DISCLAIMER: None of these characters, or the original story, belong to me, but to Akira Toriyama and all his associates. This is just an adaptation and I will not get any profit from it. This message will self-destruct in three... two... one... ... Kidding.

A.N.: First of all, I have to say that English is NOT my first language, and I am still learning it, so I would appreciate it if there are no senseless complaints about my grammar (still on it, but it is far from perfect yet) or my style. I am doing my best to learn and use the most common expressions in English, as well as others not so common. Thus, I accept, and even encourage, any constructive criticism meant to help me improve my English.

At the same time, I am trying to write in British English, save for some characters, who will speak in American English, always as far as my knowledge allows.

And now, without further ado, let us kick off.

text between 'apostrophes', dialogues

text in italic, thoughts (although I usually specify it nonetheless) or emphasis

CHAPTER 1

STRANGE CREATURE, THIS GIRL

The sun was rising and everything was calm in the forest around Mt. Paozu, at least as calm as a forest could be. Birds tweeting, the rest of the animals making every sorts of sounds, but it was typical in a forest after all. But there was another sound which was not typical in a forest that outmatched the common ones: a tree trunk, directed by a strange boy with a tail carrying a saw larger than him, was rolling down a hill, approaching a small house, almost a hovel, discomforting the inhabitants of the forest. Dressed in navy robes tied with a white belt, he looked apparently strong despite his short height, his arms separated from the body to enhance his balance, which was perfect. He seemed to be a common kid at first sight, at least without focusing on the detail that he was living in a forest, but at a more attentive sight, nobody could miss the tail without wondering why this boy might have a tail in the first place. Well, something else that might catch the eye of any observer would be his curious hairdo, which was smashed in the centre and spiky in the sides, almost unnaturally combed if combed at all, almost made on purpose. Apart from that, he looked like another boy, nothing special, right?

Wrong.

When the boy reached his destination, he hopped down the tree trunk and grabbed it, throwing it up to the sky with impressive strength. After that, he jumped towards it and, with a series of well-aimed punches and kicks, he cut the trunk in several pieces, piling one after another by themselves, forming a pyramid with extraordinary precision. At the same time, the boy landed gracefully and smiled proudly.

'Ok, I have the firewood,' he said to himself cheerfully, satisfied with his skills. 'Now it's time to get something to eat.'

So there he was, looking for an appetiser, unaware of his own destiny, which was going towards him in the form of a young girl in a car. Dressed with a blouse and a skirt, both pink, she was astonishingly beautiful. Her blue hair was tied in a ponytail and, despite being merely a teenager, she was a great driver. She was managing to drive at high speed in those sloppy, dangerous roads with outstanding expertise, guiding the car with one hand while she was grabbing a strange device of her invention with the other, looking at it sometimes, as if guided by it. She suddenly stopped the vehicle and stared at the device more attentively, lost in thoughts.

Hmm, maybe this way?, she thought, pressing a button located at the top of the device; her destination did not seem to be clear after all, for she was still pressing the button, as well as rolling it, in order to get a better perspective of whatever she was looking for in the device. Or maybe going down the mountain? In any case, it's near, I'm sure, and I'm going to get it.

So the teenager went on, driving like crazy, eager to reach her destination as soon as possible, it seemed.

Meanwhile, the boy was still looking for his meal, but he could not decide what he might eat that day and he was murmuring to himself, trying to make a choice.

'I might hunt a tiger, though I ate tiger yesterday,' he muttered. 'I might eat bear too, but I don't know…'

He heard the sound of water falling down a waterfall and, by looking at it, he finally decided what to eat.

'Fish,' he said. 'I haven't eaten fish for a while.'

So he went towards the waterfall and, after jumping onto a stone in the middle of the river, he undressed himself and started to fish in a strange manner, using his tail as bait. He had to wait for a short time before a huge fish saw the bait and started to try and munch it. But the boy moved his tail just in time and the huge fish emerged from the water, precisely what the kid was expecting, because he jumped towards it, fishing it with a side kick effortlessly. Back on the road, obviously dressed again, he was already slurping while he was dragging the enormous fish towards his hut.

But not everything went as planned. Suddenly, he heard an unfamiliar noise behind him and, in the nick of time, he avoided being run over by the strangest thing he had ever seen. It was large, larger than a bear, with a shape he had never seen before. It seemed to be some foreign monster or something, he did not know, but he did know it was unfriendly and about to steal his food, so he counterattacked the devious monster before it made another move against him, and his attack was devastating. Showing an extraordinary strength, he raised his enemy over his head and threw it as far as he could, breaking it.

Wait, have I broken that thing?, he thought, puzzled, while he was reaching for his weapon, a red staff, before pointing at the monster with it.

'You're not going to steal my fish, you monster!' he yelled. 'Come and fight me!'

Suddenly, something strange happened: a person emerged from the monster! Nervous, the kid aimed at his new target, ready to fight again.

'You're not going to defeat me, not even after turning into a ghost!' he boomed.

The person-like ghost grabbed something weird and aimed at him with it. The kid kept alert, just in case, but nothing happened.

How strange, he thought, approaching it, still armed with his staff, ready to react in case of a sucker punch. What's going on?

The girl was now driving on a better road. It was not good, but it was far better than when she was descending that damned mountain. Now she was going up again, yes, but that was different, more comfortable. Besides, she was near the target, which was great. Soon she would get it and go to the next one.

Only a kilometre more and I'll get it at last, she thought, excited, while looking at her device again for a second, without noticing she was on a blind hill.

But that second of distraction would have been fatal for her. When she looked back at the road, she realised she was about to run over a kid, no less! Horrified, she broke the car as quickly as she could, but it was not enough.

Oh, Kami, forgive me!, she thought, desperate. I couldn't help it! I hope he's still alive!

He was, fortunately, but he was pissed off and that was not good, at least for her.

'Whoa! What's happening?' she shouted when she realised she was suddenly being lifted by a mysterious force!

After that, she felt herself flying for a second before crashing, the car totaled, and she sighed in relief for being still alive before managing to get out of the destroyed car.

'You're not going to defeat me, not even after turning into a ghost!' she heard, while desperately trying to get out of the car. When she managed to do it and saw the boy carrying a red staff, aiming menacingly at her with it, she grabbed her gun and aimed at him, determined to kill him to defend herself.

Wait, he's only a kid, for Kami's sake, she thought, dropping the gun down. I can't shoot at a kid.

Then she saw the kid going towards her slowly, still pointing at her with his staff, and she gulped, terrified. He seemed to be puzzled, but she could not feel safe anyway.

Oh, no, what's he going to do to me now?, she thought, trembling.

'I'm going to punish you for trying to steal my food, ghost!' threatened the boy, and he seemed to be serious about that, because he was already raising his red pole in order to hit her.

'W-wait, I'm not a ghost, I'm a human being!' she said desperately, trying to negotiate with the little runt before he broke her head the same way he had broken her car.

'What?' he asked, puzzled, stopping the attack. 'A human? But you're too different from me and you emerged from that monster like a ghost.'

'It's not a monster, it's a car!' she yelled. 'Haven't you seen a car before? Or a person?'

'Apart from my grandpa, no,' said the boy. 'Don't move a muscle, I have to check you.'

'You what?' she yelled again, while he was indeed examining her, cautiously walking in circles around her, his staff at mere inches from her. 'What are you going to do to me? Whoa, you pervert!'

He had lifted her skirt up with the pole, so her accusation was completely justified. When he asked her what a pervert was, it was the last straw.

'You are a pervert! How dare you lift my skirt up with that staff of yours?'

'You mean that if I lift that thing with my hand it is better?'

'No, you moron! It'd be worse!' she roared, covering herself with her hand to prevent him from lifting her skirt up again. 'Don't do that to a girl like me ever or you'll regret it! Have I made myself clear?'

'Wait, are you a girl?' he asked, ignoring the threat, and she nodded quickly, still furious, which he noticed, so he apologised. 'Sorry, I thought you were a ghost. No wonder I can touch you then.'

'So you would've abused me if I'd been a ghost?' she grumbled, crossing her arms. 'You're not fixing it, you know.'

'Sorry,' he apologised again. 'My grandpa told me that if I ever met a girl I should be nice to her,' he stated. 'Since you're a girl, I'll be nice to you. I'm inviting you to come with me to my home. I'll fix you something to eat as an apology, it's the least I can do.'

'I have to think about it,' she grumbled. 'You've been very rude.'

He apologised once more, but she was not paying attention to him, instead she was examining her device for a moment. She seemed to be really near her target, because she nodded in approval.

'Ok, I'll go with you,' she finally accepted. 'But don't do anything funny or you'll be sorry.'

'I don't know what you mean about something funny, but I'll do what you say, of course,' he said. 'This way, follow me.'

'Why have you lifted my skirt, by the way?' she asked, still annoyed. 'You're still too young to think about girls and stuff like that, especially when you act as if it's the first time you see a girl.'

'It is,' he confirmed, nonchalantly. 'I didn't know you were a girl, I've been living here since I was a baby and the only person I've seen is my grandpa… before you, that is. You seem different, very weak.'

'Well, I'm not a brute capable of throwing a car or pulling a huge fish, but I'm not a weakling either,' she countered, slightly offended. 'I would've killed you with my gun easily.'

'I don't think so,' he said calmly. 'I've heard of those "guns" from my grandpa and they're not that dangerous. My body's made of steel and I'm super strong too. Nobody can beat me in a fight, my grandpa trained me in kung-fu. But you're different to him indeed, for example you don't have any tail.'

'No human being has a tail,' she assured.

'I'm a human being and I have a tail,' he said, effectively moving it gracefully. 'Now that I'm thinking about it, though, my grandpa didn't have any tail either…'

'See? He hadn't!'

'But my grandpa was very weird.'

'You're the weird one, not him!' she boomed. She sighed afterwards. 'It's not real, is it?' she opined. 'I mean your tail. I mean, I don't know why you have an accessory like that, but if you think it's cool I tell you it's not cool at all, you should take it off and throw it.'

'I can't, I've had it since I was a baby, or so my grandpa said,' he said as they approached the hut. 'Here we are, this is my home. Grandpa, we have visitors, a girl no less!'

She examined the little house, but she could not see anybody else but the boy. It was strange. Who was he talking to? That was when she saw it.

'Oh, finally, I've found it, the Dragon Ball!' she shouted, pushing the boy to reach a golden ball with four orange stars within it, but the kid pushed her back and took the ball back from her.

'Don't touch my grandpa!' he ordered, keeping the ball away from her sight. 'Not even a girl is allowed to touch the ball he's been turned into! It's a memento!'

'Wait, you think the Dragon Ball is your grandpa?' she asked, shocked.

'Exactly, and you can't touch him!'

'Don't be ridiculous, that ball isn't your grandpa,' she assured, looking for something inside her handbag. When she ended her search, she showed two balls similar to the one she wanted. 'See?'

'My! How is it that you have two grandpas?' he asked, astonished.

'No, they're not grandpas, they're Dragon Balls,' she explained. 'There are seven of them throughout the world and I want to get them all. Once I get them, I can summon a mighty dragon, called Shen Long, which would grant me any wish I made, or so the legend says.'

'Then what happened with my grandpa?' he asked, trying to understand. 'One day he disappeared and I could only find the ball, so I assumed a black witch turned him into the ball. And now you're telling me there are more balls like that? What are they, more hexed people?'

'No, they're magical balls, but they don't hex people on their own,' insisted the girl. 'Trust me, the legend's true. I've heard that a guy gathered them all, made the wish to be king and the dragon granted his wish! It's been a long time ago, but that proves the legend's true. Do you understand? Any wish, whatever you want.'

'Anything?' he pondered. 'What would be your wish?'

'Well, firstly I thought about wishing for an endless basket of strawberries, but now I'm thinking about wishing for a nice boyfriend,' she confessed, blushing slightly. 'What about you?'

'I dunno, I haven't thought about anything yet.'

'Well, what about coming with me?' she suggested. 'You said you're a warrior and a warrior must protect weak girls like me.'

'You said you're not weak.'

'But I'm not as strong as you are, and I'm sure there are people stronger than you out there,' she insisted, tempting him. 'Men should travel to grow stronger, or so I've been told. Do you want to come with me? This way we won't be alone again.'

'If you say that I can be stronger if I travel with you, I'll accompany you,' he decided. 'I'm Son Goku, by the way.'

'I'm Bulma,' she introduced herself. 'Nice to meet you, Son-kun.'

'Likewise,' said Goku, visibly trying not to giggle, and she noticed it.

'Don't laugh at my name, I'm warning you,' she threatened.

'But your name's too funny,' he managed to say before roaring with laughter. 'S-sorry, I-I…' he started to laugh again, he could not help it.

'I knew it,' she grunted, annoyed. 'Stow it, ok? I don't like the name! It's not funny, it's annoying!'

'Ok, don't be angry.'

'Fine,' she said, finishing the subject. 'Let's go. And while we're travelling, I'll tell you the most notable differences between men and women and how to see those differences. It's very important, so pay extreme attention…'

This way, Goku and Bulma started a journey that would lead them to a great adventure, yes, but it would not be easy to endure, for it was full of dangers. The first one arrived too quickly in Bulma's opinion, just when she separated from Goku to go take a leak, or so she said, but Goku "translated" it into going to pee, easier in his opinion. He wondered why she was going so far though, and why she had to hide to pee when she could do it right there, upon a tree, like everybody else, in his experience. If all the girls did that, girls sure were weird.

But his thoughts were abruptly cut out when he heard her yelling again. He sighed. Girls were weird indeed, they could not stop yelling for a minute.

I suppose I have to go there and see why she's screaming this time, he thought.

When he approached her, he saw the answer by himself. She was in danger. A pterodactyl had grabbed her and it was taking her to its nest when he appeared. Fortunately, the vehicle they were riding… a motorbike or something like that he heard her calling it, could fly while running on a steep slope, so he did the same she was doing to make it move and, finally, it flew, but it was not enough and he had to make his magical staff grow so that he could hit the dinosaur and save her. Well, sort of, for she was still complaining because she had wet herself. As far as he was concerned, if she simply had done it upon a tree as everybody else, as he had thought before, she would not have had any trouble, but it did not matter anymore.

'Stop teasing, Son-kun!' she exclaimed, white like marble. 'I've never been so frightened in my whole life and you're still mocking me! This isn't my idea of being nice to a girl like me!'

'C'mon, I've saved you, haven't I?' he said, shrugging. 'But it happens because you've gone too far to pee. I would've done it upon a tree, it's easier and everybody knows it's the best.'

'Oh? And how do you know it?' she complained. 'You'd never seen a person before me! You can't know it, right?'

'Well, I've seen the animals…'

'But I'm not an animal, I'm a girl!' she roared, furious.

She had a point, of course. She was the first girl he had ever seen after all, maybe girls were different. He remembered his grandpa told him they were slightly different, but he was not paying attention at all, so he could not know the details. He shrugged again and let it be; definitely, it did not matter.

But that was not the last danger they had to face. In fact, that was the first of a very long list of dangers; it seemed the world was more dangerous than they expected.

But it had good things too, and you can learn a lot of things just by spending the night out.

That first night of his journey, Goku learned many things: the first one, that Bulma was some sort of a good witch, in his humble opinion.

'It's not magic, it's science,' she had said to explain how she managed to make a house appear in the middle of nowhere.

She had just tossed something she called a Hoi-Poi capsule, and tadaa!, the house appeared! And, when he entered, light came forth, just like that, even though it was dark outside!

'Oh, come on, Goku!' she complained. 'Don't tell me you don't know anything about electricity. Are you that dense?'

But that was not all she could do. There were very tiny people inside a box she had on a table! She simply rolled her eyes and let it be. Maybe there was no explanation? Not to mention Bulma herself. She had a butt on her chest! Even though she explained to him that it was not a butt, but her breasts, he did not understand how come she had those round bulges on her chest. It was simply weird to him, like a whole lot of other things he was encountering along the journey, and that was his first day out of home. What would he expect the next day?

But there were more adventures waiting for them. The next day, just as he awoke, Goku saw Bulma on the bed, in an odd position, with a leg on the bed and the other out of it. He looked at her with confusion and centred his sight on her crotch, curiously. He noticed it was slightly different from his grandfather's and, curious, he placed his hand on it. Confused now, because it did not feel like it was used to, he took the panties and saw what they hid. With the surprise, he yelled, waking her up, and the panties went flying out of sight.

'What happened?!' she exclaimed, altered.

'The-the balls… you don't have them… why…?' he babbled, frightened.

'The Dragon Balls!' she yelled, associating the vague explanation with the golden balls they were gathering, fortunately. She could breathe again when she saw the balls in their place, hers in her handbag and his in his bag.

Thanks Kami they're here, she thought, relieved. He's given me the chills for an instant, dammit! The little bugger and his silly dreams…

'That was a nightmare, Goku, don't worry, it's okay,' she calmed him, and calmed herself too, trying to control her breath. 'I'm getting ready for the trip, you can do whatever you do in the morning.'

Goku nodded and went out of the house, stretching his muscles, but with the idea of the lack of balls in Bulma's crotch in mind; it bugged him for some reason. He was starting his training (breaking some boulders with the pressure of his own arms would be enough for a warm-up), but something got awry: one of the boulders was, actually, a giant turtle. A speaking giant turtle by the name of… Kame, or what was the same, Turtle. Wow, original indeed.

Like a dog named Dog, thought Bulma, dressed with just the pink nightgown she had slept with and nothing else, thanks to Goku's curiosity, not that she was aware of that detail though.

Meanwhile, the turtle was saying that it was looking for the sea, but it seemed it was going in the opposite direction, so Goku decided that he would help the turtle reach the sea again. That was a waste of time, in Bulma's opinion, but she had no choice but to help him or she would find herself alone in the middle of nowhere, with some dinosaurs strolling nearby to boot.

No, definitely I'm safer with him, no matter his antics, she thought, joining him. On their way to the sea, though, they got mugged, but Goku was strong enough to prevent the mugging, fortunately, and there were no more incidents until they reached the sea. The turtle, as a token of gratitude, brought them a mysterious old man who answered by the name of Kame Sennin.

Just as I thought, a waste of time, thought Bulma, annoyed, when, after a long wait, the one named Kame Sennin stood before them. A senile old coot with a naff outfit.

It was really gaudy indeed. He was a short, bald old man, with a thick white fu-manchu mustache and beard. He was wearing sunglasses, beach clothes and a turtle shell on his back for some reason. He sported a walking stick in his right hand, as long as he was tall. However…

Wait a minute, thought Bulma, who would bet she had spotted something underneath his beard. When she stared at it, she realised it was something important. A Dragon Ball! Why is he wearing a Dragon Ball as a pendant? I have to get it no matter what!

Meanwhile, Goku had received a new means of transportation, a magical cloud on which he could mount. Only he could though, because the old hermit tried to ride it and, for some reason, the cloud did not cooperate. It went intangible when he hopped in, making him fall on the ground. But, when Goku tried it, the cloud considered him a worthy rider and let him fly on it.

'The Kinton cloud is very selective,' explained the old man. 'If your heart isn't pure enough, you can't ride her.'

My, it's really useful then, thought Bulma. I wonder if I can ride her too.

'Excuse me, but I think I should get some compensation for my efforts too,' she said, trying to get the Dragon Ball hanging from his pendant. 'I wasn't just accompanying them, y'know.'

'Did she help you too, Kame?' asked the old man.

'Of course I did!' Bulma assured. 'I brought him fish and salty water, and I guided them to the sea with a map! Without me, they'd be wandering about who knows where!'

'And what do you want as compensation, like you said?' asked Kame Sennin, raising an eyebrow.

'Well, I was wondering if you could give me that pendant, for example,' she approached, pretending shyness. 'It's not much, is it?'

'Oh, that,' said the old man, showing the Dragon Ball. She nodded energetically, and that was her mistake. Never ever show so much eagerness for something you want in a negotiation, or it would get much more expensive than in other circumstances. He smirked. 'I can do that, but on one condition.'

'Yeah, just ask,' accepted Bulma, eager to get the ball, and the old man knew it.

'Well, you can show me your panties in exchange for the pendant,' offered Kame Sennin, nonchalantly. 'What do you say?'

'Are you crazy?' boomed the turtle. 'There's no way she would accept that!'

'Spare me your complaints, Kame!' spat the hermit. 'I wasn't talking to you! I deserve some panty peeking sometimes, y'know!'

'Really now?' complained the turtle, embarrassed. 'I mean, really? Now I know why you couldn't ride Kinton, you're not pure at all!'

T-the panties?, thought Bulma meanwhile, aghast. What a pervert! Who does he think I am? Some harlot? I mean, I need the Dragon Ball, but… really? Disgusting!

However, she had no choice but to accept the condition, no matter how preposterous or perverted it was. He would not listen to any less dirty alternatives after all, so she had to comply and, for a second, she pulled her nightgown up, showing him everything. It must not be forgotten that she was wearing nothing but the nightgown after all. Imagine the embarrassment when she noticed it, later at the house, when she saw the panties on the floor. Bonus points when she discovered that it was Goku's curiosity's fault. The mother of earfuls ensued.

'Don't you dare take a girl's panties off her ever again!' she shouted with all the strength of her lungs. 'Unless she specifically tells you, at least! This is not how to treat a girl nicely!'

Goku nodded apologetically and that seemed to settle things for the moment. But Bulma was absolutely livid, so Goku understood that taking a girl's panties off was a very bad thing to do and he promised to himself that he would not do such a thing again… unless she specifically told him, he remembered she said.

Curious, he thought. Only if I get her permission, I can take her panties. Ok, I'll remember that. Although I wonder why she doesn't have a pillow with balls like Grandpa's, but that strange slit instead. That's why she's so grumpy sometimes? Or that's what all girls have instead of the wee-wee? That's why she has to hide to pee? Girls sure are weird.