I changed the plot here and there. So it takes time to upload this.
Military officials from Survey Corps, Military Polices and Garrisons attended Levi's wedding. Levi was bored enough but still appreciated them. Levi glanced at Mikasa in a white dress without her wedding veil sitting boredly with no meaningful expression except whenever people came to congratulate them, Mikasa just smiled a little and give them a simple "Thank you."
Under the moonlight and garden lights, Mikasa Ackerman is indeed the prettiest woman, many guests say the same thing, even with her sitting there, boredly she's still pretty. Levi found Mikasa all night always looking towards the entrance of the churchyard, as soon as someone entered, Mikasa immediately sat upright to check the person who just came, followed by the same disappointed sigh, as if the person who appeared was not someone she has been waiting for a long time.
"Are you waiting for someone?" asked Levi.
Mikasa put her drinking glass on the table, without bother to look at Levi, "... Yes," she replied briefly.
"Is he not here yet?" asked Levi again.
"I don't think it's your business," she said. Levi raised both his eyebrows hearing the unfriendly tone from her.
"That's my business, like it or not - I have to know if you're still waiting for someone because we're going to get out from here," Levi replied. The girl grunted, turned her face away more from Levi.
"We can go. He's not gonna come."
"All right. We're going to go to Rose's wall, right there- "
"I don't care. Take me wherever you want, I don't care. All of you… are the same."
Levi frowns witnessing the girl's irreverence, but he doesn't want to think any further about that.
"We're leaving now," Levi said.
Mikasa Ackerman follows Levi, but they return to Yaeger's residence first to pack Mikasa's belongings and change her clothes. Along the way, in a horse-drawn carriage, silence accompanies them.
They arrive at Levi's residence in Rose, near Ragako and Dauper village just as the moon is exactly above their heads, Levi glances at his new young wife who momentarily pauses looking at her new home for the rest of her life, Levi couldn't say what Mikasa has in her mind. The girl's gaze, as usual, is always somber. Levi decides to go down first from the horse-drawn carriage, with Mikasa following him.
Levi turns his head towards Mikasa, while the girl looking around Levi's residence which is larger than Yaeger's, Levi moves his head towards his old castle, as if beckoning Mikasa to immediately catch up with him.
"This is where you're going to live," Levi said briefly. "Your belongings have been brought in by Mr. Buchwald."
Mikasa nodded.
"This is an old castle left by my ancestors, Utgard Castle. Mr. Buchwald takes care the farm, he lives nearby and comes every morning and evening. This is Mrs. Springer, she's the one I trusted to take care of this castle when I'm not around," Levi said.
"It's an honor for me to serve Captain Levi's family," said the middle-aged chubby woman smiling kindly towards them.
"I hope you treat them well." Levi said again.
"All right. "
"I'll show you your room," Levi said, walking ahead of Mikasa who followed behind him and go to the stairs. They arrived in a large room with a bed big enough for two people with large windows overlooking the airy hills with a balcony outside.
"You can rest," Levi said.
"Do you... stay here too?" asked Mikasa slowly.
"Yes, I do. I'm in the other room. My room is next to you if you need anything,"
"Thank you."
Mikasa closed the door and leaned behind it, she sighed long. The new life really begins, with completely a stranger.
While Levi walks towards his room, loosening his tie that strangle him all night. Opening his room that always feel empty as it could be, the large bed he never touch seemed to haunt him.
A beautiful night, isn't it?
-o-
"Captain, tell me you were joking," Connie says in disbelieve dropping his tablespoon in shock. Captain Levi and his new special operation squad are having lunch at headquarters in Trost District.
"You said you were just married yesterday," Armin said incredulously.
"What woman is married to you, Captain?" asked Jean.
"What kind of question is that, Jean?" Sasha said.
"Tch. You guys are so noisy," murmured Levi while sipping his tea, thinking that telling his team was unnecessary because he knew their reaction would be inconvenience for him.
Levi's Squad was formed and selected carefully by Levi, his long-time teammates who died in last expeditio left himself alone And Erwin offers him a new cadet as members of his new squad.
The new member of his squad is a 104th southern division cade who just graduated from military training a few years ago. Many senior cadet has passed away and there's only a freshmen cadets still remain in Survey Corps. They were selected carefully by Levi directly.
They are Sasha Braus who likes to eat a lot, she has her considerable intuition as a hunter, and then there's a sharp-mouthed Jean Kirstein with his outstanding thoughts in any situation with good physical abilities, Connie Springer is a little slow when it comes to brain compare to others but has a excellent fighting ability, Armin Arlert is the weakest boy among them, but he has a genius brain with his unexpected thoughts.
The four are now in shock and upset, as Levi announced that yesterday that he just got married without invite them.
"How could you get married without us around?" says Connie in disbelieve.
"I know! This was already planned by Captain Levi by sending us to guard at the frontier." said Jean .
"Women in my village who adore Captain Levi so much must be disappointed to hear this news!" squeals Sasha.
"I didn't know captain Levi decided to get married. I don't think you're the type of person to get married," Armin said.
"Indeed," Levi said.
"This is a matchmaking, for sure," Jean said again.
"Ah... it must be with the upper class women of Sina City." said Sasha, "You know the girls of Sina city act like they are a celebrity or something,"
"Really, Captain?" asked Connie.
"Actually she's from... Shiganshina District."
"You married a lower class women?" scorned Jean.
"Hey, Jean don't say that, Armin is from Maria," Sasha rebuked.
Armin simply smiled and nodded, "I am also from Shiganshina district. I know everyone in Shiganshina, what's your wife's name, Captain?"
Levi sighed, "Her name is..."
"You know what? It's not fair that only Armin knows Captain Levi's wife is. At least we need to get to know her!" said Connie.
"Yes! I need to know her!"
"Me too!"
Armin chuckles. While Levi sighed, "All right. But not for this week, we have a lot to do. You know the well in my house needs to be cleaned too."
Heard the last sentence, Connie and Jean' was the loudest to complain.
Before Levi departure this morning, he told Mrs. Springer that Mikasa doesn't have to wait for his arrival, because as a Captain in Trost District, Levi has many unscheduled jobs. He's glad at least Mrs. Springer accompanied Mikasa at the castle.
Now that it's almost midnight as he arrives at the castle, make sure his horse rests well Levi opens the castle's main door and finds the reading room that normally welcomes him in dark, now there's reflection of fire coming from the fireplace. He doesn't think that Mrs. Springer would stayuntil midnight, however the woman had family in her village.
Without a second thought Levi approached the reading room, in the middle of the room, the figure of his new wife stood as if welcoming his arrival with a book on her hand.
They stare at each other for a while, until Mikasa breaks the silence, "You're home," she says flatly. Her expression is still monotonous, but Levi can see how Mikasa's eyes are a little more somber than usual. She waited for him.
"I'm sure I have deliver my message clearly to Mrs. Springer that you don't have to wait for my arrival."
"I got your message. But you don't have to worry," Mikasa said tonelessly.
".…"
"About Mrs. Springer. I can take care of myself. If you think I need someone to take care of me, I don't need that. I'm capable of take care myself, undoubtedly."
"...I'm trying to understand your intention."
"What I am saying is..."
Mikasa nodded, "….you can send Mrs. Springer back to the farm, I do not need any companion in this castle. I'm comfortable with myself. Alone."
Levi nodded, "If that's what your wish for."
Mrs. Springer previously worked on hisfarm with Mr. Buchwald and took care of the castle whenever Levi's not around. But Mikasa's arrival at the castle makes Levi think that Mikasa - like any honorable girl out there- should have someone to help with her day. He never thinks that Mikasa could take care of herself alone in this big castle, however the Yaeger family despite from Shiganshina was an honorable family and has a notable name in society.
"Let's go upstairs. We need to rest. I'll take you to your room."
"I do not need - "
'You don't have to worry about anything. My job here is to protect you."
Mikasa nodded and walked a little behind Levi to the stairs, to her room.
"My team has a plan to visit us. They... want to see you, if you don't mind," Levi said carefully.
"Sure, I have to greet guests appropriately, right?" her voice sounds cynical, but Levi chooses not to reply it.
They… once again shrouded in silence until they reach the door of Mikasa's room.
"I can't say when exactly, probably around next week."
"I understand,"
"Good night," Levi said briefly. He got no reply as his wife shuts the door slowly.
-o-
Levi's squad plan to visit his castle had to be postponed several times. The Survey Corps are planning an undercover expedition. The next few nights Levi always come home in midnight and Mikasa doesn't wait for him anymore (not like she would). Today before Levi has a work to do in Sina Capital, Levi decides to go home right after sunset to inform Mikasa of his departure for a weeks, usually the moon just above his head as he enters the castle grounds.
When passing through the village, there are still many people who still do their night activities. Come to think of it, it's been four days since Levi really didn't talk and met Mikasa. Levi believes Mikasa must be fine and able to take care of herself in the castle, he also told Mrs. Springer to stock up the food Mikasa's and daily check her up. So Levi never worried.
Levi found the sound of plates and spoons from his dining room. He aware it's dinner time. Levi stepped towards to the dinning room, finding the dining room bright with candlelight and Mikasa Ackerman arranging the dining table.
"Ehem."
Levi doesn't mean to surprise her, but Mikasa startled when she finds Levi arrival -early than usual.
"You... surprised me." she said, try to look cool as usual after managed to calm herself with her monotonous face.
"I didn't mean that way,"
"You came home earlier than usual."
"Yes, I do. I would like to announce that I'm going to Sina Capital for a weeks."
Mikasa nodded, "All right," she said briefly, then sat down and started eating and Levi was still standing there watching her eat.
"If you're hoping to have dinner with me, you can't." she said flatly.
"...I didn't prepare anything for you," Mikasa continue in a cold tone without bother looking up to him.
Levi just blinked while standing there, in disbelieve. "I'm going upstairs," Levi said, turning his back without thinking about turn around and walking to the stairs, away from the dining room. He feels ridiculous to made his decision to come home early only to tell the girl about his departure during the week but only to get her extremely unpleasant attitude. Her obnoxious temper made everything clear; Levi didn't have to bother coming back here, the castle has never been a home to him from the very beginning.
"I don't even know what your favorite food is," murmurs Mikasa quietly seemingly aimed to herself.
Levi turned his back when he heard that, he doesn't understand. Something between them felt distant and it became a pain in the ass for him. The fact that she lives so close to him but her cold attitude always makes him to rethink to be near with her. Mikasa is nothing more than a stranger who happens to live in his house.
-o-
"Uncle, when will you stop smoking?" Levi asked his old uncle while the old man smoked his cigarettes in pleasure.
Kenny chuckles, "Until I die."
Levi snorts. His uncle's habits caused him headaches every time he visited Sina.
"Speaking of death. Uri told me that the doctor said he wouldn't be long, only about 3 months he's able to survive The Royals already prepare a will and everything if Uri leave in sudden."
"Isn't Doctor Yaeger have dealt with this kind of disease before?"
"They can't find Doctor Yaeger anywhere,"
"Hm." murmured Levi indifferently, he really didn't care about royal stuff.
"By the way, how's married life?" asked Kenny out of nowhere.
"Not you trying to give me a man's talk, Kenny."
"What? We can't have a man talk?" says Kenny incredulously.
Levi stares at him in contemptuous.
"Oh, come on. That girl is so pretty, you know," Kenny chuckles.
"Indeed, your marriage has been a talk in town." Trauten joins them.
"I don't care what the town says-"
'You know, there's nothing wrong with you getting married. Everyone deserve to live their life, deserve to earn their happiness including you, Shorty."
"Uncle, I can't. You know that."
" Really, Levi. I've been in a position like you,"
Kenny is now talking in serious tone "Have you ever heard about time heals people? That shits literally happened to me."
"Why did exactly you need to heal?"
Kenny startled, "Um…well… What I mean is… spend your marriage life like everyone does it" Kenny added.
"Kenny, you forced her into this marriage." Levi reminds him.
"Oi, Shorty, I gave you a solution to your problem, and you chose the solution I gave you. You're the one who made your choice and you are the one who dragged her into this. At least try to live normally, that's my point."
"Kenny I.… do not have the right to live a normal life. I'm different from you. You killed an unknown person. I killed my comrades out there."
"All right... Don't give me that deadly stare. I know… I know, you're different from me."
"I need to leave," Levi said, putting his teacups on and stands up.
"You see, Caven? He has an anger issues."
Trauten laughed, "No wonder where he gets it from."
"At least treat him well, Levi," Trauten said. Levi turned around, Trauten and Kenny looked at him seriously.
"If you decide to live the way you think, it's up to you. But treat her at least…well. It's not entirely Kenny's fault. You got her into this too, Levi. You don't have to share your misery with her," Trauten said.
Levi stares at his uncle's wife for a moment, he remembers last night when Mikasa indirectly refuse to have a dinner with him and how he can feel her resentment to him the way she talks and the way she looks up to him, as if all her misery was caused by Levi, which is true.
And how Levi deliberately busy himself with work until late, is the only reason of him to avoid for being home because of the her indignation demeanor. They're just too far from each other even to share their bitterness.
Levi sighed. "I understand. Thanks for the advice."
-o-
"I didn't know that... Commander Erwin is THIS tall and handsome closer." whispers Sasha to Connie, with her right hand on the chest saluting Commander Erwin followed by 4 Captains of the elite squad of Wall Rose. Special Squad Operation led by Captain Levi of Trost District, Captain Mike Zacharias of Chlorba District, Captain Nanaba of Nedlay District and Captain Hanji Zoe of Karanese District. The four are the leaders of each District in Rose, the Survey Corps along with the Garrisons are focused to fortify in Rose, to restrain any threat from Marley colony.
The Survey Corps and Garrisons each sent one captain with their Special Squad Operation member to supervise and guard each district in Rose and Sina. While 4 others District in Maria is guarded only by the Garrison regarding a fewer member of Survey Corps compared to Garrison and Military. While the Military Police Force was not included in the 57th expedition meeting because the Military Police only work in wall Sina to serve the King and Lords.
Those who are graduates of the top 10 are only allowed to join the Military Police Force. Despite the frequent number of cadets who died in the war against the Marley colony, the Survey Corps remained known as a symbol of humanity's freedom from Marley's colony and had the most elite cadets in military.
"I know, at our graduation, we saw Commander Erwin standing on the podium and I didn't expect him to be this tall," Connie whispered.
"I still can't believe we are selected as an elite squad for Levi's squad," Armin said.
"Hey, isn't that Bertholt and Reiner?" asked Connie, referring to Reiner Braun and Bertholt Hoover along with Marco Bott and Marlo Freudenberg who stood in salute to Captain Nanaba who then joined them.
"Ah.. I think they were chosen as Captain Nanaba's elite squad then," Armin replied.
"Were they assigned to Nedlay District in the North? Ah they are really lucky, it's the safest District of the Rose," Sasha said.
"The district is not an assurance for anything. You remember the last expeditions that were assigned forCaptain Levi's Squad and Captain Nanaba's? And you see the two squad members who were the most elite squads at the time were killed mercilessly by the Marleyans? It's just a matter of time we fated the same thing," Jean said.
"You just too pessimistic, Jean."
"We have the best leaders in history so far. Captain Levi, Hanji, Mike Zacharias, Nanaba, even from the Garrison we have a potential Captain Rico Brezenska, Ian Dietrich you named it- you see they are the strongest cadet ever known. We can win this war and lives in freedom!"
"Yeah but Captain Levi almost dead from the last expedition." whisper Connie, join the pessimistic Jean.
"I am not pessimistic. I'm being realistic, you remember Marley's technology when we guard the south frontier? Yeah, how come we win against them."
"But it all paid off with Captain Levi finally managed to take the southern port from Marley Colony, isn't?" asked Sasha again.
"But if you remember, weren't Reiner and Bertholt very ambitious to join Captain Levi's elite squad?" asked Connie.
"Yes, I do. Isn't that weird? Captain Levi didn't choose them, instead he chose us who ranked lower than them. They were 1st and 2nd rank."
"Captain Levi must have seen something of us so he chose us," Armin said.
"Still, it's weird,".
"You know what's weirder? All of us. We are all miraculously top 10 graduate cadets. Instead of choosing to join the Military Police, we're joining the Survey Corps. The only sane person is Annie Leonhart."
"That's right. Annie must have served the king directly considering she was ranked 3rd. Lucky girl," Sasha said.
"Armin, what kind of expedition do you think they're going to do?" asked Jean. "... I heard this was a secret expedition to sneak into the Marley area."
"They must have gone crazy. We don't even know how to cross the ocean."
All four of them saluted when Levi came up to them and sat next to his team. Then, Commander Erwin began his meeting.
"I want to thank everyone for coming here. As we know this is a big mission that I and Commander Pixis have been thinking carefully about." began Erwin.
"As we know, yesterday's 56th expedition has succeeded in bringing the victory of Paradis to take over the southern port from Marley Colony and we have lost our best comrades in order to regain our freedom. The name of our friends is: Dirk, Dieter, Marlene, Klaus and Harold of the Nanaba Squad who died to protect Levi's team. Oulo Bazard, Eld Gin, Gunther Schultz and Petra Ral failed in their duty to infiltrate the Marley area," Erwin said.
"Expedition 57, our main goal is to infiltrate the Marley region."
After the meeting, Levi spends a regular visits whenever he has free time, the place that comes to his thought first is not his castle, not Kenny's. But the public cemetery where the fallen soldiers were died and buried in war to defended their country in Sina Capital
Their hard work followed military training, their courage to fight against the Marley colony, their pride and beloved of their family, hope as heroes of the country... Now they're all the same, just lying lifeless rotting down there, where one day what left is only bones.
Levi always followed the pattern of his visits, from one gravestone to another... he never absent to visit his colleagues one by one who worked under him directly. And the last gravestone he visited was always the same one. The name on the gravestone, it used to make him know what it was like to feel loved for a second time. Now, that name only haunts him every night.
It's funny how one person from a different dimensions of time in the past and present can give a million mixed memories. Happy and sad - the two are inseparable like two different sides of a coin but hold together.
Levi knew this was a sin he endured for his dream. His grief in any deepest burrow cannot be matched evenly. Levi was too devastated for it, everyone nearby always left him behind.
Levi repeatedly regretted his decision to entrusted last expedition to his team. He should have been able to refuse the mandate Erwin entrusted to him, and perhaps now he can still guard Trost District together with those buried down there.
The name on the tombstone once gave a cheerful smile that seemed to continue to exist every day for the rest of his life, also promised to faithfully accompany Levi either as a subordinate, co-worker, or life partner - he remembers how the face was blushed in red when the women offered him to be a life partner, now that name only gives him nightmares every time he closes his eyes while sleeping. What an irony.
Levi had nightmares too often until he realized for himself that in reality he was living an endless nightmare for the rest of his life. Levi wished he had never known her from the beginning - never met Erwin and was recruited by him, joined the Survey Corps and didn't have to meet the her at all from the very beginning.
Petra Ral.
Whenever he read the name on the gravestone, Levi still wished deep down from his heart that he was only having nightmares that one day he would wake up, greeted by the girl's orange hair when opening his eyes, with her sweet smile, asking him:
"Captain did you have a bad dream?"
But Levi knew his life was just a long cycle of endless, hopeless suffering. He seemed cursed by what they said was luck - that his life was longer than those buried under his feet. The fact that they died because of his decision, makes Levi hate himself even more every day,.
Levi was too devastated to just hope to find happiness again, he was trapped, circling endlessly in his circle of suffering.
That was though, especially Levi's longing for Petra. i open to any review! :)