Disclaimer Harry Potter and all its characters belong to J.K. Rowling
write, write, write… Oh, wait what is this… another review! How wonderful, well now I have to get this next chapter out post haste, yes, yes, yes. thank you to the latest of my new reviewers, nlou, you are appreciated. Now for the chapter, please read and enjoy.
Chapter 9 – Thoughts
The strange inky black substance that Harry was submerged in had finally returned to a restful state after destroying the abominable parasite that had spawned from within himself. Harry felt exhausted, his body shook from the effort to move, more emotional exhaustion than anything physical as his body was in fact still a mangled charred corpse. But it had been worth it, he was whole again his gift and himself reunited as one being. Harry still could not shake the sensation of rising as the water pushed down on him, but he was still on the floor of the pool. It didn't matter, Harry thought as he let himself collapse on his rear, a fake sigh doing little to alleviate his stressed state of mind. His gift was quick to react to his distress and appeared as swimming squiggles that danced enchantingly through the water, a helpful distraction.
Harry simply let his mind drift, forgoing thoughts to do with strange albino creatures and weird, beautiful beaches. Instead, Harry's thoughts drifted towards the fact that he was almost surely dead, the state of his body and memories of the incident all but proving it. His gift seemed to halt in its distracting display instead flowing over him like a shawl, its light touch on his… skin? Wait why did it feel like his gift was flowing over his skin, glancing to his arm to be doubly sure Harry was befuddled to see his bony burnt limb cloaked by his precious gift.
Strange? Harry questioned silently to himself, his bony finger brushing through the misty cowl surrounding his body, the phantom feeling of the skin causing a shiver to travel down his spine. Harry was unable to be preoccupied with the mystery of his body for more than a moment when the sound of moving water began to grow. Harry shot his head up, anxious due to having just put down one abomination that appeared due to this black pool, his gift prickled sharing the sentiment. The noise grew and grew, but still, Harry could not locate the source in the black depths… until he looked up that was. The surface was rushing towards him with uncanny speed and Harry was only just able to put his arms over his head before he was slammed onto his back. Harry was most grateful for the fact he did not need to breathe anymore, as the blow surely would have knocked the wind from his lungs.
Do I really want to get up… no I don't? Harry was beginning to become rather exasperated at this situation and while he was doing his best to push on, the stress was building. It was only because his gift began to pull him off the muddy ground that Harry rose to his feet- foot and a half. Harry stroked the air letting his gift dance through his fingers expressing its happiness. Huh, funny I don't feel it's happiness, to be fair at least one of us is happy, Harry thought to himself his mindset still rather pessimistic. His gift snapped Harry from his thoughts as it snarled at the air and Harry glanced around the room wondering what could have agitated it so quickly, the answer was a whole lot of corpses. The room was filled with these giant figures, each seemed to be reaching for something in the same general direction, their bodies were huge. Harry was small, even now, but these things, they were maybe four meters tall perhaps more it was hard to get an idea as most were on their knees. All of them were headless, it seemed that something had killed them all by decapitation.
Harry let his gift flare around his hands, his mind was moving at a mile a minute. Harry couldn't seem to catch his breath, he was tossed from one instance to the next. This wasn't even the same room where he had entered the pool, this one was far more intimidating. Harry was unsure how to proceed, looking down to his hands still enveloped fully by his agitated gift, it was there that an idea sparked. Closing his eyes Harry focused, in the pool he had used a command, one he had never used before to boot, to slay the parasite. So maybe I can do it again, Harry thought as he let his gift spread its/their senses throughout the room. It started to happen again, a voice… no it wasn't a voice, it was like stray thoughts that were scattered in the air itself. Trying to ignore the absurdity of that Harry let the stray disembodied thoughts drift towards him. Time seemed to drift away but as reality phased out, a story revealed itself to Harry, it was hazy, like watching tv through a frost-covered window… but Harry still managed to get some of it.
There were things, people, running around.
Panic, Fear, Terror.
They were scared of something, it was horrifying.
Beautiful!
Wait! No, the situation was a horrifying thing, there were so many voices now. Speaking? Screaming… no wait a minute those are Commands.
Concept, Communicate, Induce.
They all communicated with Commands, the people used their gifts to literally impart their thoughts and desires to each other in a way their words never could… it was beautiful.
Harry was awestruck, he didn't know what was going on or where he was, but what he did know was that he was no longer alone. These strange, tall people had gifts like him, and they used them to talk to one another letting their gifts connect them and share their very beings. Harry walked over to one of the corpses to get a closer look at it, as the stray thoughts continued to be plucked from the air by his gift which had spread itself about like a net of flower petals. It was tall, dressed in what appeared to be a long flowing fabric that weaved around its limbs and hooked over its stump of a neck. Harry rand his hand over the fatal wound, a thought striking his head like lightning as it did.
Huh, not decapitated.
The people here, whatever they were did not have heads like him, rather they had these strange neck-like appendages crowned with teeth or horn-like things.
Spires.
Harry nodded his head, pulling his hand back slowly and carefully, he walked around the room and saw that all these tall, alien people had the same spires growing from their necks. Harry couldn't begin to imagine what it would be like not to have a head… but then again, he was the only one here that had one.
Does that make me the strange one? Would I have been a freak even amongst people like me? Harry thought to himself depressingly, the sensation of loneliness wrapping around his centre like a familiar if unwanted leech.
Unique, Special, Equal.
The thoughts boomed in Harry's head dislodging the sensations of loneliness and doubt, actually, it even knocked Harry onto the ground from the actual intent in the thoughts themselves. Each thought was different but the same, and from hundreds of individuals.
Wait… Hundreds?
Teach. Impart. Knowledge. Illuminate. Illuminate. Light. Bright. Shine.
A Command, ha-ha it worked, yes! ok, let's try this alright I/we got this.
"Illuminate." The Command boomed around the room and Harry realised where the noise came from instantly, it was his gift. His gift was pronouncing the Commands for him, uttering them out of the air itself. Suddenly Harry's gift still dispersed throughout the room like a net of rose petals lit up like a beacon. It was a pure white light that blasted about the room Harry found himself in, and in that instance, Harry felt very insignificant. The room was… words could not describe its majesty, it was colossal, cavernous, gigantic, it was a massive oval like hall, with an opening in the ceiling, but the absolute strangest thing was the corpses. Hundreds… no thousands maybe more even, all of them the numerous bodies were all facing the same direction. Turning to match their direction Harry saw a titanic door, bigger than any building Harry had ever laid eyes on, even the ones in London. Harry spun on the spot looking about the cavern his eyes tracing the numerous collapsed, reaching bodies.
My god.
Your God Is Not HERE!
The thoughts smashed into Harry's gift and sent Harry sprawling into the ground, it was more of the black sand from outside on the beach, but it did little to cushion the blow, his body shook from the impact. It had physically stunned the boy, it felt like the black water stuff from before had just smashed into his body from all directions.
Sorry.
…
Harry pushed himself back up pitifully his bones crunching slightly as he did, his head still dizzy rose to look at the roof of the cavernous hall he was in, and there Harry felt more shock somehow find room to join the rest of the surprise and confusion in his mind. The three holes in space spewing a black substance he had seen on the beach were all positioned directly above him, each one belching a massive amount of black stuff that crashed silently around the hall but not a drop of it actually coming through the open ceiling. Looking into those pitch-black holes in space made harry feel something, it was like –
Look away, child… Now!
Another impact smacking Harry's head down, as a thousand simultaneous thoughts in unison, chastised him.
"Curious, Untethered Souls, Riled, ******."
"Silence, Do Not Distract, Avoid, Divert."
"Ignore."
Three sets of commands slammed into Harry once again, these were unlike the ambient thoughts his gift received. No, these actually affected everything around him, as well as his gift. It was just like outside, a whole bunch of concepts and foreign will smashing against his mind and body as well as some other indescribable thing. But this time Harry was whole, the Commands did not get stuck in him but rather passed over and through Harry as his gift shunted them aside. The act of not letting them stick to himself sent a wave of overbearing exhaustion that quite literally rattled Harry's bones.
Hear, Understand, Conceive.
Harry was unsure what those thoughts meant but had to put them on the 'sort the hell out later list', a list that was quickly becoming way too long but was definitely necessary for his frayed sanity. Harry had clearly heard them this time, the Commands had come from behind the titanic door, there were others like him there and he may be a charred corpse, but he would die another horrible death before he missed this opportunity.
Caution, Wait, Patience, Think.
Harry ignored the spattering of thoughts and heaved his abused corpse back to its mangled legs. With a more strenuous effort, he began to limp forwards as more thoughts began to flitter about the air above him.
No, Halt, Impossible.
Stray thoughts were no deterrent, Harry began to walk with a wonky gait, not quickly but far faster than his previous limp. As he gained speed the thoughts became increasingly agitated, more unique thoughts appeared, conflicting ones, louder ones. Harry ignores them all, his focus solely on those massive doors at the end of the hall.
Cease, Go.
Silence, Scream.
Aggravated, Pleased.
A hundred little spats like that occurred simultaneously, Harry paid them little mind his speed only increasing and now Harry was practically jogging with his lopsided strides devouring the distance to the doorway. The most nerve-wracking thing was the closer Harry got the bigger the doors appeared, Harry really hoped that they were just a design choice and not for somethings use.
Amusement.
Hush you.
It had taken quite a while to make it to the end of the hall but when he did Harry stood determined with a storm of whispering thoughts behind him as he stared at the gargantuan doors. They were like individual towers, each reaching so high he was sure they would have made some mountains feel diminutive.
The Gates of Eternity.
Cool name.
Appreciation.
You're welcome.
Harry approached the door his diminutive form gazing in awe at the intricate designs carefully carved on the doors, there were images, glyphs, sigils, runes, hieroglyphs, and writing. Stories and tales, fables and history, myths, and legends… it was breathtaking. Harry let his hand graze the door, its smooth texture like glass as his bony hand somehow translated the sensation of touch. Harry closed his eyes and listened carefully to the rampant wild thoughts scattered about the room.
The four.
The beginning's ever equal with the ends.
Protect and destroy… create and unmake.
Little children say your prayers.
I miss food.
Why is he here?
The lords still weep for the lost.
The Unborn are separated.
The room continued babbling and Harry was happy to listen as he gazed upon scenes from stories he couldn't understand, but as the stray thoughts continue to ramble, they slowly began to fall silent. Without realising Harry was once again in a silent cavernous hall filled with corpses, by the time he realised he had no clue when the thoughts had ended. Forcefully dragging his vision away from the doors Harry looked behind him and saw that the macabre hall was once again darkened.
"Illuminate," Harry ordered his gift mentally, but to his displeasure, there was no response, his gift failing to somehow light up the unnaturally dark hall. Caution and fear seeped into Harry's exposed bones, his curiosity quickly tempered by his previous experiences to do with this strange place. Harry's nerves were not put to ease when a figure began to float towards him its form clearly intangible and hovering about half a foot off the ground.
The figure appeared to be the same type of creature as the rest of the corpses, its body tall and intimidating as its headless form seemed to gaze at Harry patiently as one of its arm-like limbs gestured to something. Harry was too distracted by absorbing the sight in front of him to bother looking at where the creature pointed, his mind trying to memorise everything about it. It was beautiful, moonlight given shape, its body had donned ropes that looked like woven starlight and each of the spires adorning its neck were carved with beautifully intricate designs that Harry just knew instinctively meant something. The creature kept pointing while Harry stared at it, unflinchingly.
Child.
Harry was snapped from his observation by the thought, singular thought that is, that slipped into his own mind. It was as if every other thought had silenced themselves to make this one sound cacophonous in their stead.
Child, you cannot linger, the steps have been taken, the echoes long since silenced… you must tread a new path out of the oblivion you have found yourself in. You will find no family nor covenant here, we are but broken souls and twisted memories.
What are you? Are you like me? Where is this? Harry thought sporadically, desperate for some answers to stem the worsening of his confusion. He was unsure if the thing could hear his thoughts and its response did not assuage his worries.
Broken child slaughtered young, you must make haste… please do not let yourself spoil and rot here with the rest of us. Tragedy should not share its misery with victims undeserving. You command the soul of creation, speak with your pure voice and magic will bend to your will. This gate is but stone and legend, like all legend it will bend to the proclamation of your will and stone is but an eager servant to magic and intent.
Harry, with trepidation, turned back to face the door, the colossal, titanic carved doors that sealed him in this grim room littered with thousands of dead. Harry pressed his gift against it, his gift seeped into the strange abnormal stone and felt the depth and thickness of the monolith like structures.
… I can't, it's too thick, too big for me to move. Harry thought shamefully the true grand size of the doors filling his heart with doubt.
…
The creature didn't respond to Harry's thoughts, so Harry decided to try something else. With a second of calm to centre himself, Harry prepped another Command for his gift to enact, "Can Not." The Command came out splotchy, it was less a Command for his gift to enact upon the world and more just an expression of his intent, a False Command if you would.
… You poor child, seeped with doubt, trapped in a macabre and abused corpse. What has happened to hide from you the majesty you could wreak with but a whispered word, what has sheered the dominion you hold over your world and split you from your gift. Truly you require the purest of salvation for you to not see the horror of the mausoleum, the necropolis, the grave you find your twisted body in.
The strange ethereal creatures' thoughts hurt Harry deeply, its thoughts were laced with heartbreak, which in turn seeped into Harry and allowed Harry to understand just how upsetting the thing found his current state to be. While the words and ideas may not have made sense the emotion behind it most certainly felt like a punch to the gut for the small child. With a pained whimper in his own mind, Harry felt a presence lay a portion of itself upon him. Harry twisted his head around to see the alien being laying a colossal hand upon his upper arm, the hand almost encompassing his entire right shoulder as well. That contact acted as a bridge, and Harry began to understand some of the mysteries that had plagued him since the beech. The world he was on was a new one entirely and he most certainly should not be here, this entire world was a macabre world plagued by death and grieving the loss of its soul. If he stayed, he would be another corpse amongst untold billions.
"How?" Harry Commanded the question so it reverberated around the two of them, hoping that the question projected through his gift would be understandable to this abnormal being. Harry could not tell with his sight, but the creature almost seemed to radiate comfort and hope at Harry's query.
You are young, you think this labour too grand, but you have already overcome the nature of death to stand before this gate. You will open these doors just as you have opened any other. You will push on it… no, we will push on it. Come young undead, help another of your ilk get some fresh air, into this musty old crypt.
Harry smiled at the confidence the creature had in him and turned back to the door. It was big, enormously big but it wouldn't stop him. It was thick, so thick it could easily have been its own building but still, it would not stop him. Harry took a few steps back to better see the whole door, he eased his mind and found his centre his gift beginning to flow around him like a line of tension unspooling. Harry opened his eyes and looked at his hands, they were damaged and missing fingers, but he knew that there was power in them. In a motion, he practised maybe hundreds of times Harry ran his hand over and through his gift letting it slide and coil about him.
More.
More.
More of his gift loosened from his core and filled the air, a breeze began to gather around Harry as he pictured the times, he had cast his Push Command before. The emotion, intent, will, and power he suffused into the act would overshadow all those previous times. Word, image, channel, focus, want, desire and direct… I can do this.
We are here child, go free yourself of our misery.
Now… Push!
At the orders of the spectral being whose voice echoed in his head with singular intensity, Harry pulled his gift back in like an implosion. It dragged all the air in the room causing a twister of black sand and dust to circulate about him violently. Harry's gift seemed to just keep coming through, Harry felt overwhelmed… and then he realised it wasn't just his gift, all those disembodied thoughts, the intent and will of all of them flowing through him in a unified effort. A smile would have surely made itself apparent on Harry's mutilated skull had he still a mandible with which to do it.
Now child! You can do it, flee this accursed crypt! Push!
"PUSH!"
Harry's gift fired out like a cannon blast, impacting the monolithic structures masquerading as doors. The twister that had formed around him was splattered by the much grander force of his Push Command bouncing off the stone door and blasting all the dust and sand away in a wave of pure energy. One thing Harry took note of was that none of the corpses seemed affected by the raging torrents of wind caused by his Push, this thought was quickly pushed to the back of his mind as Harry refocused his efforts on opening the Gates of Eternity.
Harry felt his gift just keep coming, will and intent smashing into stone and myth as the doors began to make and rumbling creaking noise. Harry felt a smile come to his face but fear quickly flittered to replace it. Despite all his effort, the door would not budge further than groaning at the force being exerted on it. Harry was going to fail, he was going to be trapped in this cavernous crypt, another corpse amongst thousands. The doubt seeped into his core and his Command began to sputter, slamming into the door helplessly. But as the fear seeped in it brought memories… horrible memories, a cupboard under the stairs, burning pain and fear, failure, loss… loneliness. His gift was failing, it just didn't have the strength with Harrys faltering drive and began to heave ceaselessly trying anything to snap them/him out of it. Harry felt the terrifying creep of loneliness seep into his hollow chest and with it the memory of his failure. How he failed Roselyn, just like he was about to fail here… but as he thought of Roselyn, he remembered the reason she was there that night, remembered who hurt her, whose fault it was, who's fault everything was. His loneliness, pain, hardship, loss… all of it… all of it was his fault… his fault! HIS FAULT! DURSLEY!
"PUSH!"
His will renewed Harry pulled his left arm back and launched a second Push from it while the right maintained the first Command. The second Command slammed into the doors alongside the first renewing his efforts and revitalising his gift in its/their/his quest to open the colossal gate blocking him/them. The Gates of Eternity groaned loudly, the noise seeming to vibrate the entire hall and Harry watched in awe as they opened to reveal light from within that began to pierce through the small but growing crack in between them.
Push corpse child! Push harder! You can do it! Walk in the path of beings who predate the stars and tread on the ground un walked by the meek and the uninspired. Open the way to those who called our lord brother!
With a final silent grunt of exertion as Harry felt his very bones buckle from the backlash of his own Commands, the door crept wider and with a shout of endurance and effort from thousands of unified voices aiding him… the Gates of Eternity swung wide drowning the entire world in piercing light that blinded Harry as rushing wind deafened him.
…
Harry felt awful he was in more pain than ever before, and his brain felt as if a blanket of razor wire and glass shards was wrapped around it. Slowly his vision came back to him, the confusion over how that worked considering he knew for a fact that his eyes were destroyed seemed like a very distant concern. Harry was face down again, but this time there was no soothing waves to greet him, rather there was silence. Eyes looking for something Harry gazed at the floor upon which he laid and saw his face for the first time. It was as bad as he had thought earlier, the chard bone, the blackened flesh, now with one of his eyes containing a burnt-out destroy eyeball and the other a hollow hole that showed only darkness.
I look like a walking fire safety warning. Grim thoughts only driving him to rise quicker Harry quickly tried to lift himself using his arms, only to tilt over and face plant into the ground. His vision lethargically dragged itself over to see his left arm was missing, only parts of his upper arm were still there, and they were but the broken remains from where the rest of his arm had clearly been snapped off. Bugger, I am getting worse… at this rate, I'll be just a talking head.
With a more cautious effort, Harry rose back to his shaking damaged legs, and let his eyes trace around the room. He had no idea how he got here, the Gates of Eternity were simply gone, he was in some type of circle made of a shadowy reflective substance. The circle appeared to be in a void filled with swilling black smog that flowed around the air at a multitude of elevations. Everything appeared to be dimly lit but he could not tell from where, it was very dreamlike in actuality. The only other noticeable thing about wherever he happened to be, was the staircase that was attached to the circle he had awoken on. Limping over, his whole frame shook as he did so, Harry approached the stairs and began to ascend them seeing no other course of action available to him.
Harry marched up the stairs tiredly, each step felt like it took more effort, his body becoming heavier and heavier, the strain of ascending slowly pushing him down. His gift provided no relief with its exhausted state from opening the Gates of Eternity had it sitting in his chest like a lethargic rock only adding to his burden. Eager to take his mind off of his new trial Harry glanced over the edge of the staircase and saw only a black abyss beneath him that loomed hungrily. Now regretting ever having looked at what laid below him, Harry really wished that the narrow staircase made of strange reflective unknown material came with a safety rail of strange reflective unknown material. Being even more careful Harry pushed on, taking just a little more time with his steps as he continued to ascend the seemingly endless climb that laid before him.
He did not know how long he climbed those strange steps.
He did not know how far he rose.
He only knew exhaustion and hope in equal measure.
But still, the small broken corpse child climbed them aimlessly.
It felt like an honest eternity when he finally saw what he believed to be the end of his newest trial. His body shook, it felt like it weighed more than it ever should, its mass surely having magically multiplied. He had lost a few more pieces of himself as he climbed up the stairs, some toes off of his still whole foot, three ribs and a small collection of bones that fell out of his pelvic bone. But after what seemed like an impossible climb through a dream-like state Harry made it to the top and saw before him another doorway. The black smog was thick here, it cloaked the entirety of the door and inhibited Harry's ability to see what laid on the other side. With a limp that was all Harry could do to stop himself from falling over he approached the doorway.
He laid his only remaining hand upon that thick cloudy smog that blocked his way. It felt physical it was so thick and as Harry pushed against it, he felt the smog seem to give slightly, his hand pushing into its depth. Limping forward a bit more Harry leaned his whole body upon the door the smog giving more until Harry felt his arm pass through it. With more speed than the boy had been expecting the rest of Harry's body was quick to follow… too quick. Harry fell through the smog his body exiting out the other side only to find a precipice. He struggled and heaved backwards with all his might but was far too tired, he grasped at the air with a flailing arm but found no purchase.
He fell.
Harry fell, screaming within his mind as he fell into the dark abyss that he had ascended over for so long, all his effort seemingly wasted. With a terror chilling him to his core and his gift coiling in his chest in an attempt to comfort him/them, Harry cascaded through that bleak black air and down towards the endless depths that opened up below him. He was reunited with his despair, sense of loss, and hopelessness at the disparity of the situation. All his trials to get here to try and work out what was going on seeming to amount to nothing. Harry let all of it drift away, a strange calm coming over his mind as his broken body fell downwards, the wind making strange noises as it passed through his body and over his bones. Harry fell and as he did time lost its meaning… space followed shortly after… and still, he fell. Harry plummeted down with an alien and abnormal serenity about the entire situation suffusing itself to his deepest depths.
I tried.
Harry let his eyes slide open for some reason, what he saw was a horizon tinged black with space devouring space. He fell from an abyssal sky to crash into an abyssal ocean, trading one for the other and gaining nothing all the same. With an explosive splash, Harry lost his sense of consciousness once again and reality truly parted from him.
I really did try.
That's it, that's chapter nine… Harry's eerie adventure continues to deepen, the confusion he feels ramping up as he begins to lose more and more of his grasp of reality. But honestly, what is this he is experiencing a psychotic break, a view of the afterlife… or something else, something extraordinary.
To find out you will just have to keep reading won't you, my amazing readers hehe. As always thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it, I look forward to getting the next chapter out for your enjoyment.
Until next time.