It was Saturday. The weekend had started, and Mac and Bloo were ready to beat each other at thumb wrestling.
MAC: My Finger Fighter is gonna beat your Thumb Thrassler!
BLOO: Not if my Thumb Thrassler beats your Finger McFinger guy!
MAC: Bloo, it's Finger Fighter.
BLOO: You're on!
Just as they started to wrestle, no one in the house heard Hans sneak out of his box. He crept throughout the hall, and into a small storage closet. He saw and picked up a pike, sharpened it against a block of steel, and went out. He saw Frankie letting an imaginary friend get adopted.
KID: So what was your life like at Foster's.
IMAGINARY FRIEND: We had some pizza, we partied, we nearly got killed a couple of times...
KID: Killed? By who?
FRANKIE: From some psycho penguin Hans. He's Russian, has weird sharp fingers...
HANS:...and I am right behind you.
FRANKIE: Yeah, yeah - AAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUGH!
Frankie ran for her life as Hans chased her with the pike, trying to spear her with it!
HANS: Come back so I can kill you!
Meanwhile, Mac heard a noise.
MAC: Bloo, I hear something!
BLOO: Do you hear the sound of me winning?
MAC: No, Bloo! It's Frankie. She's screaming. She's being chased. Let's go.
BLOO: But Mac!
MAC: Bloo!
BLOO: Fiiiine.
They turned to the corner to see Frankie being chased by the penguin.
MAC: It's Hans! He's chasing Frankie!
BLOO: GO AWAY, HANS!
HANS: You nincompoops cannot defeat me! On the contrary - YOU NEEDED ME.
They all stopped and turned to Hans.
BLOO: What the heck are you talking about, H?
HANS: If it weren't for me, you wouldn't need to defeat me, so you wouldn't be here. All you would do is get adopted, and wait for the bread to rise, or even more exciting, harvesting your precious crop of wheat. I am the composer - the conductor - the director - the queen bee! Don't you see?
No one said anything.
FRANKIE: Dude, you're just a lunatic.
This made Hans furious.
HANS: So be it.
He picked up the pike and charged at Frankie, only for Bloo to pick up another pike from the closet, and battle with Hans. They swordfought and swordfought until Hans knocked the pike out of Bloo's hands, causing it to go right into the wall.
BLOO: My pike!
Hans pointed the pike at Bloo, glaring at him with burning red eyes as Bloo sweated and sweated with his hands up.
HANS: Any last words, Blooregard?
BLOO: Bottle?
HANS: Heh. You're so pathetic you can't even say a proper final world. Well, I've finally won, and NOTHING IS GOING TO MESS IT UP FOR ME NOW.
LAUREN: We will.
They turned to see mom and Madame Foster glaring at Hans.
LAUREN: Put him down!
HANS: Your choice, guys; he can be together or in pieces. If he's thought of him once, he can think of him again!
Hans raised the pike over Bloo until Lauren kicked it out of his hands, causing it to land into a flower vase. Bloo was pretty much terrified.
BLOO: Help me!
MADAME FOSTER: Listen! Hans, how about instead of fighting, we challenge you to a competition of your choosing? If we win, you go into your box and not bother us for two weeks. If you win, you the entire house.
Everyone gasped in horror.
FRNKIE: Grandma, are you crazy?
Hans thought for a moment.
HANS: Race car driving.
MADAME FOSTER: Deal - race car driving?
HANS: Yes. Three laps, the old race track in town, next Friday. Enjoy your moment of serendipity when it lasts, for I, Hans the imaginary penguin, the most feared bird in the universe, SHALL PREVAIL! So long, inferiors. Better start doing practice laps.
Hans went back into the box, as the gang stood perfectly still, like statues.
ALL: We're doomed.
Later, everyone was terrified of the news; none of them ever competed in race car driving before.
GUMGUM: Hmm, race cars, race cars, what do I know about race cars? Oh, not much. We can't beat that chump!
EDUARDO: Sí. ¡Nos sentaremos en la calle, esperando a que extraños nos den comida!
Eduardo cried as per usual.
WILT: This is not OK!
CHERRI: You're telling me!
MR. HERRIMAN: Everyone, calm down! Hans will NOT win this racing tournament.
FRANKIE: You know, Herriman, if you had just bought a lock -
MR. HERRIMAN: Master Hans' self restraint if the only lock the box can hold, Miss Francis.
KNACK: He's right, guys; we WILL NOT suffer from Han's wrath! We will win this race, and we will stay in our homes! So, uh...any ideas?
WILT: Well, we can research racing!
KNACK: Good idea!
So they got some old DVDs of car racing movies to research. Meanwhile, Mac and Bloo were brainstorming ideas for ways they could beat Hans.
BLOO: Why don't we use a jet plane as a go-kart?
MAC: Bloo, we can't just do that!
BLOO: I say we can.
MAC: Why don't we get coached?
BLOO: Perfect idea!
The next day, they and mom went to 'Coaches for Hire' a shop where you can get free coaching.
LAUREN: OK, boys. You can only pick one coach.
MAC: OK, mom!
They went to find one coach, two coach, red coach, blue coach, black coach, blue coach, old coach, and new coach, but they weren't satisfied. It wasn't until they saw a certain blonde haired coach. Bloo went up to him.
BLOO: Excuse me? Mister Coach? There's this really scummy Russian imaginary friend. His name is Hans, he's a penguin, and he is the worst! He tries to kill us and take over the world and all that stuff, and we challenged him to a game of his choosing. He chose race car driving, so we gotta train and train by this Friday, since none of us have ever drove a race car in our lives!
The coach turned to Bloo.
COACH: I am coach Mike DeLally. I do not coach anyone. Not anymore at least.
MAC: Please? You're the only one who can teach us!
COACH: No.
MAC: If we don't win, Hans will take over Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends!
DeLally stopped and thought about it for a moment.
COACH: Fine. Just this one time!
BLOO: God bless you!
LAUREN Come on, boys, let's go!
Later, at the track, DeLally was coaching the friends.
COACH: Every race car is different: it may vary in weight, engine size, and handling capabilities, among many other factors. Before driving a race car, you should take note of all of the race car's specifications and abilities.
They got into their cars.
WILT: Hmm...it needs one quarter gallon of gas. It can go 85 miles per hour, and it has heavy duty tires.
COACH: Racing helmets?
STUMPY: Check.
COACH: Fireproof suits?
BLOO: Check.
COACH: Racing gloves?
EDUARDO: Check.
COACH: Racing shoes?
Coco: Coco (check).
COACH: OK, guys. Go for a test drive.
They all drove their cars at moderately high speeds.
COACH: Race cars will get your heart pumping and fill you with adrenaline, but that doesn't mean you need to leave your comfort zone. You know your driving limits better than anyone, so always listen to yourself and don't push your car beyond your own abilities. The more you practice racing, the better you'll get, so take it slowly and don't try to drive your race car faster than you are capable of doing.
GUMGUM: Got it!
They drove their cars faster and faster. After a fun test drive, they got out and congratulated themselves.
LAUREN: Woah, guys. That was really fast! We'll beat Hans in no time!
Soon, Hans came onto the track.
HANS: Excuse me. Your time is up on the track. It's my turn to use the race course.
STUMPY: Remember, Hans, if one of us reaches the finish line of the final lap first, we win. And let's face it - there's many of us, and only of you.
Hans whistled for his team, which consisted of -
TERRENCE: Long time so see, dork!
MAC: TERRENCE?!
TERRENCE: Yep. It's me. Happy to see me? No? GOOD!
MAC: But how are you out of jail?
TERRENCE: One word - replacement dummy.
MAC: Oh, that makes sense.
The team also had -
FRANKIE: Oh, great; it's Duchess.
DUCHESS: Hello, fools. I am happy to be part of this - racing sport.
And it also had -
FRANKIE: Mayle too?!
Mayle: Happy to see you, pheasants. Now, I need a cold latte with ice cubes and cinnamon, and free service spa care during breaks.
Oh, and it also had Squash and Stretch.
STRETCH: Uh, Squash, why are we doin' this again?
SQUASH: You know, to help the boss.
STRETCH: Oh, the boss, the boss, got it.
BLOO: Hans, we are WAY more talented than you and your crummy team!
With a snap of Hans' fingers, Terrence got into the race car and drove off, faster than any of the gang. So much so that he left fire all over the course. Terrence turned to Bloo to say the cruelest thing possible.
TERRENCE: You were saying, Bloofus?
Bloo was wide eyed as his mouth gaped open. The gang walked off as Hans' team laughed at them.
HANS: Good luck on Friday, fools.
COCO: Coco co cocococo co coco co cococo (I'll go unpack).
MAC: Coco. no! We can't forfeit! Coach DeLally is an amazing coach! Right?
DeLally was gone.
LAUREN: Where did he go?
DeLally was sitting under an oak-tree. Mac came over to comfort him.
MAC: Coach? Coach DeLally? Are you OK?
COACH: Sure, sure, I'm OK...
MAC: You seem nervous. Don't you wanna win against Hans and his team?
COACH: Of course. What kind of coach would I be if I didn't help you? Now let's prepare for Friday.
Throughout Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, DeLally was coaching the team about racing, speed, drifting, etc. The team went from little geeks to racing freaks, working real hard to become racing champions, dubbing themselves "The Furious Friends." However, nothing could have prepared the gang for what was to come. Without anyone knowing, Terrence snuck onto the racing course while the team was training, and he detached some important parts from Stumpy and Eduardo's cars, such as brakes, those shifter stick thingamabobs, and part of the engine. Once the went off, he hid in a bush too see the fruits of his labor.
COACH: OK, Ed, go for a practice run.
EDUARDO: Si, Senor Coach!
He got in and began to drive a little faster than how he normally did.
COACH: OK, Ed, that's enough.
EDUARDO: Um, I can't find the brakes!
COACH: No brakes?
EDUARDO: I can't stop! HEEEEEEELP ME!
Eduardo began crying and sobbing until he drove off the track and into a tree! After they got him out, the gang inspected the damage as Terrence fled the crime scene.
COACH: Hmm...the brakes and shifter are missing!
STUMPY: Mine are too!
MR. HERRIMAN: There is one obvious answer; we have been sabotaged!
ALL: Sabotaged!
MR. HERRIMAN: Sabotaged!
ALL: Sabotaged!
MR. HERRIMAN: Sabotaged!
ALL: Sabo -
MR. HERRIMAN: Stop it.
MAC: OK, so we've been sabotaged - BUT WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?!
WILT: Terrence! He probably messed with our cars so that his team can win! At least he didn't plant grenades on the -
Oh, and Terrence planted grenades on the rest of the cars, making them explode.
This was the team's darkest hour. And since he was the coach for the Furious Friends, DeLally was ashamed. He slumped off as Mac followed him.
MAC: Mr. DeLally? Are you OK? You need to coach us, or else we'll be kicked out!
DeLally looked at Mac and sighed.
COACH: Back in the 1980's, I was one of the most celebrated stock race car drivers in the world. I was loved, praised, and I won multiple tournaments and championships, being named the #2 greatest racer in the world by age 29. By age 48, I retired and became a tutor for other race car drivers. Some of the best learned from me. One day, a student of mine was racing in the finals. However, his brakes malfunctioned, and he couldn't stay on the track. He nearly died. I felt so guilt ridden, I decided to quit coaching to get away from my shame. I failed you and Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, just as I failed him. I'm sorry I couldn't teach you, Mac...
DeLally hung his head in sorrow, as Mac felt sympathetic, while one of his friends was a direct victim of a car crash, and all of his friends emotionally scarred.
MAC: What do we do now?
COACH: You need to win the tournament. Do it for Foster's.
Mac walked off to his mom.
LAUREN: Well, what did he say?
MAC: He said that he was a race car driver, turned coach who decided to quit after one of his students crashed, and he blames himself for this.
BLOO: Now how are we gonna win?!
STUMPY: Well, I did make some back-up cars.
Stumpy took off a curtain to reveal several cars. Despite looking somewhat exaggerated, they were sleek and polished. Everyone looked in awe.
FRANKIE: Come on, guys! Let's win this thing!
It was the big day; the whole town was watching, and the racers got into their cars. Bloo faced Hans and said...
BLOO: May the best imaginary friend win.
HANS: The best WILL win.
They got in their cars.
ANNOUNCER: The cars decked out on the right, the fast figments, the thoughts of fury, put your hands together for the Furious Friends!
Everyone clapped for the gang.
ANNOUNCER: The cars decked out on the right, they're mean, lean, and just plain awful, iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit's the Injustice League!
Everyone booed for the opponents.
ANNOUNCER: Are you ready? Set? GO!
The cars drove off at high speeds, and they were determined to win.
ANNOUNCER: It looks like GumGum's got the lead with this one, but what's this?
GumGum spat gum at Mayle's car, obstructing her view.
ANNOUNCER: Ooh! The sticky splat attack! Clever move, GumGum.
Mayle tried to wipe the gum off, but to no avail.
Mayle: Darn it! Where's sulfuric acid when you need it?
However, Squash loaded up a harpoon, aimed, and fired it at GumGum's car!
ANNOUNCER: Ouch! The harpoon move. GumGum is eliminated!
However, the last laugh was Coco's, as she had a pie tin. She launched it at Squash and Stretch's car, and it somehow pushed them off the track.
ANNOUNCER: Looks like these two have been driven off the track, as Coco takes the lead!
MAC: Come on, win this for us, Coco!
But as Coco was driving, Duchess poured some ink. Even though Coco made it past the finish line, she came into contact with the ink in the second lap, and skidded off the track.
ANNOUNCER: Coco is out!
Mac was getting worried. Luckily, Blooregard Q. Kazoo came in used a rocket to blast off to the finish line, dazing Duchess as well. This also caused her car to catch on fire.
DUCHESS: Typical.
ANNOUNCER: Duchess is out!
Bloo was just about to reach the finish line when Terrence came in and rammed his car into Bloo's.
TERRENCE: Take that, Bloofus!
Both cars made sparks of flame, and they started to burn and even melt!
ANNOUNCER: Oops! A two for one! Both Bloo and Terrence are eliminated, even they both reached the line, making this a tie.
Mac looked around for anyone who could play, until he saw DeLally.
MAC: Coach Delally! This is your time to make it right!
COACH: Me?
MAC: You can do it! If you don't win this for us, we'll be homeless! DO YOR BEST!
DeLally knew that he was right. There was no other option.
It was the final lap, DeLally got into Wilt's car, and drove off along with Hans. Hans got a rocket, and blasted himself off, like Bloo did before. DeLally picked up a rocket, and did the same. The two were head to head, competing to reach the finish line. Just as both cars' rockets burned down, DeLally made it first.
ANNOUNCER: THE FURIOUS FRIENDS WIN!
The Furious Friends leaped up into the air to celebrate their victory.
MAC: WE WON! WE ACTUALLY WON!
HANS: We lost. WE ACTUALLY LOST. I'll go back into my box.
TERRENCE: I'll go back to jail.
The entire crew celebrated.
MAC: We won. Thank you, Coach.
COACH: No, Mac, thank you; you saved me from my own insecurity, and I helped save the house.
BLOO: WE WON, SUCKERS! TASTE THAT HANS, YOU SUCK!
STRETCH: HOORAY, THEY WON!
Squash stared at him disappointingly.
STRECTH: Sorry...