A/N: I've been quite the lazy bum as of late, writing almost nothing whatsoever -- and the stuff I have been picking at in my off time is the makings of yet-to-be-posted stories, nothing that would at all benifit my readers. An update is nowhere to be found in my gazillions of document files. If these aren't suitable qualifications for an "on hiatus writer", I don't know what would be. To those impeccably patient who are still waiting in vain hope for an update, I apologize deeply.

Hello! I am someone you would most likely not want to meet in a dark alleyway late at night. I have this unexplicable passion for writing, so I post any stories I deem worthy enough here for your more pleasing passage of time.

I am an 18-year-old whack-job who should not be allowed near caffeine in any form. Some things I like to do in my spare time are read, write, roll down grassy hills, ride roller coasters, listen to music, eat popsicles, shop, make ridiculous faces (and noises to accompany), play the double bass, annoy people, watch movies, make my mother laugh, and bite my fingernails. Due to brainwashing originated by my parents from a very early age, I am a deep lover of all things sci-fi and other-worldly, which may account for some very strange behavior on my part. I do not apologize.

If there is anything else you would like to know about me, just e-mail me and I will be happy to add you onto my list of stalkers. Also, if you have an issue with one of my stories, reviews, something I've said, or are just plain bored, feel free to pop me a PM.

Awesome quotes that must be shared:

"Too much sanity may be madness, and the maddest of all is to see the world as it is and not as it should be." -Don Quixote

"Guessing is a weakness brought on by indolence and should never be confused with intuition." -Sherlock Holmes, 'The Beekeeper's Apprentice'

"Boy, I feel a lot safer now that she Martha Stewart is behind bars. O.J. Simpson and Kobe Bryant are still walking around; Osama Bin Laden, too. But they take the only woman in America willling to cook, clean, and work in the yard and haul her ass off to jail?" -George Carlin

"I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members." -Groucho Marx (I felt this one applied to me all too well.)

"Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes." -Oscar Wilde

"I create feelings in others they themselves don't understand. " -Lightning McQueen, 'Cars'

"Seven days without laughter makes one weak." -Unknown

"Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others." -Groucho Marx

"Conserve water. Drink more root beer." -a brilliant bumper sticker

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.