"Just what did you think you were doing?" Tenten snarled, her hands on her hips, hair buns quivering in rage. Also quivering because Lee knew that she'd stashed some senbons somewhere in there, and was seconds away from plucking them out of her hair and impaling him with them.

Neji's pale eyes were cold, cold, and colder. "Explain. Now." His right index finger twitched in a way that suggested that Lee would suffer if he didn't get answers fast.

Lee couldn't believe this. First, they ditched him, then second, they acted like it was all somehow his fault. Well, Rock Lee, Konoha's Youthful Wild Green Beast, just wouldn't stand for this. He was known for his patience, sweetness, kindness, and otherwordly amounts of endurance, but if his teammates were being unyouthful, then they were being unyouthful, and Lee had to step up and save Neji and Tenten from such a horrific fate, even if they tore him from limb to limb.

"Neji, Tenten, you two are a DISGRACE to HOT-BLOODEDNESS!" he yelled, pointing his finger accusingly at his two teammates. "After all these years together...I expected...but no..."

Neji and Tenten stared at him blankly, then stared at each other blankly, then went right back to staring at Lee. Several long seconds passed, crickets chirped, and a gust of wind blew past them. Their indignation at being spied on was fast melting away into utter bewilderment.

"Um...what?" Tenten finally asked.

"Don't 'what' me! Think of what Guy-sensei would say!" Lee snapped. "You know perfectly well what I mean, Tenten!"

"Uh...no, I don't."

Neji just continued staring blankly at Lee, like he was insane or something.

"Neji, don't think you're off the hook either!"

"Lee, what are you talking about?" Neji asked, after several moments of further bemusement.

"You two skipped our training this morning!"

Oh, right. Neji discreetly checked his left collarbone to make sure that...ahem...was covered. To his relief, the white fabric of his kimono did shield it from view. Lee did not notice that Neji was doing this, and Neji hoped that Lee would always remain so oblivious.

Tenten shifted her weight from one foot to another, a telltale sign of guilt. "Ah...sorry, Lee. It was an accident. I promise it won't happen again."

"You mean, 'we promise it won't happen again,'" Lee corrected. "And then you would still be breaking your promise, you know that? You skipped our afternoon training too!"

"I apologize, Lee. We were simply preoccupied..." Neji began placatingly, but Lee was in no mood to be placated. It was strange that a youthful maniac such as Lee, who had withstood with grace and aplomb countless jibes at his lack of ninjutsu and genjutsu, at his supposedly ridiculous dream of becoming a splendid ninja anyway, at his hideous choice of attire, would be set off by something so seemingly trivial.

"PREOCCUPIED!" bellowed Lee. His teammates jumped in shock. "Is our training so unimportant that you could be so easily preoccupied?" To Neji and Tenten's horror, tears sparkled in their youthfully enraged teammate's eyes.

They exchanged stricken looks and rushed to Lee's side at once.

"Now, now, Lee, just calm down," Tenten said, patting him on his shiny black bowl cut as he buried his face into her chest and sobbed uncontrollably. "Really, we are sorry. We love training with you, and there's nothing else like it in the world."

"Deep, calm breaths, Lee. Tenten's right. You can't be replaced," said Neji, as Lee unlatched himself from Tenten and began crying into Neji's chest.

Tenten reached out and rubbed soothing circles on Lee's back, and Neji subtly sent little pulses of chakra into Lee's body to calm him down. Their eyes met over the top of Lee's bowl cut. They did not understand. Why did Guy-sensei and Lee do this crying-and-hugging act on a bi-weekly basis? It was gross. However, Neji just shook his head and wordlessly gestured at their poor teammate, and a wave of guilt washed over both of them once more. They doubled their ministrations, which did the trick. After a few more rounds of sobbing, Lee removed his face from Neji's midsection, his cries fading to sniffles.

"So...so then why is it that when I watched you just now, you were having secret training without telling me?" Lee asked, rubbing his watery eyes. "Teammates should never keep secrets. Especially about secret training."

And Neji and Tenten were back to square one: staring at each other blankly.

"Secret...training?" Neji asked tentatively. "What...what do you mean by that, Lee?"

"Hanging out in the bushes together," Lee explained, oblivious to Neji's complexion rapidly paling to a shade similar to that of paper. "You and Tenten, I couldn't understand what was happening."

Tenten turned green as she finally caught on.

"Why were you biting Neji's neck, Tenten?" Lee asked. "I know it's a special kind of training. Was it to improve Neji's pain endurance?"

Neji's face was as blotchy as the mark on his neck. He somehow couldn't bring himself to meet Tenten's eyes, not least because he wouldn't describe it as painful, ever.

"I, uh, Lee...I wasn't biting his – "

"I hope it worked!" Lee yelled, obliviously on a roll. "But I'm so very upset, Tenten, that you didn't include me in your pain endurance training. You should have told me, and we could have all had some youthful training together. You know, like teammates!"

Tenten's jaw was hanging open in disbelief. She turned to Neji.

"Is...is this really happening?" she muttered. "He's asking us to have a threesome with him."

"Looks like it," Neji whispered back. "And I don't think Lee knows what threesomes are."

"Tenten, Neji, if our training is nothing like anything else in the world, then help me improve my pain endurance. Take turns and bite me on the neck with everything you've got. If I cry out or moan like Neji did with you – "

It was Neji's turn to go slack-jawed in disbelief.

"– then I'll do a hundred laps around Konoha on my hands!"

Neji and Tenten's eyes met once more over the top of Lee's bowl cut. It was a look of black, black despair.

They did not understand. What was wrong with their team?

A/N: Written for Day 11: Youth...or rather, Unyouthfulness. :)

Had so much fun writing this crack/humor one-shot. I just feel like Neji and Tenten would be the mom friends of Team Guy. :) As always, thanks for the reviews, and please keep reviewing! :)