'Lizzy I believe that you like Mr Darcy,' said Jane that evening when they were alone in their rooms.

'What's not to like?' Elizabeth said in playful tones as she sat on the edge of the bed. 'He is handsome, wealthy, intelligent, and surprisingly kind and playful once you get through his barriers. I'd be a fool twice over if I denied it now.'

Jane came and sat down beside Elizabeth. 'True, but Lizzy, I think you really like him,' and she gently nudged her sister with her shoulder. 'In a special way.'

Lizzy looked aghast. 'What makes you say that?'

'I see the way you look at him,' Jane said gently. 'And you have this dreamy look in your eyes these days when you get lost in your own thoughts. Like now, as we were getting ready for bed.'

'Has anyone else noticed?'

'I do not think so, at least no one has mentioned anything to me. In a household where suspicions do not go unvoiced, I think that is reasonable evidence I am the only one to see it so far. I suspect most are too preoccupied with their own concerns at present, to really pay attention.'

'And yet you, Jane, are never too preoccupied to care about the concerns of others. You are the miracle amongst us all.'

'So you are not denying it?' Jane asked undeterred.

Elizabeth watched the dancing flames in the fireplace before answering honestly. 'Jane, I think he might be the most admirable man I have ever encountered. He constantly surprises me, revealing sides of himself that I would never have believed he possessed when we first met him.'

'He seems to admire you too,' Jane's voice lifting at the edges encouragingly.

'Oh, dear Jane,' Elizabeth said dismissively, 'it can never become anything like you are hoping. He is as good as engaged already, though it is currently only to an obligatory duty to his family. The day he apologised to me, we set very clear boundaries upon expectations. And I think I like him all the better for his honesty. That is in large part why he is so reluctant to be his true self in public – he fears giving rise to expectations. He asked if we could have a friendship devoid of that expectation – he asked,' Elizabeth emphasised, 'did not just assume or tell me that was how it would be. He sought permission and I granted it. I just did not know how much I would come to care for him at that time.'

'Do you think you are in love with him?' Jane asked gently.

'I do not know,' Elizabeth said. 'At what point does admiration and friendship change into love?'

Jane shook her head. 'I am not sure.'

'The more I know of Mr Darcy,' Elizabeth confided pulling her feet under herself for warmth, 'the more I realise just how much he shoulders on his own, and I probably do not even know the half of it. I think in his echelon of society, there are few that he feels he can trust. He is surrounded by people but I think he gets lonely all the same. When he began to open up to me, I discovered a man who was not only intelligent but willing to listen, a man with strong loyalties but also flexible. A principled man but one also ready to laugh and tease. How can any woman resist that? Perhaps I have been wrong to attempt it, but I had hoped to be the sort of friend he could trust; a safe place without selfish motives.'

'Dear Lizzy, I am sure that he knows he is safe with you.'

Elizabeth thought about what had happened that afternoon, the memory of holding, and being held by him. His vulnerability, his warmth, the strength of his arms, the feeling that there was something between them so precious and fragile she did not want to share it with anyone else, not even with Jane.

'Well, that is why,' Elizabeth explained, 'I cannot entertain any hope for something more. He needs to experience a love that is there to give, not to get. An unconditional love, such as you give to me. That is what I want for him more than anything.'

'I think you have just answered your earlier question Lizzy,' Jane said. 'However you got there, it sounds like you are in love with Mr Darcy.'

Elizabeth flopped back onto the bed, silently looking up at the ceiling above. No, she could no longer deny it. She was in love with Mr Darcy. 'Can you imagine the fun Papa would have with this situation if he knew. It would become a satire of star-crossed lovers.'

Jane lay down on her side beside her sister, one hand propping up her head as she looked at Lizzy. 'Dear Papa would not hold it with much reverence to be sure, but perhaps Mr Darcy might surprise you again, if he knew how you felt.'

'No, that would only make the task before him harder,' Elizabeth said emphatically. 'We have mutual respect and that will have to suffice. I do not wish to be the creator of more conflict within him. Fulfilling his parent's dream for an advantageous match might be all he has left to connect himself to them. I just… I just want him to be happy,' she concluded wistfully.

'I guess when all else fails, we at least have the privilege of feeling love and respect for others, even if we cannot attain it via a marriage.'

'I think your prospects Jane, are far more favourable than mine. Mr Bingley was fairly gushing over you today when we met in Meryton.' Pulling a blanket over the two of them Elizabeth gave her sister a fond nudge. 'I have bared my soul to you. Now it is your turn dear sister.'