October 31st 1981
Lily awoke to the familiar sound of her son crying. Next to her, her husband slept soundly- the blankets pulled up nearly covering his face leaving only his black hair exposed. For a moment she considered waking him so that he could tend to the baby while she stayed cocooned in their warm bed, but the thought soon passed.
"Time to get out of bed."
With that the red-haired witch hauled herself up and climbed out of bed, regretting her decision to let her husband sleep as soon as her feet touched the cold wooden floor.
It was still dark out, but she knew the sun would be coming up in just a few short hours.
"Mummy and Daddy love you so much, sweetie." Lily cooed as she picked her son. Almost immediately the child stopped crying as she paced around the room, gently bouncing the boy in her arms.
As she drifted across the room, she couldn't help but stop and stare out of the window for a moment. Nights like this, when all was calm and quiet, and the entire world seemed to stand still always reminded her of that night back in September of 1976 when she made that fateful trip across the castle.
Her mind often drifted back to that time; before she knew just how terrible the war raging outside the castle walls truly was. Before she knew the pain of seeing those you love die, and the unfillable emptiness their loss left behind.
"It is war, Lily, war. There are real evils, real risks, real consequences…real lives at stake!"
The "Great Wizarding War" -as the Daily Prophet called it- was raging on, but there was an end in sight- Lord Voldemort would soon be defeated. Or at least that is what Professor Dumbledore claimed.
She wondered exactly what was in those glass vials Professor Snape gave to her that night. She had been so tempted to peek into the pensive, to see what the future held.
She had so many questions.
What exactly did Severus see when he looked in the pensive that caused such a visceral reaction? He had looked at her with such a haunted expression- the same one she saw on the men at the veterans hall as a child. What made him pledge his allegiance to defeating the man he once worshiped? And what about the memories given to Dumbledore? Were they so valuable that they would change the course of history?
Severus said they were.
Maybe it's best that I don't know.
As she bounced her child on her hip her mind continued to wander.
Maybe not everything had changed.
One year earlier Severus was hired on at Hogwarts. Officially he was hired to replace Professor Slughorn as the potions master and head of Slytherin House, who after forty years of service was finally retiring. Unofficially Professor Dumbledore hired him to keep Severus as close as possible without rising any suspicion; it provided a solid reason for them to spend as much time as they did cloistered away in the headmaster's office.
Lily wasn't entirely sure what Professor Snape did in his work with Dumbledore. Severus kept his cards close to his chest- for her safety as well as his own, and as a rule the old wizard only revealed his hand when necessary. If she had to guess she would say his work was as some sort of liaison to deflectors- Death Eaters who found themselves in too deep and were desperately searching for a way out. That is, a way out that did not end in death.
Perhaps that was the job Professor Snape had hinted at all those years ago on that night that, for him, had yet to happen.
"… being a professor is my profession not my job. It is through my profession that I am able to do my job. It is nothing more than…. a means to an end."
Whatever he did, his work was invaluable to the Order.
The thought reminded her of Regulus Black, a Death Eater turned spy whose sacrifice brought the Order their second horcrux- a locket containing one of six pieces of Lord Voldemort's soul. Regulus had played his part so well that even his own brother, Sirius, had no idea that he was a double agent. His dying wish was to see Lord Voldemort defeated, as a mortal man.
He was only 19.
His sacrifice, nor those of countless others would be forgotten. Lord Voldemort would soon be defeated, and future generations of witches and wizards would know only peace. The wizarding world would be a better place for her son, a kinder, safer place than the one she had grown up it.
It was with that thought she noticed that the baby had fallen asleep once again. She placed the child back into his crib and watched over him long enough to be sure he wouldn't begin fussing again. Once she was satisfied, she slipped out of the room.
Returning to her own bed she was distracted from the thought of horcruxes and Death Eaters by the distant chimes of the old clock that stood in the corner of the living room downstairs. It rang twelve times, signaling that the tenth month had gone and the eleventh had come to take its place.
Lily slipped under the covers and tried, unsuccessfully, not to disturb her husband.
" 's everything okay?" he mumbled, nestling closer to her.
"Just checking on the baby, we're all safe and sound." She whispered.
And it was true. There in their little home in the early hours of that November morning the three of them were, for the time being, safe and sound. There was of course, no way of knowing what the morning would bring- they were after all, at war.
In a few hours she and her husband would both rise, she would kiss him goodbye, he would promise to be home for dinner- something they both knew he could not guarantee, and he would leave to meet with Professor Dumbledore. She would have very little time to dwell on his absence though, while she was no longer a fighter she too had work to do. Lily would bide her time ferrying communication from one member of the order to another and decoding intel given to them from spies.
But for now, tucked into bed with the love of her life, their son peacefully sleeping in the next room, all was well.
AN: Hello! If you are reading this I wanted to thank you for making it to the end of this story. I began this piece when I was 15 and over the years I forgot that I had ever even written it. Upon rediscovering it I felt like I needed to give it a proper ending.
I've intentionally left the identity of Lily's husband a bit vague… is it James or Severus under that black hair in her bed? I guess only Lily will know for sure.