Loosely inspired by Aragorn II Elessar's fic 'Worse dream ever!'
As the summary said, this is not for people who actually liked the Smallville cameo in Crisis, so if you're one of them, click back now. Staying and leaving a comment on how you liked it and disagree with this only makes you look like an ass.
"Can we go back to the part where you died?" Chloe asked in surprise as Clark told her what happened with Zod.
"It was more of a near death experience. I had this weird hallucination," Clark muttered.
"What makes you think you were hallucinating?" Chloe inquired.
"Well, for one thing, in this hallucination I gave up my powers again, willingly this time," Clark said.
"Well, you've given up your powers before," Chloe pointed out.
"This time, Lois and I quit our jobs at the Daily Planet to go live back at the farm," Clark said pointedly.
It took all of one second for Chloe to burst into laughter at the thought of Lois Lane of all people leaving a successful career behind to play house wife. Even Clark had a short laugh at the ridiculousness of it.
"Yeah, I think you were definitely hallucinating," Chloe said between laughs.
"And it gets weirder. Lex was there, but not our Lex. He looked different, he had a beard, and he acted more like a Saturday morning cartoon villain than Lex ever did," Clark said, cracking up at the thought. "He acted like he was smarter than everyone else, but he said something about how Clark Kent could never be Superman, which I guess is the Blur, in his universe despite the fact that in every other universe they're one in the same."
At this, Chloe laughed even harder. Clark was right, that Lex did sound like a cartoon villain more than the psychotic power hunger monster their Lex ever.
"I really wish our Lex could meet that one. I would pay just to see his reaction," Chloe said, leaning against the computer to support herself she was laughing so hard.
"And that's not even the weirdest part. These three people showed up, saying something about how the multiverse was going to end, whatever that means. They came to me for my help and I couldn't have cared less," Clark said as he and Chloe stopped laughing, both of them finding that part a lot less funny.
"Well, hallucinations never really make sense to begin with," Chloe pointed out and Clark nodded.
"Yeah, although actually Superman sounds a lot better than the Blur," Clark mused before shaking his head. "Anyway, Jor-El told me a greater evil is coming. He sent me back to fight it."
The Smallville cameo in Crisis being a hallucination Clark has while dying in the season ten opener would actually make a whole lot of sense. Not only is it ridiculous and inconsistent with the series and the characters of Clark and Lois, but Clark would have been thinking about his relationship with Lois around that time, so him hallucinating a happily ever after like scenario makes perfect sense.
And hallucinations don't make much sense in general, explaining all the inconsistencies.