Thursday, October 27, 1977
"I can't stand this." Lily stood in front of the fire, too restless to remain in her chair. A book lay abandoned on the table next to a half-finished game of chess. Mary had lent her a copy of Witch Weekly, and she had also tried reading the day's copy of The Daily Prophet, but she had tossed both of them aside in irritation after only a few minutes. "I can't think. I can't relax. I can't concentrate on anything."
"They're fine," Mary said, looking up from her own issue of Witch Weekly. "They've been doing this every month for the past two years. They know what they're doing."
"But things go wrong sometimes," Lily insisted, wringing her hands. "They even said so. You've seen the scars. What if something like that happens again?"
"Technically I've only seen Sirius's scar," Mary said with a smirk. "You're the only one who has seen enough of James to see his."
Lily sighed in irritation and glared at Mary. "Don't try to distract me with suggestive comments. Aren't you worried at all? I don't see how you can just sit there and read Witch Weekly like everything's fine."
"Everything is fine," Mary said.
Lily opened her mouth to protest, so Mary closed her magazine and continued, "Obviously I'm worried. How could I not be? But they're used to this. They know what to expect and how to handle it, and us sitting here worrying all night won't make them any safer, so what's the point?"
"But it's not that easy for me," Lily said, sitting down again and tucking her legs under her. "I can't just shut my brain off like that."
"I'll just have to keep trying to distract you, then," Mary said, rummaging in her bag until she found a bottle of nail polish. "Here, you can paint my nails while you tell me what a useless arsehole Harold Minchum is."
"But you hate my political rants," Lily pointed out, taking the proffered bottle of nail polish and giving it a shake. "You always say you avoid reading The Prophet so it doesn't ruin your day, and when I talk about what's going on I ruin it for you, except you don't even get the benefit of looking smart that you get when you read the newspaper."
Mary grinned and rested her right hand on the arm of Lily's chair. "That's true, but I'll make an exception today in hopes it will help you turn your brain off." She raised her eyebrows and added, "Or if you prefer you can tell me more about the other night when you and James met up in the prefect's bathroom."
Lily blushed and looked around to ensure nobody had heard, then began applying polish to Mary's fingernails. "I can't talk about that now, there are first years in here." She sighed and glanced over at the copy of The Daily Prophet, studying the headline about Minchum's latest initiative. "Fine. Were you listening yesterday when I was talking about his idea to authorize Aurors to use Unforgivable Curses as an interrogation tactic?"
"No, but I'm sure you're going to tell me all about it now," Mary said, resting her left hand on the arm of the chair so Lily could paint the other hand. "I assume you have very strong opinions about this idea."
"Of course I do! Do you realize how immoral that is?" Lily exclaimed, waving her arms around to emphasize her point and splattering the table with little red droplets of nail polish.
"Is it immoral?" Mary asked as she Vanished the spilled nail polish and inspected her nails. "You've missed a finger."
"Oh, sorry," Lily said, reaching for Mary's hand to paint the neglected fingernail. "Obviously it's immoral. You really think they should be allowed to use the bloody Cruciatus on people, even if they are criminals?"
Mary plucked the nail polish from her hand and set it out of reach on the table, smiling, then settled in to listen to Lily's heated tirade against Minchum's policies.
Hours later they had exhausted the topic of politics and had a muttered, giggly discussion about Lily's visit to the prefect's bathroom with James. Lily and Mary both had freshly-painted fingernails and toes, and they were the only people left in the common room besides Seven, who was curled up under a blanket with a book. Unsure what to do next, they both sat cross-legged in front of the fire, staring into the flames.
"Should we just go to bed?" Mary suggested. "It's pointless to try to stay up. They'll be gone ages, and we'll just be useless in the morning." She scraped at a tiny fleck of polish on her cuticle and frowned.
"I won't be able to sleep," Lily said, shaking her head. Her eyes felt heavy and she longed for the cozy warmth of her duvet and the oblivion of sleep, but she knew she would only toss and turn all night, imagining all the horrible things that could be happening at that very moment. "And you won't either. I know you don't sleep well without Sirius."
Mary glanced sideways at her and scowled. "I never said that," she protested. "His bed is more comfortable than mine, that's all."
Lily knew it was fruitless to argue, so she shrugged and continued to stare into the fire. The two girls lapsed into a moody silence for several minutes, each lost in her own thoughts as the fire popped and crackled.
"All right, let's go," Mary said, heaving herself to her feet.
"Where are we going?" Lily asked. She made no move to stand up; the fire was warm, and if she had to be anxious and sleep-deprived, she would prefer to be anxious and sleep-deprived down here rather than up in her dormitory, listening to the soft sounds of Anne and Olivia sleeping while she pictured James injured and unconscious.
"We're going to smoke a joint, and then we're going to sleep in the boys' dormitory," Mary replied.
Lily studied her friend's face, set in that determined, stubborn expression that reminded her of Sirius, and decided there was no point in arguing. Instead, she shrugged and stood up, then followed Mary up the stairs to the boys' dormitory. While Mary Summoned the little zippered pouch that concealed her marijuana stash, Lily threw open the window to let in the brisk night air. They smoked in silence for a minute, both peering out at the dark grounds and wondering where the boys might be at this moment.
"Do you reckon-" Lily began, but Mary held up a hand to silence her.
After a moment, they heard a faint howl, followed by an even fainter bark. They stared at each other, eyes wide with wonder. When the night fell silent again, they both leaned forward and strained to hear more, but the only sound was the faint rustle of tree branches in the wind.
"Is that a good sign, do you think?" Lily asked.
Mary nodded, her face dreamy as she continued to gaze out into the night. "I think so," she said, and her voice had a soft, faraway quality. "I bet they're having the time of their lives."
She fell silent again, taking one last hit from the joint before stubbing it out on the window sill. The marijuana had soothed Lily's frazzled nerves and made her eyes feel even heavier. She was considering standing up to lay down in James's bed when Mary spoke again.
"This summer Black and I got stoned and had this conversation about the best moments of our lives," she said. She wrapped a curl around her finger as she spoke, and her eyes remained locked on the grounds outside the window. "And before you say anything, I know it's sort of a sentimental conversation, but we were stoned off our arses, so it doesn't really count."
"If you say so," Lily said, leaning her back against the wall and letting her eyes close halfway. The breeze stirred her hair and raised goosebumps on her arms, and she longed for the soft blanket that lay on top of James's bed, but the distance felt impossibly far.
"Anyway, he said all he could tell me about one of the memories was that it involved him, James, Remus, and Peter, and some secret that bound them all together. I've just realized that he must've been talking about the full moon." The curl had sprang free from Mary's grasp and she sat there staring at her empty hand as if unsure what to do now.
"He loves these nights," Lily remarked. She imagined him bounding across the grounds, his black shaggy fur shining in the moonlight and his tongue lolling out of his mouth, and a soft laugh escaped her lips.
"He does," Mary agreed, grinning, and Lily knew she must be picturing the same thing. "I bet he's out there running around like a maniac, showing off, the prat." Her face was full of such deep affection that Lily looked away, not wanting to intrude on her friend's feelings.
"I bet they all love it," Lily continued. "Even Remus, as much as he can enjoy anything in that state. It does make me feel a bit better somehow." She thought of the four of them racing along the grounds or dodging trees in the Forbidden Forest, full of adrenaline and bursting with the shared joy of feeling so incredibly alive.
"Me too," Mary said, and with that she tore her gaze away from the grounds and got to her feet, grimacing as she stretched after so much time spent on the hard stone floor. "You ready for bed?"
Lily nodded and stood up before making her way over to James's bed. "Want me to Summon our toothbrushes?"
"No need," Mary said, plopping down onto Sirius's bed and kicking off her shoes. "I, er, keep an extra toothbrush here." Lily smirked and raised her eyebrows, but Mary ignored her and continued, "And you have a toothbrush here as well. Sirius tried to Summon mine but got yours instead, and I never returned it because I thought it'd be a laugh if you couldn't find it and assumed Olivia hid it or something."
"You bitch, I did think Olivia hid it," Lily said, laughing.
After they changed and got ready for bed, Lily turned out the lights and crawled under James's duvet. She nestled into the blankets, breathing in his familiar scent that lingered on his pillow and on the old Ballycastle Bats t-shirt she had borrowed to sleep in. It wasn't the same as having him with her, but somehow being in his bed made her miss him a bit less. The joint had dulled the edges of her worry and she now felt pleasantly stoned and sleepy. Her eyes drifted shut and she almost let the sleep pull her under, but then a thought occurred to her and it was out of her mouth before she even realized what she was saying.
"I'm in love with him," she heard herself say, and her voice sounded foreign and strange. "I haven't told him yet, but I'm in love with him. James, I mean."
Mary laughed and rolled over to face her. "No! I thought you meant Flitwick."
"Oh, sod you," Lily said, feeling strange after speaking the words out loud. They had been rattling around inside her head since her realization the other day, but until this moment it had not quite felt real.
"We all know, by the way," Mary said. "This isn't some big shocking revelation. It's completely obvious to all of us that you're in love with him."
Lily mulled this over, wondering how something could be so apparent to everyone else when it had only just become clear to her. "Just like it's obvious to all of us that you and Sirius are in love with each other," she said, glancing over at Mary and flashing her a sly smile.
Mary opened her mouth to reply, then closed it and grinned. "Goodnight, Lil," she said, rolling over and pulling the covers up to her chin.
"Night," Lily murmured, closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep with the words I'm in love with him still ringing in her ears.
Friday, October 28, 1977
"What are the chances we can skive off Transfiguration without McGonagall murdering us?" Sirius asked as they rounded the corner and came to a stop in front of the portrait hole.
"Gadzooks," Peter said to the Fat Lady, and she swung aside to let them all climb through. "You ask that every month, Padfoot."
Sirius shrugged. "That doesn't answer my question."
"Chances are slim to none," James said. "She's already upset with you for refusing to take your cowboy hat off in the corridor yesterday."
"Well I don't see why it isn't allowed," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "If a hat that brilliant violates dress code, it's time to re-examine the dress code if you ask me."
He drew to a stop in front of their usual cluster of armchairs, but they were empty except for an issue of Witch Weekly resting on the arm of Sirius's usual chair.
"Huh," James said, eying the empty chairs and running a hand through his hair. "I half expected them to wait up all night for us, didn't you?"
He had pictured Lily pacing in front of the fire, her face drawn into a worried frown while Mary tried in vain to reassure her. The thought of finding her fast asleep on the armchair and waking her up with a kiss had buoyed him along on the long trek back up to Gryffindor tower. As much as he hated the idea of her losing sleep and worrying over him, he also loved it, because it showed she cared. Seeing the empty chairs came as a disappointment, although he tried to pretend he didn't care.
"A bit," Sirius admitted. "Oh well. If we hurry we can still get a good hour's worth of sleep."
He headed for the staircase and James and Peter followed, pushing open the door and stumbling into the dormitory. None of them bothered to change, but James at least had the sense to take off his shoes, and as he sat on the edge of the bed to remove them he realized it was already occupied.
"Hi," he murmured as he slid under the covers and kissed Lily's forehead.
At the sound of his voice her eyes fluttered open and her face broke into a smile.
"Hi," she replied in a voice slightly hoarse from sleep. She reached for him, but before he could wrap his arms around her they were interrupted by an indignant shriek.
"Macdonald?" Sirius had collapsed onto his bed only to spring back up, startled by the unexpected cry. "Why're you shouting?"
"Because you sat on me, you prat!" The blankets covered half of her face but she peered out at him, scowling.
"Well I didn't expect you to be in my bed, did I? You could have given me a warning or something."
She laughed and shook her head. "I was asleep, you idiot, how was I supposed to give you a warning?" Her hand emerged from under the blanket to point at James's bed. "I notice James managed to figure out Lily was in his bed without sitting on her."
Sirius raised his eyebrows. "Well if you were expecting me to wake you up by kissing your forehead and whispering sweet nothings, you're with the wrong bloody person."
"I wasn't expecting sweet nothings, but I'd settle for something like, 'Oh, hi, Macdonald. Didn't expect to see you here. Mind scooting over, then?"
"Macdonald, it's too early for this," Sirius said, rubbing his eyes and leaning against the side of the bed. "We have a strict 'Shut the fuck up' policy on post full moon mornings, and you're violating it."
"So are you. But I can leave if you like," she offered, starting to rise, but Sirius held out a hand to stop her.
"Don't be stupid," he said. "Just, er, mind scooting over a bit?" He kicked off his shoes as she slid over to make room for him, then paused and smirked at her. "Are you naked under there?"
A mischievous smile flitted across her face. "Come see for yourself."
"Shagging is a violation of the shut the fuck up policy," Peter called from his bed. "Just, you know, as a reminder."
"Got it, Pete," Sirius said, peeking under the covers and grinning before climbing in next to Mary. "By the way, did you have anyone unexpected in your bed?"
"Sadly, no," Peter said before rolling over and pulling his curtains shut.
"Bad luck," Sirius said before closing his own curtains.
"I missed you," James whispered, pulling Lily close. Her tousled hair fanned out across the pillow and spilled onto the borrowed t-shirt she wore, and her face was drawn into a sleepy smile.
"I missed you too. How's Remus?"
James sighed. "He's in rough shape this morning, but no worse than usual. He should be awake by lunch time. We're going to stop by and visit him if you want to come."
He hadn't realized he was going to ask her until the words were already out of his mouth, but it felt right. It would have been best to run it by Remus first, but James also knew that seeing Lily would cheer him up, and Merlin, he could use all the cheering up he could get today.
She leaned in to kiss him, but when she pulled away her face fell and she traced a finger along his chin. "You're bleeding."
He frowned. "Am I? Must've cut myself on a tree branch or something. We were racing through the Forest. Sirius always thinks he can beat me, but he's just not built for speed like I am."
"I was worried about you," she said as she ran a hand through his hair, dislodging a bur and a bit of grass. "We couldn't sleep. That's why we came up here. It helped a bit, being in your bed."
"You have nothing to worry about," James said, brushing a piece of hair out of her face. "We're perfectly safe. But you're welcome to sleep up here during every full moon, if you like. I like the idea of you sleeping in my bed, wearing my clothes." He trailed a hand down to her waist and kissed her, and the warmth of her lips against his made him forget the crushing exhaustion he had been experiencing just minutes before.
"I only borrowed a t-shirt," she said, sliding a hand under his shirt and sending a shiver down his back.
He raised his eyebrows. "What did you wear for trousers, then?"
She pressed her lips against his ear and whispered, "I didn't wear any." When his eyes widened in surprise, she added, "I'm wearing knickers. I'm not a complete tart."
"Evans, I would never call you a tart," James said, leaning in to kiss her again. That hour of sleep was rapidly slipping away, yet James found he did not care one bit.
"James," Lily said, leaning into his touch despite her protests. "You need to sleep."
"Nah, I don't."
"But shagging goes against your policy," she reminded him, kissing his neck in a way that did not help her case at all.
"Snogging is allowed, though," he replied. "A bit of groping is fine, too, as long as it's quiet."
He kissed her again before tugging the curtains shut around them, resigning himself to being tired all day and feeling surprisingly happy about it.
"Hey, Lily? Will you hang on a second?"
Lily crammed the assortment of sandwiches and biscuits into her bag and turned to see Seven, standing in front of her and tugging on the end of her long braid.
"Hi, Seven," Lily said. "Are you looking for James?"
Seven shook her head, sending her braid flapping from side to side. "No, I was wondering if you were going to see Remus? I have his book."
"He's ill," Lily said, and she thought she detected a slight blush spreading across Seven's face. "He's in the hospital wing, but he should be out tonight, if you want to wait and give it to him then."
"I know," Seven said, avoiding Lily's eye. "That he's in the hospital wing, I mean. I borrowed this, and I know it's one of his favorites, so I thought reading it might cheer him up." She pressed a battered copy of The Hobbit into Lily's hand, flashing her a shy smile. "Tell him I hope he feels better," she added before hurrying away.
Lily attempted to place the book in her bag, but it got caught on the strap and tumbled onto the floor. The book had fallen open, and as she bent to retrieve it she noticed miniscule writing around the edge of the page. This struck her as odd, because Remus had scolded her several times for folding back the corner of a page to mark her place. If he regarded such behavior as scandalous, he would view writing in a book as a crime worthy of time in Azkaban, wouldn't he? Frowning, she stood and examined the book, flipping through the pages to find many notations inked onto the pages throughout the entire book. The tiny, careful writing offered the writer's thoughts on interesting or important sections of the book, but as Lily studied the words she realized with a start that this was not Remus's handwriting. One particular note caught her eye: I wonder if hobbits wear cardigans. I bet Bilbo Baggins would look adorable in a jumper with elbow patches (but not as adorable as you, obviously). Her eyes widened as she read the note several more times, then replayed her conversation with Seven, focusing on the way the other girl had blushed and avoided Lily's gaze.
Merlin, she thought, feeling both a rush of excitement and happiness for Remus and a twinge of irritation that he had kept it from her. Did any of the others know, or had he kept this secret all to himself? She mulled this over for a moment, turning the book over in her hand as she thought, before tucking it in her bag and setting off for the hospital wing. The knowledge bubbled up inside of her, threatening to burst out, but she repressed the urge to announce her new knowledge. She could only imagine the day Remus was having, and revealing something he had obviously wanted to keep secret would add to his strain, which was the last thing she wanted to do. Taking a deep breath, she entered the hospital wing and followed the sound of her friends' voices to the only occupied bed.
"Hi," she said, pausing at the end of Remus's bed. She felt out of place and wondered if she should have come at all. Sirius and Peter had set up a game of chess on an unoccupied bed while James lounged against Remus's bedside table, catching him up on what he had missed in class. This was a routine for them, and they all looked at home, as though they belonged. Lily glanced over at Mary, standing back and looking as uncertain as Lily felt. Who were they to intrude on this private moment? The doubt built inside Lily until she was ready to turn around and retreat, but then James spotted Lily and broke into a wide grin.
"Evans! There you are. We were wondering if you'd forgotten about us."
He strode over to Lily and took her hand, then pulled her closer to Remus's bed. "Is the food in your bag?"
Lily opened her bag and James selected a sandwich before handing one to Sirius, Peter, and Mary.
He settled onto the edge of Remus's bed to eat his sandwich, watching with mild interest as Peter captured one of Sirius's pieces.
"Aren't you hungry, Remus?" she asked as she helped herself to a sandwich, then wished she hadn't spoken, afraid this was an offensive or insensitive question.
"No," Remus said in a voice more faint and hoarse than usual. "But this lot won't leave me alone until I eat something, so I had a bit of chocolate." He gestured to an open chocolate bar on the table beside him.
"You'd better eat the rest of that, or I'll sic Pomfrey on you," Sirius said, glancing over his shoulder to shoot Remus a disapproving look before turning his attention back to the chess game in time to see Peter capturing his queen. "Fuck, how did I not see that coming?"
"See?" Remus said, nodding his head in Sirius's direction before raising his eyebrows at Lily. "Such a bloody nag." In spite of his protests, he reached for the chocolate bar and took another bite. "Padfoot, are you just losing because it cheers me up? You don't have to do that on my account."
"Rubbish," Peter said, grinning in triumph as he put Sirius's king in check. "He's not losing on purpose. He's just this bad on his own."
"Sod this game." Sirius scowled and threw up his hands in defeat, then stood and walked around to the other side of Remus's bed. "Macdonald, come over here and tell Moony how I woke you up this morning."
Mary came closer and leaned against the side of the bed, then frowned. "Sorry, are we crowding you? I can throw this one off the bed for you, if you like."
She gestured at Sirius, but Remus shook his head.
"It's okay, I'm used to it," he said, grimacing as he shifted his legs under the blanket to make room. "One time he fell asleep on my bed, and James and Peter just left him here and went to class. Pomfrey didn't even bat an eye, just threw an extra blanket over him and gave me my pain potion."
"That does not surprise me at all," Mary said, grinning at Sirius. "You just make yourself at home, don't you, Black?"
"Says the person who made herself at home in my bed last night," Sirius said, hooking an arm around her waist and pulling her down onto his lap. "Listen to this, Moony. You're going to laugh."
"Oh, right," Mary said before describing the events of the morning.
As Lily listened to Mary's story, punctuated by laughter from the three boys, she really looked at Remus for the first time since she entered the hospital wing. Dark circles under his eyes stood out on his pale skin, and several cuts were scattered across his face and arms. The slight tension in his jaw and the brief flash of pain that crossed his face at the slightest movement revealed the lingering effects of the transformation, but he wore a weary smile in spite of his obvious exhaustion and discomfort. She glanced around at the others, watching James toy with a Snitch he had pulled from his pocket while Peter watched from the next bed and Sirius chimed in to add details to Mary's story. There was a relaxed, comfortable atmosphere that put her at ease, and she understood why Madam Pomfrey put up with their noisy chatter and the collection of crumbs across the floor and bed from their makeshift lunch.
"...And he had the nerve to complain when I was lying naked in his bed," Mary finished, glancing back at Sirius and shaking her head in indignation. "Sorry, Remus, that's probably too much information, but it was important to the story."
"You were violating the 'shut the fuck up' rule!" Sirius protested, his voice carrying across the hospital wing.
"Language, Mr. Black!" Madam Pomfrey called, bustling over to fix him with a stern glare.
"Sorry," Sirius said, peering around Mary's head to flash Madam Pomfrey an apologetic grin. "It cheers up, Remus, though. That's the only reason I use such deplorable language. Look how much better he looks." He gestured at Remus, who rolled his eyes and sighed in exasperation. "You should be thanking me, really."
Madam Pomfrey shook her head but failed to conceal a small smile as she handed Remus a cup of potion. "Clean up that mess, Mr. Black," she said, gesturing at the large pile of crumbs that was forming on the blanket next to Sirius.
"She loves us," Sirius said as Madam Pomfrey retreated back to her office and he set to work Vanishing the crumbs. "Especially me."
"She thinks you're a pain in the arse," Remus said. "Don't forget the crumbs over on this side of the bed."
"She pretends she thinks I'm a pain in the arse," Sirius amended. "But really she loves me."
Peter glanced at the clock on the wall and frowned. "I suppose we should get going soon," he said, a note of regret in his voice.
Remus's face fell, but he did his best to conceal his disappointment. "Make sure you turn in that essay for me. And don't let Padfoot change the name to Mike Oxlong or anything," he said, grinning as they all stood up and gathered their things.
"Oh, Remus, I almost forgot." Lily reached into her bag and pulled out the well-worn copy of The Hobbit. "I was meant to give this to you." She glanced around to see if anyone else was listening, but they were occupied with trying to catch the Snitch that was now fluttering above the window. "Seven heard you were ill and thought you might want to have this back. She says she hopes you feel better soon."
His smile had started to slip as the shadow of pain crept back into his face, but at her words he broke into a brilliant smile.
"Thanks," he said, accepting the book and taking a surreptitious peek inside, and his smile widened as he spotted the handwritten notes. "Reading this book does always make me feel a bit better, er, the day after. If you see her before I do, tell her I said thanks."
As he leaned back against his pillows and opened to the first page, his whole body relaxed and some of the tension on his face eased. He bent closer to the page to read one of the tiny annotations, and she knew his smile was not simply due to the comfort of the familiar book.
"See you, Moony!" James said, lacing his fingers through Lily's.
"You can watch me beat Padfoot in chess again later when Pomfrey lets you out of here," Peter added.
"I'll make sure it's a ukulele-free evening in the common room," Mary said, glancing sideways at Sirius and smirking.
"Are you suggesting listening to me play the ukulele is anything less than a lovely, relaxing experience?" Sirius slung an arm around Mary and waved to Remus over his shoulder. "Make sure you eat the rest of that chocolate bar, Moony! Pomfrey will tell me if you don't."
They set off for class, talking and laughing as they hurried along the corridors, but Remus's contented smile stayed with Lily all through class and during dinner, and lingered in her mind as she fell asleep.
Saturday, October 29, 1977
James had been too exhausted the previous day to notice anything out of the ordinary, and he had gone straight to bed after Quidditch practice and fallen into a deep, dreamless sleep. As soon as he saw Lily the next morning and was able to process her expression with a well-rested mind, however, he knew something was up. There was a certain smug quality to her smile, a tantalizing hint of knowledge lurking in her eyes. He waited for her to broach the subject, enjoying her obvious impatience to reveal the secret. They were taking the long way back from the library, holding hands and enjoying the deserted corridors, when Lily drew to a stop and glanced at James with a mischievous smile on her face.
"What?" James said, watching her with amusement. He could see her struggling to contain the secret that strained the seams of her self-restraint.
"Nothing," she said, but her tone was not at all convincing. "Nothing, just, well, nothing." She tugged at his hand and started walking again.
"Okay," he said, shrugging and setting off along the corridor again.
He darted glances at her, grinning as he saw the inner conflict reflected on her face. She managed to hold in her knowledge until they reached the portrait hole, where she pulled him away from the Fat Lady and leaned in close.
"Okay, I'm going to tell you something but you have to keep it a secret," she said, speaking in a low, urgent murmur. "I don't actually know for sure - well, it's not confirmed or anything, but it does explain a lot of things-"
James watched her face light up with excitement as the words tumbled out in an eager, jumbled stream. "Evans," James said, grinning. "What's the secret?"
"Well I was going to get to it if you hadn't interrupted," she said, rolling her eyes. "Yesterday Seven asked me to return Remus's copy of The Hobbit and I happened to notice she had written little notes in the margins, and one of them was a bit suspicious, so I started thinking about it, and I think they're secretly dating." She said all of this in one breath, then fell silent and waited for him to respond, watching him with wide eyes.
James ran a hand through his hair as he absorbed this information. "What do you mean, suspicious?" He smirked and raised his eyebrows. "Like an 'I want to shag you hobbit style' sort of note?"
She burst into laughter. "How exactly do you shag someone hobbit style?"
"Well I dunno, do I? I don't even know what a hobbit is," James said, throwing up his hands.
"You'd know if you bothered to listen," she said with a sigh. "Remus and I had a whole conversation about the book the other day and you were sitting right there, but never mind that now. We can't stand around here all night talking about this. Let's go up to the dormitory."
"Are you going to demonstrate hobbit style shagging?" James asked, but she only rolled her eyes and gave the password, then pulled him through the portrait hole and into the common room.
"You're not nearly excited enough about this," she said, lowering her voice as they passed Remus and Peter playing chess in the usual spot.
"Well you still haven't told me what the note said," James said as he bounded up the stairs after her. "All you said is it seemed suspicious. That's not a lot to go on."
She pushed open the door and led James to his bed, sitting down and turning to him with an exasperated look on her face.
"I wouldn't just jump to conclusions over nothing, James. Give me a bit of credit, would you? All right, don't repeat this to anyone, but it said, 'I bet Bilbo Baggins would look adorable in a jumper, but not as adorable as you.'"
James's eyes widened. "Really? Do you think that means…"
"What else could it mean?" Lily said. "It's not the sort of thing she'd write if they were only friends, is it? Even the fact that he let her write all over his book is telling."
James nodded. "Shit, you're right! He doesn't even like it if you fold the pages." He fell silent for a moment, running a hand through his hair as a thoughtful expression spread across his face. "Bloody hell, they're dating, aren't they?"
"That's what I've been trying to tell you!" Lily held up a hand. "I don't think we should say anything to anyone else yet. Not until we figure out the best way to handle this, all right?"
James shrugged. "Yeah, I suppose." He ran his hand through his hair again. "Remus has been going to the library in the evenings a lot, hasn't he?"
"He has. I feel like we're bad friends for not picking up on this," Lily said, frowning. "But I suppose we didn't pay much attention because we've been too busy, well…"
"Snogging each other?" James supplied, grinning. "I'd say it's a valid reason to be distracted."
"Has Seven seemed different lately?" she asked. "More distracted at practice or anything?"
"No," James said, shaking his head. "But she wouldn't. She's really focused, doesn't let anything distract her when she's on the pitch, and we have a match coming up. But I guess she has seemed a lot happier lately. Smiling for no reason, that sort of thing. Actually, so has Moony, now that I think of it, don't you think? I mean, other than a bit of Moony angst when you and Mary found out about his furry little problem, he's been, well…" His voice trailed off as he tried to think of the right phrase.
"Over the moon?" a voice from Sirius's bed suggested before bursting into laughter at his own joke.
James and Lily looked at each other, eyes wide. "Padfoot?" James called.
"Come on, neither of you thought that was funny? It was bloody perfect," Sirius said, poking his head through the curtains of his bed.
"You've been in here listening the whole time?" Lily demanded. "What if we'd started, you know…"
"Shagging?" Sirius finished. "You can say it, Evans, we all know you're doing it and it's nothing to be ashamed of. Anyway, you weren't shagging, so it's a moot point. The point is-"
"Come out from there, I can't take you seriously like that," James said, then held up a hand. "Hang on. Pads, are you naked in there?"
"Offended is what I am!" Sirius exclaimed. "Were you really just not going to tell me about this? If I had an interesting secret, you'd be the first person I'd tell, Prongs!"
"We were going to tell you, just not immediately," James said.
"But why not immediately? We could've discussed it and speculated about whether or not they're shagging and decided on how to proceed together. What about Pete and Macdonald? They deserve to know, too."
"Is Macdonald in there with you, by the way?" James asked.
"No, she went to shower. It's just me," Sirius said, throwing back the curtains to prove his point. "Shit, sorry, forgot I was naked." He seemed to feel that it didn't much matter now that the initial shock was over, because he stood up and leaned against the bed post.
Lily blushed and turned to face the wall, but James, used to Sirius's antics, just fixed his gaze on the ceiling and continued the conversation.
"Well, anyway, now that we've told you-"
"You didn't tell me, I overheard," Sirius interrupted.
James waved away the interruption. "Well, either way, now that you know, what do you reckon?"
"It's fucking brilliant," Sirius said, grinning. "Macdonald and I were just talking about this the other day."
"What were we talking about?" Mary asked as she entered the room and sat down on Sirius's bed. She glanced at Sirius and raised her eyebrows, but otherwise she did not react to his unexplained nakedness.
"About getting Moony and Seven together," Sirius said. He turned to her, his face lit up with excitement. "Apparently they've been seeing each other and didn't tell anybody."
"Really?" Her eyes widened and darted between Sirius, Lily, and James. "How do you know?"
Lily explained the note she had found in Remus's book while Mary listened with rapt attention. When she finished, Mary fell silent for a moment, shaking her head in wonder.
"Bloody hell. I'm so happy for them, but why are they keeping it a secret? Don't they realize we've all wanted them to be together for ages?" She pushed a lock of damp hair out of her hair and frowned.
"It's a very Moony thing to do, though, isn't it?" Sirius said, tapping his fingers against the bed post as he thought. "He overthinks things. Maybe he's worried if we all know it'll somehow ruin things?"
"That doesn't make any sense," James said. "But you're right, it is a very Moony thing to do."
"Why is nobody asking the most important question?" Sirius said, looking around at the others with an expectant look on his face. When nobody responded, he threw his hands up in irritation. "Do we think they're shagging?"
"Merlin, I hope so," Mary said. "Why the fuck not?"
"I dunno," James said, retrieving a Quaffle from his trunk and tossing it from hand to hand as he spoke. "I don't think he would let his guard down enough to let anyone see him naked. Not willingly, anyway."
Lily took a peek over her shoulder, then blushed and jerked her head back to face the other way. "Unlike Sirius, who has no problem just standing here naked like it's completely bloody normal!"
Sirius looked down and grinned. "Shit, you're right. I can't have this conversation naked." He made no move to put clothes on, however, but remained leaning against the bedpost watching James toss the Quaffle.
"You've shared a dormitory with him for the past six years and you've never seen him naked?" Mary asked.
"He's really private and self-conscious," Sirius said. "Always changes behind his curtains or in the loo and wears a shirt when we go swimming. He doesn't even like sleeping shirtless. I dunno why. It's not like we haven't seen…"
His voice trailed off, and his expression turned dark as he and James exchanged a knowing look. James thought of the shame in Remus's eyes as he explained exactly what they would see the first time they watched him transform.
"I can't wear any clothes," he said, staring down at the ground. "There's no point, they'll just be ripped to pieces when I transform. I usually take everything off a few minutes before and then just wrap a blanket around myself, because it's bloody awkward just sitting there naked. But right before I change back I'm obviously not in any fit state to wrap up in a blanket, and I'm not conscious for a few minutes afterwards, so I'll be, you know…" His voice trailed off and he rubbed his eyes, emphasizing the dark circles underneath them.
"You'll be naked when you change back?" James said, shrugging. "It's okay, Remus, you can say it. It takes a lot more than that to shock us."
"And we don't bloody care about seeing you naked," Sirius said, clapping him on the back. "You all see me naked at least once a week, and you haven't stopped being friends with me yet."
"I mean, I'd prefer to see a bit less of you, but I gave up on that a long time ago," James added with a grin.
"We spent two years doing something we have absolutely no business even attempting and kept a mandrake leaf in our mouths for a month and woke up early to do that bloody incantation every day at dawn. James could've ended up with antlers for the rest of his life if this went wrong," Peter pointed out.
"That wouldn't have been the worst thing in the world," James protested. "My antlers are excellent."
Peter grinned and nodded. "Yeah, you're right. Anyway, my point is we went through all that, you think we give a shit about this?"
"We'll throw the blanket over you and call it good, all right?" Sirius said, shaking his head. "Fuck, Remus, you think too much." He nodded at the half-eaten chocolate frog sitting forgotten on Remus's bed. "Now quit worrying and eat your chocolate frog before I do."
A tiny smile spread across Remus's face as he lifted his gaze from the ground. "All right," he said, reaching for the chocolate frog and taking a bite. "Thanks."
James gave a small shake of his head, and Sirius nodded and didn't finish his thought. That was a secret that the four of them shared out of necessity, and the girls didn't need to know.
"Okay, I really need to stop standing around naked," Sirius said, but he still did not retrieve his clothes from the pile by his bed.
"What do we do, then?" Lily asked. "Say nothing?"
"That's rubbish," Mary said, blowing a lock of hair out of her face. "I want to know if they're shagging."
"We should at least tell Peter," James said. "But I don't think we should say anything to Moony yet. Definitely not now, so soon after the full moon. Let's just wait it out and see how it goes."
"Lily's not great at waiting it out," Mary said, raising her eyebrows at Lily. "She can't keep a secret to save her life."
"You better not say anything, Evans," Sirius said, fixing her with a stern glare. "Or I swear I'll hex you."
"Evans, definitely keep your mouth shut," James said, leaning in and kissing her cheek. "But Pads, I'd rather if you didn't threaten to hex my girlfriend while you're not wearing any clothes."
Sirius looked down and chucked. "Damnit, I'm still standing around naked."
"Here, you prat." Mary picked up Sirius's clothes and tossed them in his direction. "So, we say nothing for now?"
Sirius nodded as he pulled on his pants. "Say nothing. One of us can tell Peter the next chance we get. And everyone, pay attention in case we can find any evidence to answer the shagging question."
"Which is obviously the most important takeaway from this conversation," James said, grinning.
"I mean, is it not? Don't all of us want to know the answer?" Sirius finished buttoning his trousers and pulled a shirt over his head. "All right, let's head down to the common room and see how long it takes for Evans to break down and say something. I give her an hour tops."
Remus and Peter played chess for almost two hours before Remus switched to reading and fell asleep with his head leaning against the arm of the chair. James waited a few minutes to be safe before tapping Peter on the shoulder and gesturing at the portrait hole.
"Evans figured something out," James said once they had strolled to a deserted section of the corridor. "We think Moony and Seven are secretly dating."
"Bloody hell, really?" Peter said, widening his eyes in shock, but there was a note of falseness in his tone that James recognized at once.
"You prat, you already knew," he said, giving Peter's shoulder a light shove. "How long have you known? Why didn't you tell us?"
Peter shook his head, looking guilty. "I'm sorry. He didn't tell me or anything - I, er, sort of saw them together. I would've told you, but, I dunno, I thought it wasn't really my business to tell, because I really shouldn't have seen it in the first place, and he obviously didn't want us to know…"
"It's all right, Wormtail," James said, giving him a reassuring grin. "I suppose you were just being a considerate friend. Not like the rest of us. We couldn't wait to blab to each other about it." He paused for a moment. "Does he know you know?"
Peter shook his head. "I didn't want to upset him. And I also didn't want him to think I was spying on them."
James raised his eyebrows. "Well, were you?"
"Not intentionally," Peter said, blushing. "I, well, sometimes when I can't sleep I transform and just sort of wander the castle. Not to spy on people, just for something to do, but sometimes I end up seeing things I'm not meant to see, and that's how I found out about Remus and Seven."
"What exactly did you see?" James asked, glancing sideways at him.
"They were just snogging, but definitely heading towards shagging," Peter replied. His face was now bright red and he didn't meet James's eye. "They were, er, taking their clothes off."
"Really?" James asked. "He let her see-"
"He shut the light off first," Peter said. "That's when I got out of there. I wasn't trying to hang around and watch or anything, I'm not a weirdo."
"I know," James said, amused. He hesitated for a moment, then continued, "How many people have you seen shagging?"
"Just a few," he said, looking even more uncomfortable. "Like I said, I don't try to catch people shagging, it just sort of happens, and I just check to see who it is before I get the fuck out of there." A hint of a smile crossed his face as he added, "I saw Stacy Tremblay with Bertram Aubrey recently."
"Bloody hell," James said, gaping at him. "Are you kidding? We've got to tell Padfoot, he'll die laughing. Maybe it'll distract him from being angry that you didn't tell us - he overheard Evans and I talking about it, and he was so offended he emerged from his bed completely naked to tell us off."
Peter chuckled. "That sounds like Padfoot." He hesitated for a moment, picking at his cuticle. "Seven knows I know. She…" He opened his mouth to say more, then closed it and gave a small shake of his head. "She's great."
"Course she is. I only pick the most excellent people to be on the Quidditch team." James grinned and ran a hand through his hair. "Come on. Let's go tell Padfoot that he and Bertram Aubrey have a shagging partner in common. I bet he'll die of shock to find out Aubrey's had sex with anybody at all."
As they headed back to the common room, James glanced sideways at Peter and wondered what other secrets he might be hiding. He entertained this thought for a moment before resolving to leave it alone for now, and instead returned to laughing and joking about Stacy Tremblay and Bertram Aubrey as he looked forward to a relaxing Saturday afternoon with his friends.