Standing in front of the huge windows in the living room, hugging herself and staring out into the pouring rain, Hinata swallowed the choking lump beginning to form in her throat.
Goosebumps ran up her arms and her stomach churned as she clung onto the remnants of her sanity.
Fat raindrops streamed down the glass of the window and Hinata couldn't help but stare at her own faint reflection, the wetness looking as though tears were streaming down her face.
Perhaps they were.
As she fixated her gaze on the big, lavender eyes of her own face painted on the window, memories swirled in her mind, making her lips tremble and prompting her nails to dig deep into the skin of her arms.
The distinctive smell of smoke, sweat, and blood filled her nose as the image of a destroyed Hyuuga compound crawled in front of her eyes. The mental image of pale, stiff bodies being sprawled all over the ground with arms and legs bent unnaturally squeezed Hinata's stomach. High-pitched cries and screams roared in her ears and she was unable to silence them.
She shut her eyes closed, hoping it would chase the gruesome scene away, but the motion only intensified the liveliness of the memory, every little detail stubbornly latching onto Hinata's reeling mind.
In her memory, she was hurrying toward a group of shaking, crying women and children, hunched over each other.
"What happened?" she had to yell through the veil of their loud sobbing for them to notice her.
A woman with cheeks blemished by smears of blood and dirt looked up at her—her red, cried-out lavender eyes bore into Hinata's confused ones accusingly as she stammered, "They told you they would come. They told you, but you didn't care. Look where you got us."
A chill running down her spine, Hinata drew in a sharp breath. "Where is my father? I need to talk to him."
Another woman let out a cry of agony, burying her face into her hands. The painful scene caused Hinata's heart to skip a beat. Her eyes flickered back at the woman who had spoken a few seconds ago. She was still glaring at Hinata with narrowed eyes, her nose wrinkling in disgust and anger.
"Where's my father?" Hinata asked again, a foreboding bolt of electricity flashing through her body from head to toe. "Where's Hanabi?"
"Look where you got us," the woman repeated, pointing a finger somewhere behind Hinata's back.
Hinata spun around, frantically looking around until her eyes found two familiar figures laying on the ground. Her legs brought her closer without her commanding them to move until she was looming over two rigid, ghost-white bodies dressed in clothing she immediately recognized despite the fabric being torn to shreds. Their arms were placed in a respectful pose, crossed over their chests, and their eyes were closed.
Strangely, the first thing that passed through Hinata's mind was that Hanabi's fine features couldn't be ruined even by the huge, deep cut running down the length of her face, from her forehead down to her jaw, cutting through her right eye.
Her lunch threatening to soon reappear on the floor, Hinata crumbled down in the muddy ground. A drawled shriek escaped her lips as she hunched over the lifeless corpses, not caring about all the blood that got onto her own clothes.
Time seemed to stop as Hinata squeezed his father's arm and raked her fingers through Hanabi's long, brown hair.
"I should've been here," she whispered into the deaf ears of her sister. "I'm so sorry. I should've been here."
Tears streamed down her face, dripping onto the thin, delicate skin of Hanabi's unmoving cheeks. The wetness mixed with dried blood, morphing into a glowing crimson red.
Hinata's chest tightened, her breathing steadily became ragged, and her heart hammered against the skin of her chest faster with each passing moment. She pushed a palm against her breasts in an attempt to slow her maddened heart down, but to no avail. The world was spinning around her and abruptly, she noticed that her mouth was parted in a continuous, excruciating screech.
"Hinata."
Two strong arms wrapped around her body and Hinata's first instinct was to fight them off. She struggled to get away from the firm hold, but as a warm chest pressed against her back, her body grew feeble. Her muscles relaxing, she melted into the protecting hold.
"I'm right here with you," the deep voice of her husband whispered into her ear, and Hinata's world blackened.
The doomed day was followed with much sorrow—vigils and funerals were held but there was no time to grieve. One of the noblest clans in the village had nearly been wiped out—only a handful of Hyuuga remained, most of them were children or housewives, incapable of fighting.
Hinata sat through all the clan meetings with the remaining elders of the clan, but she wasn't able to concentrate on anything that was discussed. Rebuilding, training, and leading decisions were made, but Hinata couldn't let go of seeing the deep wrinkles etched onto the sad, pale face of her dead father.
She became the head of the Hyuuga—a once-prominent clan that now consisted of roughly a few dozen members. Reluctantly, she took on the role that seemed to be her destiny—apparently, one couldn't escape the fate that was written for them ever since the minute they were born.
Neji would've been a better leader. Only if he had survived the Fourth Ninja War.
"Uchiha disgrace," a woman spat in front of her as she and Hiroki were walking toward the meeting hall of the rebuilt, but considerably smaller Hyuuga compound a year after the tragedy.
Hiroki reached for the sword attached to his back, but Hinata grabbed his wrist, smiling down at him. "She's family."
"But—" Hiroki started but when his mother gently squeezed his wrist, he pressed his lips together.
People glared at them from the protective darkness of their houses as they trailed down the narrow, dusty street. As Hinata slid the door to the meeting hall open, a drop of sweat streamed down her forehead. The elders of the clan shifted their beady eyes toward the newcomers, their foreheads crinkling.
Hiroki unsurely turned his head toward his mother who signaled him with a small nod of her head to sit down. Taking a deep breath, the boy lowered himself onto one of the soft pillows with the Hyuuga emblem embroidered on it. He unclutched his sword from his back and laid it neatly in front of him. His shoulders rolled back as he placed his hands on his knees and lifted his dark eyes that now lacked any insecurity.
The elders followed his every movement with clear loathing etched onto their features. Hinata sat down next to Hiroki and pointed her gaze at the wrinkled Hyuugas in front of them.
"Welcome," one of the men spoke up after clearing his throat. "It's quite unexpected to see Uchiha-kun here."
With a small bow of her head, Hinata forced her tone to sound polite as she stated, "He will accompany me on clan meetings from now on."
All the elders' eyebrows raised high on their foreheads. They didn't need to say anything for Hinata to know what they were wondering about, so she continued, "He turned ten last week. By the rules of our clan, he has every right to be here as the next heir."
A woman leaped onto her feet so fast that Hinata could swear she heard one of her bones cracking. The elder pointed a finger toward the current clan head as she spat, "You're making a mockery of us, aren't you?"
Hinata kept her head low, but from the corner of her eyes, she spotted Hiroki's hands curling into tight fists.
"Not at all, Sanako-sama," she answered in the most respectful way possible. "By birth, Hiroki is the heir to the Hyuuga."
"An Uchiha can't lead the Hyuuga," Sanako hissed.
Hinata raised her head and stared into the lavender eyes dulled by old age. She swallowed back the remark about the Hyuuga already being led by an Uchiha. Instead, she parted her lips to voice a more respectful response when another elder cut her off.
"Answer one question for us, Hinata-sama." As he spoke, his reverent words were in deep contrast with his indignant tone of voice. "If you intend to treat your offspring as your heir, who will lead the Uchiha when the time comes? Uchiha-kun in front of us is also heir to the Uchiha clan. Or do you plan to have him hand over leading the Uchiha in favor of his brother?"
"With all due respect, Eiji-sama, we're talking about two nearly extinct clans. The Uchiha and the Hyuuga sprout from the same root. It's time to braid the fates of our clans together once more under Hiroki's eventual leadership."
Hinata could still clearly hear the affronted protests blaring into her ears.
"I'm home," she flinched as an exuberant voice dragged her out of reliving her memories.
"Welcome home, Onii-san!" Hinata heard Himawari's thumping footsteps as she ran to greet her older brother.
Hinata exhaled deeply and pried her nails off her skin, rubbing the aching, red hollows with her palms as she walked out to the hallway to welcome Boruto home. His blond hair was a shade darker from being soaking wet and rainwater dripped from his clothes, pooling in a puddle under his shoes. The sunny grin he wore on his face as he placed a quick kiss onto Himawari's forehead hindered Hinata from getting angry with him for making a mess.
"How was your mission?" she asked him with a genuine smile.
"Boring and too easy. I want some real action already," he sighed as he kicked off his shoes and sauntered toward the living room, leaving behind small ponds of raindrops.
Hinata's lungs burned as though someone had clung onto them, trying to prevent her from breathing—she silently prayed to all the existing gods to bless Boruto with missions that steered clear of pain, suffering, and death.
She picked up the shoes Boruto had kicked off to put them neatly next to each other. A memory fragment of Aiko putting away her toys and proudly showing her parents the tidily organized dolls and plushies sitting on the shelves popped into her mind and she couldn't hide her smile.
As she stared at the wet shoes, she spotted blond hair from the corner of her eyes. Curiosity taking over her mind, Hinata turned to look at Boruto who had already changed into dry clothes. His hair was once again spiky and sunny blond.
Briefly, Hinata wondered for how long exactly she had been staring dumbly at the shoes.
Boruto fixated his gaze on the floor and shifted his weight from one leg to another repeatedly.
"I'm sorry," he blurted out with a pink blush tinting his cheeks.
For a moment, Hinata didn't understand what he was apologizing about. Although, once she remembered that the last time they talked was when Boruto accused her and Naruto of lying, she pretended to brush a nonexistent smear away from her face to muffle a chuckle. "I'm not angry with you. Don't worry about it."
His wide eyes flickered at her. "Are you not?"
"I am not. I'm proud of you, actually. A shinobi must never drop their guard, right?" She winked at him. "It's better to be suspicious than being caught off guard by a trick."
Boruto only stared at her, the blush on his cheeks deepening as a strange mixture of pride, shame, and joy whirled in his eternally blue eyes.
"Thanks, Mom," he mumbled before he turned on his heels and stormed into the living room.
A smile tugging at the corners of her lips, Hinata followed him. Her eyes quickly found Himawari sitting at the dinner table, coloring yet another drawing of hers. After peeking over her shoulder to check her art—she was coloring a drawing of her family—Hinata's gaze searched for Boruto. She spotted him sitting in the armchair with his gaming box in his hands.
As he waved at her with a wide grin, Hinata's lips quirked up into a small smile. The boy may have been brash and smart-mouthed, but he loved his mother dearly.
An abrupt desire to get to know Boruto more prompted Hinata to stand next to him, watching as he smashed the buttons on the noisy box. She watched the movements on the screen attentively but couldn't figure out what the point was exactly.
The words tore from her mouth before she could stop them. "How does it work?"
Boruto snapped his head up in surprise, but he explained, "First, you have to create a ninja avatar. Then you make it strong and win battles with it. It's super fun."
"So, basically, you pretend to be a ninja while you're actually a ninja. Interesting," she remarked with squinted eyes, and the comment made Boruto put down the game.
Hinata glanced at him, puzzlement making her bite in the inside of her cheeks. She might've said something wrong without meaning to, but the words had rolled off her tongue too easily, leaving behind common sense.
"I mean," she started, trying to salvage her fragile relationship with her new son, "why would you play as a ninja when you could actually train? You don't need to pretend you're a ninja when you already have your headband."
Boruto blinked at her before his irises grew unnaturally large. "I've never thought about it like that before." He jumped to his feet, punching his fist into the air, yelling, "I just have to think about myself like my ninja avatar, that's it! Thanks, Mom!"
Hinata's lips parted in confusion but she couldn't resist reciprocating Boruto's wide grin. Even though she couldn't fathom what exactly she had helped Boruto to realize, seeing him be so enthusiastic made her heart swell.
Shining blue eyes caught her gaze as their owner rushed out a question. "Do you happen to know if Sasuke-san has returned to the village yet?"
Hinata's smile twitched into a grimace. "Sa-Sasuke?"
"Yeah, do you remember him? He's tall, always wears dark clothing, and he's just so cool," Boruto exclaimed with an odd sparkle in his eyes while he was jumping up and down, trying to show how tall Sasuke was.
Hinata tilted her head to the right, amused by the adoration gleaming in her son's eyes toward her husband.
Shaking her head slightly, she reminded herself that Sasuke wasn't her husband in this world and Boruto wasn't her son. For some weird reason, Hinata kept forgetting these children weren't truly her children, and every time she was forced to recite that fact, a bolt of sadness jolted through her entire being.
"I remember him, but I think he isn't back yet."
"Oh, bummer," Boruto pouted, slouching his shoulders forward. "Anyway, I'm gonna ask Sarada tomorrow, just to be sure."
Hinata raised an eyebrow. "Sarada?"
"Yeah, his daughter."
Hinata's heart sank into her stomach. She had anticipated that Sasuke would have a different family in this reality, but until she had been kept in the dark about it, she could pretend it wasn't the case.
With trembling lips, she forced out the dreading question that circled her ever since she had arrived in this reality. "Who's her mother?"
Boruto eyed his mother suspiciously, astonishment scrunching his face up in a quizzical look. Folding his arms, he let the pregnant silence bellow louder than any noise before he answered, "Sakura-san."
Hinata received the news with a gentle smile stretching her face—she had expected it to be Sakura. A warm fire of jealously flared in the pit of her stomach, but she easily extinguished it with a deep breath as she reminded herself that this wasn't her world.
Inwardly, Hinata mused on how different everyone's lives turned out to be only because Naruto and Sakura kept on living.
"I'm home."
Hinata winced upon hearing the voice coming from the hallway, but a smile still flickered across her face as she followed her children of this reality to greet the man that had such a strong influence on her life—alternate and real as well.
Himawari jumped on Naruto, peppering his cheeks with small kisses and Hinata pushed her hand against her chest, etching the happy scene unfolding in front of her eyes into her brain forever.
As Naruto put Himawari down, Hinata spotted an old book tucked under his armpit. Excitement tingled in her stomach upon recognizing the calligraphic letters on the hard cover. Naruto walked up to her and handed over the book as discreetly as he could, the motion accompanied by a flat smile.
"Thank you," Hinata whispered, refraining from throwing her arms around Naruto's body to thank him with a tight hug. Before her limbs could act on their own, she swirled around and took a step forward toward the living room when a small hand tugging at her sleeve stopped her.
"Mama, didn't you forget something?" Himawari inquired with anticipation blazing in her cerulean blue eyes.
Hesitantly, Hinata peeked down at the young girl. "Um, did I, Hima?"
"Yes," Himawari bobbed her head up and down, a knowing expression taking over her face. "Papa arrived home and he even brought a gift for you. You should greet him with a kiss."
Hinata choked on her own saliva while Naruto quickly knelt down to bring his eyes to the same level as Himawari's, muttering something about a kiss not always being necessary. Himawari pouted and stomped her feet in disappointment.
"You don't love each other anymore?" she asked with fat teardrops rapidly forming in her large, puppy eyes.
Naruto clasped her tiny shoulders. "It's not about that, Hima."
"Then show it! You always say it's important to show our love to whom we care about."
The desperation disfiguring Himawari's innocent features reminded Hinata of Kosuke's agitated expression every time he stood in front of their house, waiting for his father's safe return. The sight shook her insides and without thinking, Hinata stepped next to Naruto and pushed a quick kiss on his cheek. Naruto snapped his head to the side to stare at her with his mouth agape.
A slight blush blooming on her cheeks, Hinata shifted her eyes at Himawari. The little girl pointed her finger at her own mouth and commanded, "To his mouth."
"Hima, it's okay, I'm pleased with what I got," Naruto turned back to his daughter, patting her head.
"What's the big deal? You two are married, aren't you?" Boruto chimed in, leaning against the wall while a smug smile adorned his face. "I'm not fond of seeing you two all lovey-dovey because it's embarrassing, but you're making an unnecessarily big fuss over a kiss. Which you always give to each other, by the way." He squinted his eyes at the pair as if he was silently accusing them again of hiding something.
Being trapped between the awaiting gazes of the two children, Hinata's posture became unsteady. If they refused, Himawari would most probably spend the whole night crying, and Boruto would become even more suspicious than he currently was.
Naruto looked up at her, still kneeling in front of his daughter, asking for permission with his eyes. Hinata tightened her grip around the book, pushing it against her chest as though it could give her safety. Slowly, her head moved into a curt nod.
Naruto stood up and took a step forward to bring their bodies closer. Warmth emanated from him and Hinata sucked in a shrill breath. Her lavender eyes locked with cerulean blue ones before they disappeared under closed eyelids as Naruto leaned forward, pushing his lips against Hinata's.
Hinata's eyes widened before her reflex prompted her to shut them closed. Even though the pleasant scent of orange blossoms whirled around her, she couldn't help but remember the taste of evergreen pinecones.
After a few seconds, Naruto pulled away and the sudden cold air brushing her plump lips left Hinata yearning for the radiant warmth of her own husband.
Himawari clapped her hands gleefully and grabbed Naruto's arm, dragging him into the living room area.
Tucking an unruly lock of hair behind her ear, Hinata glanced at Boruto who was still leaning against the wall. He kept his mouth curled up in a smirk, but instead of the gesture being mischievous, it looked all-knowing. Without a word, he pushed himself away from the wall and disappeared after his sister and father.
Taking advantage of being left alone, Hinata hurried up the stairs to hide the book Naruto had brought her in the bedroom. As a precaution, she slid it into the drawer of the nightstand.
When she returned to the Uzumaki family, Naruto and the kids were already sitting around the dining table, waiting for the dinner to be served. Himawari was babbling to her brother about how exciting it was to spend time in the Hokage Tower in the morning, but Boruto looked rather unimpressed. His eyes flickered at Hinata, making her gulp—the blue irises hid an abundance of thoughts and emotions that Hinata wouldn't be able to clearly see even with her Byakugan.
Sauntering to the kitchen, Hinata grabbed a bowl of food and put it on the middle of the dining table. She plopped down to the empty place next to Boruto and the small family started their dinner.
"So," Boruto was the first to speak after stuffing a big ball of rice into his mouth. "How come you're eating dinner with us again, Dad? Are you a shadow clone by any chance?"
"I'm not. You can hit me to check," Naruto stretched out an arm over the table with a grin, but when Boruto only snorted, he placed it back on the table. "I will be home more in the upcoming days. Even the Hokage can't work all the time, right?"
"Right!" Himawari cheered with joy twinkling in her eyes.
Boruto only nodded but Hinata didn't miss the twitching of the corner of his mouth as he tried hiding his smile.
As Hinata's eyes traveled from Boruto toward Naruto, she bit on her lower lip to avoid a gasp. Icy blue eyes bore into her and even though their owner grinned, the irises weren't showing any sign of happiness.
Those eyes were inspecting, analyzing, and warning her at the same time, making Hinata squirm in her seat.
After the uneventful dinner, both Boruto and Himawari disappeared into their own rooms. To fool herself into thinking everything was all right, Hinata prepared tea for Naruto. While she waited for the water to boil, her thoughts involuntarily returned to her own reality and the book upstairs in the drawer of the nightstand.
A blast, a scream, and eternal numbness bounced in her memories, twisting themselves into happy songs, tears of joy, and sunny warmth.
The contrast between the two seemingly different worlds in her head knocked Hinata off balance and she leaned against the kitchen counter, fixating her eyes on the steaming water filling the teacup.
Lilies, carnations, sapphire, and amber stone meshed into one eternal jumble of contrasting images making Hinata's stomach turn.
Chilly air grazed the skin on her legs and she twirled around, coming face to face with a wide-eyed Naruto.
"Hinata, are you alright? You're pale."
"Someone is watching me," she blurted out, her knuckles turning white as she was clutching onto the edge of the kitchen counter.
Naruto raked his gaze through their surroundings, his eyebrows knitting together. "Right now?"
"I think yes." Activating her Byakugan, Hinata looked around with a frantic motion of her head. "But… I can't see anyone."
Naruto stared down at her, his lips pressing together into a thin line as the popping out veins slowly smoothed back into Hinata's skin. "I was thinking about involving a Yamanaka."
"Do you think I'm lying?" Her question came out rushed, desperate, and hurt, her voice cracking at the end.
"I didn't say that," Naruto sighed and stepped next to Hinata, accompanying her in leaning against the kitchen counter. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and turned his head to stare into the perplexed lavender eyes. "Shikamaru believes a Yamanaka inspecting your mindscape could help us find clues about what happened to you exactly."
"But I told you what happened before I—"
"Hinata," Naruto cut her off firmly, but the name still rolled off his tongue gently. "We can't rule out any possibilities just yet."
Hardening her glare, Hinata articulated, "But you're ruling out the truth."
"As I said, we don't rule out any possibilities."
With anger bubbling up in her chest Hinata pushed herself away from the kitchen counter, but she forced her voice to remain calm and collected. "You said you would help me."
Lifting his arms in a defensive position, Naruto uttered, "I'm trying to help."
Pacing nervously around the small kitchen, Hinata mumbled to herself, "I need to get back as soon as possible. My family is waiting for me."
"Are you sure you know where exactly you need to get back to?"
Hinata's head snapped up as she stopped in her tracks. Without asking, she was aware of what Naruto was trying to refer to—the realization that Naruto didn't believe her all this time dawned on her at that very moment, slapping her with the sense of being left all alone in her struggle.
Staring into the worried but suspicious eyes, Hinata felt betrayed.
Defiantly, she pursed her lips and a deep frown passed through her face. "Please, let's involve a Yamanaka," she declared and without waiting for a response, she flounced out of the kitchen and stomped up the stairs.
Yanking the drawer of the nightstand open, Hinata brushed her fingers over the cover of the hidden book.
"I will get back to where I belong," she whispered to the golden calligraphy.
Sorry for the delayed update, life had been hectic lately! But I will try to get back on schedule from now on!
And I know a lot of you are waiting for Sasuke's arrival. It's close, I promise! I'm sorry for my slow pacing on that front.