive, I think… boring. Yes, boring people are never hot."
"Am I boring?" Mobius asked, trying extremely hard to focus on the conversation rather than the shadows at the edge of his vision. He was drenched in sweat and his back ached.
"On the contrary, you are one of the most interesting people I've met, believe it or not."
"So I'm 'hot' then?" Mobius fought back a smirk in spite of himself, pleased he'd talked Loki into a corner.
"Ooooh, you got me," Loki laughed and reached out a hand to shake, as if Mobius had won a prize. Mobius took his hand, if only to pull himself up the slight hill they were on.
"What about you?" Loki asked. "Attractive and unattractive, go."
Mobius paused on top of the small hill they had scaled to catch his breath, scanning their surroundings. Piles and piles of metal stretched for miles in every direction. He really wished they had landed closer to the ship rental. The humid air was heavy in his lungs, probably slightly poisonous. Loki was lucky he had put Mobius in such an uncomfortable position with this planet, or he never would've agreed to playing this dumb question game.
"I guess... a lack of compassion is unattractive to me," Mobius said. His voice was getting fainter, as if he was distracted. "But I always like someone that can make me laugh."
Loki glanced at him sideways, then back at the sky. Sighing, Mobius continued down the hill. He felt nauseous and untethered, like his feet weren't attached to the floor. His stomach flipped uncomfortably.
"My turn again, right?" Loki asked. Mobius just nodded.
"What would you name your future daughter?" Loki asked, but his voice raised at the end like he wasn't expecting he'd say that. Mobius had definitely heard that question before somewhere.
He looked over at Loki, who had unbuttoned his shirt, probably in an effort to cool down. He was holding a pink magazine in his hand and reading it. Apparently, that was one of the so-called "helpful items".
"You're cheating," Mobius said, realizing faintly that he sounded extremely more scandalized than fit the situation.
"I'm just helping the game! A question's a question."
Mobius sighed deeply. The rain was letting up, but pressure was building between his eyes. He began to regret agreeing to play this game.
"I have absolutely no idea," Mobius answered, pushing ahead and ignoring the sensation that he was falling sideways. There was no time for dilly-dallying, especially if the block around New Asgard was any indicator of the urgency of their mission. The heat was boiling his intestines. "The TVA didn't let us have sex, let alone start a family. Did you really think baby names are something I regularly considered?"
Loki blinked like the thought hadn't occurred to him. "I suppose not… gods you must be very sexually frustrated my friend."
He was teasing the former analyst now. Of course Loki picked up on the lack of sex rather than the eternal loneliness. Mobius had half a mind to throw up on him. He probably could've.
"Actually right now I'm just normal frustrated," Mobius snarked. He was barely even paying attention. Pressing a hand to his eyes, he tilted his head down in a wave of dizziness.
"I'd be more than willing to help you with that," Loki joked as if Mobius hadn't said anything. The former analyst looked back up at him. Big mistake. Purple and brown spots were blooming in his vision. It felt like his ribcage was trying to lift out of his chest.
"I hope you know this has nothing to do with that offer," Mobius slurred faintly. And then he passed out.
sorry for the slower update loves. hope u enjoy :) also just completely random but I keep forgetting to say this: if anyone wants to use this story as inspo for other stories or art or wtv (cough loki writers please use my ideas i consent) then that's totally chill, my insta is (i also post on my story about my fic progress sometimes)