#4. 4x05 Divide & Conquer (Additional Scene)

Divide & Conquer ended way too abruptly for me. I felt we received no real resolution regarding Martouf's death or how our favorite couple dealt with the aftermath of the Za'tarc tests. I believe this was a turning point for both of them, with what supposedly happened off camera being a pivotal moment.

Sam stood outside Jack's door as rain soaked through her leather jacket, and a bone-chilling coldness engulfed her. She didn't know what brought her over here, just that, after all but admitting her feelings for her CO in front of Janet, Teal'c, and Anise, and then Martouf's death soon after, she couldn't bear the thought of being alone.

Daniel, of course, had offered to come over if she needed a friend. She'd considered accepting, but he wasn't who she needed. She needed Jack.

"Carter?" Jack said, opening his door wide and looking around. "What the hell are you doing? Get in here."

She didn't resist as he grasped her hand and tugged her inside. "Christ, your soaked through," he pulled her jacket off and left it hanging on a hook in the entryway. "How long were you standing out there?"

"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I just needed to see you."

For a few short minutes, they stared at each other. A part of Jack was surprised by Sam standing in his house, while another part was relieved that she wanted to be there.

"All right." Hiding his concern, Jack quickly retreated into his bedroom and retrieved an old t-shirt and sweatpants from his dresser. He returned to his entryway and realized that Sam hadn't moved since she first walked in. Instead of handing her the clothes, he nudged her towards the bathroom. Laying them on the counter by the sink, he turned to her and said, "They'll be big, but they're dry."

She nodded and kicked off her soaked shoes. Before she could remove her clothes, he quickly picked up her shoes and left the bathroom. She stood alone for a few minutes before she started to change. She emerged a several minutes later looking a bit more composed. Her hair was still wet, but she no longer looked miserable.

"Thanks," she said softly, taking a seat on his couch as he sat in the adjacent recliner.

"Do you feel like telling me what all this," he gestured to her, "is about?"

"Martouf is dead," she said sadly, a single tear slipping down her cheek. "This morning he was flirting with me and now he's gone."

"I'm sorry, Sam," Jack replied with sincere remorse. He was surprised how he kept his own emotions under control. He didn't care for the Tok'ra in general, but Marty had been one of the good ones even though he knew the other man was enamored with his second. "I know you cared for him."

"I did," she nodded. "He was a good friend and will be missed, but his death is making me face the reality of our situation."

"Our situation?" Jack asked warily, unsure where she was headed after very succinctly telling him to keep it all in the room.

"I know I said we could ignore what happened today, with the Za'tarc tests, but I can't do it," her eyes sought his, pleading. "I can't pretend you don't matter to me."

Before he could think about, Jack left the recliner and joined Sam on the sofa and made a decision.

"Hey, c'mere," Jack said soothingly, pulling her into his chest and wrapping his arms around her upper torso. Every emotion he'd been repressing since the damn za'tarc tests came flooding forward as Sam willingly sank into his embrace. Her arms wound around his waist, her face buried against his neck. Time stood still as he squeezed his eyes shut and let her cry. Each sob that racked her body tore through him.

When he sensed the tension around her begin to dissipate, he leaned back slightly. Sam did the same, their eyes meeting, conveying with a look what they both were afraid to say aloud.

"I'm sorry," Sam finally said, looking away and breaking the spell between them. "I shouldn't have come over like this; it wasn't fair to you."

As she pulled away and shuffled back into the corner of the sofa, Jack's heart felt empty, heavy. Unwilling to completely lose their connection, he shuffled his body so that he was within touching distance again, and laid a hand on the cushion, close to her thigh.

"Sam," her gaze snapped to his at the use of her first name. "I—you matter. To me," he ran a hand through his hair. "You know that."

"I know," she said and pulled the rest of the way out of his reach. "But I should go," she said nervously, her emotions back in check. "I know this is the way things have to be."

"For now," Jack insisted, trying to give her something to hold on to. That was a lie, he admitted to himself, he was trying to give himself something to hold on to.

"For now," Sam agreed with a sad smile, got up and started to leave. He followed her as she jammed her feet into her wet shoes and grabbed her jacket and without a backward glance, he saw her steel herself as she yanked open the door,

Jack watched her walk down his steps, climb into her car, and drive away before he finally closed the door. For a brief moment, he leaned back against the cold wood. His heart was beating rapidly inside his chest as he walked to the bathroom and gathered up the wet clothes she'd forgotten about. Throwing them into the washing machine, he braced his hands against it and hung his head. His eyes squeezed shut, fighting the urge to scream out against the injustice of not being able to do and say the things he felt to the woman he loved.

With a curse, Jack lashed out, flinging the laundry detergent against the wall with enough force that is exploded. Blue soap covered the walls and pooled onto the floor. Without a backward glance, he turned off the light and closed the door. The first of many closed doors.