Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy: The Vampire Slayer.
As they made their way to the kitchen, Buffy and Dawn were already making breakfast, when they noticed Willow and Faith approach.
"Good morning." Willow said.
"Morning." Buffy and Dawn said in unison as Willow passed by them and as soon as Willow was behind them, unable to see their faces, the Summers sisters looked at Faith worriedly and Faith nodded, confirming their fears.
At the kitchen counter, Willow was spreading the butter on the slices of bread and putting the roasted bacon on the plate with the omelet, while Faith was making the tea and poured it into the mugs before Willow and Faith sat at the table and as Willow sat down and relaxed, Buffy, Faith and Dawn looked at her worriedly.
"Everything alright, Will?" Buffy asked.
"I'm fine. Really." Willow said casually and they decided not to press the issue further as Willow started eating, while the girls observed the signs. Willow seemed to be paler than usual and the circles and dark shadows forming under her eyes and the fact that Willow was crying out Tara's name in her sleep made it clear she was far from fine but it would be unwise to force the talk immediately. When Willow was ready to open up to them, they would wait.
"Wanna go out shopping and get some ice cream?" Dawn suggested. It wouldn't exactly be the same without Tara but she was always happy to spend some time with Buffy and Willow and spending time with Faith, while not exactly what Dawn would have preferred, was also most of the time fun.
"Sure, Dawnie." Willow said, smiling and the girls smiled too, glad to see Willow cheered up at least a little.
Buffy and Dawn had already gotten dressed and were waiting at the door, while Willow was in the bathroom and was about to get out too, when she passed by Faith's bedroom and stopped herself, observing Faith, who was putting on her tank top and a jean jacket that had some rips and readjusting her hair, while Willow stared at Faith readjusting her looks, not helping herself, when Faith turned and noticed Willow at the doorsill.
"Everything OK, Willow?" Faith asked.
"Yeah. Sorry, I didn't mean to…" Willow trailed off.
"What? Stare at my punk looks?" Faith quipped, readjusting her sleeves, chuckling as Willow chuckled. "I see you're coyer than I remember."
"Maybe with you, Faith. Maybe with you." Willow said as Faith chuckled back.
"So, what do you think?" Buffy said, putting on a top and trademark pants.
"Not bad, B." Faith said.
"What about this hat?" Dawn said, putting on a hat and doing a pose as Buffy, Willow and Faith laughed.
"Cute. But let's see if it fits with…" Willow picked a leather jacket and handed it to Dawn, who put it on and did the same pose again as the girls did a thumbs-up.
"OK, what about you, Willow, have you picked some clothes already?" Buffy asked.
"I've got some dresses I want to try, just give me a few minutes." Willow said and they nodded.
Willow was in the changing room, trying on some dresses, when she picked a brown and green dress and stilled, since the colors were reminding her of the dresses that Willow and Tara wore and during that time, Sweet was in Sunnydale and it was also reminding her of the time, when she was getting more and more addicted to magic to the point that she wiped Tara's and her friends' memories too. While she had moved on and let go of Tara, the memory would never stop stinging her heart. It was unfair that she had lost her…
"You OK?"
Willow yelped, when she turned to face Faith. "You… what the…"
"Easy, easy." Faith assured, holding her shoulders. "You were in here for a bit too long and the cashier was about to kick you out. Is something wrong?"
"I…" Willow took a breath, looking down briefly as Faith noticed the flicker of pain and loss in her eyes.
"It's gonna be OK." Faith assured, placing her hand on Willow's shoulder. "Look, from what I know about her and from the impression I've got, Tara seemed like a nice girl. And I think she'd want you to be strong."
"It's just that this dress reminds me of Tara. We wore these dresses two years ago." Willow admitted and Faith sighed.
"Look. I don't wanna speak ill of her but she's gone. I know it's not easy but you have to let go of her and move on." Faith said as Willow sighed.
"I'm trying. But it's like everytime I do try, something pulls me back to her." Willow said.
"You don't have to forget about her. She'll always be in your heart and memories. You just need to accept that she's not with you every step of the way anymore, at least here. But she's still with you there." Faith said as she tapped Willow's forehead and chest as Willow smiled, assured.
"Since when are you so wise?" Willow asked.
"I had some therapy sessions with a counselor in jail. Wasn't much into the talking BS much at first but it helped, eventually." Faith admitted before she held Willow by her hand. "Come on."
Willow smiled, more assured as she left with Faith and they went to pay for the clothes.
Back in the house, Willow was trying on the clothes she had bought and smiling, remembering Tara as she put on a blue wool sweater and beige pants, which were similar to those Tara wore before she changed her appearance, putting on simple jeans and a T-shirt with flowers decorating the front and back, when she heard the window open and felt the breeze and turned in surprise to see the uninvited guest climbing in.
"Faith, what the—"
"Sorry for the unannounced entrance, but… you know, doors are overrated. B.'s still out on the patrol, Spike's with Dawn, training her, I guess they are going to spend the night at his place. They asked me to check in on you. See how you're doing. Figured you'd be asleep by now." Faith explained. Willow was about to open her mouth, when Faith raised her hand. "And don't try telling me 'I'm good' or something like this, I can see it in your eyes that you're still troubled. That's why I'm here."
Willow let out a smile despite the depression. "Thanks. I appreciate that you're worried."
Faith then noticed a small envelope on the drawer. "What is it?"
"It's a letter from Tara. She wrote it to once when she left me for a time." Willow explained.
"Did you read it?" Faith asked.
"Not since she…" Willow trailed off and Faith nodded.
"Do you want to…" Faith trailed off and Willow took a breath before she felt Faith's hand on her own. Gathering the strength, Willow picked the envelope and opened it, unfolding the paper inside it as she recognized Tara's handwriting before she felt her heart crush and her eyes get wet upon reading those words.
"I know it may be hard of me to leave right now, but I have to. I thought you'd be strong enough to understand how much has the magic been affecting you but apparently I overestimated your strength. I know you're a strong person and I believe that you'll pull through and I thought I could be there with you every step of the way but I see now that I'm holding you back. I just hope you'll find some sense before you hit rock bottom, which is the last thing I want to happen to you, but I see that I'm only standing in your way right now. When you're able to go on without the magic, I'll be there for you, either here or beyond.
Never forget that I love you and that I'm always in your heart, just as much as you will always be in my heart, my sweet Willow tree.
Love, Tara."
Faith was reading the letter over Willow's shoulder as Willow let out heavy breaths, as if a burden had been lifted off her shoulder.
"I'm sorry. I… I wish I'd known her under better circumstances." Faith said.
"Yeah. I think that under other circumstances, you and her could've been great friends." Willow said with a smile as Faith wiped the tears off Willow's cheeks. "It's… I said my goodbyes to her at her grave already. So why does it still hurt?"
"It's only natural to miss her, even if you let her go. Those memories keep her alive in your heart. But you can't let them hold you back. Even she's not part of your life anymore in one way, she still is in another way, you just need to find the right balance." Faith said.
Willow smiled, more assured now as Faith pulled her in for a hug, stroking her hair at the back of her head. "Thanks. I… I needed that."
"Look, Tara's never really gone. Just try to look past the ghosts." Faith advised as Willow laid down on the bed and for some reason, Faith could tell that her presence was comforting her.
She then took off her jacket and top before taking off her shoes, socks and jeans as well, now only in her lingerie as Willow shifted uncomfortably and blushed before Faith laughed in amusement at Willow's embarrassed reaction. She was not going to take advantage of Willow like that. "Chill, I'm just getting comfortable, that's all. Besides, as if I was gonna pursue you like that."
"Oh. Right." Willow said. She knew that Faith could be a sexually provocative person but at least she had the sense of decency to at least leave her black-laced lingerie on in Willow's presence.
"You got a sleeping bag or something?" Faith asked.
"You can sleep in my bed. There's enough space. And I don't mean that like… I mean, make yourself at home." Willow stuttered awkwardly as Faith chuckled and laid down next to Willow, pulling the sheet before Willow felt the heat of Faith's bare skin and found some comfort in it.
Faith turned to Willow, who seemed to be more serene and smiled in content, while Willow smiled at Faith appreciatively for trying to be there for her.
"Goodnight, Red." Faith said.
"Goodnight, Faith." Willow said as both girls closed their eyes.
I'm trying to improve myself on writing romance and I'm trying not to rush the buildup with Willow and Faith, even though the story is going to be short and I hope I did good with their scenes here.
The part with Tara's letter is inspired by 'A Helping Whitelighter' from btvscharmedgirl.
So, what do you guys think?
Please review and let me know if you have been enjoying this and want for me to continue.