Sesshomaru's arrival at their makeshift camp is belated. The moon is already up, lighting Rin's ever peaceful expression as she sleeps. Jaken is tending the fire, but the job is quickly abandoned when he sees his master approaching.
"Lord Sesshomaru, you're back!" the toad cries.
Sesshomaru doesn't bother to say anything back and when Jaken shows signs of meaning to ask questions and make more fuss than necessary, he silences him with a death stare.
He's hardly in the mood for talking, especially when the conversation partner is the mindless Kappa.
"We leave in the morning," is all he says before traipsing towards the forest in a slow yet measured gait.
There aren't many moments in which Sesshomaru is preoccupied with thoughts other than those about power, or about Rin, and said moments are not cherished. For once, he feels imprisoned by his own wandering mind that seems to effortlessly take him back to the evening's events and to Inuyasha's question.
The fool demanded to know why Sesshomaru chose him, but he was given no answer. Who does the hanyou think he is to demand information from? He has no right to know Sesshomaru's mind more than anyone else.
Yet the answer is just as mysterious to the demon lord as it is to his hanyou brother. Why did Sesshomaru ask for this from Inuyasha indeed?
Thinking about his half brother so much is certainly unpleasant, but he can't stop it. His mind goes back to their heated conversation, replaying it again and again. When it fails to uncover any more truth than he already possesses, he recalls their coupling. Inuyasha was never gentle with him, and gentleness was never required, but this particular evening he was even rougher than usual, angrier, flinty in his actions.
Inuyasha bedded him just like he fought him, with desperation and lack of finesse. Sesshomaru was most pleased by it.
It is something he didn't see very often, not with his choice of enemies. Yokai, at least powerful ones, fight for honor above anything else and have little regard for their life. No true yokai he's ever fought made a run for their life, and certainly not one fought in order to survive . Yet Inuyasha, entrapped by his human side, is different. Fighting for his life is as tied to his ill-fated existence as eating human food is. He doesn't understand the concept of yokai honour; all the power he nourishes he does so in order to survive, rendering him no more than a mindless, savage creature. He's rather animalistic, despite being stained by human blood.
Every time they clash swords, he can't help but observe Inuyasha with a mixture of pity and admiration. He's the prisoner of his own miserable and unfortunate existence, yet he owns it. His power, his fights, they are all a means to an end Sesshomaru can't possibly understand yet is most curious about.
He observes Inuyasha with the same interest when they meet in musky caves and near sun-drenched riverbanks. At times, he even encourages the animalistic side of his brother and relinquishes his control for a moment, just to see what that brings him.
Sesshomaru makes a point not to accidentally try and kill Inuyasha next time they meet. He even goes out of his way to retrieve the sacred jewel fragment Inuyasha and his merry band are after. When he returns the artefact to him, the hanyou is rendered nonplussed.
"See that it doesn't get into the hands of other filthy humans," he spits the words with all the malice he can muster before making his exit.
To his surprise, he senses Inuyasha following him. It's hard to think he simply left his comrades without any sort of explanation right after a battle, but here he is.
"What do you require, Inuyasha?"
"I- Why did you give me this?"
"I have no use for it and your entire life seems to revolve around the trifling artefact. It might as well be better for it to remain in the possession of your miko instead of some power-hungry demon."
Inuyasha does not further question him on the matter, although his expression shows that he remains unconvinced. Instead, he asks something else entirely, something Sesshomaru couldn't have predicted.
"Can I see you? Tonight?"
The question is met with a raised eyebrow as time seems to stop for a second.
"We are seeing eye to eye now."
"Not like that. I mean, can we meet and… you know…"
"You wish to lie with me." It's not a question, and for once, Inuyasha doesn't treat it as such. He simply waits for Sesshomaru's answer.
He could say no, and he is tempted to. Their arrangement and the agreements that come with it never gave Inuyasha the power to summon him or require his presence. It is always Sesshomaru who arranges their meetings. It is always him who is in control.
"I don't require your presence as of now. You may leave," he finally responds, turning on his heels and preparing to make his exit.
"If I leave now, I won't come back."
Sesshomaru pauses. "What is it that you want, Inuyasha?"
At that, the hanyou seems to struggle, as if he desperately wants to give voice to something, but decides against it at the last moment.
"It's not fair, okay? You get to just call me whenever you feel like it and I have to come and satisfy the mighty yokai Lord. I'm not Jaken, I don't do whatever you want me without any complaints or without expecting something in return."
The hanyou's words are most curious to Sesshomaru. Ridiculous as they seem, he can't help but respond to them.
"I was under the impression that we both gain something from this arrangement."
"Well, I want more. I want to have a say about when we meet."
"No. Your service is no longer needed. You may leave."
"Fuck you, Sesshomaru."
The last thing Sesshomaru expects is Inuyasha to follow him; he certainly does not foreshadow being pushed against a tree truck by his mindless half brother.
It's a slip up, a moment of confusion that Sesshomaru foolishly allowed.
Inuyasha's lips are on his, kissing him with violence. Sesshomaru's anger engulfs him, so he wastes no time and pushes Inuyasha away before his instincts drive him towards a harsher path of reaction. Why exactly he avoids harming his half brother is not a question Sesshomaru bothers to ask himself at that moment.
"Is that your solution, you filthy hanyou? I refuse to lie with you and you intend to assault me?"
"What? No! N-No." his voice cracks as realisation creeps onto his expression. Once again he is next to Sesshomaru, holding his shoulders with his hands, preventing him from leaving the rough surface of the tree. "I only want you to- I want you to listen to me, I didn't mean to…"
"Imbecilic hanyou," is all Sesshomaru says before he pushes Inuyasha again, this time without holding back. His movements have enough force behind them to send the half demon flying into the nearest tree, but not enough to truly harm him.
Sesshomaru doesn't linger on. He flies away, not looking back once.