Messed Up

Summary: When a wild night out takes away the lives of her three closest friends, Kagome wakes to find that nothing is how it used to be. 'Sango, Miroku, Inuyasha...is this my fault? I dragged you guys out. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!' It was only a matter of time before her mother decides to send her to Hasetsu to live with her Aunt. Whatever would come of this, it was in the Kami's hands now. "Kagome, you can't stop living; you owe it to your friends to keep moving forward!"

Anime/Manga: InuYasha/Yuri on Ice

Pairing: Kagome/Yuri-o

Genre: Romance/Hurt/Comfort

Rated: M for Mature Content

-x-x-x-

"Add it,"

"It's too late to add it, Yuri."

"Is never too late. If you think it'll improve it, then add it, but if you think it'll hinder your program, then leave it out." Applying a bit of pressure with his thumbs, running them from the base of her neck to the base of her skull, he repeated the motion a few times. Kagome was watching a skater around her age as she skirted across the ice. She wasn't a competitor or anything, not that Kagome was aware of. The TV crew that was there was there for her alone. As a pre-competition exhibition show of her short program. "Breath, you need to focus on yourself, not anyone else." Kneading the base of her neck before lightening the pressure and brushing along her shoulders. "You'll do fine if you focus on yourself and relax." Dropping his hands to his side, he stepped around her and moved into her line of sight. "The Kerrigan Spiral, you have an open for it just before your triple axel-triple toe loop."

"I-" Kagome stopped before she could argue with her youngest coach. Looking at Yuri, she felt an overwhelming sense of confidence flowing from him and felt her nerves quake. For a moment, she thought she'd suffocate. "..."

"Breathe." Yuri muttered, "you'll make me nervous like this." Taking a breath of his own, he closed his eyes and placed both hands on her shoulders. When he opened his eyes, he was met with hers. "Bez usiliy dazhe rybku iz pruda ne vytashchish."

"...what does that mean...?"

"Means, you can't even get a fish out of a pond without effort."

"Clearing the ice for the up-and-coming figure skater, fifteen-year-old Higurashi, Kagome. Her coaches have already made names for themselves, Yuri Pilsetsky and Victor Nikiforov. It's amazing how a young skater with no previous background in competition has managed to garner the attention of these two gold medalists, but here she is! Kagome will be skating in the Chu-Shikoku-Kyushu Regionals this year, her scores in the coming competitions will be marked and monitored carefully as a student of two Gold Medalists. With so many eyes watching her, and so much riding on these future events, there is no room for mistakes."

Kagome could have screamed. What was with this announcer? It was just a showcase, right?! "Don't think about it, Kagome."

Yuri laughed, "fuck him, he is just an announcer. You are a skater, and the ice is waiting for you. So go…skate."

Taking one more deep breath before exhaling. Kagome unzipped the windbreaker she'd been wearing and handed it over to Yuri who took it without question.

-x-x-x-

Yuuri was watching from next to his family and Victor as Kagome skated out onto the ice. Glancing away from Kagome as she did a couple of laps around the ice, his eyes took in a lone figure leaning against the wall in the back of the rink. Sesshoumaru. He knew who he was now. Having got the whole picture not long after he'd spoken with Kagome alone. He was here to support his brother's childhood friend, and in that, watch her soar. He'd waited for Kagome to come back to the hot springs after Sesshoumaru had returned and requested a room to stay in. When she didn't...well, he had wanted to go look for her, but Yurio had also been missing. He knew that she must have been out with him.

Training. Skating. Dancing. Stretching. She was working so hard to make her coaches proud, her friends proud. It was motivational to watch, and yet, he was desperately hoping that in all of her desperation to prove herself to everyone else, she didn't forget herself.

"Are you worried, Yuuri?"

Glancing away from the quiet man further in the back, Yuuri turned his gaze up into the cool icy blue eyes of his boyfriend. Well, fiancé really. Smiling, he looked back at Kagome as she settled into place in the center of the rink. Dressed in a white to cobalt blue ombre dress that fluttered innocently with the smallest of movement, long sleeves dipped to the middle finger with small crystals fading from top to bottom. It was simple and elegant, and Kagome wore it well. Hair done up in a tight twist with a few ringlets freely framing her face and her bangs puffed out disobediently as she had failed to tame them the night before. "No, I'm not worried."

Kagome pushed off in a graceful twizzler as the music started. Rotating on the ice, she skated backward to the languid notes that were spun gently by the pianist throughout the rink. It was a simple tune until the cello began strumming out what could only be described as a sorrowful melody. In some ways, it had an almost breathtakingly painful romance to it, but in another, it spoke of a memory lingering in the shadows of her mind. Yuuri could see the shadow in her eyes.

She wasn't skating to just any song. She was skating to a memory. Arabesque, he watched her raise her leg in a perfect line, her arm outstretched before her as she spiraled. "Was that part of her program?" He took the notebook from Victor who was watching her thoughtfully. "It wasn't, was it." Answering his own question, he looked back up in time to see her wind up for her triple axel and triple toe loop combo. Landing the triple axel perfectly then going straight into the triple toe loop, he smiled as she slipped into her steps.

She was skating flawlessly. He wasn't surprised. From what he understood, this program was the closest to her heart right now. Victor had explained it well enough. If the program that she and Yurio had come up with was a memoir of her time with her friends, the program that she and Victor had been working on was the transcendence of her soul. The trip she was taking to rise above the hurt, and conquer it. To show the world that she would strive, fight and survive. It was a theme of overcoming loss and rising above hardships. One that many could connect with.

"She's doing well. Yurio was right to fight for her."

Right, Yurio was fighting for her. He had put so much faith in her, it had taken him by surprise. In fact, Yuuri wondered if it had taken Yurio by surprise as well. Had he been prepared to put all of his faith in Kagome's rise in the Women's Figure Skating World? She wasn't competing yet, but she was still making a name for herself. It helped that her coaches were already gold medalists. The paparazzi that followed those two also snapped shots of them working with Kagome. In a matter of a few weeks, Kagome had been making the press go wild with anticipation.

The music came to a slow end, and with the last heavy keys of the piano, she stilled and the crowd was quiet. It didn't last long. Cheers loudly sounded in the ice rink, and he felt them reverberate throughout the large room. He was looking forward to Chu-Shikoku-Kyushu. He'd be able to see her perform in a new light, but right now… watching her heave a desperate breath of air. He could swear a weight had lifted from her shoulders. Her head fell back, her eyes closed, in that position, she looked like an angel being reborn anew.

"We have much work ahead of us."

"What?" Yuuri frowned, "that was flawless."

"It was, and now, she needs to dedicate herself to rise above her memoirs. Let's see how far we can push her before she snaps."

'Snaps?' Shaking his head, he recalled how he'd crumbled last year…and knew that for Kagome, it may be worse. "Don't let her break, Victor."

"Don't worry, my little piglet, I won't let her break."

-x-x-x-

02:00 AM as early as it was, Kagome was outside in her pajamas. Sitting on a stone structure that was out by the hot springs, she stared up longingly at the starry night sky. It was glittering, and in the silence, she could still vaguely make out the cheers of the crowd from earlier. Tears pricked painfully at the corner of her eyes, not wanting to cry any longer, she quickly wiped them away. "I don't want to hurt anymore." Saying it out loud felt horrible, but it was the truth. She wanted to smile and not feel guilty. She wanted to laugh, and not cry. She wanted to skate, and not hurt.

Every day was its own challenge, but today, she skated with the memories of her friends, before a crowd of strangers. She saw no one in the faceless crowd, but her friends who were by her side the entire time.

"It'd be amazing if you qualified, tell me you'll do it!"

"Can you guys see me? I'm skating, and I'll skate straight to Chu-Shikoku-Kyushu, then Nationals…and then…well…I guess you'll have to keep your eyes on me and find out. Won't you?" Smiling, she felt a brush of cold, icy wind, whisper in her ear. She heard nothing but a silent hush, and yet, she felt for the first time, a sense of clarity. A tremor of chills ran along her skin, and she nearly jumped when a jacket fell over her shoulder.

"It's too cold out to be in just your pj's."

Blushing, she looked back to see Yuri in a sweater and pajama bottoms, the black cheetah print jacket he normally wore lay over her shoulders and she slipped her arms into the sleeves. Flustered at being caught by surprise, she sighed and glanced back up at the sky.

"Give one hundred and ten percent, Kagome."

"I know," smiling, "I will," Kagome relaxed in the warmth and safety of the jacket she now wore.

"I'm going back inside, don't stay out too much longer."

"Ah! Y-your jacket!"

"...keep it."

She watched him leave and pulled the jacket tighter around her. "I wish you guys were here to tell me...what to do...about that." Bringing a hand to her cheek, despite the cool touch of her fingers, she felt the heat from her cheek still. "I don't know why...but despite the rocky start, I kind of like him...weird right? When Miroku told me and Inu that he had a thing for you, well...we kind of already knew, Sango. I wonder if you did too. Were you just waiting for him to say something?" Laughing, she shook her head, "I wouldn't put it past you. Intuitive, you knew things before most of us did, so why wouldn't you know his feelings for you?"

Stretching her arms over her head, she slipped off the stone and her house shoes sank into the snow. Finding the cobblestone path that led to the steps, she started back inside. "I won't focus on those feelings right now. I'm not sure if my heart can properly manage them yet, so until then, I will give my absolute all to skating and performing, so watch over me, will you?" Saying one last goodnight to her friends, she slipped inside the hot-springs and went to the room she shared with Souta. Her brother gave a muffled snore from where he was sleeping, and she smiled at the sight he made. Slipping the jacket she'd been given off, she sat down on her futon and lay back, holding it over her head as she looked at it. Cheetah print wasn't her thing, but...it had certainly started to grow on her.

-x-x-x-

Me: 0.0...hello. So, yeah, here is chapter eight. I am surprised to see you all here, as...I've been out of writing for so long, it feels, and it can take a bit to get back into it. Hopefully, this short chapter will suffice, I'm going to start chapter nine, but there is seriously, so much research that goes into this story. I have to read up on ballet, ice skating, competition qualification, judging and scoring system, the abbr. of moves such as CHSQ/FSSP/4S/3T/1Lo/2A and really...my brain may implode, but...I will write more. So, until chapter nine, I hope you all are well and taking care of yourselves. Love you all!