Tuesday, September 6, 1977
"Remus, are you ready for patrols?" Lily had already put her books away and filled her pockets with emergency snacks, and now stood beside Remus's chair waiting for him to join her.
"Yeah, I'm coming." Remus slipped a bookmark between the pages of his novel and set it on the table next to his armchair. "Don't let anyone mess with my book, all right?" he said, standing and stretching. "But Padfoot, that's not an excuse to shout at first years."
Sirius glanced at Remus and cleared his throat. "Noodle," he muttered.
Lily frowned in confusion. "What was that?"
Sirius ignored her and fixed Remus with a meaningful stare.
"Moony, noodle," he repeated, drawing out the words to emphasize his meaning.
Remus glared back at Sirius. "Sod off, Padfoot, I'm just going to do patrols because it's my night to do it."
He turned to leave, but Mary jumped out of her seat and grabbed his shoulder. "Wait, Remus, maybe you should stay and rest, because you look really tired, and didn't you say you were feeling ill earlier?" She leaned in and whispered, "Noodle," then looked from Lily to James before widening her eyes at Remus and dragging him back to his armchair.
James turned to Remus and raised his eyebrows. "What's going on? Do you need me to cover your duty tonight?" He ran a hand through his hair and frowned. "What day is it?"
Remus sighed. "It's Tuesday, Prongs."
"No, that's not what I - oh, never mind," James said, shaking his head and getting to his feet. "I've got it. Evans, sorry to say you're stuck with me again."
"No, really, you don't have to-" Remus began, but James was already heading for the portrait hole.
"Don't have too much fun without us," he called over his shoulder, giving them a wave before ushering Lily through the portrait hole and climbing through after her.
Once James and Lily had left the common room Sirius turned to Remus, an indignant expression on his face.
"Moony, what part of 'noodle' did you not understand?" he demanded. "You made me look like a real prat!"
Remus laughed and opened his book. "Well, whose fault is that for deciding 'noodle' was a good code word?"
"It's a fine code word if the person responding to it reacts appropriately instead of pretending they have no idea what's going on," Sirius insisted. "What a load of rubbish! 'I'm going to do patrols because it's my night to do it.' You have the opportunity to skive off patrols and help Prongs and Evans get together, so I don't understand what the problem is." He waited for a response, but Remus turned a page in his book and did not look up or acknowledge that he had heard. "Moony, are you even listening to me?" Sirius snatched the book out of his friend's hand and cast around for an adequate hiding place before placing it on the seat of his armchair and sitting on top of it. "You made Macdonald look a bit foolish, too."
She shrugged. "I think I managed to be a bit more subtle than you were, so no harm done."
"And you would've made Wormtail look foolish if he had actually been doing what he was supposed to be doing," Sirius insisted, glaring at Peter.
"Well, I reckon it would have sounded really bloody stupid if three of us were shouting 'noodle' at the same time," Peter said with a shrug. "I thought you two had it sorted."
Remus sighed and met Sirius's gaze, an expression of resigned exasperation on his features. "Padfoot, you know I don't like missing patrols if I can help it. It's bad enough missing the ones I actually need to. Skipping them for absolutely no reason doesn't sit well with me."
On the occasions when his prefect duties fell too close to full moon and he was forced to
find someone else to cover his patrols, he always imagined the other prefects whispering or casting snide glances at him behind his back, speculating that he was simply feigning illness to get out of fulfilling his responsibilities.
Sirius rolled his eyes. "It's not absolutely no reason, it's for Prongs. It's a necessary sacrifice for a good cause, if you want to look at it that way. They could be snogging as we speak, and all because you graciously offered up your prefect duties."
"Now you're taking the piss," Remus said, slouching down in his seat and stretching his legs out in front of him.
"I would never!" Sirius said in a tone of mock outrage, causing Peter to snort with laughter. "Pete, what's so funny?"
"You literally decided yesterday was 'Mock Moony Monday' and spent the entire evening wearing one of his jumpers, eating chocolate and paging through a book while you said things like, 'No smoking in the dormitory!' or 'I'd rather read a Transfiguration book than swim in a pool because I'm Moony!' and occasionally pretending to doze off," Peter replied, still laughing. "But you're right, you would never mock him."
"That was done out of love," Sirius insisted. "And I did stop eventually."
"Only because Lily threatened to hex you," Mary said. "But I suppose I'm the one you should be annoyed at, Remus, seeing as I said the bit about you not feeling well. That's what got James's attention."
"That's all right," he said, resting his head in his hand. "I just don't want to, I dunno, take advantage. I don't like using being sick as an excuse to get out of things."
His mind drifted to the countless classes he had spent forcing his eyes to stay open or fighting the urge to vomit or struggling to focus on the lesson instead of his blinding headache because he simply could not stand the thought of missing yet another class. His friends apparently had the same thought, because they all shot him incredulous glares, and Mary laughed.
"You don't do that, Moony," Peter said. "Nobody thinks you do."
"And if anyone ever does suggest anything like that, we just hex them," Sirius added.
"I, on the other hand, am not above telling Flitwick I'm having 'lady problems' so I can get out of class and meet up with this one in a broom cupboard," Mary said, jerking her head in Sirius's direction.
"I'd forgotten about that!" Sirius said. "See, Macdonald, that's why we get along so well."
"Because there's no limit to how low we'll both stoop to get away with things?" she asked.
He nodded. "Exactly. Well, that and we both just really like shagging." He turned to Remus. "Anyway, cheer up. There's no point being grumpy about it now because they're already out patrolling." He shifted in his seat and pulled out Remus's book. "Here, you can have your book back, and I won't throw anything at you for the entire night."
Remus raised his eyebrows and Sirius grinned. "All right," Sirius amended, "but for at least the first half hour you can enjoy uninterrupted reading. After that, I might get bored and resort to chucking things in your general direction. But," he said, holding up a hand, "I do it out of love."
Remus rolled his eyes and flipped through his book to find his page. "You must really love me, then," he said, settling back into his chair to read. The sound of his friends' chatter washed over him, giving him a safe, cozy feeling as he lost himself in his book. He didn't even mind much when Sirius threw a pillow at him not even twenty minutes later, but simply picked it up and tossed it back without looking up from his book.
"You're an idiot," he muttered.
"But I'm a loveable idiot," Sirius replied before lobbing the pillow in Mary's direction.
Remus did not reply, but smiled to himself as he turned a page, because Sirius's assessment could not have been more accurate. I love these idiots, he thought. I love this bunch of ridiculous, obnoxious, reckless, hopeless, loveable idiots.
Wednesday, September 7, 1977
"I can't believe we all have a free period together," Sirius said. He lay on the floor with his legs resting on the seat of his armchair and his jacket stuffed under his head as a makeshift pillow.
"Why are you sitting like that?" Remus asked. He had a textbook propped open on his lap and a half-finished essay spread out on the table next to him, and his forehead was creased with concentration.
"Why aren't you sitting like this?" Sirius retorted.
"I reckon McGonagall fixed it so we have the same free period because she didn't want to deal with us complaining about it like last year," James said. He poured a handful of Bertie Botts into his palm and picked out the green ones for Lily before choosing an orange one for himself. "But I suppose you didn't end up hating your free period, did you, Padfoot?" He glanced over at Sirius and smirked.
"That's true," Lily said, popping one of the Bertie Botts into her mouth. "What are you and Mary going to do without your weekly designated shagging time?"
"I think we'll manage somehow," Mary said. She pushed a curl out of her face and bent closer to her textbook, tracing the words with her finger in search of some elusive piece of information.
"Yeah, it's not like anything's stopping us from shagging," Sirius added, swinging his legs down and pushing himself upright before plucking the book from Mary's grasp and flipping a few pages. "Here," he said, pointing to a paragraph and handing the book back to her.
"Thanks," she said after adding the necessary sentences to her essay and setting it on the table to dry.
"You're welcome," he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her down into the armchair with him. "Now that you're finished, we can do this." He tangled his hand in her hair and leaned in to kiss her.
"Oh, are you snogging right in front of people now?" James asked. "Just really don't give a fuck anymore?"
This comment elicited no response other than the sound of the Bertie Botts spilling onto the floor as Mary adjusted her position and kicked them over.
"You're going to make Moony sit here and watch you grope each other? He hates watching other people snog. Moony?" James turned a questioning gaze on Remus. "You hate watching other people snog."
Remus kept his eyes fixed on his book and shrugged. "It's okay," he said, trying to sound nonchalant but failing to conceal the discomfort on his face. "I don't mind so much anymore."
"Neither do I," Peter added, fiddling with his quill although he hadn't added anything new to his essay for at least five minutes.
"Well, we already knew that, Wormtail," James said, smirking.
Peter turned red and dropped his quill. "I didn't mean it in a weird way!"
"I know, I'm only joking." James laughed, but disgust quickly replaced the mirth as he noticed Sirius unbuttoning Mary's blouse. "Ugh, Merlin, at least leave your clothes on."
"Yeah this is too awkward, I'm leaving," Lily said, gathering up her books. "You want to come to the library?"
"Sure do." James stuffed his things into his bag and scrambled to his feet. "Have fun, you bloody weirdos!" he called over his shoulder before following Lily out of the portrait hole.
"Oi!" Remus called. "You can stop, they're gone." When Sirius and Mary continued snogging and made no indication that they had heard, Remus sighed and heaved himself to his feet, then whacked Sirius on the head with his book.
"Ouch! No need to bloody abuse me," Sirius said, rubbing his head and pulling away from Mary. "Oh, hang on, did it work?" He grinned at Mary. "For a second there I forgot we were doing this for a reason other than the usual one."
Mary pushed her hair back from her face and tugged down her shirt. "Me too," she said, flushed and breathing heavily. "They left, so that must be good, right?"
"They went to the library," Peter replied. "I dunno, they took all their books, so I assumed they were just going to do homework, but I suppose they might be snogging instead?"
Remus returned to his seat and opened his book again. "I highly doubt they're snogging. If anything, they're talking about what a couple of idiots you two are." He shook his head, chuckling. "Merlin, we need a signal for when our stupid bloody plan gets out of hand and we need to stop before they think we've gone completely mad."
"You're right," Sirius said, drumming his fingers against the top of Mary's head as he thought until she slapped his hand away. "How about, 'Fuck jumpers!' Or 'Chocolate is the worst,' or how about, 'Reading is for losers'?"
Remus rolled his eyes. "Padfoot…"
"Oh, wait, hang on, how about 'Ride me like a hippogriff?' Or 'Polish my wand,' or…"
"How about, 'I want to stir your cauldron'?" Peter chimed in.
"Ooh, nice one, Pete," Sirius said. "Or what about-"
"Never mind, clearly this was a stupid idea," Remus said, raising his voice to drown out Sirius's increasingly filthy suggestions. "We don't need any more code words."
Sirius shrugged. "If you say so, although I do rather like 'Ride me like a hippogriff.'" He turned to Mary and raised his eyebrows. "Should we go up to the dormitory, then? I'd say we could stay down here, but I've probably tormented Moony enough for one day."
Thursday, September 8, 1977
"You can sit with Evans if you like," Sirius said, unpacking his Potions materials before sitting down and tipping backwards in his chair. "I'd manage. It would be a long, lonely year, but I suppose I would carry on somehow." He sighed and adopted a forlorn expression.
James rolled his eyes and grinned. "Shut up. I've sat next to you in Potions for the past six years, I'm not changing that now."
As if on cue, Slughorn's voice cut through the chatter. "Before you all get too comfortable, I thought it might be fun this year to mix everyone up a bit, so I'd like you to choose a seat next to someone you haven't sat with before." His expression was jovial as he surveyed the class, and his eyes seemed to linger on James and Lily a moment longer than necessary before moving.
"I've never met this prat before in my life," Sirius said, pointing at James and raising his eyebrows.
"No idea who this weirdo is, but I suppose I can tolerate sitting next to him," James added.
Slughorn chuckled and shook his head. "Nice try, boys."
James shrugged. "Well, it was worth a shot." He caught Lily's eye and grinned. "What do you think, Evans? Can you put up with me sitting with you, or will my irresistible smile and charming sense of humor be too much of a distraction?"
The corners of her lips twitched up into a smile, although James could tell she was trying to fight it. "I suppose you can join me." She shoved her potions materials over to make room for him, then glanced sideways at him and smirked. "Although I'm not sure I'm the one that needs to worry about being distracted. Are you going to be able to focus while I make my, how did you describe it, adorable potion-brewing face?"
As she pushed a piece of hair out of her face James caught a tantalizing whiff of her shampoo, and her arm kept brushing his as she set out her potions ingredients, and bloody hell he was already unable to focus on anything other than the girl sitting mere inches from him and they hadn't even started brewing their potions yet. But of course he couldn't say any of that, so instead he opened his textbook, careful not to bump Lily's arm, and said in a nonchalant tone, "Of course I'll be able to focus. Have a bit of faith in me, Evans."
The dim atmosphere of the dungeon classroom and the idle conversation of his classmates faded away as James watched Lily chop her ingredients, transfixed by her deft, careful motions and the way her tongue poked out the side of her mouth as she concentrated on making her cuts even. The ingredients in front of him lay forgotten, and he only remembered to cut up his dandelion root when Lily glanced over at him and said, "I'd get going with cutting those, because you really need to add them before the potion is boiling." She studied his cauldron and frowned. "Unless you're planning to leave the dandelion root out, which I don't recommend if you enjoy having hair and eyebrows."
"Right," James said, reaching for his knife and trying to force his befuddled brain to attend to the task in front of him rather than fixating on the the way her hair fell into her face and the smooth, freckled skin revealed by her shirt as she leaned over her cauldron. Did she realize the effect she had on him? She had to, because although he made an effort not to grin and stare like an idiot, more often than not she would do something intriguing like laughing or tossing back her hair or applying lip balm, and he would end up watching her with a big goofy smile on his face despite his best intentions.
"Your cauldron's about to boil over," Lily said, keeping her eyes fixed on her own potion as she stirred in the tiny bits of dandelion root.
"Oh, bloody hell." James scrambled to lower the heat and tossed in his own dandelion root, jerking back to avoid the resulting splash as they hit the hot liquid in the cauldron. The sound of Sirius's laughter reached his ears from the seat behind him, but he responded with a rude hand gesture and kept his attention on salvaging his potion. As he stirred he darted quick, furtive glances at Lily, trying to decide if the expression on her face was more impatient or amused.
After five frantic minutes James had regained some semblance of control over his potion, so he let his attention drift back to Lily while he waited for the liquid to change color after simmering for at least ten minutes. The steam from her cauldron had dampened the little tendrils of hair around her temples and caused her shirt to cling to her skin. There was a little crease in her brow as she studied the bubbles rising from her potion, and she emitted a satisfied sigh as she watched the liquid shift from a dark brown to a light tan as the simmer changed to a rolling boil. The pure joy emanating from her was almost tangible, and James found himself imitating the smile on her face as she lowered the heat under her cauldron, still completely engrossed in her work.
"Prongs!" James tore his gaze away from Lily and snapped his head around to face Sirius. "I think you've fucked up your potion again," he said, nodding at the smoke now billowing from James's cauldron.
"Bloody fucking hell," James muttered, stirring with frantic, jerky motions that did little to reduce the acrid fumes that filled the air around them. "Evans, is it too far gone, or can I save it, do you think?"
The sound of her name brought Lily out of her reverie and her eyes widened as she took in the catastrophe unfolding in front of her.
"Merlin, James, did you just completely forget you were brewing a potion?" She leaned closer to examine the contents of his cauldron, wrinkling her nose at the smell. "It's not ideal, but it should still turn out okay if you turn down the heat and keep stirring until it stops smoking. Then you can turn the heat back up and let it simmer until it turns the right color." A frown creased her face as she looked at the dark, gloppy liquid. "Well, until it turns a bit paler, anyway. I don't think there's any hope of it turning the exact shade of tan we're aiming for."
James followed her instructions, breathing a sigh of relief when the smoke abated and the potion began to lighten. "Thanks, Evans." He nodded at her potion and gave her a thumbs up. "Nice work on yours, by the way. I'm glad I didn't distract you too much."
She glanced at his potion, which had turned the exact shade of baby poop. "Wish I could say the same for you," she said, a teasing note in her voice.
He shrugged and ran a hand through his hair. "It's all right. You saved my arse twice, even if you were the reason it needed saving in the first place."
That goofy smile did not let up for the rest of the class, even when Slughorn deemed his potion merely passable, and it stayed with him as he gathered up his things and left the classroom, chatting with Sirius and Lily and laughing about his disastrous potion. The less-than-ideal grade, the stress of only just rescuing the potion from a tragic ending, the pungent smell of burnt potion that clung to his clothing - none of that seemed important, because he got to sit next to Lily and watch her doing what she did best, and rather than being annoyed by his attention, she seemed pleased and flattered by it. I am the luckiest fucker in the entire school. The thought intensified his smile, and he realized how ridiculous he must look, but found he didn't care.
"Do we want to take bets on how many times Evans is going to have to save my potion next class? I think I'm going to go with three…"