About me:

Hey everyone.

I'm The Raven. Yes, that is my favorite poem. Because it isn't just a poem. It's really...creepy. It's not because of the Teen Titans Raven, but the avatar is funny. XD

Anyway. I'm not a creepy person. I do enjoy tragedies and darker stories, yes, but I love fluff just as much as everyone else. I am currently doing Percy Jackson stories.

I'm a bit of a word freak. Yes, I went to Scripp's National Spelling Bee. It was fun.

Anyhow, I love literature. *feels guilty for only using pattern one sentences*

I also like participating on the Veritas forums, though I am not officially a Verita. My wonderful mummy is Minnie.

I am married to Peter Chi, the alter ego of Peter Ji. I do not really care much for Mr. Chi, but of course I love Peter, so why not? XD
Unfortunately, Peter Ji is Confucist and refuses to marry me in my current state.

I am a Christian, and I would never marry Peter in real life, but hey...it's the internet. I'm proud to be a member of one of the few heterosexual marriages on here. XD

Important Notice: BEWARE EVIL! WE HAVE WAFFLES!

Project Lucere

I am the founder of Project Lucere.

Our membership is expanding and I am very glad.

We are a group dedicated to cleansing the fandom by systematically targeting fics and flaming or C.Cing till they are improved or deleted.

Anyone is welcome to join as long as your own fics are decent. If you haven't written any, fine.

If you got a nasty review and you have come to complain, go ahead! I was a newb once and I understand. I am actually super polite to those who stand up for themselves. So please, complain away. ^_^

Our website is incomplete but soon will be up.

I love you Rachel! Thanks for moderating.

Also; if you like people on Lucere, I would recommend visiting the Literate Union and Veritaville.

My Stories

My Stories? Hmm, they aren't all so good. See I am mainly a persuasive writer, not a novelist.

The Fatal Flaw - World War II demigods...goodness.

Hero I am Not - Ick. More like Avatar reincarnated.

Shattered Shards - Psycho mentalist half blood.

Forever Young - Annabeth's Personal reflection.

Rain - Annabeth was kidnapped by weird gangs and...I have no imagination.

Funny Stories:

Any of my UNIT fics - Ha, these are funny.

Percy Jackson and the Battle of the Fangirls - The current state of our fandom. Bad.

Ahem: I have a very important announcement:

THE BEATLES ARE FINALLY ON ITUNES!!! YEAHAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!WHOOOOOOOOTTTTTTT!!!!

Composes self* There we go. I have let out my inner fangirl.

Goodbye, Fanfiction

Dear friends of Fanfiction;

Some of you I know well, some I don't, but this is all right. Sorry for the long PM.

I would just like to let you know you all had a positive impact on my life.

I came to fanfiction as a young fangirl, passionate about PJO and thinking my stories were one of a kind. After a chance encounter with Zoe Nightshade, I learned all about the world of Mary Sues, OOCness, and all the joys of being a FF writer. I met so many of you through Veritaville and eventually found myself starting Project Lucere, which is more successful than I could have ever imagined.

Fanfiction had become my life.

I have to say, however, that my spiritual side has been lacking a bit lately, and by lately I mean for years. I realized that I haven't really been focusing on what's important.

I realized after a beautiful spiritual seminar this weekend, I need a break. I've been "worshipping" different things in my life, making them my all. My relationships with friends, FF, schoolwork...I haven't been focusing on God or maintaining my relationship with him whatsoever.

I could go on about my personal testimony, though I doubt you all want to hear it. Quickly however, I realized there are people I want in life, people I desperately wanted to be with, who hurt me. I kept asking myself, "Why? Why don't they want me? Am I that wretched? That horrible? Is my face so ugly that they would reject me?" and the truth is, they just weren't that into me. This seminar made me realize the same with God. He wants us, mercilessly, and I ignored him. He might ask why wouldn't I want him? He gave up everything for me. He gave up his only relative and let him die in the most painful way possible. Not only that, he let him take on the pain of all my guilt, paid for every single thing I did wrong. And I still "wasn't into him." He gave me the ultimate sacrifice and I didn't really care. What kind of a jerk was I? I would never go through that much pain for somebody to like me, yet he did and I totally ignored him.

So basically, I need to get my life back on track. This whole FF thing...it's too much. I've been centering my life around it and I should be focused on my spiritual self.

So I think it is time for a break. And I mean a good, long break. Maybe till January, or June, or forever.

Why you ask?

One, like I said, I need to not focus on one thing so much.

Two? My parents have kind of made it a point to not chat online to friends. Even people I know in real life. So though they haven't seen me doing this and said no, I doubt they would approve.

And three? Project Lucere...it's been morphed. I didn't make it to improve fiction. I made it to delete crap. And now I realize...cussing at authors, screaming at them to get offsite...it's not very Godly. They are human (yes, I have thought about it long and hard and even fangirls must have a soul...I was one once too, you know?) It's a lot like Jesus and the Pharisees. The Pharisees were the "experts" and shunned sinners and other people who were less fortunate or less educated. They gave themselves fancy titles. They were a clique. Am I any different with my reviews? Should I shun people, even if they are wrong in what they are doing? Claim to be better than them in an elite group?

I should help others improve, not flame. But if I C.C, nobody gives a crap and nobody fixes their story. So reviewing is pretty much nill.

I hate to go, I really do, but it's time for a change. It isn't FF itself that is bad. It's what I've let it become and how I've used it.

I will truly miss you all, and I hope that someday, when I am stronger in my faith I can come back.

Jordan, I leave you in charge of Lucere. It is my hope that you shall change it into a place that is not an elite club or clique, but a place where fangirls can find new light, or where perhaps you write letters or something to fanfiction authorities (The way I see it now...if FF authorities really cared, they'd delete stuff that violates the TOS. That doesn't means it's okay to violate them, but...I guess I shouldn't have taken it into my own hands to delete things through flames. Or we could make a site with good fics on them. There are many causes in the world, but I think I can find a better one than cleansing a "fandom" that many people have never even heard of. There is so much more to life) but you can do want you wish with it. Project Lucere is yours now.

I don't want to say goodbye. I really have made good friends with you all. I just need to recenter my life.

So goodbye for now. Who said necessarily forever? I shall send a separate email to keep in touch for those I was closest to. Sorry for the spiritual ranting, but this is why I am leaving.

So a last note:

Zoe- Despite what you did, you introduced me to the world of good writing, and I shall be eternally thankful.

Storm- You were always a good role model, and I enjoyed talking to you.

Kay- I enjoyed your monthly prompts and your humor. You made it fun to be on Veritaville.

Theia- You're freaking hilarious and I shall never forget you. Your stories were an inspiration to me.

Sheva- I never really knew you well, but you truly seemed like an awesome person. XD

Des- I enjoyed your stories and your conversation. And don't worry about your hair. That picture of you you sent me was lovely. :D

Luna- Thanks for joining Lucere and congrats on your marriage. XD

Critic- You were one of the first people I met on FF, and I always enjoyed talking to you.

Gail- My fellow sister in Christ. :D Enjoy what is left of Lucere. I really enjoyed your company and hope to stay in touch. Did you ever finish that chapter in Corinthians?

Rachel- My beloved mod. Thanks for being there, and good luck.

Peter- ah, husband. I shall probably miss you the most. You were very good to me, and I enjoyed talking to you about your country. I know you are probably are thinking, "Kussah! (speak Japanese?) the religious fanatics got her!" and about how weak I am. Such a loss. Well, I am sorry, but I hope you understand that this will make my life better and more fulfilling. I will truly miss you. *hugs* I felt like I knew you best. Sigh...we never even had a wedding...oh well. Mail me, eh? :D

Jordan- Where to begin? You've been there since I was a newb and a noob. You too are probably annoyed I am leaving for spiritual reasons, but see Peter's message. I hope you will not be mad. Take good care of Lucere, she is my child. I put blood sweat and tears into making her a success. I sent Rachel a rough draft of the great mission if you care to use it, and you can ask for it. You are free to make a new site, edit the FH, or whatever you wish. Good luck, and I will miss you.

Yata- I will miss you so much! You were positive and a strong helper on Lucere. You always brightened up my day and I really hate to say goodbye.

Lobo- good luck with your car. I hope you're in good hands. :D Thanks for being on Lucere.

Mariposa- Good luck with Booktopia. I wish you success. :D

Minnie- *sobs* MOMMY! I shall miss my mum. *sniffles* you were so funny. I will miss your humor. Mail your daughter or she will cry.

Musa- You were a funny and positive person. I shall miss you.

Vanessa, Ira, Kelsey, Cookie, Rainbow, Karma, and all other members of Lucere or other Veritas I may have forgotten; thank you for your kind service or your quality companionship.

I shall truly miss you all.

Goodbye, and good luck.

shall steal Gail's thunder*

Esse quam veride

- for God demonstrates his own love for us in this; while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Here's my favorite. The Raven. Don't think it's hard to read. If you break it down, piece by piece, you'll get it. And at the end...It will really freak you out. I bolded the best parts. Oh, and if you get a chance, read the Masque of the Red death, or the Tell Tale heart. Real easy to understand. And horrific.

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore--
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.
"'Tis some visiter," I muttered, "tapping at my chamber door--
Only this and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December,
And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow;--vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow--sorrow for the lost Lenore--
For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore--
Nameless here for evermore.

And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled me--filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
"'Tis some visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door--
Some late visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door;
This it is and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
"Sir," said I, "or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,
And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you"--here I opened wide the door--
Darkness there and nothing more.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Lenore?"
This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, "Lenore!"--
Merely this and nothing more.

Back into the chamber turning, all my sour within me burning,
Soon again I heard a tapping something louder than before.
"Surely," said I, "surely that is something at my window lattice;
Let me see, then, what thereat is and this mystery explore--
Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;--
'Tis the wind and nothing more.

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stepped a stately Raven of the saintly days of yore.
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he,
But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door--
Perched upon a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door--
Perched, and sat, and nothing more.

Then the ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore,
"Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou," I said, "art sure no craven,
Ghastly grim and ancient Raven wandering from the Nightly shore--
Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's Plutonian shore!"
Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly,
Though its answer little meaning--little relevancy bore;
For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being
Ever yet was blessed with seeing bird above his chamber door--
Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door,
With such name as "Nevermore."

But the Raven, sitting lonely on that placid bust, spoke only
That one word, as if its soul in that one word he did outpour
Nothing farther then he uttered; not a feather then he fluttered--
Till I scarcely more than muttered: "Other friends have flown before--
On the morrow he will leave me, as my Hopes have flown before."
Then the bird said "Nevermore."

Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
"Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is its only stock and store,
Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful Disaster
Followed fast and followed faster till his songs one burden bore--
Till the dirges of his Hope that melancholy burden bore
Of 'Never--nevermore.'"

But the Raven still beguiling all my sad soul into smiling,
Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird and bust and door;
Then, upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking
Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore--
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt, and ominous bird of yore
Meant in croaking "Nevermore."

This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing
To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom's core;
This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining
On the cushion's velvet lining that the lamp-light gloated o'er,
But whose velvet violet lining with the lamp-light gloating o'er
She shall press, ah, nevermore!

Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer
Swung by Seraphim whose foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor.
"Wretch," I cried, "thy God hath lent thee--by these angels he hath sent thee
Respite--respite and nepenthe from thy memories of Lenore!
Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe and forget this lost Lenore!"
Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

"Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil!--prophet still, if bird or devil!--
Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore,
Desolate, yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted--
On this home by Horror haunted--tell me truly, I implore--
Is there--is there balm in Gilead?--tell me--tell me, I implore!"
Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

"Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil!--prophet still, if bird or devil!
By that Heaven that bends above us--by that God we both adore--
Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn,
It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels name Lenore--
Clasp a rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore."
Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

"Be that our sign of parting, bird or fiend!" I shrieked, upstarting--
"Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Plutonian shore!
Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul has spoken!
Leave my loneliness unbroken!--quit the bust above my door!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!"
Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming
And the lamp-light o'er him streaming throws his shadows on the floor;
And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted--nevermore!

MUHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Evilness.

Enjoy, people.