Fandom: Avengers

Character(s): Iron Man/Tony S. | Harley K. | Spider-Man/Peter P. | Pepper P.

Pairing(s): Tony/Pepper

Warning(s): AU, references to Tony's playboy days, spoilers through Spider-Man: Homecoming

Twenty-four hours after his meeting with Harley's mother, Tony Stark found himself facing a rock-hard loaf of walnut date bread as he and Pepper shared the lumpy-and-yet-oddly-comfortable couch in May Parker's living room.

The lady of the house listened quietly to the entire pitch, then turned to Pepper with a sympathetic grimace and said "Finally took too many blows to the helmet, did he?", jerking her thumb in Tony's general direction.

Pepper smirked. "You know," She said, "Sometimes I wonder..."

(It struck Tony suddenly that introducing Pepper and May had been a terrible idea.)

"I'm right here, you know." He muttered, crossing both arms across his chest.

"So you are." There was something very patronizing in May's voice; the sort of tone that a parent uses when a toddler declares that they're not going to bed (or the way an organ grinder speaks to their trained monkey).

Tony scowled

And, thanks be to all angels above and below!, Pepper took pity on him. "I know this is probably quite a shock, May." She said, tearing open a sugar packet to add to her coffee. "But what Tony says is true."

"So let me see if I've got this right." Peter's aunt stirred some creamer into her own mug and offered a slice of walnut date bread to Pepper. (Pepper politely accepted it, ignoring Tony's frantic signals of No! with practiced ease.) "Your Board of Directors have lost their minds and so you've decided that you'll just adopt my nephew and some other boy and whisk them off to your big tower to inherit your big brass tech company?"

"Well, yes - essentially." Pepper glanced over at her fiancé. "Isn't that right, Tony?"

"Uh...right. I mean, yes." Under May's eagle-eyed gaze, Tony discovered, to his annoyance, that he was actually sweating. (He tried to unobtrusively wipe his palms on his jeans.) "I want to adopt Peter."

"Have you talked to him about this?"

"No."

May sighed. "Well, at least you're consulting with me first this time."

After the easier-than-expected conversation with Harley's mother, Tony had quaffed a celebratory finger or two of cognac before preparing himself for disappointment. May Parker was a proud woman. And she had already proven herself to be the equivalent of two mother tigresses defending their den when it came to anything concerning her nephew's welfare. (Tony still shuddered sometimes when he thought about how May had ripped into him after the whole Spider-Man secret had come out.) And, sure, she was cool with Peter continuing his internship and spending weekends at the Compound and she had sent Tony tickets to Peter's latest Decathlon event, but that didn't mean that she would agree to anything that would encroach on her territory as Peter's guardian and parent.

May took her job very seriously.

But she didn't put up much of a fight about this, just muttering something about it being "good for Peter to have some kind of father figure in his life" before launching into custody negotiations with Pepper.

Yes, it would be a dual guardianship.

No, May would not be signing over any of her rights.

Yes, Tony would assume full financial responsibility for Peter.

No, Peter wouldn't have to leave Midtown Tech or live at the Compound during the school week.

Yes, they would of course get Peter's take on this before making any kind of final decision.

Tony wanted Peter to be a part of this more than just about anything he had ever wanted in his entire life...but he also wanted Peter to want to be a part of it.

He sat silently and nursed his coffee while May and Pepper hashed out the particulars of the adoption, pinching himself at regular intervals just to make sure he wasn't dreaming. It all seemed too easy. And when was anything Tony Stark actually wanted ever easy?

Just before the bottom dropped out - that's when.

And, after all of this build-up, Tony didn't know if he could take it if this one fell apart.

"Are you absolutely sure?" He blurted out, interrupting both May and Pepper mid-thought. They turned to look at him, askance, and Tony blustered on ahead. "I mean, by all means, don't say 'yes' just because - "

"When have you ever known be to say yes 'just because'?" May demanded archly, but her eyes softened even as she spoke. "Sono molto testardo, lo sai.*"

"But are you sure you know what you're saying 'yes' to?"

"Frankly? No." May raised an eyebrow. "How about you? Do you know what you're getting into?"

Tony gaped slightly. "...excuse me?"

"You say you want Peter and this...Harley to help you out and that they'll get financial and job security out of it in return, right?" May took a sip of coffee and set her mug back down with a little clunk. "Fine. Great. That's good so far. But if you really want to go the whole way and adopt them, then you need to step up to the plate. They'll be your kids too, and you can't just hand them back when things get tough or they get into trouble."

"Underoos is a good kid."

With a snort, May burst out laughing. "Stark, all teenagers get into trouble from time to time...even the good ones. That's just part of being a parent: Dealing with it. Daily heart attacks and guilt-complexes included." Another snort. "My Peter's a good boy, but he's just a boy. And if that Harley is anything like him, there's going to be times when they both conspire to make all of our hairs gray. And if you're really going to play the part of their father going forward, Tony, you have to be more than just the fun parent. If we want to get them safely to adulthood and beyond, we will all have to work together. So, I ask, are you sure about this? Because once those papers are signed, there's no takebacks."

Tony cracked a weak smile. May had brought up some excellent points; things he had never even thought of when he was coming up with this whole scheme. He had enjoyed being the rich-sponsor-and-sometimes-co-brainstormer-from-a-distance with Harley and enjoyed his mentor-and-chat-about-everything-before-supper-and-a-movie sessions with Peter that he had already found himself slipping into a more parental role now and then...but May was right. This was going to be different.

And, if he was going to do it, he was going to do it Better.

Better than Howard Stark, at any rate.

He wanted the boys (his boys) to trust him and listen to him and lov...not resent him the way he had always resented his own father.

He wanted to be a dad.

Finding Pepper's hand on the couch beside him and giving it a squeeze, Tony cleared his throat. "Well, guess I better start hitting the parenting books, huh? Any suggestions?"

Pepper and Tony talked with May until 2:00, which was when May needed to leave for work. So they made their farewells, laden with two parenting books, a list of suggested websites, and the remaining half of the walnut date loaf.

(Tony had to stifle a groan.)

"So, we'll see you on Saturday, then?" Pepper said as May walked them to the apartment door. "Carolyn is planning on flying in Friday night."

"We'll be there." May smiled and shook Pepper's hand. "I'll tell Peter tonight after I get off of work. I'll text you what he thinks."

"Thank you." Pepper tucked the wrapped bread under her arm and glanced at Tony. "Thank you for everything, May."

May waved off the thanks. "It's just good to know that I have company in the asylum."

Pepper chuckled and turned to leave.

May stood back to let them past. Then, just as Tony was going to walk out of the door, she grabbed him by the lapel, dragging him forcibly back into the apartment, pulling him in close enough that he could see the whites of her eyes. "Congratulations." She said sharply and in a low voice. "It's a boy."

He blinked. "I know. Could you let - "

"I'm on board." May cut him off, shaking him slightly to drive her words home. "And I'll help you with anything you need as we all move forward. But just know, Mr. Tony 'Iron Man' Stark - if anything bad happens to my kid because of this, I'll skin you alive. Suit or no suit." She smiled with a sudden, savage sweetness. "Capiche?"

Tony swallowed hard, disturbed, and nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

TBC...

* "I'm very stubborn, you know." (According to Google Translate.)