The Heart Won't Lie
by Castlefan6
Authors Note: This is Totally AU; Beckett has left for D.C and the Feds. This describes the activity of each, during the time away from each other, NO PROPOSAL, before she left, but plenty of ANGST. Can they find their way back to each other, or do they even want to? It blends some Canon dialog, courtesy of Dust Jackets Dot Com, then goes quickly and completely AU. What were each up to during this time, Taking Literary License to fill in the blanks.
A/N: CASKETT ENDING IS NOT GUARANTEED. : CASKETT ENDING IS NOT GUARANTEED.
I don't own Castle; I use the characters for amusement purposes only, except the ones I create.
Also, we take liberties with the timeline from Canon and use events to make this a more believable fiction, thanks.
Thanks to reader pmt0622 for the prompt:
A CASKETT ENDING IS NOT GUARANTEED. **************************************************************************/
Chapter 2
Outside Remy's
Immediately After the meeting,
"So that was the infamous Rick Castle, eh Kate?" Carl Villante asked,
"Yeah, yeah, that was Rick. I mean, he hates me, I just know it, hell, why shouldn't he?" Kate lamented,
"Were you and he engaged Kate, or is that the relationship you won't talk about with me. I mean, I know we haven't spend as much time together, but it's going on 5 months now, don't you think you owe me some explanation?" he pressed,
"Carl, we've talked about this, if you think, me being lonely, having one too many drinks and sleeping with you the second week I was in DC compares to the time Rick and I spent together, then we are on totally different planets. I know we've been together, well, if you can call it that, no one can know, and we have to sneak to meet even for a stupid lunch,"
"Kate, are you saying what I think you're saying, you're aren't happy with the arrangement we have? You knew from the first morning you woke in my bed what the deal had to be. I guess seeing your ex, has changed that.
"I'll take a cab; Rachel McCord will meet you tonight to take over the case from the 12th. You know you're not going to be popular at your old stomping grounds, nor with Rachel, her vacation was just canceled. Call me if you need me, Agent Beckett," he said with the I'm the boss voice and then he was gone,
Kate thought oh great, she just pissed off her boss, worse he had been her boyfriend and the only thing keeping her from running back to Rick and begging him to take her back. She couldn't believe how easy she had made it for him, and it only took three days into the second week and a few drinks before she spread her legs for him.
When had she reduced herself to that level, a convenience fuck? Meeting for quick lunches and sometimes even quicker romps in the sack, that only made her realize just how much she truly lost. Even after she and Rick had gotten together, the night she almost hit the pavement chasing her mother's killer, he had never made it feel cheap.
Now she felt as bad as it must have appeared to her co-workers, she had fucked the boss, not to get ahead, but to satisfy her longing for another man. How pathetic was that, and how much worse could it get. Was this who she really was?
Then the flashback of Demming with Rick walking away with Gina flashed back so vividly, answering her question. Rick had the tryst with Ellie, so she got Demming. He went away with Gina, so she found Josh, he wasn't paying enough attention to her so she almost got together with Vaugh.
The real reason why she refused to go to counseling with him was that she knew, she didn't know for sure if she would have let things progress with Eric Vaughn or not, and she had already hurt Rick enough.
She was about to find out just some of the consequences of no longer sleeping with the boss, in a few hours a very pissed off Rachel McCord who had been interrupted in her sexual escapade, the first time she had gotten laid in forever landed in New York to babysit Beckett.
XxX
Castle's Home,
Buena Vista Ave, Santa Barbara, CA 93108
David called from the car, and Rick was at the entrance waiting for his friend/therapist. She had been his friend a great deal longer than she had been his therapist, there was definitely a bond between the two. She had helped, well tried to help Gina and Rick, then when Kate refused to see her, with or without Rick, she had even called her therapist, Dr. Burke to suggest some topics to broach.
FLASHBACK
It was NOT successful at all, in fact, it caused a huge argument between them, Kate thought he had overstepped by asking his friend to call her doctor. In reality, he didn't even know what had transpired and had told Kate as much.
The evening cumulated in her calling him a liar, the moment the word was out of her mouth she regretted it. He got a look on his face, one she had never seen before, and walked out of the loft.
IF anyone knew where he went, they weren't telling her, not Alexis, Martha, or even Brian at the Old Haunt where she had gone, almost positive to find him in his office. Brian told her he wasn't there, but she forced him to show her the office, once again, a futile effort and one more person she had managed to piss off.
That was night one of 20 nights of not hearing a word from him, either through Alexis, Martha, or anyone she could badger or beg to tell her information. She stooped so low as to run his financials, nothing, he always carried a few thousand dollars cash on him, if he didn't want to be found, she would not be able to find him.
She never thought to think of his middle school girlfriend, AKA, Therapist, AKA BFF, if she had she could have saved herself a lot of trouble, and others getting pissed at her. Rick had shown up at Abby's condo, and she knew he was hurting, so he stayed with her for three weeks in her guest room. Talking every evening, and for the first time removing the blinders Rick had been looking at his, his what, girlfriend, his live-in, his lover? What the hell was she, and what did she want to be?
Abby eventually persuaded him to go home, and tell Kate, in open, honest, but kind terms where he stood. She asked him PLEASE whatever you do, don't throw her lies or misinformation in her face, the argument will only escalate.
He was in his office making edits on the last manuscript for the Heat series when she walked in the door, looking dejected and sad, then ran to his office when she realized he was home, finally.
"Rick, where the hell have you been? I've searched this entire city for you, why the hell do you want to worry me like that?" She got out as her first words,
He looked up, not saying a word, and returned to his work. She thought, oh shit, that wasn't the right thing to say, and something was different about him, he didn't look happy to see her for the first time in years.
"I'm sorry Rick, I shouldn't have said that, I just meant that I realized I was wrong and when I couldn't find you, I went out of my head with worry. I know Alexis and Martha knew where you were at, but no one would tell me, I mean"
"Excuse me, how do you know that or is that just your great detective skills on display again? Mother and Alexis knew I was safe, but not where I was at. They couldn't tell you, not any more than Brian at the Haunt who you threatened to arrest, not a wise move Kate. He's filing charges against you, you'll probably get off with a hand slap, but"
"Rick, I apologized to him, that's all he really wanted, he dropped his suit, so yes I know I acted like a crazy lady, but I was so worried about you." Kate cried,
"Really? You're going with that line? You were worried about me? What are you going to do in two weeks when you're in DC, and I'm in New York? Your itinerary came along with your airline tickets and instructions for the moving van arrangements.
"Mother opened it, I didn't but you may want to start thinking about what your future is going to be, and please, have them take me off as your next of kin, if you get yourself killed, I don't want to be the one to ID your body."
She turned and left the loft for her own apartment where she spent the last two weeks in New York except for one night at the Haunt, Rick had provided the party room for her going away party. Everything was there, everything but Rick, or his family. She thought to herself, he's wrong, he'll see, eventually, he'll come around," and continued with her party.
PRESENT TIME
The car slowed down and hadn't even come to a complete stop before Abby had jumped out and run to Rick, falling into his arms, "Rick, you beautiful soul you, God, I missed you, I missed our talks, are you doing, OK?"
He picked her up and twirled her around, kissing her gently, "Yes, I'm fine Abby, the bigger question is how are YOU doing, I mean, I thought I had a terrible experience. I'm so very sorry, I had a feeling, and well, I'm sorry I was correct." Rick said, still holding her close to him, talking into her hair, as he gently rubbed her back.
Dave had silently taken her bag and placed it in the large guest suite across the hall from Rick's bedroom. "My God Rick, this is a palace, what made you buy such a huge place, when you are all by yourself, oh my God, Rick, you ARE by yourself aren't you?" she panicked, and smacked Rick as she caught his eye movement, the same he had in middle school when she beat up other girls just for talking to her boyfriend.
He laughed his deep, sincere laugh, "To answer your question, Abby, I'm single as a pringle, and not even listed on any dating sites, so yes, it's just me here. Why did I buy it? My VP of Real Estate was looking at another place not far from here when he caught wind the couple who owned this were divorcing. Before all the ugly details got to the press, Thad had already purchased it, and well, once I looked at it, I fell in love with it." He smiled, and finally placed her back on the ground but held her hand.
"God Rick, who wouldn't, I love it and I haven't seen more than the garage and receiving area. How about a tour, I even brought my bathing suit in case you have a pool." She laughed, there was still the comfort between them, not as lovers but two friends. Abby had been with him through the dark days, and well, he hated his friend got hurt, but at least it was before she married the jerk.
"Do I have a pool? Was that the question Abbs? How about a session with a full body massage, then the sauna, then we can end it in the pool? How does that sound?" Rick smiled,
"Lead the way, do I look that stressed Rick? I've tried to keep my nerves in check, but, eh, well, it's only the second time in my life I ever got dumped. The first time the boy was kind and gentle, he never lied to me, and even kissed me goodbye when he had to move." She looked at him coyly,
He turned red, "Abby, are you talking about when mother and I moved in the 9th grade? I remember coming over to your house with some little doodad of a gift, and you crying when I told you we were moving across town. I even remember kissing you, that was my first kiss, other than relatives, you were my first." He smiled,
"So, you do remember, I never knew I was your first kiss, you were mine. God, I didn't want to wash my face, I wanted to remember that moment, your lips were so tender to a young crying girl," as she fumbled in her purse, and pulled out something sealed in plastic.
"That little doodad of a gift as you put it, was your most prized possession in the world, your lucky rabbit's foot." As she held it up for him to see,
"Oh my God, Abby you kept that little trinket all these years, I mean, I"
"Rick, it was the first time a boy had ever given me something that meant the world to him, the first time I was kissed, and the first time my heart broke, yes we were young but you were my first heartbreak through no fault of your own.
"When we re-connected in college, I was so excited to perhaps act on old feelings but you and Kyra had already become an item, and you were happy. That was enough for me, at least one of us was and I learned to be happy for you, even without me."
"Abby, I never knew, I mean they say guys are blind, but I never picked up on it, I mean,"
"You mean we were stuck in the friend zone, more than classmates, less than boyfriend-girlfriend status, it's the death zone for anyone who wants to pursue more than just friendship. It took me four years to reconcile myself that you would always be my first love, my first kiss, my first heartbreak, but we were kids. As adults, well,"
"Abby, I know you're hurting, and believe me, I understand. Let's enjoy the weekend as more than friends, but less than lovers, at least for now, OK?" Rick asked, his blue eyes locked on her beautiful green eyes.
"I understand, and I like that phrasing, more than friends, less than lovers, for now, and I agree. You need to grieve, and then go through the steps to get her out of your system before any relationship will work for you.
"You're well on your way for step one, create a different environment than what you shared with your ex." She laughed, and kissed him gently, "Come on, we have so much to catch up on as friends, then if you need Analyst Abby, we can deal with that.
XxX
Kate Beckett had received a terse text about an hour after Carl had informed her Rachel McCord would be her partner to take over the case at the 12th precinct.
"Beckett, this is McCord, I see you fucked up things with Carl, you spoiled my first leave in years, arriving at Gate 5, American 9:35 PM. Meet me at baggage claim, and if you're smart, which I have my doubts, DON'T BE LATE."
The warning about don't be late was bolded, underlined, and had a font larger than her regular text. She would be arriving at 9:35 PM, what the hell did that mean, rent a car, have a cab ready, what? Carl was pissed, hurt, and she was sure he felt used when he had walked away a short time ago. Now this message, what was she supposed to do. She chose to have a limo waiting, and go inside to meet McCord, quite a feat since she had never met the Agent before.
JFK Airport
Baggage Claim #4
9:30 PM
Beckett had made reservations at the same hotel she was staying at for McCord after checking to see if she had a room reserved, she didn't. The Esty Hotel was a four-star establishment, nice, not the caliber she had always stayed at with Castle, stop it, she chastised herself. It seemed that no matter what or where she was at, she couldn't shake the memory of the look on his face the last time she saw him.
She saw him everywhere she looked it seemed, especially now back in New York. She hated to think what her former fellow officers would think, her coming back taking over a case. She remembered the hate she had always had when the Feds came rushing in and didn't expect much different reactions, especially since they were surprising them with the takeover of the case.
She had walked the entire length of the terminal to be at baggage claim #4 then looked up at the sign to see that McCord's flight was now offloading baggage at carousel #54, the complete end of the terminal in the other direction. She cursed to herself, then took her heels off, and started to jog down to the new location.
She weaved her way between those who knew where they were going and those lost souls stuck in the middle of the aisles as if knowledge would be coming down from heaven to answer whatever question they had. She finally reached the new location at 9:46 PM and she didn't have to search for McCord, she was dressed in the standard dark pantsuit, and white blouse. What she was wearing that Kate hadn't expected was a scowl across her entire face as she checked her watch.
Kate walked up to her, and said: "Excuse me, are you, Agent Rachel McCord?"
"You have to be the dumbass Carl hauled me out here to babysit. In the first place, you NEVER identify me as an agent, understand? I will show my badge if people need to know what the fuck I do for a living. Second thing you're late, I told you not to be late.
"Agent, I mean Rachel, your baggage claim was originally scheduled to be on carousel 4, not this one, I was there since 9:20 PM. I RAN the entire concourse to get here so technically I'm not late." Beckett bit back,
"Were you here at 9:35 PM, a YES or NO question Beckett," McCord repeated,
"I just told you where I was at and the hoops I jumped through to get here. NO, I wasn't at this location at 9:35 PM." She spit out,
"Then you're late, end of the story, don't push it, Beckett. Did you arrange transportation and a room, or am I supposed to teach you how to travel as well? What the hell did you learn besides Kama Sutra positions from Carl. And don't think you're anything special, Carl gets into the pants of 60% of the new agents, did you know he was married?" Rachel asked, the blush of dark red filling Kate's face gave her the answer she was looking for.
"Yeah, I didn't think so. You new recruits, you all think you're something special, but you sleep with a married man, your boss no less, and believe the recruiting speech, where do you want to be in ten years. One day I was asked that question, today I'm the one asking, do you want to work on a bigger stage,"
Kate almost threw up, it was almost word for word what Agent Stack had said to her in private, the start of her thinking she was special, it was a fucking recruiting line, nothing more, and Carl was married? That bastard, she had limits, not many but she didn't cheat, well at least with married men.
"Come on Beckett, at least you did something right, but we're over budget for that hotel, it'll be charged to your expense account, and come out of your paycheck. Carl approved it before because you were sleeping with him, but things have changed for you,"
Kate started walking out to the limo stand thinking how true Rachel's last words really were, things had really changed, and not for the good.
TBC