AN- I make the mistake of reading DC's OTP fic again, and I thought I'd share what I got from a prompt a while back. It was something I'd considered as a possible start for 'Changing Course'.

Chuck vs the Cougars, before dinner with Ratner.

Sarah was exhausted, depressed, and angry when she answered the door. She tried to keep her voice calm, but the annoyance came through loud and clear when she saw the cause of much of her emotional turmoil.

"You're early." she said curtly, turning away from the door and walking over to her dresser.

"Technically I'm right on time for my pre-mission debriefing" Chuck said, brightly

Sarah wanted to punch him. And kiss it to make it better. Which wasn't helping her mood. She snapped at him, "What are you talking about?" She looked up at his reflection in the mirror as he sat down on the edge of her bed.

He shrugged and replied, "Standard spy school, you know. I need some stats for my cover tonight."

Sarah stopped putting on her heels and put a hand over her eyes, the stress and fatigue were teaming up to give her a headache. Which wasn't helping her anger. "Chuck, I'm really not… "

"No need to apologize if you didn't have time for the full dossier preparation." he interrupted then paused looking at her. "I think we'll just go over a few facts together if that's okay." He continued, "Fantastic. I'll go first. Uh, tonight, I'll be playing the role of Jenny's boyfriend Chuck. He works at the Buy More, not living up to his potential. Sister is Ellie, doctor, engaged to a doctor. There, all up to speed on Jenny's boyfriend." Pausing expectantly, he said, "Your turn."

Through his entire monologue Sarah struggled to keep a hold on her professionalism. This wasn't out of character for Chuck, he always wanted to know more. He prodded, he talked, he made people feel things. It was his misfortune that this time, all she wanted was to get through this and get back here to take some aspirin and get some sleep. Because you can't do what you really want. Tell him how you feel. Show him… show him how much you need him, that this isn't a cover anymore... That was the real reason she was so tired. Tired of fighting, tired of being hurt by the man I… love – all because I didn't… don't know what I can do about it. Anger, anger she could do. It was familiar for her. She took a long breath and ground out. "I'm not doing this."

Undaunted and apparently unaware of the thin ice he was traversing, Chuck continued on. "Here's what we know thus far." He paused for a dramatic moment. "Jenny Burton went to James Buchanan High School in San Diego, California, Class of 1998… Is it safe to assume that 'Jenny' is a diminutive of 'Jennifer'?"

Did he not know how he'd broken her heart just days before? How little she was in the mood for this kind of bantering? He'd told her how he felt and then that she couldn't have it? How he'd hit every single one of her insecurities in one shot? She felt like strangling him, crying, and jumping him to show him how wrong he was… all at the same time. She tried, one last time, to hang onto some semblance of a professional attitude. And to warn him. She ground out. "You have as much information as is pertinent to this assignment."

"Spell 'Jenny' with an 'I' or would…"

Exasperated with Chuck, the cover, the lies, the bits of truth... She broke. Professionalism went out the window along with the last shreds of her restraint. She grabbed his pencil and threw it at their picture on her dresser. It happened to impale his picture's face through the glass. I'll feel bad about that later, a small part of her thought as the rest of her moved. She grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and hauled him to his feet. She wasn't sure what precisely she'd originally been intending to do with him, but when she got him up he was inches from her face. She saw the curls she wanted to play with, and the lips she could still feel on hers after their few 'real' kisses. Fuck it. She kissed him to shut up, to just stop prodding her and leave her be.

Of course, for so many more reasons too. Her hands moved on their own, releasing his lapels and finding new destinations. One hand tangled in his hair to pull him to her, the other cupping his cheek. The kiss when she'd thought they were going to die was a light peck on the cheek compared to how this felt. She felt his arms go around her, one hand to her neck, the other to the small of her back. The kiss deepened and she began to worry, peripherally, if they were going to run out of air at some point. All things end and so did the kiss, but she knew she'd broken any hope of maintaining any distance from Chuck from here on out. Breathing hard she pulled her lips away, but didn't let him go. She put her forehead on his and said in a low tone. "Shut up. All you need to know is that Jenny… I… " She trailed off, fighting back tears. She was so tired. Maybe just this once she could 'fail' a mission… and win back her life.

"All you need to know is that I love you, Chuck." Sarah said finally, feeling as though a weight was lifted. Her headache faded almost immediately. "I love you and I'm so tired of fighting. Tired of covers and rules." Pulling away, reluctantly, she wrapped her arms around herself and looked away from him. "Tired of you breaking my heart."

"Sarah, I…" Chuck said slowly.

Sarah turned back, quickly, interrupting him. "I distinctly remember saying 'Shut up'. You talk. All the time. You think, somehow, you're the only person who wants normal? Who has feelings they're can't to act on? Did you ever consider it might be twice as hard for me, Chuck? Loving you, knowing how you feel, and having you do what you did to me? Having to still show up every day for this damn cover after that, and having you poke and prod every sore spot I have about my past - my worst insecurities? Being treated like I am by the agency, having Bryce show up and expect to slip back into my life like he fucking owned me? Did you even consider how I felt the night of that stupid party? I wore that fucking dress for you, you idiot!" Chuck looked stunned and opened his mouth then closed it. He seemed almost to be vibrating with the need to say something and Sarah remembered her angry command to 'Shut up.' She gave him another ten count, staring at him, then she let her face soften. "Well?" she said finally, quietly.

"You love me?" Chuck blurted out in a slightly high pitched voice before visibly shaking himself and trying again. "Sorry. I'm so sorry, I didn't know. Of course you were, are, having a hard time too and I didn't help and…" he paused again, and she saw him mouth the words 'what are you doing chuck?' silently. He stepped forwards quickly and hugged her tightly. "God, I've loved you practically since the day we met. I was, and am, an idiot for saying what I did. Please, forgive me, even if we can't have normal… I still want us. I just never thought I, we, could have it."

"Yes, I love you. I'm not sure I could live without you by this point." Sarah said, resting her head against his chest. "The rest we can figure out after dinner."