Happy fall everybody! Hope everyone is having good weather. The weather where I live has been surprisingly good the last few weeks, and I don't even live in an area known for its warm climate.

Anyway, let's cut to the chase. Today's story is based on the episode "Zoohouse Rock", requested by Kinghammer Publishing and ironically enough, by AA immediately after I posted Chapter 96. I love it when that happens because it means I can satisfy recent reviewers while still following the sequencing I've planned out.

Honestly though, I feel like I didn't try hard enough on this one. It's mainly just a filler chapter, done for no other reason than to get all Grojband episodes finished. So, sorry about that. I can promise there will be more effort put into the next one (which I will discuss in more detail when I upload it). In the meantime, you can read this if you have some spare time.

Chapter 97

Animal House

Kin was sitting in a chair one afternoon. His hands and feet spread out, and his mind completely cleared of distraction, he was ready for his body to make impact.

"Hi Kin!" Jackie popped out from behind him, making the scientist jump. "Whatcha doing? Ooh, what's this fancy doohickey?"

"Oh! Hey, Jackie! What, you mean this old thing? Oh, it's just my mussage chair."

"A massage chair? Nice! I love getting massages!"

"Well, actually, this is a mussage chair." Kin corrected her.

Laney was behind Jackie. "So what's that mean?"

"It's basically a chair that massages and plays music at the same time. Neat, huh?"

"Can't you just listen to music with headphones while you're getting massaged?" Laney pointed out.

"Yeah, but with this chair, it's actually the music that massages you! Observe. Kon?"

Kon was plugging the mussage chair into his drums.

"All right, let's get the knots out of that deep tissue!"

He stomped on his drum pedal, sending Kin flying straight into the garage door.

"That doesn't look very relaxing." Jackie observed. "But it did leave a cute little Kin-shaped dent."

"Heh, heh…" Kin said from the floor. "She thinks my silhouette is cute."

At that moment, the garage door opened and Kin was met with what looked like a bear playing a guitar.

"Eek! Bear!" Kin shouted to Kon. "We've trained for this! Play dead!"

Kon fell to the floor with his eyes open and tongue hanging out. The bear laughed and removed its skin, revealing Corey's face underneath.

"Relax guys, it's just a costume!"

"Obviously," Jackie giggled, looking down at Kin. "Real bears can't play the guitar, Kin, you silly goose."

Kin got up. "Oh yeah! I knew that! I just wanted to make sure you knew…"

"Why are you dressed like a bear, Core?" Laney asked.

"Remember yesterday when we were talking about new outfits for the band?"

"Yeah, something about wearing hats that matched our socks?" Jackie recalled, snickering. "Boy, was that a dumb idea!"

"Oh yeah, right?" Kin chimed in. "It was really dumb! Incredibly dumb! Worst idea ever!"

"I thought it was your idea?" Kon whispered, prompting Kin to push him aside.

Corey continued. "Well, I figured, instead of doing that, we could dress up as bears like all those other big costumed bands? You know, like Porka Polka, the Four-Man Horse, or the Chicken Suit Experience?"

"Aren't all of those costume bands also lyric bands?" Laney reminded him.

"Shh…" Corey put a finger to her mouth.

"But Core-"

"Shh…why so negative, fella? Does someone need a bear hug?"

The blunette squeezed the redhead tightly. Being so incredibly close to her crush was enough to make Laney blush and giggle. Until she was dropped suddenly.

"Ow!"

"Aww…bear hugs!" Jackie squealed. "That's super adorable, Corey! Can I get one too?"

"Of course Jacks! You've got a right to bear arms!"

As the two embraced, Kin watched from afar and sighed.

"Man, Corey gets all the attention from girls." he told Kon. "Not to mention the hugs, the admiration, the goo-goo eyes…and what do I get? Nothing! I don't understand. What's his secret?"

"Hey! Maybe if you tried copying his schtick, you'd score some ladies too!" Kon suggested.

"You think so? You don't think it's better for me to be myself?"

"Dude. Honestly. How far has being yourself got you in your relationship with Jackie?"

"Good point."

Once Jackie was done hugging Corey, Kin approached her.

"Uh, hey Jackie? Heh, heh…you have a right to bear arms! Heh, heh, heh! Get it?"

He spread his arms out, expecting Jackie to hug him. But she just gave him a blank, awkward stare and walked away.

"Um…you know, because bears have arms or…something?"

Corey slapped the head of a bear costume onto Kin. "Next time dude, try it with this on."

WICKED COOL TRANSITION!

Once the other band members were dressed as bears, they proceeded with rehearsal as normal. Everything went well until suddenly, the speakers stopped working.

"Great song guys!" Jackie clapped. "Though the ending was a bit abrupt."

"That wasn't the ending, Jacks." Corey claimed. "What gives?"

The band leader followed the wires to a set of plugs in the middle of the garage floor.

"It looks like everything's plugged in…So why did-?"

"Oops! Looks like you missed one, Beanie Bear!"

Tracy (who else?) was holding the plug connecting the other plugs to the garage outlet.

"Hey! Why'd you do that?!" Jackie demanded.

"Sorry Grrrojband. You're noising so loud, Macy can't hear herself think when I tell her to think."

Out of nowhere, Macy began to measure Jackie and the others.

"What are you doing?"

"She's measuring how much less of you I'll need for my party tonight." Tracy explained.

"Well your party will have even more room when you have it somewhere else! This is our garage too!"

"Yeah, so you'll have to 'bear' with us!" Corey joked.

Tracy snarled as she and Macy left the garage.

"Those little runts can't tell me where I can't throw a party! And they also can't tell me where I can't throw them so I can save my party! Macy, we're gonna need a hole!"

"What kind of hole? A pit?"

"Too unoriginal."

"Chasm?"

"I can't even spell that."

"Canyon?"

"…A pit! That's totes the best idea! So glad I thought of it!"

"You're a genius, Tracy!"

But before they could even find a spot to dig, Mayor Swellow walked by talking to the picture of his mother.

"It's not my fault people aren't coming to Tranquil Zoo, mother! We need animals that are less boring and more performing! If we don't find a money-making animal act soon, our zoo will be bankrupt!" he started crying. "You're right, mother! I never should have used our funds to buy that one-of-a-kind, diamond-encrusted unicorn cage! Oh, but don't worry, we'll catch that magnificent beast yet!"

Upon hearing the "conversation," Tracy gained an evil smile.

"Macy? Phone me."

"Huh? Why do you need a phone, he's right over-"

"DO IT!"

Macy handed Tracy a hotline phone and she dialed the mayor's number. He immediately picked up.

"Swellow?"

"Hey, Mayor Swellow? I've got a whole garage full of smelly, music-playing bears. You could totally take them and put them on display at your lame zoo or whatever."

The politician zipped up to the two girls.

"Don't tell me how to save my zoo!" he beamed suddenly. "…But this could save my zoo."

After that decision was made, it wasn't long before Swellow had caged up Grojband and the garage stage along with them.

"Hey! What's going on?" Corey wailed.

Swellow attached the cage to a semi-truck and got in the driver's seat.

"Okay bears, sit tight! We'll have you in captivity in no time!"

With that, the truck drove the four fake bears away, with Jackie desperately trying to chase it down.

"Hey! Wait! Come back! Those aren't real bears, they're my band!" she turned to her sister who was giggling. "I'm guessing you had something to do with this, didn't you?"

"What? You should be thanking me. This works out for both of us. Think about it; they get to play their grody music in their very own performance space, and I get to have my totally awesome party in my garage! It's like, a win-win!"

The older teens went inside.

"Hmph. Knowing Tracy, a win for her always ends up being a lose for us! I better go bust the guys out!"

The manager jumped onto her bike and began to pedal toward Tranquil Zoo.

Meanwhile, at the zoo, Grojband had just been relocated into an even bigger cage.

"Okay bears," Mayor Swellow said from the outside. "Get this cage a-rocking so the customers will come a-knocking!"

"Mayor Swellow, you've got it all wrong." Corey explained. "We're not actually bears."

"Nice try! That lovely girl in the blue tank top already warned me how tricky you bears are! I bet ya'll actually got people costumes under your bear skins!"

"But that would mean…under our people skin, we're…BEARS!" Kon unzipped his skin. "Nope. Just meat and junk."

"Now I've seen a lot of noisy bears in my day, but none that play musical instruments." Mayor Swellow recalled. "So I'd get with the jamming if I were you, unless you'd rather get mounted on Mother's disappointment wall."

The band was horrified when Swellow showed them a picture of a wall of performing animal heads.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I've gotta give a troublemaking kangaroo a good talking to! Joey thinks he runs the place."

Once the mayor was gone, Jackie arrived on the scene.

"Guys! There you are! What the heck's going on?"

"Jacks! So glad you're here!" Corey began. "The mayor wants us to play music in these bear suits to entertain the zoo patrons!"

"And if we don't, we'll end up on the disappointment wall!" Laney added.

"Did you tell Mayor Swellow you weren't actually bears?"

"Yeah, but he didn't believe us." Kin informed Jackie.

"Well maybe if you take the costumes off, he will."

"Great idea, Jacks!" Corey began to remove his head but a snarling noise interrupted him.

Standing behind the band leader was a real bear, growling in suspicion. He put the head of his costume back on and the bear stopped. Then he lifted it off slightly and the bear growled. He put it back on and once again, the bear stopped.

"Great, if we take off our costumes, we're lunch!" Laney griped.

"Then I guess the only solution is to break you guys out." Jackie concluded. "Anyone know how we can do it?"

"Not to worry! I've got a crazy plan that just might work!" Kin stated proudly.

"Hey! You stole my catchphrase!" Corey accused.

"I know! Did I sound cool just now, Jackie? Like someone you would admire and give all your attention to? I did, didn't I?"

Jackie raised an eyebrow. "Uh…whatever you say, Kin."

STOLEN LINE TRANSITION!

After explaining his plan, Kin sent Jackie to a vending machine across from the bear cages. She inserted a couple of dollars and selected a bottle of fizzy soda and a pack of mints. Once she retrieved them from the machine, she brought them back over to Kin and he proceeded to shove the mints into the cage lock, shake up the soda and stuff it in with the mints.

"Jackie, I'd back up if I were you."

Jackie did so and so did the other band members as the soda bottle began to shake ferociously. All of them covered their ears, (even the bear) expecting a pretty loud explosion. A few seconds went by however, and they heard nothing. Kin got up and observed the lock, the last bit of soda dripping from the bottle.

"Nothing?! I don't get it. The last time I combined Chugger's Cola and Blasty-Mouth Candy…" he opened his mouth wide. "I lost three teeth!"

"We could have just gotten something from that vending machine"

Laney pointed to another machine across from the other one. This machine was filled with several useful (and dangerous) tools. One kid inserted a dollar and received a crowbar.

"Shoot. And I just used up the last of my allowance too." Jackie complained.

The kid stuck his tongue out at the band and walked away, licking the crowbar like a lollipop.

Meanwhile, back at home, Tracy had just finished setting up for her party. Or rather, Macy had just finished setting it up for her. The whole garage was decked out with pink ribbons, disco balls hung from the ceiling, and there was a table covered with pink-frosted cupcakes.

"Not bad, Mace! I was expecting another total let-down from you!"

"Thanks Tracy! Couldn't have done it without you critiquing me so harshly!"

Suddenly, the girls noticed the room become shinier. It wasn't from the sun they soon found out, but instead, Tracy's crush, hunky Rick Salary, who was standing by the door.

"Nice pad, Tracy Matthews."

"Oh, hi Rick! So glad you like it! It's for my mega awesome party tonight that you're totally invited and have full intent on coming to, right?"

"Sorry, no can do. Rick Salary's on his way to the zoo to deliver pen pal letters."

"Uh…why?"

"Rick loves animals. Even the ones who end up in prison." A bird landed on Rick's finger and he stuffed it in his jacket.

"Oh. Well…that's why I'm throwing…an animal costume party! Everyone's going to be dressed up as something you love!" Tracy leaned on Rick. "Especially me…"

"Rick considers all options."

Rick walked off, causing Tracy to fall to the floor.

"Macy! Last-minute costume splurge! NOW!"

"Oh! On it, Tracy!" Macy zoomed out of the garage.

While Jackie and Grojband tried to think of another way to escape, Mayor Swellow returned to their cage, carrying a bucket.

"Dinner time!" he rang a bell and poured out the bucket. "Mm-mm! Fish heads! You guys got here on a good day! Yesterday was fish butts. Bon appetit!"

Kon and the bear started tossing fish heads into each other's mouth. The former picked up what appeared to be a fish butt bonus and happily shared it with his cagemate. They both chewed on the ends until their lips touched and they blushed. Jackie turned green from watching.

"Stop playing with your food and start playing for your skins!" Mayor Swellow ordered. "Either the zoo gets packed or you get stuffed!"

When the mayor left, Jackie swallowed the throw-up in her mouth.

"I'll never look at sushi the same way again…"

"Well, it looks like we don't have a choice, Core." Laney said. "We're gonna have to play."

"That's right! Grojband never hides from a gig!" Corey strummed his guitar. "Zoo song!"

"But you don't have any lyrics for a zoo song." Jackie pointed out. "And Tracy's all the way back home. Where are we supposed to get them?"

"Yeah, where?" Kon asked with a mouthful of fish.

Corey scratched his chin as he observed his surroundings. An idea popped in his head when he spotted Rick Salary handing a letter to Joey the kangaroo across the way and giving the marsupial a friendly fistbump.

"With bait, of course." he zipped to the cage bars. "Rick! You gotta help us get outta here!"

Rick approached the cage. "Rick thinks all bears have to pay their debts to society."

"But we didn't do anything!"

"Hold it right there, bear. You were framed? Rick Salary would do anything to help innocent bears!"

Jackie chuckled. "Uh, Rick? I don't think you understand how zoos work. You see-"

Corey covered Jackie's mouth as Rick began sending out a message on Bleater. A message that would reach out to everyone, including Tracy's party guests.

Tracy, dressed as a pink unicorn, reentered the garage where the whole room was completely empty, save for Macy in a kangaroo costume.

"Ta-da! Behold the unicorn! Nature's most fabulous and most fashionably late-what the?!" Tracy was shocked by the sudden lack of partygoers. "Macy! Where are all of my adoring fans?"

"Rick Salary just bleated that he needed people to help him protest at the zoo and everyone left! But I stayed. Because you're the greatest-"

Macy's phone went off and Tracy swiped it.

"'Rick Salary is ready to get his protest on'?! That's it! Time to get my party back!"

WICKED COOL TRANSITION!

Once Rick's message was sent, it was only a matter of minutes before Tracy's party guests, all decked out in animal costumes showed up with protest signs.

"Free the grizzlies! Free the grizzlies!"

"Whoa, it's like a zoo inside of a zoo!" Jackie observed. "In any case, we're giving Mayor Swellow what he wants."

"Thanks for getting the word out, Rick." Corey acknowledged.

"Rick Salary can't ignore injustice. When innocent bears are locked up, Rick is locked up too. In spirit, that is."

"Well, we have an audience now." Laney noted. "Now all we need are some lyrics."

"Rick!" a voice yelled from the crowd.

Jackie noticed a girl in a unicorn costume being carried by the angry mob.

"Hm…sit tight, guys. I'll get those lyrics for you."

Jackie made a quick exit just as Tracy was dropped in front of Rick.

"Rick! How could you? You're stealing my animal costume party!"

"Rick's throwing a party of his own: an animal protest party. And there's room for one more." he handed Tracy an apple. "Here ya go, little fella."

Tracy happily ate the entire fruit and whinnied.

"There it is, Mr. Mayor! The elusive, pink unicorn is awaiting capture!"

"Huh?" Tracy turned to see Jackie and Mayor Swellow, the latter of which was holding a net.

"I told you it would happen, mother! We finally have the filling for our precious unicorn cage!"

The mayor lifted Tracy with the net, carried her over to the empty, diamond-encrusted cage and dumped her onto the cushioned throne inside. Despite receiving the royal treatment, Tracy wasn't too happy with her new accommodations.

"What? No!" she began calling out to her partygoers. "Hey, losers! This is my party! You're supposed to pay attention to me! I'm over here! So look at me already!"

"I gotta say, Jackie, you and those bear-clawed friends of yours really know how to draw in a crowd! Not only do Mother and I get to keep the zoo open, but we've got a brand new attraction in that unicorn ya helped me nab!"

Tracy was attempting to escape the cage by bucking her feet against the bars like a real horse.

"It was our pleasure, mayor." Jackie grinned while watching her sister. "Really, it was."

"BEHOLD ME!" Tracy screamed.

"I baked cupcakes!" Macy sang, carrying a tray while hopping.

The protestors helped themselves to the treats. Even Jackie and Grojband got to have some.

"Thanks for helping us out, Tracy!" Jackie shouted with her mouth full. "Sorry you're missing your party!"

Steam puffed out of the nostrils of Tracy's costume, which soon turned into fire as she screamed. Suddenly, she burst out of not only her costume, but her cage and flew into the air, surrounded by Macy's cupcakes. Her diary landed in her hand and she angrily wrote in it. A storm formed over the zoo and lightning struck. When Tracy finished writing, her pen burned out and she fell back down into the cage. Corey held out his hand to catch the diary, but Kin swiped it from him.

"Yes! I got it! What did you think of that, Jackie? I caught the diary just like Corey does all the time! Think any differently of me now?"

"Um…I guess so…not sure if that's a good thing though…"

Corey swiped the diary from Kin, giving him a look of annoyance.

"Time for a little jailbreak."

The band started to play.

Corey: I'm feeling all distraught

Held captive in this cage

All I wanted was a party

Now I'm filled with rage!

I'm stuck in Tranquil Zoo

Kin and Laney: Stuck in Tranquil Zoo

Corey: Where I don't belong

Kin, Kon, and Laney: He don't belong!

Corey: I don't belong!

If I could bust myself right out of here

I'd show them that they were all wrong

Kin, Kon, and Laney: So wrong!

As the song continued, the animals started to become more and more restless as they attempted to break out of their cages. The protestors emptied the tool vending machine and ran to help the creatures escape.

Corey: I tell you it ain't right

To lock a good man down

All I wanted was a party

Someone bust me out!

I'm stuck in Tranquil Zoo

Kin and Laney: Stuck in Tranquil Zoo

Corey: Where I don't belong

I don't belong!

Kin, Kon, and Laney: He don't belong!

Corey: If I could bust myself right out of here

I'd show them that they were all wrong

So wrong!

When the song was over, the protestors cheered as they had successfully freed all of the animals, Grojband included.

"Nice job, guys!" Jackie complimented. "The good news is you and all the animals got their freedom back! The bad news though is that some of those animals were locked up for a reason…"

One of the lions roared as all of the escaped beasts surrounded the humans in costumes.

"Uh-oh." went the kid with the crowbar.

"Uh-oh." went Rick and Macy.

"Uh-oh." went Grojband.

Later on, a news report went out about the incident.

"Wild animals were set loose from the Tranquil Town zoo by protestors in the name of animal freedom." Buster Newsworthy reported. "Hundreds were injured in the name of animal chasing and mauling."

Various pictures of the occurrence flashed onscreen, including the crowbar kid getting head-butted by a rhinoceros, Jackie and Grojband being chased by a land shark, Macy and Rick escaping on an ostrich, and finally, Tracy being held captive by Joey the kangaroo.

"Even a live unicorn was found," Destiny Providence continued. "Seen here with a rather large kangaroo."

"Yeesh!" Buster winced.

Jackie and the gang, now safe and sound back in the garage, were watching the report on TV.

"Huh. Maybe inciting a revolt to let all the animals out wasn't such a good idea." Corey noted.

Kon held a photo of the bear they shared a cage with.

"Gonna miss you little buddy." he sobbed. "We'll always have fish butts!"

"Well, I'm just glad we're out of those bear costumes." Laney commented.

"Me too." Jackie agreed, hugging Kin. "Animals are adorable and you guys were adorable as animals, but if you ask me, I think that's cause adorability comes naturally to Grojband. You really don't need a costume at all."

Kin turned red and giggled uncontrollably.

"You're right, Jacks. We don't need a costume." Corey gained a spotlight. "But don't we all put on a costume everyday? The layer we wear to hide our fears? Our sadness? Our pain? We just need to be let out! The cage is our skin and we just want freedom for what's within!"

The spotlight disappeared.

"Core, those would've made some killer lyrics!" Laney scolded.

Corey patted her cheek. "They may have, guy. Guess we'll never, ever, ever, ever know. Thanks for-"

"Thanks for coming out everyone!" Kin pushed Corey away and shut the garage. "How was that, Jackie? Sounding cooler and more lovable by the minute, aren't I?"

"Uh, maybe you should stick to your own schtick from now on, Kin."

13 chapters left!

So, next time will be the first part of the final original scenario, which is based on an idea of my own. As I said, I will go into more details about why it is going to be two parts when I post it because I don't really feel like going into it right now. Remember to review, even if the chapter is bad, and I'll see you all again soon!