As usual, I'm sorry for the yuuuge gap between chapters but also proud to put out anything at all! TW at the end.
Raven spent most of the next day in the little bedroom, sleeping on and off and trying to meditate her emotions into some sort of order. It was of little use - her mindscape was a warzone.
Part of her was grateful to Malchior and wanted to show it, but another part wanted to drown herself for entertaining the thought. Stronger still were the desires to punch him, curse him back into the book, or simply lie down and never get up again. Wisdom pointed out that none of these actions would be particularly helpful. With no clue as to what would be, the approach of dusk finally forced her to get out of bed and face the mess she was in anyway.
Malchior was sitting on the steps of the cabin's front porch as if he hadn't moved all day. He appeared totally relaxed, leaning back on his hands and looking out at the meadow. The scene would have been charming, if not for the blood-splattered armour.
At the sound of her approach, he turned his head and smiled sleepily. The nagging guilt in her chest was replaced with a fierce sense of annoyance. A normal person would have been pissed off by her extended absence, which had stretched hours beyond any reasonable watch shift.
"Why didn't you come and get me?" she asked shortly.
He gave a half-hearted shrug.
"You needed rest. And I was enjoying the scenery."
As if to underscore Malchior's point, an orange butterfly fluttered idly between them. His look of exhausted contentment deepened. So did Raven's scowl.
"Well, go now. I have to check in with Robin."
Before he could say another word, she held the replacement communicator up to her ear and jerked her head sharply in the direction of the bedroom. A universal signal for go away, no matter what century you were born in.
Malchior pushed himself to his feet obediently.
Azar, was he tall.
She averted her eyes until he was gone.
"Raven?" Robin asked in her ear, sounding alarmed.
"Just checking in. Again. Still no sign of anything worrying over here."
"Then why are you calling without video?"
"I'm outside now. If someone gains access to the call somehow I don't want them to pick up any clues about my location."
She was actually just sick of the new way Robin was looking at her - concerned, yet judgemental at the same time.
"Safety first." he said after a pause, though his tone brought the exact look to mind anyway. "Malchior tried anything?"
Raven rolled her eyes.
"Don't let your guard down now." her leader warned.
"Trust me, I haven't."
"Raven, that talk we had on the roof. About your feelings for him-"
She cut him off. "I told you, it's nothing. I'm not an idiot."
"All right." Robin said carefully. There was another pause. "Everything's quiet here too. Almost too quiet."
"Perhaps the Church has given up for the month."
Or they'd learned their lesson and were waiting until the last possible moment to pounce.
"I hope so. One other thing. I wanted to tell you that Jinx feels really bad about what happened at the wedding. And before you scoff, don't blame her for my mistake. I should never have assumed you'd gone home. If I'd come after you then maybe-
"Don't start on this either."
"If Malchior of all people hadn't turned up and got you out, I would never have forgiven myself." Robin insisted. There was no self-pity in his voice. Only the intense self-criticism of a rabid perfectionist.
"But he did. For better or for worse. I'll talk to you in a few hours." she said, and hung up before he could continue.
She looked out over the empty, darkening meadow. It felt like they were on a different planet compared with Jump City. Maybe she was actually safe.
An internal voice piped up in opposition.
Sebastian is going to get you eventually.
Others responded.
Malchior is going to stop him. Malchior is going to keep us safe.
I hope he comes back soon then.
I hope he falls in the shower and cracks his skull open.
Now's our chance - run! It will take the dragon forever to find us again.
Running from two men at once?
He's naked in there, you know.
Did you see the way he smiled at us?
Robin thinks you're losing it.
"Shut up." Raven muttered wearily, and settled in for the watch shift.
By the time Malchior re-emerged, it was almost 4am. Raven was bundled up in a blanket and halfway through the only book in the cabin (The Art of War), smirking in spite of herself at how obviously it had informed Robin's leadership style.
"I cut my hair." Malchior announced.
Raven looked up unwillingly. The armour was gone again. He was now clad in a black t-shirt and pair of dark blue jeans that were far too short in the leg, and his hair sat tidily at shoulder length rather than spilling wildly all the way down his back. It looked almost silver in the glow of the moonlight, and had developed a subtle wave.
"I should have known you'd be vain." Raven shot back.
He tucked an errant lock behind his ear, threatening a smug grin. Without all the blood and grime, he actually looked the age he'd claimed.
"So you like it?"
No I don't, she wanted to say. But there was no chance of delivering the line convincingly, so she pointedly returned to the book. She'd always had a weakness for pretty boys, and now he looked even more like prince charming.
Malchior sank into the neighbouring chair. "I was hoping we could talk."
Raven snapped the book shut.
"After dinner. I haven't eaten in over a day."
The mixture of canned beans and tomatoes she found in the store cupboard and threw together ended up burnt. She would have blamed it on the growing sense of dread over what he was going to say next, except she'd always been a terrible cook.
They ate in prickling silence, after which Malchior pronounced the meal "Interestingly sweet, but delightful all the same."
Raven's mind was whirling, desperate to come up with a distracting topic of conversation, when he absentmindedly took out the dagger. Finally, she realised where she knew it from.
"That's mine."
Malchior looked up in surprise, and then held the weapon out to her by its sheathed blade. She took it quickly, remember the church member's pallid face as blood poured from the hole it had torn in his guts. The handle was golden and gem-set, like something out of Mughal India.
"I found it in your room when I broke free of the book. There is something magical about it, yes?"
He was right, though Raven didn't know the details. Arella had pressed the knife into her hands on one of the rare occasions she'd deigned to visit the main temple, shortly after Azar had died. There had been no explanation offered alongside the gift. Raven wondered if she'd ever get the chance to ask her mother how such a thing had even made its way to pacifist Azarath in person. Somehow, it didn't seem right to pose questions like when or why in the shallow letters they sent back and forth.
"It's enchanted to always hit its target." Raven answered.
Malchior made a noise of appreciation. "I knew a thousand years of captivity should not have improved my aim."
Raven once again wondered just how many people Malchior had killed last night.
"Before we were interrupted by your friends back at the tower, you asked me why I came after you." he prompted.
"I've decided I don't want to hear your explanation." she replied.
Malchior responded with a look so intense she felt pinned to the spot. It felt indecent to be alone with him now, even though technically they'd always spent their time together that way.
"I think I will give it to you anyway." he said, after an achingly long pause.
"Whatever it is you want, I'm not going to give it to you. No matter how many pretty words or flattering sketches you throw at me."
"I used to want power." he admitted. "You see where that got me, time and time again."
She narrowed her eyes at the dramatics. She knew him well enough to know he was gearing up for some sort of grand declaration.
"I have learnt from my mistakes." he insisted, leaning forward seriously. "But you are right. I do want things. To be understood, for instance."
"You're looking in the wrong place then. I don't understand you at all." she said.
"No? Then why does it feel like this-" He made a gentle, sweeping gesture at the space between them. "-when we talk?"
Raven let out a huff of frustration, unable to understand just how he managed to wrest back control of every single conversation.
"So you want to waste your freedom chatting about the things we have in common? At some point we'll exhaust the subject of being outcasts, tormented by our inner darkness." She replied, her words becoming increasingly slurred with sarcasm.
"I am certain that would not be a waste of my freedom at all, but no."
"Then what?"
He looked at her as if she should already know the answer.
"What?" she spat.
"One likes to be delicate about these things, Raven."
"You said you wanted to give me an explanation. If I'm forced to listen to your lies, I at least want them delivered efficiently."
Malchior pushed the hair back from his face, looking a little put out. She tried to keep her eyes off his hands and fingers, which were long and elegant and covered in yet more tiny scars. A large signet ring with a banged-up onyx stone claimed the middle finger of his right hand. She hated that she wanted to know the history of it.
"All right. If this is how you prefer I go about it... I want you, Raven."
She instinctively recalled Azar's instructions for getting through emotional crises such as these. She even heard them in her deep, musical voice.
Remember that every moment, every thought and every feeling will pass soon enough. Resist the pull to get too attached, to claim any of it as yours. It may help to separate your soul from your physical body a fraction. The edges of your vision will go dark, but do not panic. Sometimes a little distance from life is the safest thing.
But Malchior was still speaking, and Raven didn't want to detach right now.
"I wish to court you." He explained. "Officially. I do not want what we had before, when I was trying to extract my freedom from you. I certainly do not want it to be how it has been lately, with you as my jailer and I your enemy. I want us to know one another as equals."
All pithy replies died on Raven's tongue. It sounded so simple when put like that. Like the two of them dating was the most normal thing in the world, despite being physically impossible just yesterday. But if this was his big plan to gain power over her, now didn't seem like the best time to unveil it. Surely it would have been more cunning to wait until her guard was down.
And if he's telling the truth?
She let the idea wash through her, but only for a moment. It would not do to seriously entertain it, as certain voices begged.
"You think you were my prisoner?" she asked, instead.
Malchior tilted his head. "Wasn't I? Not through any choice of your own. But I have always held the weaker position in our relationship, whatever form it has taken."
"It didn't feel that way when you had me in your claws."
A splash of colour appeared on Malchior's neck.
"That wasn't me." he murmured, looking down.
"Who was it then?"
For once, he had no reply.
"I'm not going to date you Malchior." she said finally. "I'm not an idiot."
The more she repeated that phrase, the less true it felt.
Malchior sighed heavily, but appeared alarmingly undeterred. "Very well. I shall stay and protect you regardless. I owe you at least that much. Once we stop Brother Blood, we can revisit the conversation."
"So you're acting out of some strange honour code then." she said, hiking the blanket up higher around her shoulders. She missed her cloak.
He let out a laugh of surprise at the accusation. "Oh, no. As you noted previously, I am acting out of selfish interests. This is just one of the rare times when what I want and what is right happens to be the same thing."
"You always know just what to say." she snorted.
"Spend a thousand years with only books for company and you too will find that words come easily." he replied, with a grim smile. "Now then... what shall we talk about next?"
"We could be silent."
Malchior laughed again, his smile genuine again. He was perhaps the only person in the world who found anything she said remotely funny.
"Come now, silence is unlike you."
"Silence is one of my defining characteristics."
"Perhaps with other people. Never with me."
To prove him wrong, she clamped down on the bitchy reply that threatened to escape. Miraculously, Malchior didn't push it.
They fell into what could technically be called silence, though to Raven it seemed incredibly loud. She tried to read her book, but was too acutely aware of his presence to actually follow the words on the page. The memory of what had just happened kept intruding, playing like a gif.
I want you.
I wish to court you.
I want us to know one another as equals.
"It is almost over." Malchior pointed out eventually.
He was right. The darkness was turning into gray dawn light, and the numbers on her communicator read 529.
There would be heady relief when the clock hit 556. But Raven knew now it would only be a temporary reprieve. The new moon represented fresh opportunity for Brother Blood. And if he failed again, there would always be another chance. Twelves chances a year in fact, for the rest of her life if the Church was determined enough.
"I just realised something." Malchior said suddenly. "Your powers. Now that I am more than mere paper, you can read my emotions."
He was right again. His feelings had been tormenting her from the second he'd arrived. Murderous rage, sweet relief, spikes of desire and just now, nauseating disappointment. But she couldn't trust any of it. Everything was always wonderful when it came to Malchior, until the whole thing shifted like sand underfoot and then it wasn't.
"We both know that you have the power to fool me that way, if you want to." she replied.
His mouth fell open.
"You have felt what I have been feeling this entire time."
She nodded.
He stood suddenly, obviously troubled by this information. Raven did too, letting the blanket fall to the ground. He towered over her enough already.
"I do not possess the knowledge, power or inclination to manipulate your powers. What you feel from me is real, which means you have all the information required to trust me!" he growled. This was the first time he'd acted remotely menacing toward her, but she didn't feel afraid because of that.
"Since I don't believe a word that comes out of your mouth, there is zero point in talking about this." she ground out.
"I know what happened when you first released me was... unspeakable. But there has been so much else between us since then. What more will it take?"
Malchior took a step closer, as if proximity would increase his power to convince her. He had the most expressive features Raven had ever seen, and the emotion currently painted across them was hurt. A small part of her believed it was genuine, but that part was going to have to be over-ruled for the sake of survival.
"When the full moon is over, I think you should leave." she told him.
"No." he said, without hesitation. "I would not go even if Brother Blood was no longer a threat to you, for I do not believe you want me to. Please, Raven. Tell me what you really feel. Not what would be safest, or what I deserve."
He was very close. So close, she could feel his magic calling out to her own.
"I feel… confused." she admitted.
His shoulders and face relaxed; frustration quickly replaced with something much softer.
"I wonder if there is a way I could help you gain clarity." he mused.
Fuck.
His gaze fell to her mouth, and in that second she knew.
He was going to kiss her.
And she was going to let him.
Fuck.
Malchior leant towards her, a question in his eyes. She was frozen, or at least told herself she was. When their foreheads were almost touching and she still did not move, he pressed his lips to hers.
The kiss was decisive but tender. His scent filled her nostrils - expensive soap with an underlay of something intoxicating that made her mind go completely blank. It barely lasted a few seconds, and then he was pulling away again.
Panic and want constricted her chest, and without thinking Raven grasped the front of his shirt to stop him. Malchior made a noise of surprised pleasure, which was instantly muffled as she parted her lips to kiss him back more deeply. He immediately responded in kind, his hand snaking to her waist to pull her closer. A great tension inside of her released, as if a ribbon cinched tightly around her lungs all her life had finally been cut.
From there the kiss became the desperate, passionate sort very quickly. There was no awkward repositioning or need to get used to one another's movements. They fit together instinctually, like it was something they'd done a thousand times before. Malchior seemed to know exactly when to give her a second to catch her breath and when to push for more, and where to place his hands and with how much pressure. Her own hands wandered of their own accord, feeling out the shape of him - his biceps, his back, the line of his jaw. He was warm and solid, and she wanted to be in contact with as much of him as possible.
With a jolt, Malchior backed into the wall of the cabin. She'd been angling him towards the doorway, trying to get to the bedroom, and had evidently miscalculated. Having him trapped had its own rewards however. She threaded his fingers through her own, briefly enjoying the unlikely sensuality of the gesture, before guiding his hand under her t-shirt.
Malchior withdrew at once, escaping out from under her by flipping their positions and taking a deliberate step back. He raised his hands in the air, as if he'd just been caught committing a crime.
"I apologise." he gasped in horror.
Raven felt as if she were watching herself from above as she silently took his hand back and placed it very deliberately on her breast. She both had no clue what she was doing, and knew a part of her had planned this long ago.
Malchior's eyes grew wider, and she pulled him back against the wall for a slow, luxurious kiss that seemed to address whatever misgivings he'd suddenly developed. At least until he dipped his head to plant kisses down her neck and drew a small moan out of her, at which point he pulled back abruptly and stalked to the other side of the porch.
"We have to stop." He threw back hoarsely, his body rigid. He wouldn't look at her.
"You're the one who kissed me." she said, her voice quiet to hide the fact that she was breathless.
"I intended only to kiss you. Chastely, at that."
"Well sometimes we get more than we bargained for."
Was she flirting? And did it really matter anymore if she was after what had just happened?
Malchior laughed shakily, though the broad line of his shoulders remained tense. "If I keep getting more than I bargained for I may lose control completely."
"And do what?" she asked softly.
"It's not something to be said in female company."
Raven suddenly remembered who she was with, and felt a familiar flash of anger shatter her temporary peace. Malchior walked the fine line between gentleman and lothario so well it felt like a game. Was he toying with her? Trying to show her how pathetic her attempts to deny any attraction to him really were?
"In a few minutes I'll regain my head again, and there's no telling whether I'll want to keep kissing you after that. So perhaps you shouldn't waste time talking."
Desire was fast curdling into shame, and she wanted desperately to reverse the process.
Malchior turned to face her. He looked beautifully undone, with his shirt rumpled and hair out of place. She had done that.
"If you do not want to kiss me, you should not do so." he said, each syllable drawn out crisply. "I would prefer you not play with my feelings that way."
"What?" Raven asked dully.
He crossed his arms, as if in need of a layer of protection. "I told you I wanted to court you, not engage in some sort of meaningless fling."
"And I made it clear I won't consent to be courted. Not after what happened last time." she replied in disbelief.
"You cannot trust me enough to take you out to dinner but you can to save your life and to– " he struggled for a moment, "-to ravage you?!"
The word rippled through her, with all of its connotations and promises. It was perfect. She did want him to ravage her, thoroughly, but only if he agreed to leave her alone to stew in humiliation and self-hatred afterwards.
"I see." Malchior said coolly. "It is late and you should rest some more before we return to your home. As I said before, we can revisit this conversation when Brother Blood is taken care of and you can think properly again. I am going for a walk."
And then he was striding away across the grass, bound for the treeline.
Raven looked at the time, heart missing a beat. It was 608.
Fuck.
Whatever game this was, she wasn't nearly good enough to be playing with the likes of him.
TW: Sexual content. Nothing too graphic.
Still, is it hot in here or...?