Chapter 11: Michael's Secret Stuff
In the Tune Squad's locker room, the toons were still feeling sad about losing, but Michael was not giving up. "Look I know we're down," said Michael. "Oh yeah, let's hear the story," said Daffy sarcastically. "But I've been in this situation many times before," said Michael. "Oh this is a piece of work," said Plucky. "We can still win this thing. Its not over with. We gotta come together," said Michael. "Oh yeah," said Daffy, rolling his eyes. "We gotta believe in ourselves. We can come back and win this game," said Michael. "Yeah, right. that's gonna help us," said Plucky in a bored voice.
Everybody heard a knock on the door. They turned to see Stan who was charred. He moaned in pain. "Looks like Stan just had a close encounter with a bug zapper," said Daffy. "At least it wasn't a Dilophosaurus," said Plucky. "The Monstars! The Monstars!" coughed Stan. Michael and the toons looked at Stan with sorrow as he fell onto the floor. "Oh, my!" said Lola. "Sahcrebleu!" said both Pepé and Fifi. "Ooh, that's gotta hurt," said Daffy. Michael, Bugs and Beaky Buzzard began to help Stan back up on his feet. "You all right, Stan?" asked Michael. "The Monstars! The Monstars . . . stole the talent from the NBA players!" said Stan. The toons gasped in shock as Stan sat down and they groaned in worry. "So that's what happened to those guys," said Michael. "Why those good for nothing hooligans!" said Julie, getting angry. "I thought that they looked like monstrous versions of the five players who lost their talents," said Buster. "It all makes sense now," said Babs. "Yes," said Bimbette. "I think we should qui-qui-forfeit," said Porky. "Yeah!" said some of the other toons. Suddenly, Fifi grabbed Porky by the shirt. "No! Quitteeng ees naht ahn option!" said Fifi. "I'd say ve can get zhem disqualified for using other pwayers' tawents iwwegawwy," said Arnold. "But we have no proof," said Beaky. "I can like, totally read their minds and project it for everybody to see," said Shirley.
"Listen, I didn't get dragged down, just to get my butt whipped by a bunch of ugly Monstars," said Michael, pointing to Porky. Porky fainted. "I ain't going out like that. We're letting them push us around!" said Michael. As Michael was speaking, Bugs was filling a bottle with water from the sink. He hummed as he wrote a label on it. "We gotta fight em back! We gotta take it to them! We gotta get right in their faces! Now what do you say? Are you with me or not?" asked Michael. Most of the toons were asleep, except for Bugs, Fifi, Arnold, Minerva, Furrball and some other select toons. Bugs shook the water battle. "Eh, finished? Eh, great speech and all, doc. Eh, you had them riveted. But, uh didn't you forget something?" asked Bugs. "What?" said Michael. "Your secret stuff," said Bugs, showing him the bottle. It read "Michael's Secret Stuff. Bugs drank some of the water and the others woke up, feeling surprised at the sight of Bugs suddenly getting all muscular. He moved around, flexing his muscles as part of his jersey ripped. The toons were impressed. "Wow!" said Lola in awe. "Ooh la la!" said Fifi. "Whoa, nice deltoids!" said Daffy, impressed. "Play along!" said Bugs, winking.
Michael took the bottle and looked at it. Bugs grabbed it and tried to get it away from Michael. "Eh, stop hogging it Mike. We're your teammates," said Bugs. The bottle went flying into Porky's hand. He drank some of it. "'Secwet' stuff?" asked Elmer. Elmer drank some next. "Secret stuff?" asked Daffy. "You wouldn't hold out on us, would you?" asked Sylvester. "No. I mean, I didn't think you guys really needed it," said Michael as Barnyard Dawg drank some of the water. "I mean you're so tough and competitive," said Michael. "We're also chicken son," said Foghorn. Sylvester and Wile E. were fighting over the bottle. "We need it bad," said Foghorn. Foghorn snatched the bottle and drank more of the water. "Hey!" said Sylvester. Foghorn then passes it to Fifi who drank her share. "Zat heet ze spaht," said Fifi. Fifi passed to one toon after another til Daffy had it. "Uh, I'd like a sip of that," said Stan. "Yeah!" said Daffy. "Could I have a sip please?" asked Lola. "You know, this goes against to everything they taught me in health class," said Daffy. "Do you wanna win or not?" asked Michael. "Bottoms up," said Daffy. He then drank the water and gave it to Stan. "Yummy," said Daffy. "All right, how about we go out and kick some alien butt huh?" asked Michael. Michael and the toons put their hands together. "Let's go. All right. Ready?" asked Michael. "Yeah!" said the Toons. They jumped up and headed for the door. Stan tried to drink the secret stuff, but it was already empty.
(Insert "Get Ready For This")
Michael and the Toon Squad ran out to the court, ready to start the second half. The crowd cheered loudly once they appeared. Bang and Daffy growled at each other. Taz growled as well. Porky and Bupkus growled as well. "Le grrrrr!" growled Fifi. The toons were ready for their comeback. Bang threw the ball to Pound. "Open! " said Pound. He caught the ball. But then, Bugs rode in on a motorcycle, dressed like a mailman. "Coming through!" said Bugs as he stole the ball from Pound. "Whoa!" cried Pound in surprise. Nawt ran after Michael Jordon. "Bugs!" said Michael. Bugs braked his motorcycle. "Special delivery!" said Bugs. And he threw the ball to Michael. Michael slam dunked and scored two more points. The toons cheered. "Way to go, Bugs!" said Roger Rabbit. "Now that was funny," said Jessica Rabbit. Mr. Swackhammer saw what happened. "No! Boo!" said Mr. Swackhammer.
Bupkus now had the ball and dribbled it a few times before he jumped up in the air. But before he could slam dunk, his eyes widened with shock. For the hoop was full of rockets and other explosive devices. He stopped and whined with fear as he looked at the audience. KA-BOOM! The explosives detonated, frying Bupkus. The ones who set the explosives were Bugs and Wile E. Coyote. Wile E. had the detonator box. "Eh, nice kaboom, Wile E.," said Bugs. "Thank you. It was genius. Pure geni . . . ," said Wile E. But he was rudely interrupted when Bupkus seized him. He showed his teeth. Before he could deliver harm to the brown coyote, somebody shot some of his teeth off. It was Elmer Fudd and Yosemite Sam. They were wearing black suits and sunglasses and had a pistol in each hand. They looked at each other before turning their attention back to Bupkus. They blasted the last of his teeth.
As Nawt dribbled the ball, Shirley used her psychic powers to snatch the ball from Nawt. "Hey!" said Nawt. "Babs, catch!" said Shirley. Babs caught the ball and she slam dunked the ball. "Alright!" said Babs. Michael had the ball he dribbled it, trying to dodge Bang, Nawt, and Bupkus. They tried to catch Michael but failed. Michael threw the ball into the hoop, earning two more points for the team and the crowd cheered. Yakko was dribbling the ball. Blanko tried to stop Yakko, but heard a voice. "Yoo-hoo! Blue boy!" said the voice. It was Minerva Mink. She then delivered a big wet kiss on his lips, causing him to faint. That gave Yakko enough time to score. When nobody was looking, Minerva spat out and gagged. "I hope I never have to waste a kiss on a hoodlum like him again," said Minerva.
The Monstars had the ball next. Blanko passed the ball to Pound. "Let's teach 'em a lesson," said Pound. He ran toward the hoop. Sylvester took out a fishing pole and swung it. It latched onto Pound's shorts and he pulled them off. Blanko looked at his teammate, shocked. Pound stopped and saw that his shorts were gone, leaving him butt naked. "Hey! What . . . ?!" asked Pound. He covered his butt with jersey, smiling and blushing with embarrassment. "Nice butt!" taunted Lola. The crowd laughed at Pound while Michael just smiled with amusement and gets back in the game. Even Bruce couldn't help but chuckle. Taz had the ball and slam dunked it. Roderick Rat had the ball and was dribbling it. Nawt tried to grab his tail, but Roderick had his tail whip him in the face. The male rat then jumped into the air. "For Perfecto Prep!" said Roderick. He then slam dunked, earning two more points.
Michael had the ball next and headed for the hoop Pound and Bupkus tried to catch him but failed. Michael slam dunked. Brain dribbled the ball before doing his own slam dunk. "Yes!" said Brain. Mr. Swackhammer was banging his head on part of the table. Foghorn and Sylvester lifted Porky who had the ball. Pound was after him. "Er, going up," said Porky. "You're mine boy," said Pound. Porky slammed the ball into the hoop and Pound gets hit in the face with the ball. Stan, Granny and Witch Hazel were getting excited since the team was catching up. Cause right now, the Tune Squad had 45 points and the Monstars hadn't scored any new points since the first half. "Slam me!" said Granny. Stan did a high five with Granny, but it caused her to fall backwards. "Yeah! How's that?" asked Stan. Nawt, Pound, and Bang were charging in with the ball hoping to score.
(End Music)
(Insert "French Music")
But then, Michael held up Pepé Le Pew, while he, Bugs, Foghorn and Tweety were wearing gas-masks. "Hello! A leettle surprise fahr you, my friends," said Pepé. He chuckled as he released his terrible odor. Bupkus, Bang and Blanko sniffed the bad smell, gasping before fainting. Pepé chuckled before kissing the ball into the hoop. "Two points," said Pepé. "Wait a go, Pepé!" cried Fifi excitedly. Hearts floated above her. Even Penelope Pussycat cheered for Pepé. "Le yay!" cried Penelope.
(End Music)
(Insert "Second Half" from Space Jam)
Michael jumped in the air with Pound and Nawt growled trying to stop him. He slam dunked the ball in the hoop hitting Nawt in the head. Little Beeper got out a can of black paint and a paint brush. He then began to speed around Bupkus, painting him til he was covered from head to toe in black paint. Little Beeper then finished the job by painting a white stripe and gluing a fake skunk tail onto his butt. The next thing the purple Monstar knew, both Fifi La Fume and Bimbette Skunk grabbed onto him, lovestruck, complete with heart eyes. But only this time, they were pretending to fall in love. "Hello, my hunkilicious hubbie!" said Bimbette. "Keess me, mahn ahthleteec ahmahre!" said Fifi. The two skunkettes began to kiss Bupkus silly, covering him in kiss marks. Fifi's lipstick was pink, while Bimbette's was red. "Help! Get these lovesick loonies off of me!" cried Bupkus as he ran around, flailing his arms. The crowd began to laugh at Bupkus' humiliation. Fifi's family were laughing too. Since Fifi and Bimbette's stenches were going off since they were in love, everybody in the audience that wasn't a skunk were wearing gas masks. Ash and his friends were seeing what was happening on TV and were laughing as well, especially Pikachu. "Yeah! Yeah! That's how it feels like!" said Pikachu. Fifi and Bimbette winked at Furrball, signaling him that it was his cue. Furrball jumped onto top of Bang's head and jumped to the hoop and slam dunked. "Alright, Furrball!" said Julie. Penelope Pussycat also let out a yell of excitement. "Great work, Furrball!" cheered May. May's Skitty mewed excitedly as well. "That cat's got talent!" said Danny. "He sure does," said Sawyer. Hearing those words, made Furrball beam.
Nawt had the ball and was about to score when Elmyra suddenly grabbed onto his upper body. "My little alien! Once we win the game, I'm gonna hug you, squeeze you, change your diaper and love you to pieces!" said Elmyra. "Get her off of me! Get her off of me!" cried Nawt. The red Monstar was so busy trying to shake the pet obsessive girl off that he dropped the ball. "I'll take that ball if you don't mind, you dweeb!" said Montana Max as he grabbed the ball. He then slam dunked the ball. "Yeah!" said Monty. "Wait a go, Monty!" said Elmyra. Bimbette Skunk used her tail to spring herself up to the hoop and she slam dunked. Everybody cheered for the pink skunkette. At that moment, Bimbette saw Johnny Pew with Elmyra's family. Although she didn't know who exactly he was with. Johnny Pew! He came to see little ol' me!, thought Bimbette. She blew a kiss at the blue skunk.
Bang had the ball, but not for long. Little Beeper and Anais began to run around him. They ran so fast that they made him dizzy. He dropped the ball and the Roadrunner grabbed the ball with his blue head feathers. The Roadrunner ran to the hoop, jumped and slam dunked, earning two more points for the Toon Squad. Everybody cheered. "Ahlright!" said Anais. She and Little Beeper did a high five. Michael had the ball, Bang tried to catch the ball but tripped over his own feet and Michael shoots into the hoop. By now, the Toon Squad now had 62 points. "Dang!" said Mr. Swackhammer. His eyes glowed red with fury.
Daffy then began to paint the back of Pound's shorts red. "Ooh, this will be good." said Daffy. The black duck pointed at his shorts for the crowd and they all laughed at this. But then, Toro the bull saw the red painted shorts and everyone looked at him as the bullring fanfare sounded. He snorted and growled angrily. Toro jumped off the stands, running to Pound with his horns. Foghorn and Porky jumped out of the way as Daffy move aside. Pound felt scared and he turned his head to see Toro coming at him with his horns down. BAM! Toro hit Pound's butt, sending the orange Monstar flying above the air screaming in pain. "Ole!" shouted the crowd.
Both Tweety and Sweetie were flying around and Monstars surrounded them. "Okay, birdie," said Bang. " Uh-oh," said Tweety & Sweetie. The Monstars showed them their teeth about to hurt the two birds. Tweety and his student had enough of getting picked on and they both let out karate yells. The Monstars gasped in shock. Tweety punched Pound and Bupkus. Sweetie punched Bang in the stomach. She twisted Blanko's neck too. Tweety then bit Pound's ear, which caused him to yell in pain. After that, Sweetie pulled Bupkus' hair, ripping it off. Tweety then kicked Bang in the chin and he fell to the floor. Elmer jumped in the air and slam dunked the ball into the hoop. The crowd and the team cheered loudly. "Yes!" said Michael. The score was now Tune Squad 66 and Monstars 68.
(End Music)
Mr. Swackhammer had been fed up to this point. "Time out!" cried Mr. Swackhammer. He walked angrily down the stands toward the court. Marvin blew the whistle, trying to stop him. But Mr. Swackhammer grabbed the martian. "Shut up, you little bug. Get away from me. Pow-wow," said Mr. Swackhammer. Michael and the toons headed for the bench, giving each other high fives. "All right guys, We're right back in this game. Come on now. Let's play some tough defense," said Michael. The toons agreed with Michael. Bimbette was thinking about Johnny Pew. "He was there. Johnny Pew was there. He came all this way to see me play," said Bimbette. She let out a sigh as hearts floated above her. Fifi just rolled her eyes, still angry about how Johnny treated her.
Mr. Swackhammer started to berate his minions. "Why didn't you get this guy?" asked Mr. Swackhammer furiously, pointing at Michael. "He's a baseball player," said Bupkus. "Yeah, boss a baseball player," said Mr. Swackhammer. "Looks like a basketball player to me," said Mr. Swackhammer dryly. "Yeah, me too," said Blanko. "Shhh," said Bang. "He's the one I want for Moron Mountain," said Mr. Swackhammer.
Michael and Bugs overheard everything what Swackhammer said and had enough. "Hey!" said Michael angrily. This got Swackhammer's attention and turned to face him. "Are you talking to me?" asked Mr. Swackhammer. "Yeah I'm talking to you, you want a piece of me? Come and get it," said Michael. Swackhammer smiled and chuckled evilly before walking up to Michael. "Uh-oh," said Bupkus, smirking. "What do you have in mind?" asked Mr. Swackhammer. "What about we raise the stakes a little bit?" asked Michael. "Hmm. Interesting," said Mr. Swackhammer as he puffed his cigar. "If we win, the toons not just stay here on Earth, you give the NBA players their talent back," said Michael.
"But what if we win?" asked Mr. Swackhammer. "If you win?" asked Michael. "Uh-huh," said Mr. Swackhammer. "You get me," said Michael firmly. "Good deal boss," said Pound gleefuly. He and the other Monstars laughed with evil glee. "Eh doc do you think its a good idea?" asked Bugs nervously. Michael placed his hand on Bugs mouth silencing him. Swackhammer blowed smoke from his cigar and showed Michael images of him being on Moron Mountain. "You'll be our star attraction. You'll sign autographs all day long . . . and play one on one with the paying customers," said Mr. Swackhammer. A kid alien shot a ball and cheered happily which shocked Michael. "And you'll always lose," said Mr. Swackhammer. The kid alien blew a raspberry at Michael and the images ended. Michael looked back to Swackhammer. "Do we have a deal?" asked Mr. Swackhammer smirking. "Deal," said Michael, holding out his hand. Mr. Swackhammer chuckled and shakes his hand with Michael. "All right!" said Mr. Swackhammer. They went back to their respective sides of the field. Bugs followed Michael. "I don't think you should've done that doc," said Bugs. "I have faith in my team," said Michael assuringly. Mr. Swackhammer glared evilly at the Monstars. "Crush 'em!" ordered Mr. Swackhammer.
I hope you had a good laugh reading this chapter since this adapts the scene where the toons turn the tides by being themselves. Did anybody catch the Jurassic Park and Thor Ragnarok references? Just to let you know, the final line of the Tune Squad will be different from the original film. So please don't give me a hard time.