Chapter 11: To Dream Too Big

Haven Winchester

Schuyler, Nebraska, USA

September of 1987

"Haven? Can you stay with me after class?" The teacher- a small, blonde lady with a few grey hairs and a smile she wore all the time- asked as the bell rang. Haven sighed. She wanted to meet up with Dean and Sammy, so they could walk back to their room, not get in trouble for no reason she could think of. Teacher's rules were stupid, like the Dursleys rules. She didn't try too hard to figure them out.

"Ooooooh, you're in trouble," a few of the other kids nearby said, giggling, as they left the classroom. Haven glared at them before picking up her backpack and walking up to the teacher's desk. She dragged her feet a bit, but when she glanced up, she saw the teacher- Mrs. Wilson, her name was, Haven thought- was smiling. Why was she smiling if Haven was in trouble?

"It's alright, Haven. I just wanted to ask you a few questions," Mrs. Wilson said, waving for Haven to sit in the seat beside her desk. That seat usually meant you were in trouble. You had to sit in it while the other kids hid laughter and stared. You were supposed to think about what you did, but Haven didn't think she did anything wrong most of the time so she didn't do that.

Mrs. Wilson put a piece of paper on the desk and slid it to Haven. It was the picture Haven had drawn in class. It was supposed to be a picture of her and her family, but she hadn't been sure what to draw. She didn't really have family like the other kids. In the end, she'd decided to draw herself with Sammy, and then Dean when she'd realized she still had time and hadn't wanted to be bored.

"Did you run out of time to draw your parents?" Mrs. Wilson asked. She was still smiling. Haven didn't know why, but Mrs. Wilson was one of those teachers that smiled a lot and baby-talked them.

Haven shook her head. "I don't have parents. They're dead."

"Oh, but what about your guardians?"

"What are those?" Haven asked.

"The people who take care of you," Mrs. Wilson said.

"I don't got those either. I don't need anyone to take care of me," Haven said, kicking the legs of the chair. She hoped it would be over soon. She didn't get the point. Haven just wanted to go back with Dean and Sammy so they could play and watch t.v. and eat dinner. They'd be waiting, and Dean would get upset if she took too long.

Haven was surprised to see the smile was gone. Was Mrs. Wilson angry? What had Haven done wrong this time?

"You don't live with any adults?" Mrs. Wilson asked. She wasn't baby-talking in the same happy voice anymore.

"I live with people I guess. But John isn't family," Haven replied. At least, she didn't think so. She didn't mind it that way. That would be asking for too much. She was lucky to have what she did now.

"What about these two that you did draw?" Mrs. Wilson pointed to Dean and Sammy. Sammy was smiling. Haven had tried to draw his stuffed dog, but didn't do a good job. Dean stood beside them and held their hands, like he did when they walked home.

Haven said, "That's Dean and Sammy. I guess I live with them, too."

"They're your brothers then?" The smile came back a little.

Haven shook her head. "Nah. Sammy's my Sammy. Dean's his brother, though. Sammy's nice, so I didn't think he'd mind if I said he was family. If Sammy's happy, Dean won't mind, so they were the only two I could draw. Dean's kind of nice, too, anyway."

Mrs. Wilson frowned again. "Do they go to school here?"

"Yeah. They're probably waiting for me, Mrs. Wilson, so can I go?" Haven asked, tired of the stupid questions.

"I won't be too much longer, Haven, I'm sorry. I'm sure they'll understand," Mrs. Wilson replied. Haven groaned and kicked the chair leg again.

Mrs. Wilson's tone was a warning when she said, "Ms. Winchester."

Haven sighed again and went still, staring at the teacher. They only did that when she was about to be in trouble. She didn't want to be here any longer.

"How did you get that bruise on your arm, Haven?" Mrs. Wilson asked. Haven frowned and looked at her arms. Oh right. She'd gotten a pretty bad bruise when they were training with John last Sunday. He wanted them to get stronger and learn self-defense. At least enough so they could run, not that Haven thought she would run. Running wasn't brave or strong. Haven had fallen pretty hard on her arm and twisted it a bit. It still hurt some, but she'd had worse with the Dursleys. At least this was from training, not punishment.

She wished she could be training with John and Dean instead. John made more sense than teachers sometimes, and he taught things she wanted to know. He had said she had to go to school, though, 'cause they would teach her how to research, which she would need to know to be a hunter when she grew up. Haven never heard much about evil creatures and how to fight them at school, but he said research was going to happen later. They had to work their way there first.

"I fell. It's not that bad." Haven lifted her arm to show off. "See? It only hurts a little. I've had worse. Can I go now?"

"When have you had worse? Did you break your arm before?" Mrs. Wilson asked, ignoring Haven's question.

"Yeah. I've just gotten in trouble before. Why do you care anyway? School's over," Haven replied. Teachers didn't care about things like this really. If you lost a tooth in class or something, sure, but she'd never had one ask her all these questions. And Mrs. Wilson was looking at her weird.

"Haven… I'm going to ask you something, and I need you to answer me very honestly. Then you can go, okay? It's important," Mrs. Wilson said in a very serious voice. Haven nodded, glad to be done with it.

"Has your guardian- John, I mean- ever hurt you or hit you? It's okay to tell the truth. You won't get in trouble for it," Mrs. Wilson said.

Haven frowned. Why would she ask that? Besides it being none of her business, teachers didn't care about things like that she didn't think. They cared about class and homework. And Mrs. Wilson was sounding weird, too.

She got up out of the seat and picked up her backpack again. "Don't be stupid, Mrs. Wilson. John doesn't have stupid rules. I only get hurt if I'm dumb, so it's not so bad. Why're you asking about him anyway? It's not your business. Are you trying to get him in trouble? 'Cause John is fine, and Sammy and Dean would cry if he got in trouble. I don't like it when Sammy cries, Mrs. Wilson."

Haven marched out, not waiting for Mrs. Wilson to think of more questions.

Haven didn't think about it any more. At least not until a few days later, when she met up with Dean and Sammy to see Dean looking… angry. She walked slower and didn't quite walk all the way up to him.

He saw her and stepped closer, hissing, "Did you say something to someone? About dad? 'Cause they were trying to give me and Sammy the abuse talk. Do you know how much trouble dad could get in?!"

"I told Mrs. Wilson it wasn't her business and that it was fine, though!" Haven protested. "Why does everyone here care so much anyway?"

"'Cause they wanna take us all away from dad! Why didn't you tell me a teacher was asking about it? We gotta warn dad!" Dean replied. Sammy clung to his hand, looking like he might cry. If he cried, Haven was gonna go find Mrs. Wilson and pull all her pretty hair out.

"I didn't think it was a big deal. How was I supposed to know why she kept asking me weird questions? Just 'cause I drew no adults in the picture?"

"Well, it is a big deal!" Dean shouted, before he went quiet and sighed. "Let's just get back… I'll tell dad. He'll know what to do…"

Haven hesitated before following them. "Will they actually take us all away…?"

If they took her away from John, who would they put her with? Back with the Dursleys? Where would Dean and Sammy go? Would she stay with them?

Dean didn't answer her, just grabbed onto both of their hands as they walked. His grip was really tight. It only made her more worried. She didn't want to leave them. Dean had told her on her birthday she was staying forever. How could she ruin it so fast? She bit her lip. She didn't mean to. It was all Mrs. Wilson's fault. Sticking her nose where it didn't belong.

They walked quietly all the way back. Even Sammy knew better than to try and talk.

As soon as they made it, they saw John getting ready to head out. He usually left soon after they got back. Though since Sammy had started school, he sometimes wasn't there when they got back to where they were staying. Maybe because he didn't have to look after Sammy when they were out at school.

"Dad…" Dean began as they set their backpacks down, "Teachers at school have been asking us questions. Like, home questions. If you hit us and stuff. I told 'em you didn't, but I'm not sure they believe us."

Haven was surprised he didn't mention it being her fault that she didn't convince Mrs. Wilson.

John sighed heavily. He looked a bit scared though, she thought. He was quiet for a few moments.

"... Pack your things," John ordered.

"But what about-"

"Don't worry about it, Dean. Do what I said."

They got to packing again. Haven was getting good at it, since they did it so much. They hadn't even been here that long.

But it was better than seeing that mean Mrs. Wilson who was gonna ruin everything.

They didn't talk in the car, either. John's hands were white on the steering wheel as they drove that night. Dean kept glaring at her. He'd whispered to her before they left that he'd tell her how to deal with that better later so she didn't get all of them taken away.

Dean had said she was gonna stay forever. If he told John though, she might not be able to anymore. Or if another dumb teacher didn't listen and really did take them all away. Dean would never ever forgive her, and Sammy would cry and cry. She didn't want to see that happen ever. It was bad enough if she got sent back to the Dursleys, but she didn't wanna take Dean and Sammy away from John. He was actually nice to them. He was gone a lot, but he kept them fed and gave them hugs and stuff. They got birthdays and Christmases and clothes that fit okay.

She didn't realize she was sniffling until she felt Sammy's little arms go around her as he burrowed into her side. Sammy tugged her by the hair to lean down, so she did.

"Don't cry. It's okay, big sister," he whispered in her ear. "Dean yelled at me, too. He won't be mad for long."

She wasn't really listening to most of what he said, stuck on hearing 'big sister'. He thought she was his sister? She wasn't related or anything. Yeah she got adopted, but…

Still, she felt very warm and less like crying. Sammy was her favorite ever, and if she got to be his sister she thought that was the best thing to be.

Haven nodded and wiped her face. "I'm okay… brother."

She said the last word very, very quietly. The smile on Sammy's face told her it was the right thing to say.