Chapter 3

I glanced at Charlie. He just shook his head.

"We called his parents and had them call any known relatives that may be willing to donate, if not I may have to put him on a waiting list...then he'll need to continue his dialysis for three days a week until we find a donor. I'm sorry."

Dr. Payton left the room. I looked back at my beautiful husband. Who I wanted desperately to help, and I couldn't.

"Charlie..."

"Har...it's okay."

I teared up and turned my face away from him.

"Har...Har!"

"Excuse me Charlie...I'm sorry."

I left the room and went to the woman's bathroom closest to his room. I broke dowm and sobbed uncontrollably. I slid down the side of the wall and cried into my hand. I couldn't go back and face Charlie.

"Why?" I said aloud. "Why him!?"

I sobbed again and sniffled. I had snot just running out of my nose. I tried to wipe it with my sleeve. I screamed and contiued to wail.

"Char...Charlie..." I whimpered. "My Charlie..."

I looked at my wrist. I still had my matching tattoo to his. It made me cry even more.

"After all we've been through...don't take him from me like this!"

I wasn't sure who I was speaking too.

"Please...please!"

I hit the floor with the side of my hand and hid my face in my knees. A few minutes later a woman came in.

"Miss are you alright?"

"Yeah...Yeah I'm just fine...Move!"

I rudely brushed past her. I wasn't in the mood for empathy. I took a walk down the hallway and called my mom.

"Mommy...I'm so upset..."

"What's going on dear...did you hear anymore from the doctor? Is this about Charlie hon?"

"Mommy...I...he needs a kidney and the doctor said I can't give him one..."

"Oh honey..."

I sobbed again.

"He's my husband...and I love him..."

"I know you do honey...Charlie knows you do..."

"I was trying to stay positive because I was so sure I could help him...I wanted too..."

"He knows that..."

"But Momma I feel so useless against this...I...I'm his wife...but what kind of a wife can't even help her own husband."

"Harmione...You offering up your own kidney to him even before you knew you could is love and help enough...he knows you'd give him both of your kidneys...or your heart, or lungs or whatever to him if you could."

"I know...but I'm just so upset...my heart is like...literally broken." I said through my tears.

"Then go be with him. Be with Charlie...he must be really scared...and worried about you...if the two of you just stay together you'll be alright..."

"Okay...I just feel like I should do more..."

"You've done it all...its out of your hands now."

"I'm gonna go see him...I love you Mom."

"I love you too. So very much. Kiss and hug Charlie for me...hang in there Harmione."

I returned to Charlie's room. I tried to clean my face up as best I could. The dialysis was over. The nurse was in there cleaning up. Charlie was by the window putting his jacket on.

"Be careful with that arm Charlie...it'll be sore." She told him.

"Thanks for the tip."

He grunted as he pulled his arm through the sleeve.

"Do you feel dizzy at all?"

"No...I just wanna get out here."

"Yes sir."

As she walked by me, Charlie finally noticed me.

"Harmione..."

I sniffled a bit.

"Aww Har...Babe come here to me."

He swiftly walked over and put his arms around me, despite one of his arms being sore. I put one arm around his neck, and the other on his shoulder stroking his back. I felt him put his hand on the back of my head and pulled me in closer.

"Hey...I'm sorry about those things I said I was just mad...but I agree with you okay...we'll figure this out...just like we have everything else...okay? You and me."

"I love you Char..." I cried out in squeak.

"I love you too...don't you know you mean more than anything to me...we'll get through this...come on...we're fighters right? You and I...it's what we do..."

"I'm sorry I can't give you my-"

"I don't want to hear it...its alright...okay...at least now we know don't we? You could have killed me with your kidney."

I laughed slightly.

"Huh...see...you can't get rid of me that easy." He said through a laugh.

"Okay...aww...oh let me kiss you..."

He pecked my lips.

"You were so upset when you left this room..."

He kissed me again. This time longer and more passionately.

"Don't cry for my babe...I know how you get...okay?"

He took his hands and wiped my tears. Dr. Payton entered the room.

"Harmione...Charlie...I bring you good news...we found a match...they want the surgery to take place right away...tomorrow morning actually.

"Who? Are they here?!" Charlie asked. The moment he asked was when they stepped in.

"Dad..."

"Hey Charles...err...Charlie...we have the same blood type son...same everything...after all these years I always wanted to be there for you...I wanted to do something to save my son and this is my chance. The only baby boy your mother ever had...I...I love you too much not to do this son.

Charlie slowly let go of me. He met his Dad half way. They embraced each other and cried into each other's arms.

"I love you Dad..." I heard Charlie cry.

"I love you too son...oh my sweet baby boy."

He began to stroke the back of Charlie's head. I just smiled with tears in my eyes. My smile disappeared when Charlie grunted. He quickly moved away from his Dad and held his stomach.

"Charlie!" His dad exclaimed. I gasped.

"Ah...it hurts so bad..."

"What does boy? Here."

His Dad rubbed Charlie's stomach.

"My stomach and...mmmm...my back..."

"Don't worry son...I'm here now...I'll take that pain away from you tomorrow I promise."

"Thanks Dad..."

They hugged again. Ray stroked Charlie's lower back to ease the pressure. I could see the pain already lifting from Charlie as his father held him.

The following Friday Charlie was evaluated and prepared for surgery. He would be under for six hours. Three hours for each kidney. Ray wasn't going to be under for half that long. They were preparing him to take out only one of his kidneys to give to Charlie. Although taking out Ray's kidney might be tougher on Ray than Charlie receiving it. The entire family was allowed to see both of them before the surgery took place.

"See you soon Char." My Dad told him.

"Thanks Ben."

Sierra came and gave Charlie lots of hugs.

"Everyone is praying for and thinking of you guys." She replied.

"Thanks cuz."

"Ray...sweetheart I love you..." I heard Dana exclaim. "I can't wait until this is over."

"Don't fret none or worry your pretty little head Dana... Charlie and I are well taken care of." He said back. Dana pecked his lips, he hugged her tightly.

I brought the kids with me. Bryan was standing beside Charlie's gurney. I was holding Isabelle. Jesse was holding Annabelle and Justice was holding Mirabelle.

"Okay...girls give me kisses." Charlie told them. We each leaned down so Charlie could kiss each of the girls on the cheek.

"Hey Bry, you'll be the man of the house until I get back on my feet alright?"

"I'll try Daddy."

"Give me a hug and kiss, little man."

Bryan hugged Charlie around the neck. Charlie pecked the side of his head.

"Be good." He told him.

"Charlie...my baby." It was Dana. She leaned down near him and kissed his cheek. She embraced him tigthly and began to cry.

"Don't let those doctor's hurt you...you understand?"

"Mom...I'll be with Dad...I'm fine..."

"I love you baby." She kissed the side of his head once more.

"Love you too Mom."

I gave Isabelle to Dad.

"Hi Pawpaw!"

"Hey Isa sweetie!"

I gently took Charlie's hand. I softly began to cry.

"You'll see me after this..."

"I know...I just...oh Char..."

I leaned forward and put my arms around his neck. He put his arms around me.

"This isn't goodbye." He whispered. I tried to hold on to him tighter.

"I'll dream about you...okay?"

I nodded through my tears.

"Don't cry for me...please..."

"I...I can't help it Char...I love you so much..."

"I love you too..."

I felt him run his hands through my hair and down my back. He kissed the side of my head.

"I don't wanna let go..."

"They can't perform the surgery until you do."

"Charlie..."

"Yeah?"

"Promise me something..."

"Okay...I promise..."

"Whatever happens...I'll see you again..."

"I promise you'll see me again...just as I am now...only with a new kidney okay?"

I nodded.

"Okay...now let go of me babe so they can take me."

"Just five more minutes..."

"Har..."

"Three...Charlie please!"

I felt him re-adjust his grip on me to hold me tighter. He kissed the side of my head again and stroked my back. His surgery was harder on me than it was on him. I didn't want those long six hours to start. He seemed fine sitting up on that gurney. I just wanted to take him home with me and hold him forever. I began to cry, to my surprise I began to cry hysterically.

"Harmione..." I heard my Dad speak out.

"I want to go with you!" I cried. I touched Charlie's face and put my forehead against his. I felt his soft fringe against my head. He kissed me.

"Har...baby...I want you let to go of me...go with your Dad...it'll be easier for me to go under if I know you're with someone that will take care of you during all this."

He nuzzled my head with his bangs. He then kissed me again.

"Okay?"

My lips trembled.

"Don't cry...I love you..." He said and wiped my tears away.

"Please don't cry...don't..."

I looked into his eyes. He began to cry.

"Please don't cry Har..."

"Char..." I sniffled and wiped his tears away.

"One more hug and kiss and go with your Dad...okay?" He cleared his throat.

I kissed him, and hugged him tightly. He gave me a squeeze. As I let go Dad gave Isabelle to Mom and grabbed my wrist. He pulled me away from Charlie. The nurses came in to move him and Ray to the operating room. Dad hugged me from behind and put his head on my shoulder.

"I know it's hard...but be strong for him." He whispered. I nodded but there was still a lining of tears in my eyes.