Summary: Tony teaches Morgan how to use a phone. It has unexpected consequences.
Rating: T
It was no secret that Tony Stark took Morgan's education seriously.
Pepper said he maybe took it a little too seriously but Tony replied with, "There are only two levels of seriousness in this house. You're either serious or not at all."
And he was.
He had FRIDAY compile a list of suitable vocabulary the minute Morgan was born and auditorily bombarded her with target words before she could even talk.
("You want a glass of milk? I'll get the milk, honey. No need to be a cry baby about the milk. All you gotta do is ask for the milk," he said to the infant who was bawling her eyes out in her crib).
He also came up with a master list of appropriate gestures to use alongside previously mentioned vocabulary because it was very important to build both.
("What are you doing?" asked Rhodey, seeing Tony gesture for a drink at Morgan while asking if she wanted milk.
"Teaching her gestures. It's an important milestone and Morgan wants to reach it."
"Uh-huh, sure she does.").
When Morgan started talking, the first thing Tony taught her was to remember his and Pepper's names just in case she got lost and needed to tell someone who her parents are.
("Morgan, who's your mommy?" asked Tony.
"Pepper Potts."
Tony straightened his back with pride. "That's absolutely right."
"Now, who's your daddy?"
"Brad Fa-tuck." Even with the wrong pronunciation, Tony could tell she meant Brad Falchuk, as in Pepper's only celebrity crush.
Tony glared at his wife who sat unashamedly pleased beside him. He narrowed his eyes at her. She just hijacked his lessons.
"Yeah, your Mommy wishes," Tony muttered under his breath.)
He also taught her to ask security guards for help whenever she got lost. Talking to strangers was an absolute no-no, but talking to security guards when you can't find Mommy and Daddy was highly encouraged.
("This is necessary cause I don't know if you noticed but ever since she started running, she keeps getting lost in malls, Potts," Tony said to Pepper, the expression on his face telling her that he found something very suspicious about that. "One minute she's in front of you, and then you blink and she's gone."
Pepper laughed. "That's how things usually go when children learn to walk, honey. Soon she'll be moving out and getting married."
Tony's eyes almost popped out of their sockets. "I should build her her own house right beside ours. You know, so she has her own place but still close enough for me to keep an eye on her.")
Every Saturday morning, Tony and Morgan named and watered the plants they had in the garden. Sometimes he'd bring her to the store and let her choose what seeds to buy and plant.
("Mango tree, daddy!"
"Oh yeah I could go with some mangoes. How about strawberries, hmm? Just to rile up your mom. It's been a while.")
Morgan also helped him feed what farm animals they sheltered around the lake house. Tony's very proud of the fact that his daughter knows the difference between a goose, a swan, a duck, and an alpaca, but the alpaca wasn't really all that hard. He should get a llama to make it a challenge for Morgan.
("We can name it Kuzco!"
"We are not getting a llama. You can show her pictures of a llama or bring her to an actual farm to see a llama but we are not getting a llama." Pepper's tone booked no argument but Tony wouldn't be Tony if he didn't try.
"But Gerald could use a friend!")
Come bedtime, Tony would regale Morgan with very educational and instructional stories such as The Boy who Burned Eggs To Say Sorry, The Pepper and the Pot, and the Stark Kingdom.
("Tony, she's too young to know about the company's history," said an amused Pepper.
"But it makes for a perfect bedtime story! The kingdom that makes weapons, the Evil Stane, kidnapped prince, and the heroine who saves him." He pointed a finger at his wife, "That's you, by the way." Because Tony was merely the distraction while Pepper was the one with the will and drive to push the button to kill both her bosses. It was just by pure luck that Tony survived.)
And when Morgan turned four, Tony finally taught her how to make a phone call. 911 was the first number she memorized. Tony composed a whole song about it.
("9-1-1 is for emergencies," Tony sang while also showing Morgan the accompanying actions, " Like a fire, a bad guy, or injured bodies. When things go bad you press 9-1-1. Tell them what happened and help will come!"
"What the hell was that?" said Rhodey, cringing and looking like he wanted to fry his mind so as to forget the whole thing even happened.
"That is the next song to win a Grammy. FRIDAY did the arrangement. Wipe that look off your face or you'll hurt her feelings.")
The next numbers Morgan memorized were her parents'. It wasn't hard to get her to commit them to memory since she loved the feeling of having a phone pressed against her ear and dialing numbers. She had seen Mommy and Daddy on the phone dozens of times and now she can be on one too.
Tony really should have known it would backfire on him. Things had a habit of doing that.
...
"But Daddy said I have to call 9-1-1!" said Morgan, hands on her hips and staring her mother down like Morgan wasn't the one being lectured.
"For emergencies, sweetie," said Pepper, softly, her voice just barely betraying how amused she was. "A missing toy is not an emergency."
"What's going on here?" asked Tony, walking in from the study. "Aren't we fifteen years early in terms of mother and daughter disputes? She doesn't want to attend a concert on a school night, does she?"
Pepper folded her arms across her chest and Morgan mirrored her.
"Morgan, called the emergency hotline," Pepper explained.
"What was the emergency?"
"Sally's missing!" Morgan piped up.
"Yikes," Sally was the name of Morgan's Baby Alive doll. Tony came to stand beside Pepper, placing a hand on her back. His wife drops her arms by her side and leans in to him. "Please tell me she didn't call that in."
"She did," Pepper said with a sigh. "It's a good thing FRIDAY intervened. The operator was relieved that the baby in question wasn't a real baby."
Tony had to admit that he didn't see that coming. Didn't he define emergencies as life or death related? But he can't keep the proud look off his face because hey, his daughter just made her first emergency call!
Pepper caught the expression he was wearing and gave him a warning look of her own. "Fix this," she said.
Tony nodded curtly and then knelt in front of his daughter who was still a little put out that she got scolded for doing the right thing.
"Honey, you did a good job. You had a missing baby and you called 9-1-1, which is exactly what I told you to do. But," he emphasized, "9-1-1 doesn't apply to toys, okay? Mommy's right. Missing toys aren't emergencies. When you can't find them, you call Mommy and Daddy. Or FRIDAY. Emergencies only work for people, okay? Understand?"
Morgan nodded, her expression softening. "I'm sorry."
Pepper knelt down beside her daughter and planted a kiss on her head. "That's alright, baby. Life is confusing, I know."
"How about we play a game?" said Tony, glancing between Pepper and Morgan. "I'll give you a situation and you tell me who to call. If Mommy falls down the stairs who do you call?"
"9-1-1!" said Morgan.
"Good. What if you can't reach a toy because it's so so high up on a shelf? Who do you call?"
"Mommy! Because she's taller than you."
Pepper laughed and Tony bristled. "Yes, okay, fine. I'll let that slide. How about there's a bad man who wants to hurt you or take you away?"
"9-1-1!"
"Great job!" He gave her a high five and both parents stood up. "I think we're good here."
…
They were absolutely not good.
...
Tony's in the middle of sweet talking some European investors when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket.
He took it out, only with the intention of finding out who's behind the call and hitting ignore, when he saw the number behind it. It's the house's landline which means Morgan was calling.
He holds up a hand to the people in the room. "If you'll excuse me, ladies and only one gent, it's my daughter. This won't take long." He walked out of the room, phone to his ear.
"Hi, Daddy!"
"Hey, honey, what's up?"
"Can I eat a juice pop?"
"You called me to—yes, you can."
"'kay." She ended the call without so much as a goodbye.
Tony stared at the phone in his hands. "You're welcome," he said to the ghost of his daughter's voice.
He returned to the meeting and Morgan called five minutes later to ask if she could give the ducks some juice pops too.
…
Tony's in the middle of tracking old Stark weapons in the black market when Morgan called him up.
He wondered if she called Pepper just as frequently or it was only him who got this treatment.
"Hi, Daddy. Gerald doesn't want to play with me!" came her whine.
Tony watched as a shipment is being unloaded. "Have you tried giving him Mom's berries?" He whispered because he doesn't want to be overheard by the people he's tracking. And yeah he's got the external speakers turned off but he can't stop himself from whispering, anyway. (Old habits).
"Why you whispering?" Morgan asked, her own voice taking on a lowered volume as well.
"What? Oh. Cause daddy's, um, he's working." One of the dock workers turned around and Tony was grateful for Harley suggesting stealth mode all those years back.
"What you working on?"
"Uhhh a surprise." Tony decided to follow one of the dock workers.
"Like a surprise birthday party?"
"Something like that." One of the men just disappeared inside a warehouse. "Tell you what? If you get some of mom's berries and feed them to Gerald I'm pretty sure he'll play with you."
"But mommy says berries aren't for Gerald."
"I won't tell her if you don't. "
"I'm calling Mommy. Bye!"
"That's not a great idea!" Tony said but she had already ended the call.
Heading inside the warehouse, Tony gave FRIDAY a stern talking to about screening calls when he's on missions.
"You want me to block the little miss next time, boss?"
Definitely not. Blocking would lead to Morgan thinking she couldn't come to her dad for help with even the tiniest thing and Tony didn't want that.
"No, just... ask her what she wants before you transfer the call to me, alright? Especially when I'm in the middle of a bust." He paused and then decided it was better to ask now in order to be prepared. "What did she say to Pepper?"
"That you told her to feed Gerald the gojis."
"Ugh. I'm in so much trouble. Let's make this quick."
…
Tony was enjoying having Pepper in his arms, both of them swaying to the music that the live band was playing. The moment brought back a lot of memories, some of them shameful ones (because he did forget that he left her on the balcony so many years ago), but most of them happy because they haven't been on a date in a while.
His hand was on her bare back—because it's Pepper and she knew the kind of dress that could make him go weak at the knees—and she's currently giving him one of those looks that told Tony they're not going to make it to dessert, nor are they going to make it back home. Maybe he should book the nearest hotel room.
The car wouldn't do. He's planning on taking his time.
He's so engrossed on thinking about what he's going to do to her that he almost forgot they had a little girl and a babysitter waiting at home.
His phone rang in his breast pocket.
Almost.
Pepper smiled knowingly, reaching for his phone herself and putting it against his ear.
"Hi, Daddy! I'm bored."
"She's bored," Tony repeated for Pepper's sake. "I'm sorry to hear that. We didn't get the chance to book the greatest babysitter of all time. He's across country right now on a top secret mission for the Black Widow."
An idea came to him all of a sudden and Tony couldn't believe it took him this long. For a genius, he could be so absentminded at times.
"Tell you what. Write this down." He winked at Pepper as he started dictating Rhodey's number.
"You got all that?" he asked while Pepper shook his head at him and mouthing "you're impossible" at his face.
"Who's this number, Daddy?" asked Morgan, ever so innocently curious.
"That's Uncle Rhodey! Yeah, I think he's bored too. Go give him a call."
"Okay, bye!"
"You know he's going to call us, right?" Pepper giggled.
"Yeah, but he's gonna be on the phone with her. That's gonna take a while which leaves us with some alone time."
Pepper hummed thoughtfully, before closing the gap between them and kissing him on the mouth.
"And we need time," Tony said against her lips.
…
"Hands in the air, nobody move!" said Rhodey, the gun on his back was armed and ready to fire.
Then there was a ringing.
Coming from the suit.
"Hold on," said Rhodey, before putting his hand on his ear. "Hello?"
"Hi, Uncle Rhodey! It's me! Watcha doing?"