Coop felt like he was walking on eggshells throughout most of the class. He was sure that at any moment one of the teachers was going to recognize him, point him out to the class, or something. Instead the whole class passed in a nervous blur of energy that felt like a small eternity. Neither one of them had even made eye contact with him, let alone act like they recognized him.
It didn't help that he hadn't told Dennis about any of that and he definitely couldn't do it now in the middle of class.
By the last few minutes of class he had almost convinced himself that he was in the clear. Maybe they really didn't recognize him? Or maybe they did and just didn't suspect anything? If they've been teaching for a while they must have seen their fair share of fights between students. Maybe they just brushed it off.
Class was almost over and Dr. Membrane was handing out the homework. It was a simple "getting to know you" assignment. Just a page of questions like 'What are your pronouns?', 'What name do you prefer?', etc.
He'd just gotten to Coop and Dennis's lab station when he leaned down to whisper to them.
"Do you two mind staying after class for a bit?" Then handed them the homework.
Shit!
Coop watched the rest of their classmates leave with a sense of dread. Just one day. One day he wanted to have a semi-normal day and instead this had to happen.
He patted his back pocket and felt the comforting weight of his walkie talkie there. He quickly turned the speaker on and hid it back in his pocket. The walkie talkie made a soft static noise as it connected, which Coop covered up with a cough.
"Alright, but here's the deal. I already have a major headache from this cold, so no talking over each other, please?" Coop said, hoping to god the cats understood his message. There was no response from their end of the walkie talkie, so he thought he'd gotten his point across.
"Sure thing, Coop." Dr. Membrane said with a grin. He led them to the classroom's attached office door and gestured for them to follow him inside. Dr. Abebe followed them from behind and closed the door behind them. Once inside Dr. Membrane casually plopped himself down in his office chair and gestured to the two chairs in front of his desk. As Coop and Dennis went to sit, his partner walked over to him with a folder in hand.
"Thanks, hon." He said as she handed him the folder. He opened it, revealing a small stack of photos. Coop's blood ran cold as pictures of high tech machinery (or rather, the pieces of it) were placed in front of them. As well as a picture of a clearing where an explosion had obviously taken place.
"What's all this? Pictures from a sci-fi movie?" Coop said, trying to sound casual. His voice didn't crack but he was sure the sweat building on his brow was giving him away.
"Welp, right here we have what looks to be a destroyed Catonian ship. It was a real mess too. Took longer than expected to clean up."
Coop looked up at him with wide eyes before fixing his expression back into bemusement.
"A what...? Is this some sort of prank?" Coop said, rolling his eyes. "I get it. I'm the 'crazy cat kid' but I'd have thought a teacher would have better stuff to do other than prank their students."
"Oh, we both know that isn't a prank, Coop."
"So you just expect us to believe you found pictures of a blown up ship? Come on, we're not that gullible." Dennis said, leaning back in his chair.
"Well, I'd hoped we could have just talked truthfully with each other, but if you just want to avoid it… Guess we have no choice."
Suddenly Coop felt cool air touch his scalp as his hat was snatched off his head. His panic spiked as he felt his alien ears stand up straight for the first time in what must have been weeks. He turned around in his seat to see that Dr. Abebe had yanked both his and Dennis' hats off and was looking at them with a smug smile.
"So, now that the cat's out of the bag, forgive the pun there, let's have some honesty."
Coop made panicked eye contact with Dennis as they both scrambled to come up with a way out, but Dr. Abebe was blocking the door and the only other way out would be the window which would mean a three story drop to the street below. Even with this new cat agility he doubted either of them would be able to make that unscaved. It wouldn't mean anything for them to make it out onto the street just to get caught again cause they tried running on a broken ankle.
Shit…!
"W-what?" Dennis said, a nervous smile on his face. "You never heard of a furry before? Cat ears are all the rage these days."
Dr. Abebe let out a chuckle as she stepped behind them to give their ears a quick tug. They both let out a loud yelp of pain.
"They're… glued on tight?" Dennis said lamely.
"Nice try, Dennis, but no dice." Dr. Membrane seemed to be on the verge of laughing as he saw the boys rub at their sore scalps. "Alright, enough games boys. Let's just get to the part where you answer a few of our questions and then you get to go home."
Coop glared at him.
"As if you'd just let us go home after this."
"Well, that's completely dependent on how honest you are with me."
Coop and Dennis made eye contact again before turning to glare back at him.
"Look…" Dr. Membrane said, leaning forward on his desk. "I'm not with the police, CIA, FBI, or any of that. I'm just here to help. Whatever you guys have been doing has obviously gotten out of hand. If you're honest with me maybe we can work out some kind of deal. Make it so everyone here leaves happy."
"A deal?" Dennis said, scowling at him.
"Yup. At this point you two have nothing to lose by telling me the truth, but... " He tapped his finger against the desk where pictures of the cat's tech were still laid out. "You do have a lot to gain. I'm sure all these parts are crazy expensive. It'd be a lot easier if you just got them back instead of trying to macgyver some kitchen appliances into a spaceship."
Coop wasn't sure if he used that example because that's almost exactly what they'd been doing so far, or if he just conveniently happened to hit the nail on the head.
Dammit! He almost wished the cats were here now instead of just listening silently through the walkie talkie.
"You can also ask us some questions, if that'll help you feel more secure." Dr. Abebe said, breaking the silence. "I'm sure we could learn some interesting things about each other."
Coop looked around nervously trying to find another way out. A vent, another window, something! Maybe they could push past Dr. Abebe and make a run for it. But then where would they go? Their addresses were in the school records so it's not like they couldn't just find them again!
"A-alright," Dennis said, interrupting Coop's panicked spiral. His voice shook as he tried to sit straight under the duo's gaze. "You ask us something and we'll ask you something. Deal?"
Dr. Membrane gave them a smile and extended his hand.
"Deal." He shook Dennis's shaky hand then extended it to Coop, who, after a moment of hesitation, shook it as well.
"Alright, let's start with something easy. Who are you two?"
They both blinked at him dumbly.
"What?" Coop said, squinting at him like an idiot.
"I asked, 'who are you two'?"
"Okay, but what do you mean? You know who we are."
"Yes and no. I know who Coop Burtonburger and Dennis Chan are. I also know that they're both normal human teenagers who, from my understanding, didn't grow up with cat ears or tails. So I'll ask again: who are you?"
"We're still Coop and Dennis! We just… look different now."
Dr. Membrane looked at them for a long moment. The glare of light off his glasses plus his height made him look... unsettling. He felt like he was being scanned from head to toe and the sensation was making him antsy.
"Alright then." He said simply. He gestured back to them with a smile. "Your turn"
Coop let out a breath of air and glanced at Dennis who nodded his head.
"And who are you two? Since we're going with introductions."
Membrane nodded and his smile turned smug.
"I'm Dib Membrane. Son of the famous Dr. Membrane, renowned scientist, and occasionally: local alien tracker."
If either of the boys had turned around they'd have seen Abebe giving him a fond smile as she rolled her eyes.
"And behind you is my beautiful partner in crime." He waved his hand at her and she stepped forward to stand beside him. She gave both boys a bright smile.
"My name is Bee, as you already know. We have plenty of experience regarding alien/human relations, so please don't worry. I'm sure we can find a solution that works for both parties."
"What kind of experience?" Dennis asked.
"Ah, ah, ah!" She said, wagging a finger at him. "It's our turn to ask you a question"
Dennis nodded, but looked a bit put out from not having his question answered.
"This… new look of yours. Was it on purpose or an accident?" Dr. Abebe
"An accident." Dennis said.
"Obviously." Coop added.
"Okay then." Membrane took out a small notebook from his pocket and scratched something off with his pen.
"Okay, our turn. What did you mean by human/alien relations?" Coop asked.
The adults looked at each other for a moment, like they were communicating with their eyes alone, before turning to them.
"When I was a kid," Dr. Membrane said, leaning back in his chair. "There was an alien that had snuck itself into my neighborhood and pretended to be a human kid. He was trying to invade the planet and present it to his leaders."
Both of the boys looked at him with wide eyes.
"Thankfully, he kind of sucked at the whole 'invading' thing," He continued, letting out a chuckle. "So, he eventually got taken care of. Now I do some general scans of the country to see if any other aliens are running around. Like the ones your sister found."
"How do you know about that?!"
"Is that your next question? Cause we haven't asked ours yet."
"Yes! I mean, no! I mean…!"
This was all too much…
The two adults in the room seemed to take pity on them though.
"Do you two want a break? We could give you a few minutes." Dr. Abebe- Bee said. She glanced at the clock and so did Coop. It was a little after four in the afternoon. That means they'd only been in this office for half an hour.
"How about we give you guys a five minute break? You can step into the classroom for a bit. But no going out into the hall."
Coop assumed that that was so they wouldn't try to make a break for it, but at this point there was nowhere for them to go anyway.
"We'll stay in here to give you guys some space." Abebe said, opening the door leading to the classroom.
Both boys stood shakily and made their way out into the classroom. They both waited until they saw the office door close behind them before they started talking.
"What the hell are we going to do?!" Dennis said, the hair on his head starting to rise.
"I don't know!" Coop said, throwing his hands into the air. He quickly glanced at the office door and, seeing no one looking back at them, he reached into his pocket and took out the walkie talkie.
"Hey cats, any ideas?!" He whispered urgently into the phone.
"I…I don't..." They heard Kat say from the other line. There was a pause before the other cat suddenly took the phone.
"Just keep them talking," She said. "We need to see if they'll let something slip. Maybe we can figure out where they're keeping our tech."
The boys nodded, though he knew the cats couldn't see them.
"Alright."
There was another pause as Kat took the walkie talking back.
"Whether we like it or not they have us in a bind, but as long as they don't know our location then we can handle this. They don't know where we are and we don't know where they're keeping our equipment. We just need time to find where they're hiding it." Kat said.
"Try asking them how they found us. I doubt they'll just tell you where they're hiding my ship but if I know how they found us I can guess where they're hiding. Certain equipment wouldn't be able to detect us from far away." The other said.
"Okay, got it." Coop said, nodding again.
"Anything else we should ask them?" Dennis asked.
"Try asking what race that invader was. The one he mentioned in his story. There's no record of any other invaders coming to this planet." Kat said
"He might be making it up." Coop said.
"That's what I was thinking. If he already knows about us then he's probably trying to gain some sympathy with his story by drawing parallels between you two."
Coop nodded. It was suspicious how similar their backstories were. What was the likelihood of two completely different people coming across two separate alien invaders? Plus, isn't this guy like, what, almost forty or something? That means an alien invader would have had to have been here well over a decade ago. There's no way some random guy just happened to have the same screwed up circumstances as him growing up.
"Okay, is there anything else we should-"
He quickly hid the walkie talkie back in his pocket as he heard the door to the office open.
"Hey kids. It's been five minutes. Are you ready to come back in?" Dr. Membrane said, leaning against the doorframe.
"U-um, yeah!" Coop stuttered as he double checked that his walkie was securely hidden. Membrane nodded at him and walked back into the office, waiting for them.
"Okay…" Coop said as another nervous spike went through him. Dennis placed a hand on his shoulder and gave him a nod. Coop nodded back and they both made their way back into the office, Mr. Membrane and Bee were both waiting for them at the desk. Membrane was back in his chair while Dr. Abebe was sitting casually on the left edge of the desk, facing them.
"Alright, let's get back to it. I believe it was our turn to ask a question?" Membrane said, twirling his pen in his hand, his notepad in the other.
The boys nodded.
"Alright then. How about you tell me what happened to the Catonians your sister was keeping?"
"The what?" Coop said.
Dr. Abebe took out one of the missing pet flyers Coop and Millie had been handing out the day they met them. She pointed to the picture of Kat and Ms. Kitten.
"The Catonians."
Coop had almost forgotten that that was what the cats were called, and he swore to himself to pay more attention in the future. Or at least take some notes or something…
"They… vanished after the explosion. We've been trying to find them ever since so they could fix what they did to our bodies." Coop said, and he internally congratulated himself on being able to say that with a straight face.
"Hmm…"
"Speaking of which, you've been tracking aliens for a while, right? How did you manage to find us? We could really use your help finding them so we can get back to normal." Dennis quickly added.
"Wasn't too hard. It also happened to be a bit of luck. We had been passing through the area when our scanners picked up on the explosion. Thankfully it had all been contained in that force field, or we'd have had a crazy forest fire on our hands."
"What kind of scanners?"
"Patience, Coop. It's our turn, remember?"
Coop felt a small blush heat his cheeks as he waited for them to ask their question.
""How long have you known your sister's cat was an alien?"
Coop scoffed.
"Since she first got the mangy thing. Wasn't hard to tell after it tried to kill me. Twice!" Coop was sure that Kat wanted to respond to that, and Coop felt a petty sort of satisfaction that the rat had to stay quiet. "You'd think an alien would try harder to blend in, but I guess we got stuck with a dumb one."
"Yeah, that does sound like a dead giveaway."
"Speaking of invaders, what about that one you met? You said one showed up when you were a kid? What was it?" Coop said, leaning forward with interest. Membrane leaned forward as well.
"His name was Zim." He said with a scowl. "He was a failed Irken invader. He spent a little over five years causing trouble on Earth before getting forced back home by his people. In all that time me and my sister were the only ones who knew what he really was."
Coop stared at him for a long moment, trying to find some proof of deceit, but all he saw was annoyance. Either this guy was a good actor, or this was the weirdest coincidence ever. He'd laugh if the circumstances weren't so screwed. The idea of someone else having to go through what he does feels both worrying and comforting. On one hand, he'd give anything to have someone to talk to about this bullshit. For someone else to share his and Dennis' experience so it wasn't just the two of them against the world. On the other hand, the idea of wishing this someone else was pretty horrible.
Did it make him a bad person to hope this wasn't an act?
And five years? He's only dealt with Kat for three and it's been some of the most tiring years of his life. He couldn't imagine dealing with him for five! On top of that this guy had been dealing with an Irken? He might not have the best memory, but he was sure the cats had mentioned some concerning shit about those guys. What had they said? Something about their enemies getting turned to dust? Yeah, if that was even partially true then that sounded like an absolute nightmare…
"And what about you? You've been living with an alien for a few years now. Or at least you used to… How's that been for you?"
"Hell" Him and Dennis said in unison.
"We've been trying to stop that rat from turning the planet into a giant litterbox or turning the rainforest into a private scratching post for years now and this...'' Coop said, gesturing to his ears. "Is just the latest batch of bullshit we've had to deal with."
"At this point we've been clawed at, shot with lasers, or nearly crushed by boulders on a practically daily basis. So, we've gotten used to getting attacked, but this is a new kind of weird" Dennis added.
Membrane nodded.
"I can relate, and I'm sorry you've both had to deal with this on your own. I'm sure it's been a lot, to say the least." He said, and Coop was honestly thrown by how genuinely sympathetic he sounded. "Though, I have to say, this does make things a lot easier for us."
"What do you mean?" Coop said, tensing up.
"Well, we had two main theories about you two. We figured by the destroyed ship that the first Catonian" He said, tapping the picture of Kat on the flyer. "Had called for some back up. After catching a glimpse of your claws while you were fighting that boy, we weren't sure if you had been experimented on, or if you had been replaced all together."
Coop felt his stomach drop.
"Replaced?"
"Yes. We toyed with the idea that you were just Catonians using the real Coop and Dennis as a cover, but we're both sure that's not the case."
Dr. Abebe put a hand on his shoulder and gave them a gentle smile.
"We're both relieved that you boys are okay. Especially after everything else you've been through." She said.
Coop shrugged her hand off and looked between them with scrutiny.
"And what was the other theory?"
"The other theory is the one we're leaning towards now. That all of this…" He said gesturing to them. "Was an experiment gone wrong, and you two were the unfortunate victims."
Coop felt himself relax a bit. Were they really going to believe them? No strings attached?
"And that's why we want to offer you a deal…"
And now he was tense again…
"What deal?" The boys said in unison.
"Simple: We protect you from any government involvement, give you access to our lab, and generally help you figure your way out of this. In exchange, the Catonians come with us."
Coop felt the floor sink below him and he struggled to keep his expression blank.
"What do you mean? We can't just give them to you. We have no idea where they are."
"Mhm…"
"Really!"
"I might specialize in aliens, but I know enough about humans to know just how smart you boys are. You've held out for years with a hostile alien in your house. I'm sure you're both smart enough to know when a truce is needed." He stood up from his desk and rounded it to sit in front of them. "You couldn't get yourselves back to normal on your own, and with their ship gone, I'm sure the Catonians were just as desperate. A truce would be the best move. I commend you both for being smart about it"
Coop felt his mouth go dry as he tried to come up with another excuse, but Dennis beat him to it.
"And how do we know you aren't gonna just dissect them or something? Then we're stuck like this forever."
"Well, for one thing, if we had planned to dissect them we wouldn't be talking to you right now. We'd have just gone straight to that neat little treehouse of yours and grabbed them."
"How did you-!?"
"We've been keeping a close eye on you guys for the past two weeks or so."
The boys looked at each other and then back to the scientist with trepidation. There was no way out now. They both knew that this deal was just a formality at this point. They could have turned all of them in to the government from the start and there's nothing they could have done.
"Everything we said to you would also apply to the Catonians. They wouldn't be our prisoners. As long as they cooperate they'll have full access to our lab, be protected from the authorities, and have a comfortable place to stay."
"We're only offering this for your own safety." Abebe added, her face full of concern. "You've done well so far but if it had been a policeman who'd seen your fight with those boys and not us, there's no telling what could have happened."
"Our job is to keep the planet safe from invaders and establish a healthy dialogue between humans and alien species. If we can all cooperate with each other then that's what we want to do. Besides..." Membrane kneeled down so he was at eye level with them. "Wouldn't it be nice to have some help for a change?"
That struck a chord in Coop and he suddenly just felt tired. Tired of the hiding, of fighting, and of feeling like the weight of the world was sitting on his shoulders. Sure, he's had Dennis with him from the beginning, but even then they're both just two kids…
On top of that, as petty as it sounded, he desperately just wanted a bit of his old life back. No more worrying about two aliens living in his backyard. No more sharing his personal space with two enemies. Maybe he could just rely on someone else for a change…
"...Deal"
Author's notes: This is one of my longest chapters yet and it consists of a lot of dialogue. It's not my favorite chapter, but it is necessary for the rest of the story.