Chapter 9

Not-so-Campy Camping

"Alright, we've wandered around long enough. It's about time to set up camp."

Marie, poor girl, jumped roughly half a foot in the air due to having heard nothing but crunching leaves.

"EHVOI!?"

Oh dear gods above that is her eevee? How can something so potentially dangerous be so adorable?

"E-Evelyn! Sigh, Myths preserve, you almost gave me a heart attack mister whittington! Could you not have given me some kind of warning?"

"What would you have me do then, grab your shoulder like a horror movie villain?"

"Yeah, you're right. Sorry."

"Oh, no, you were 100% in the right to feel angry and demanding. I could have sped up and gotten in front of you, or something along those lines. Getting mad at people is entirely valid. Bottling your emotions up has a chance to lead to cracking glass."

A snort. Oh by Dehva Themself this- if only I had a means to capture this moment if forever.

We may only hope to never forget it.

Oh, you again. I hope you will forgive me for forgetting about you.

No offense taken.

"I'll take watch. You set it up. Please."

"Alright. Evelyn, you watch with them... And even if that's true, you make it sound like me getting mad at you was the only realistic result."

"May not be the only one, but it is a healthy option."

The little ball of fluff in question is currently staring intently at my backpack.

"Alright, so, check off... Rations?"

"Check."

"Enough pokeballs so that you can keep Ria, along with anyone who would want to join you?"

If I would have them along, yes. "Check"

"Sleeping bag?"

"Check."

"Alright, that should be everything. Also, since I refuse to let you just stuff Ria in a pokeball the whole time-"

"But it is far more effic-"

"DAMN YOUR EFFICIENCY! The point of this is to give you an emotional bond with Ria, and fix your brain, so that you aren't only partly human! If your soul really was turn out like you claim, having an Aura manipulator is going to make fixing it that much easier! AND, it is recorded that it is almost impossible to get a Riolu to evolve without forging a bond with them! Ergo, you and Ria are going to become friends, so help me Arceus!"

"But-"

"And, I KNOW you weren't about to just say you DIDN'T want it fixed! Because I can TEACH you why you do!"

...Flashbacks. Of Mira somehow managing to twist my arms into an actual, full knot without breaking whatever my bones are now. With a smile that would make Hades panic a tad. The canon Hades.

I know now that I do not want to draw her ire.

"...But how am I supposed to find a city? This place is practically in Nowhere, Kansas."

"Please. Half a day's walking north will get you to a fairly well-off town. That'll do ya well enough if you thrived here. And you did. Anyways, before I got off track, because I refuse to let you just stuff Ria in a pokeball the whole time, I sewed a pocket- er, a convenient hole really, given how big it is- into the front of it for her to rest in when needed. Now that you know, git. Or do you want Ol' Strongarm Mira to give you a little tidbit before you do?"

I moved so fast a vacuum was left in my wake. The third thing I was taught here: Most of the time, if Mira "Wants you to learn something", she uses the teaching method of the school of hard knocks.

I can already tell what they want, and "no, you cannot fight my Riolu. If you really feel the need to be beaten, you can wait until we get to the town. Not only are we in the wild, meaning we are for all intents and purposes on our own, we have no clue whether or not the pokemon here are the type to catch us on the off-foot generated by a battle and then swoop in to finish the job."

"Hey, uh, can you please for the love of Arceus NOT try to give me a nightmare tonight? Bad enough that we're 'on our own', do you really want me to end up sleep deprived and incapable of functioning as a sane human being? Already starting to run low here."

"Apologies. Did not know it was that late. I shall continue my vigil silently."

I proceed to swing the backpack around and boggle at how Ria is sleeping in the pocket hole. Not half a week ago, she was hostile enough to try and attack me. Now, she is sleeping with her back turned to me. I honestly cannot believe this. And that is why I am observing, to try and gather my thoughts. Not because they are adorable.

I will break your elbows if you continue insisting that.

Ah. Nothing beats the good 'ol peace and quiet of the ranch when it's just me, the children, and the squad. Sure, the kid was all right, but now I don't really need to worry about anyone else. I reckon that now, I can even-

Wait.

I forgot to give 'em my old Dex.

Shit.

"SIG! I need you!"

The reliable little sentinel immediately came... Flying? I think? At the call.

"What is it you need?"

Ah, damnit. He isn't going to let me down for this one.

"...Forgot to give the new kid my old Dex."

"...very well. Prepare yourself and come back to me when you are ready to depart."

I- huh.

"What? No reminder at how you're smarter than me?"

"No, actually. I know how important this is for you, as you are his Mentor, whether you accept it or not. When necessary, I can turn the other cheek."

"Huh. That's... Actually rather mature of you. Thanks."

"Do not worry. As soon as you make some other blunder, I will be back to serving you every single way you could have done infinitely better infinitely easily on a silver platter."

"Snort. Gee, thanks."

"A thousand times, you're welcome. It is most certainly my pleasure."

Hah. I hope New Kid gets to have moments like this himself later down the line.

AN: so, some news:

1. DGI is gonna get an update between right now and the 8th! praise whatever god is alive! The frankensteinien monster yet breathes!

2. I plan on cross-posting all of my works onto spacebattles and/or sufficient velocity to make it easier to determine what/who is speaking throughout the stories. Post Mortem note: probably not gonna do this until i finish the main storyline, or something. maybe some other achievement? i dunno i already established that i am lazy.

3. plan on doing a repost so that i can put the chapter titles in the chapter, so i dont have to limit them.

4. hello, yes, you, guest reviewer from chapter one. so sorry to respond to your question so late, it was just so critical, vapid, and unhelpful my brain just shoved its existence off to the said, declaring it vestigial knowledge. to answer it, considering how you hide behind a anon account, this is most likely better work than you ever could have made. i mean, seriously. "What is this drivel?". the only piece of unhelpful criticism i can think of that could top this is fanatical sycophancy, declaring that X work is the greatest thing since capital G God even if it is the literary equivalent of literal nothing. god. if my hard work seriously pisses you off that much, just go somewhere else man. you aint held at gunpoint to read my stuff.

christ.