Hey, guys. This is the fourth short and unlike the past 3, this one was a canceled planned short in the Roger Rabbit franchise. It was in the middle of development but was scrapped. Which is a shame but I decided to do the shorts and the other 3 after some justice. Hopefully, my take on this canceled short is good enough to match what would have ben a good premise. Anyway, Roger Rabbit belongs to Disney not me. Let's get it.
====There's A Hare In My Soup======
The cartoon intro begins with Roger Rabbit smiling in the portrait before the title cards were shown. The cartoon begins afterwards..
Our favorite rabbit was at a fancy restaurant of sorts but not actually to eat there. He was there to work here and the look on the manager Cedric's face was that of no nonsense. Roger was standing waiting for orders as the manager gives him a lecture.
"Now remember, Roger. Your job is to serve our guests and keep them satisfied. This restaurant has been in good reputation and we have no truck whatever to dilly-dally. And if anything goes wrong due to your antics, you're going to be the one on the plate! Is that clear?!", Cedric barked the latter two sentences as Roger shuddered at the possibility.
"P-P-P-Please, sir! I don't wanna end up on somebody's plate! I won't let ya down!", Roger whimpered as the snooty manager went back to his poise demeanor.
"That's a good lad.", the manager said gently and spots two guests at a table.
"Heavens! Your public awaits!", he advised Roger as the rabbit straightened his bowtie of his waiter suit and skipped on with a paper and pen. Cedric shuddered at the possibilities of Roger messing up his beloved restaurant.
"Waiter! Excuse me! Waiter!", a snooty woman of middle-age called out as she and her husband. Roger then skipped over hopping onto the table much to the couple's irritation.
"Roger Rabbit at your service. How may I start you off with?", Roger asked only for the lady to grit her teeth.
"Do you mind?! Get off the table! I don't know where your feet had been!", she snapped.
"Yes. Were you raised in a barn?!", the man added In as Roger smiled goofily.
"Oh no. I'm actually—"
"Just give us some soup to start us off! And get Off the table!", the lady said grabbing Roger by the ears much to the rabbit's dismay.
"P-P-Please! Not the ears! NOT THE EARS!", Roger yelled much to the other customers' annoyance. Cedric came over real quick to settle the situation.
"Good heavens! What is going on here?!", the manager asked exasperated as the woman's husband explained.
"Apparently, this simpleton stood on our table with his wretched feet! So unsanitary and upsetting my wife!", the man finished as Cedric glared at Roger who was rubbing his ears from where the woman yanked standing back on the floor.
"Roger! How many times do I have to tell you never to stand on the table?!", he hissed as Roger gulped nervously.
"So many times when I was cleanin' tables?", the rabbit grinned but Cedric wasn't buying it.
"Then why did you just—Forget it. Just tend to the customers or you'll be one sorry rabbit!", he warned sternly as Roger skipped on to the kitchen.
"Don't worry, sir! I'm On it!", Roger said but bumped into a chair with an unfortunate individual having sauce splattered On his clothes.
"Sorry about your clothes, sir! Now to tend the customer.", Roger said to himself as the man frowned at his suit ruined. The rabbit went to the back of the restaurant to meet with the chef. The chef was humming a tune making a culinary masterpiece.
"Ah. So magnifico. Bella!", the man said in an Italian accent as he was soon startled by Roger entering opening the door hard.
"Mamma Mia! Who dares interrupt my current masterpiece! Oh it's you, rabbit. What is it you want, eh?", the chef asked in annoyance as Roger grinned.
"Oh nothin'. Just two soups for a lovely couple out there. Would ya help a rabbit out?", Roger asked as the chef nodded.
"Okay, rabbit. Un minutza. And don't touch anything!", the chef warned sternly as Roger assured him.
"No worries. I'm patient. Do your magic.", Roger said as the chef went to the section for the soups. However, Roger grew curious as he spotted all the wares and many dishes for the customers. The rabbit was in awe of it all as he whistled.
"Jeepers, Vito sure knows how to make good eats around here. Say, what's that crab doing in that trap?", Roger wondered as he spotted a familiar crab in a trap.
"Hey, you with the Long ears, mon! Get me outta here! I'm in a worse of fate!", the crab with a Caribbean accent begged to Roger. The rabbit shook his head for a moment.
"Sorry, pal. Vito told me not to touch anything in here. I'll be hossenfeffer if anything goes wrong.", Roger said only for the crab to frown.
"C'mon, mon! I'm an Old crab that should be somewhere sipping tuna colada and play coral golf. Not end up on de plate!", he begged as Roger grinned.
"Oh ok. I'll bust ya outta there. But we gotta hurry before old Vito gets back.", Roger warned as he went to the crab trap and undid the locks and carefully released the crab from his prison. The crab jumped for joy as he thanked Roger.
"Sha-ha-la, mon! I thought for certain I was gonna have to kiss dee grill!", the Caribbean crab said before leaving somewhere else. Roger soon heard Vito's voice.
"Rabbit! I have the soups ready! They're on the trays!", he called as Roger gasped.
"Jeepers! I better head back before he kills me!", he rushed over and skipped casually towards Vito.
"Why thank you, kind Vito. Just what I needed! Oh how wonderful—"
"You didn't mess with anything in here after I've told you not to, did you?", Vito asked with a raised eyebrow. Roger grinned sheepishly but shook It off.
"No. Of course not. Why would I ruin such a culinary masterpiece?", Roger humorously answered as Vito shrugged.
"Good. And by the way, would you deliver this order of pasta carbonara to the lovely senora while you're at it? Her name's Senora Crupnik. Over by the waterfall section.", he asked as Roger nodded.
"You can count on me, sir. I'll take it to the lovely lady.", Roger said as he wheeled the cart of orders out the Kitchen. Vito sighed to himself groaning.
"Now where was I? Oh yes. It's a beautiful night, It's a Bella Notte.", he sung his tune unaware that an empty crab trap was unlocked.
"Okay, where's the lovely lady? Oh yes. The waterfall.", Roger said remembering Vito's instructions as he wheeled the cart hearing his other clients yelling out to him.
"Where's our soup?! Where's that blasted rabbit?!", the lady screeched as the man tried to calm her down.
"Come now, dear. We'll get to the bottom of this.", the man said as Roger hearing them gulped.
"I better hurry! Okay, now to find the Crupnik individual.", Roger thought until he spotted a redheaded lady looking gorgeous with formalwear showing off her cleavage wearing some glasses reading a book about law. Roger's eyes went out his sockets awe unaware that a nearby customer felt disgusted.
"Whoa! Who's the lovely lady? She must be the Crupnik lady Vito mentioned. Better get Over there and give her that pasta.", Roger said as he went over to the woman's table. Once he got there, the woman looked at the rabbit and her order. The rabbit had a genuine smile on his face as he asked her.
"Are you Ms. Crupnik?", Roger asked as the lady nodded.
"Yes I am. And I take it you have my order.", she said politely as Roger happily handed her the order. The rabbit then realized something as he spoke.
"Now I remember, you're the lawyer on the commercial of Jessica V. Crupnik, Attorney At Law. What an honor.", Roger impressed told the ginger as she was amused.
"You are correct on that. You seem to be a Lot more lively than the other people around here.", she said honestly.
"Yep. Most of them can be deadpanned sourpusses. See?", Roger pointed to Droopy who was giving the customers their order.
"Here's your order, sir. Have a good day, sir.", the dog said in a monotone voice. Jessica giggled as Roger smiled.
"I see what you mean here. Is it your first time here?", she asked as Roger hopped onto the opposite end of Jessica's table.
"I've been cleanin' up here and being a waiter is my first time now. This place needs some humor. I mean, it's like a wake in here.", Roger joked with Jessica giggling. However, Cedric grabbed Roger by the ears yanking him off the table much to Jessica's disgust at the manager.
"Hey! P-P-P-Please! Not my ears again! Owwww! Come on, Cedric!", Roger yelled as Cedric glared.
"This is no time for women!", he hissed as he sheepishly grinned at Jessica.
"I apologize for my employee's behavior. It'll never happen again.", he chuckled as Jessica rolled her eyes not buying it.
"And as for you! Go get another bowl of soups for the customers you left behind! Or I'll-I'll—", he looked around at the customers giving him stares. Droopy looked at the scene and sighed.
"Steamed isn't he?", the monotoned dog added his two cents watching Cedric's face turn red but held his composure. But he pointed to the kitchen with a stern expression..
"Just get in there and get the new soup. And discard the one in the tray!", Cedric hissed as Roger grinned.
"Don't worry, boss! I'm On It! I'm on it!", Roger said rolling the cart away nearly running into a table much to the customer's annoyance.
"Watch where you're going, you charlatan!", he yelled Out as Roger didn't pay attention. Cedric turned to Jessica with a warm smile trying to defuse the situation.
"Is there anything I can do, madame? Any wine or something of the like?", he said Only to get shot down.
"That will not be necessary, thank you.", Jessica said politely but firm but Cedric kept pestering her only to get met with a stare that would make Batman proud. The waiter nervously scurried away as Jessica deep down didn't like how Roger was getting treated.
Back in the kitchen, Vito was looking worried with Roger slipping into the kitchen crashing into a bag of flour spilling some in the Process. Vito gasped and looked at Roger with a mixture of annoyance and agitation.
"Watch where you're going, rabbit! You're ruining my concentration!", he hissed working on a sea bass dish. Roger smiled nervously shaking off the flour with Vito frowning.
"And for goodness sake, watch where you're shaking! Anyway, what are you doing back here?", he asked as Roger grinned.
"I need another two bowls Of soup.", Roger confessed. Vito raised an eyebrow in confusion.
"Why do you need another two? There's the same bowls you have in the cart."
"Cedric wanted me to. I took too long due to talking to the gorgeous dame-at-law.", Roger explained. Vito rolled his eyes and sighed.
"Fine. But don't get sidetracked like that again.", Vito said as he went to get some soup. Once he got the soups, he noticed an empty crab cage and narrowed his eyes. He mumbled something in Italian before he went to Roger.
"Here's your soups. I have a question for you. Have you seen a crab anywhere?", the chef asked him eyeing the rabbit suspiciously. Roger shook his had lying to the chef.
"Ummm. Of course not. Why?", Roger answered as Bito frowned.
"I was going to make a succulent dish with it. But somebody snuck in and set it free! If I find out who did It, they'll be something to pay!", the chef hissed in a sinister manner much to Roger feeling uncomfortable. Roger imagined himself on the plate or a gravestone with his name on it. The chef looked at him strangely.
"What's-a mattah you, huh? You look like you saw a ghost or something. You didn't have anything to do with this, did you?", he asked getting dangerously close to Roger. The rabbit chattered his teeth.
"Of course not. I didn't do it. I swear.", Roger said hoping Vito will buy it.
"Oh I believe you, rabbit. But my temper don't!", he yelled in rage steaming like a bull. He continued on as Roger got grabbed by the ears.
"P-P-P-Please! Hey! Put me down!", Roger begged.
"I knew you were the one who let out the crab! My culinary ideas gone to waste!", he cried in tears as Roger fell on his tail. Roger then patted him on the back.
"Relax, Vito. You'll find your new masterpiece. I know it.", Roger assured the man but he was soon met with Vito's smiling maniacal face.
"Oh I found my masterpiece. And it's YOU!", he said trying to capture Roger. Roger jumped out the way gulping nervously.
"Hey, pal! You don't wanna cook me! I'm all tough and gamy! P-P-P-Please don't cook me! My mother loves me!", Roger whimpered as Vito laughed like a madman.
"That's It. I'm outta here!", Roger ran with the cart out the door with a crazed man on his tail with forks and knives.
"Get back here, pazzo congillo!", the man yelled zipping past a plump goose squawking looking drunk wearing a hat escaping. Roger was screaming causing a wild goose chase with Vito chasing both Roger and that goose.
"AAAAAAAHHH! Get this crazy man away from me!", Roger yelled as the goose hiccuped.
"Whoopee! Whoopee! -HIC-", he said flying erratically as the customers were alarmed. The rabbit hopped onto one table to the next as the soup flew Out the cart landing on Cedric drenching him with the hot liquid.
"YEEEEEEEOWWWW!", he yelled in pain hitting his head onto the ceiling landing On the floor. A Lump on his head grew and was furious eyeing Roger wreaking havoc smashing plates and making a mess On some of the customers along with the goose and Vito.
"Roger!", he yelled chasing after the rabbit. Roger yelled screaming rolling into the wine area knocking into the bottles like bowling pins as the beverage spilled onto a couple's table with the woman screaming. The three women at another table screamed as the goose with the hat flew and landed onto their table. The ladies had their table called the Tremaine party. The woman being Lady Tremaine sneered at the commotion and ushered her daughters.
"come along, girls! We're out of here! The service is atrocious!", she said in agitation as Anastasia bawled over her dress ruined while Drizela angrily threw a fit.
"Somebody get this bird off our table!", she ranted as the goose shouted in a drunken state.
"Roger! That's the last straw! You're FIRED! You're FIRED! You're FIRED!", Cedric angrily yelled chasing the rabbit. Roger gulped while wrecking the restaurant.
"Can this day get any worse I gotta think of something before it's too late. YAAAAAHH!", Roger screamed as Vito grabbed him by the ears.
"Now I got you, rabbit! You'll pay for making my culinary work go to waste!", Vito growled as Roger struggled to break free.
"P-P-P-Please! You're not really going to cook me are ya? Gimme a break! I don't wanna be anyone's dinner!", the rabbit gulped as Cedric spotted his lovely restaurant in shambles. The table's were knocked down, wine bottles were spilled over, food all over the place, the décor was stained and messed up and of course most of the customers were mad looking drenched pointing the finger at the manager.
"My restaurant! My beautiful restaurant! Roger, you're going to end up on the menu if it's the last thing I do!", the manager said laughing maniacally ready to tag team with Vito by turning the rabbit into an entrée. However, Roger shook his head narrowing his eyes.
"Not this rabbit, chump! I'm Outta here!", Roger said punching Vito square in the eye making him cry Out in pain. Cedric growled by chasing the rabbit all over the restaurant as the crowd looked On at the crazy sceeene.
Cedric and Roger made the restaurant look even worse during the chase as the manager tried to whack the rabbit with a mallet with murderous intent. Roger gulped with a sheepish grin as Cedric narrowed with fury.
"You're deadmeat now, rabbit!", he yelled as he tried to capture Roger but missed him. The rabbit twirled his ears like a propeller flying upwards to the chandelier pulling out a saw.
"I hope I can get the drop on those two down there!", Roger said as he used the saw to cut the line from the chandelier. Cedric and Vito were grumbling until Vito heard the saw grinding.
"Cedric, did you hear that? Somebody's using a saw!", the chef said worried as Cedric took a listen.
"Yes I do—Wait a minute! That crazed rabbit is messing up a fine Piece of chandelier! Roger, don't!", he yelled as Roger didn't listen and kept On sawing the last bit of line before the chandelier fell off from it's original spot.
"That ouughta fix them. Now to get Jessica outta here and fast!", Roger said as he zipped over to rescue Jessica who was already at the door unsatisfied with the service. Cedric and Vito yelled furiously at the rabbit ready to do him in but the shadow grew bigger.
"Can this night get any worse?", Cedric whined as the chandelier crashed into the two men with the glass shattering everywhere. Cedric and Vito pulled themselves out of the rubble waving a white flag in defeat laughing stupidly as the ending card displays on screen.
"And cut, everyone! That's a wrap! Somebody clean up the set! It looks like a tornado just came in here!", Raul called out to the staff who did as they were told. Cedric and Vito wobbled holding their heads while Roger and Jessica were embracing each other.
"Love Cups, you look amazing as a lawyer! Maybe someday, Disney will give you your new television show.", Roger said honestly as Jessica chuckled.
"I do look like an attorney. But maybe I would ask Mickey about considering a television series for me. Or even us. Can't leave out my Honey Bunny. Now could I?", she said kissing Roger affectionately.
"I know just the name of your potential show! Jessica Rabbit: Ace Attorney!", Roger said but Baby Herman smoking a cigar shook his head.
"You might want to drop the Ace Attorney moniker. That wouldn't be a good look!", the gruff baby advised as Jessica crossed her arms.
"And why not?"
"Some guys Wreck-It-Ralph and Fix-It Felix told me about already own the rights to that name. Capcom might be It or something. Can't you just say Attorney at Law? Now that's lawyer friendly.", Herman huffed as Roger and Jessica now understood why. After all, Disney has a good working relationship with Capcom due to their superhero pals at Marvel working with them and of course Mickey and the gang as well.
"Jessica Rabbit, Attorney At Law! Nice ring to it if I say so myself.", Roger chirped with Jessica and Herman agreeing to the matter. The show ends off with some of the characters getting into their antics.
A/N: And that's short 4 and the 1st of 4 canceled shorts done justice. Now to do the next One dubbed, Beach Blanket Baby. Now Vito and Cedric are my other OCs added into Roger's rogues gallery along with Duke Fox and Disney's Fidget. I picture Jim Cummings voicing Vito and Jeff Bennett with Cedric. As for the Italian words Vito spoke, I'll translate them.
====Vito's Italian Words=====
Magnifico: Magnificent
Fantastico: Fantastic
Un Minutza: One minute or in a minute
Pazzo: crazy
Congillo: rabbit
Now I used Google translator for some of the words but for those who are good at Italiano, feel free to correct me on those phrases here. The Disney cameos here are Sebastian from the Little Mermaid and Uncle Waldo the goose from another favorite Disney movie, The Aristocats. He was that goose that got basted—I mean marinated in the film and escaped.
As for the idea of Jessica Rabbit as an attorney, it crossed my mind and In fact, I may do a spinoff involving her as an attorney similar to Harvey Birdman: Attorney At Law as she works on cases of Disney characters and outside Of Disney. PM me if you wish to collab on the idea of a spinoff of Roger Rabbit's Wacky Toons.
As always, LilMancub out and I'll see y'all in the next one.