AN: So this is how I imagine the Severus from my universe after he makes the decision to become a spy. Let me know what you think :)

Day 12- Alone

Severus slammed his bedroom door shut behind him and dropped down onto his bed. Seconds later, someone knocked.

"Severus?"

"Go away, Remus," Severus called out. "I just want to be left alone."

"Come on, Sev, just talk to me."

Severus groaned and pulled one of his pillows over his head, trying to drown out his brother's voice. He wasn't in the mood to talk.

Everything was messed up. It was all going exactly like it should, like he wanted it to, but it was still so messed up.

Lily hated him.

And that was a good thing. It was the safe thing, and yet he hated how it made him feel.

Severus was going to join the Death Eaters. He had been planning to for a while now and whether his parents and brother liked it or not, he would be the most helpful to the Light, by going to the Dark.

He was going to become a spy.

It made perfect sense to him. It was set up perfectly. No one knew that he had been adopted three years before by Albus Dumbledore and Minerva McGonagall. Or that Remus Lupin, an actual shining light, was his brother. As far as anyone was concerned, he was just another Slytherin from a bad background, who had been drawn in by the Dark Arts.

He had been letting Lucius Malfoy think for months now that he was recruiting him, when really, it was what he had wanted all along.

His family was completely against the idea but there wasn't much that they could do to stop him now. At least not without putting him in more danger.

Everything was going according to plan. Except for Lily.

Lily who had been his best friend since before Hogwarts.

Lily who was the only good thing to come out of Cokeworth.

Lily who cared for him despite everything and who wouldn't stop believing that there was good in him.

He had to make her stop.

So he pushed her away.

He had been trying to drive her away ever since he'd made the decision to become a spy. She didn't know he'd been adopted either. She didn't know he was doing this for the good of everyone else. That he was on the side of the Light.

It was safer for her if she didn't know.

So he pushed and pushed until today, when he told her to go away and leave him alone. He told her that he wanted nothing else to do with her. He told her his plan to become a Death Eater. The very sort of Dark Wizard that hated her because of who and what she was.

He let her think that he thought those horrible and wretched things.

He watched as sadness and hurt filled those beautiful, green eyes. And when he could stand to see her no longer, he turned away from her and left.

He went back to the Summer house knowing that it would be one of the last times he ever got to be there.

Severus lay on his bed, in the first room that ever truly felt like his and for the first time in three years, he was alone.