Well hi, I see you have found my profile, here are some things you should know about me.

Name: Alexandra, but I go by Alex

Age: yeah...no

Gender: last time I checked I was still a female

Well, I think that's it. Feel free to message me at any time :)

Favorites:

Things to do: Read, watch Netflix, and does eating count?

TV shows: The Vampire Diaries, The Originals, Lost, House M.D., Pretty Little Liars, and Supernatural

-Characters

-Supernatural: Castiel, Dean, Sam, Crowley, Kevin, Gabriel.

- Couples: Castiel/Dean

-The Vampire Diaries: Damon, Enzo, Stefan, Katherine, Matt, Bonnie, Lexi, Alaric, Rebekah, Klaus, Elijah.

- Couples: Damon/Elena, Stefan/Caroline, Stefan/Katherine, Stefan/Elena, Damon/Bonnie, Caroline/Enzo, Elijah/Katherine, Klaus/Caroline.

-The Originals: Klaus, Elijah, Rebekah, Kol, Camille, Davina, Josh.

- Couples: Klaus/Cami, Elijah/Hailey, Rebekah/Marcel Kol/Davina

-Lost: Sawyer, Boone, Charlie, Claire, Sayid, Hurley, Sun, Jin and Desmond.

- Couples: Sawyer/Juliet, Sawyer/Kate, Sun/Jin, Charlie/Claire, Shannon/Sayid, Hurley/Libby.

-House M.D.: House, Chase, Thirteen, Wilson, and Foreman.

- Couples: House/Cuddy, House/Stacy, Chase/Cameron.

-Pretty Little Liars: Spencer, Hannah, Aria, Emily, Wren, Toby, Noel, Caleb, Mona, Jason, and Melissa.

- Couples: Spencer/Toby, Aria/Ezra, Emily/Paige, Emily/Maya, Hannah/Caleb, Mona/Mike

Movies: 21 Jump street, The fault in our stars, The Hunger Games

Singers: Ed Sheeran, Katy Perry, Maroon 5, Bruno Mars, Adele, and others that I don't remember right now.

I, Mysticroyals, do solemnly swear to review all the fanfics I read, regardless of the number of reviews, its age, or anything else. I have joined the review revolution.

Please read and copy this on your profile!

Let's all go back to our first story. You'd signed up for your account and waited patiently for the waiting period before new users could post stories. And then, finally, you hit the post story button, and waited. Don't we all remember how excited we were when we checked the review count and see we'd actually gotten a review? We didn't even care if it was a three word "Good chapter, update." (even though we wished for more.) And as the reviews came in, you felt that smile creep across your face. The excitement (however small) you get when you see the review count go up is always enjoyable.

Are we really so cruel as to deny someone that feeling? It only takes five minutes tops. Join the revolution, take the pledge and paste this onto your profile.

I, Mysticroyals, pledge to always try to thoughtfully review every chapter of every story I read. I pledge to not leave flames and only offer advice. I pledge to raise the review count, one chapter at a time.

Why is Fanfiction awesome?

Because 87% of all original endings suck.

Because 95% of all plot twists are either predictable or stupid.

Because my favourite characters always die.

Because sometimes evil deserves to win.

Because sometimes authors just don't know which of their own characters go together best.

Because most authors aren't willing to write multiple versions of their stories just so we can see every possibility that arises.

Because all stories shouldn't have an ending; there should always be another adventure.

Because sometimes there's no one your age and gender who you can relate to.

Because sometimes you want to be in that story yourself.

Because sometimes you have no other way to express the ideas in your head.

Because the possibilities are endless.

Because it's an escape.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't.

this is this cat

this is is cat

this is how cat

this is to cat

this is keep cat

this is an cat

this is idiot cat

this is busy cat

this is for cat

this is twenty cat

this is seconds cat

Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down. I fell for it. Please make sure others do to :D

Things to do in an elevator :

1) When a person in the elevator repeatedly pushes a button (such as "close" or "open") say, "Congratulations, you figured out that if you push the button 20 times, it works quicker"

2) When the elevator doors shut, assuringly say, "It's ok, they will open up again!"

3)Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"

4) Whistle the first seven notes of "Its a Small World" incessantly.

5) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

6) Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside down.

7) Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

8) When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

9) Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

10) Stare, grinning, at another passenger for awhile, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

11) Meow occasionally.

12) Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

13) Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

14) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

15) Stare at another passenger for awhile, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

16) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

17) When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "Is that your beeper?"

18) Say "Ding!" at each floor.

19) Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

20) Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

21) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

22) Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

23) Put a box on the floor and whenever somebody comes in, say "Do you hear clicking?"

I'm the kinda girl...

I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

I'm the kind of girl who would rather act stupid than smart.

I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for eating most of them.

I'm the kind of girl who in an awkward silence or someone says something awkward would laugh.

I'm the kind of girl who's not afraid to prank my friends.

I'm the kind of girl who would make my friends laugh by just being with them for a few minutes.

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8118423151811 = 98

And

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11141523125475 = 96
But ,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
120209202145 = 100

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2211212198920 = 103

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1191911919199147 = 118
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and
Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.

Random sayings

If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.

Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday.

Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them.

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

When in doubt, push random buttons!

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter.

You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people...

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking.

You know, you do this annoying thing where you open your mouth and then these things you call words come out. Yeah like that. Stop it.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss.

There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.

I'm not as dumb as you look.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Sarcasm is one more service we offer.

Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.

It's ok to argue with two characters on your shoulders.

Writing isn't a career, it's more of a mental illness.

Anything thrown hard enough should hurt.

Curiosity killed the cat, satisfaction brought him back, but stupidity killed him again.

Flying is simple, you just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Some say the glass is half full, some say it's half empty, I say, "Are you gonna drink that?"

All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.

When I was born, I was so shocked that I didn't talk for a year and a half.

Where there's a will...I want to be in it.

Do not disturb, I'm disturbed already.

The trouble with life, is there's no background music.

A clean house is a sign of a broken computer!

Do not walk behind me for I may not lead, do not walk in front of me for I may not follow, do not walk beside me either. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!

Don't piss me off, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

For people who like peace and quiet: Get me a CORDLESS PHONE!

I don't get even, I get odder.

If being an idiot hurt, then you would be in constant pain.

If I were any lazier, I would slip into a coma!

If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then throw it back at life and steal the oranges you asked for!

If life gives you lemons...throw them at someone.

When life gives you lemons, say "What else have you got?" you might get something else

In order to lose your mind, you have to have one in the first place.

I've learned from my mistakes, and I'm sure I could repeat them exactly.

Light travels faster than sound. That is why...some people seem bright until you hear them speak.

You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

An optimist is someone who falls off the empire state building and after 50 floors says "So far so good!"

If Fed ex and UPS merge, they would be called Fed UP.

Never drink water...if it can rust iron, think of what it can do to your stomach.

Chaos, panic, pandemonium, my work here is done.

Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible.

These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

If you found these just too funny, put them on your profile too!

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em.
If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em.
If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em.
If ya can't kill 'em, you're screwed