VIII.

Natsuki tore up and down the road on her motorcycle, coming at last to a coastal road, and a sea cliff. She pulled off of the road, parking her bike on the cliff.

She took off her helmet and set it on her bike, and looked out at the ocean, allowing her hair to flutter in the ocean breeze.

She closed her eyes, enjoying the soft warmth of the late summer sun.

"I wish you were here to talk to, Mom. Maybe you could help me make sense of this."

There was no reply, of course. Natsuki had been coming to this ever since she was sixteen and had gotten her motorcycle license. It was one of the many reasons why she had never believed in ghosts until recently. Four years of coming to the place where her mother had died, and never once meeting her spirit.

"So, I've got a best friend who's in love with me. I've got a ghost girl who's in love with me. And they want to start a relationship with me, together. And strangely, I'm sorta okay with that. Or maybe I'm not, 'cause while I'm definitely curious about…certain things…I'm also really messed up because I happened to walk in on Dad cheating on you. So…I have no idea what to do. It's not that I don't want to…to be with them. But I feel ill whenever I think about…sex…because I always flash to that image, and then I feel sick."

The only response she got was the whistling wind. She pulled out her phone and checked the weather, though she already suspected what she was going to find. Sure enough, there was a forecast for a typhoon to come through in the next day.

"Better get home," Natsuki sighed, "I guess…I always believed there was some sort of afterlife, or I wouldn't bother coming here to talk to you. I just wish that it allowed you to talk to me. I really miss you."

She strapped her helmet on, and then headed off down the road. She wasn't sure where she was heading, yet. It was still early in the day, and she had time before the storm reached them. She wasn't quite ready to return home. It wasn't that she was scared to return. She just felt like she still had cobwebs to clear.

~~*~~

Nao was not happy. In her mind, she can still see the shocked expression on Natsuki's face when she and Shizuru had kissed the young woman out of the blue. There was something infuriatingly adorable about Kuga's confused face, Nao decided. However, while she had long wanted to kiss Kuga like that, it had taken Fujino's interference in order for it to actually happen, and Nao wasn't sure that Kuga was as okay with it as she had said. But she wanted to be with Kuga, had wanted to be her lover for so very long. She'd been turned down once before, but had remained by Natsuki's side because of her unexpected willingness to remain her friend.

"That was actually a bit cruel of you, Pup," Nao looked a picture on her desk of her and Natsuki doing fireworks during a Festival, "To be near to you and not be allowed to love you the way I wanted. It may have actually been kinder if you'd told me to get lost. Of course, it's my own fault for thinking I'd be okay, staying by your side."

And she couldn't deny that Fujino inhabiting her body had allowed her to feel things on an even deeper level than before. But was that because she was feeling her own feelings and Fujino's at the same time, or was it because Fujino's love for Kuga just ran deeper than her own? Whatever the case, it was powerful, and Nao wanted more. She wanted to feel the fullness of every emotion. She wanted to hold Kuga to herself, soaking in the warmth of her flesh against her, she wanted to hear her cry out in ecstasy, and know that she was the cause.

But she also hated herself for that. Because she wondered, and not for the first time, if she was taking advantage of Kuga's confusion and feelings. And she hated herself all the more for not wishing to abandon her goals, despite her misgivings. She had loved Kuga from the moment the dark-haired girl had launched herself into that fist fight to defend her, ten years ago, and that had not diminished over the years. When Nao had made love for the first time, it had been Natsuki she had thought about, and not the girl in her arms at the time. None of her relationships had ever worked out, because either she or her lovers would figure out that they were not the person she'd wanted to be with.

And still, it had taken Fujino to make it even possible. And she hated that most of all, while still knowing it was her best and only chance to realize her dream.

"You're a madwoman, Nao," she sighed to herself, "I need to stop this before it gets started. I'll get the Pup a treat and apologize."

She stopped at a bakery, and purchased a few treats, and then headed out to find a cab. She was surprised to find Kuga on the street, riding her motorcycle.

"Nao?" Natsuki flipped up the visor on her helmet, "Do you need a lift?"

"Can we go back to your place?" Nao asked, "I need to talk to you and Fujino."

Natsuki shrugged, "Sure, hop on. But there's a typhoon coming, so if you're coming to my place, you're likely spending the night."

Nao nodded, "That's fine."

She tucked her box into the saddlebag on Kuga's bike, and then held onto Natsuki tightly as they raced up the hill to her home.

The wind was howling by the time they arrived, and they found Mai still there, talking with Shizuru.

"I wasn't sure when you'd be back," Mai said, "So I decided I'd make dinner for you. Mikoto joined me, too. She's taking a bath now."

"Hey, Tokiha, can you give the three of us a moment?" Nao asked.

Mai wiped her hands with a towel, "Sure."

She left the room.

"Kuga…I owe you an apology."

"Nao, I already told you…"

Nao raised her hand, "Not for the kiss. I told you once before that I love you, and I know you turned me down then, but I've still loved you. In fact, the fact that you still wanted to hang out with me, knowing that I thought of you that way, it made me love you more. And I wasn't honest with you about that. And I should have been. I'm sorry."

She inhaled sharply, then exhaled in a sigh, "What I proposed last night…wasn't fair to you. And I'm sorry to you, too, Fujino, for getting your hopes up. But…I can't…I don't want to hurt Kuga, so…"

Shizuru shook her head, "It is I who should apologize to you, Yuuki. I fell in love with Natsuki from the moment I first encountered her. I wish to be with her. But I did not consider her feelings on the matter, to my own shame. And there is more, but that is Natsuki's to tell, and not mine."

Natsuki sighed, "Before I do that, I wanted to tell the both of you that I'm open to the proposal from last night. I don't know what it is. Maybe the two of you woke something up with that kiss, last night. I want to be loved. I want to be held. I want someone to greet me with a kiss when I come home, or kiss me to wish me a good day when I leave the house. So, if the two of you are saying you want to step back from what you suggested last night, that's fine. But if you're still willing to try it, then so am I. But I need you both to be patient with me."

Natsuki explained about her childhood trauma to Nao, about being confronted with her father's philandering at an early age, and of how it had broken her family and her parental relationships, as well as leaving her with a deep-rooted fear of physical intimacy.

"It's not that I'm not interested," Natsuki concluded, "It's just that…any time I feel myself yearning for anything…sexual…I get nauseous, because I can't help but see Dad and his mistress."

Nao's mouth hung open in shock, "Damn, Pup. That's seriously messed up. And he just…left you to think about what you'd seen, didn't try to talk to you or anything?"

"Not even once."

"Is there anything we can do to help?" Nao asked, "And I'm not asking for our sake. I'm asking for yours. You shouldn't have to carry that with you."

Mai and Mikoto entered the room, "I have an idea that might help."

"Mai?"

"Listen, Natsuki, there's a huge bath in this house. Why don't we all bathe together?" Mai suggested, and then turned to the others and added, "With absolutely no talk about sex or intimacy!"

"How's that supposed to help?" Nao quirked an eyebrow, looking uncertain.

"No, I see Miss Tokiha's reasoning," Shizuru said, "A bath. Just a communal bath. We all sit, talk about our day. Just rest and get comfortable. Just sitting together in the altogether, we eventually would lose our timidity regarding our bodies."

"Well, one of us, anyway," Natsuki sighed, but gave them a sheepish smile.

"Then I'll go light some candles and we can all just relax in the bath after dinner," Mai said.

"Why candles?" Natsuki looked uncertain.

"Well, if the power goes out, we don't want to fall all over the place in the dark," Mai pointed out.

~~*~~

Dinner was a quiet and nervous affair, and then they all headed to the bath. The furo was indeed large, and Mai had ringed it with candles.

"Everyone turn your backs," Mai commanded in a voice that would brook no argument, "Natsuki, you can go ahead and get in first."

Natsuki quietly disrobed, then climbed into the water. She sat down and curled up on herself, resting her chin on her knees, and hugging her legs from under the knee, her feet pressed tightly against her bottom and together.

"I'm in," Natsuki said.

The others quickly disrobed and climbed into the furo, easing into place and relaxing.

Shizuru simply materialized in the water, sitting beside Natsuki.

"Wow," Mikoto said, "I never knew ghosts could take a bath!"

"Well, how do you expect them to keep those burial shrouds so shiny and white?" Nao quipped. That prompted a laugh from all present, even Natsuki.

"Pity we couldn't invite Midori," Mikoto said.

"Yeah, booze and hot water don't mix well, kid," Natsuki pointed out.

"Plus, I wouldn't have trusted her not to do skinship," Mai sighed, "Oh, sorry, Kuga."

"It's fine. I know what Midori is like," Natsuki gave a weak smile, "We've all been on the receiving end of her…fondling."

"Though Tokiha IS her favorite," Nao smirked at the other redhead.

"Well," Natsuki was surprised to hear herself speaking, "She does have more for Midori to hold onto than the rest of us."

"I guess none of you want dessert, tonight," Mai smirked.

"Ack! We take it back! We take it back!" Nao pleaded.

There was a good deal of talking and laughter, and Natsuki found herself relaxing a bit, until she was stretching out in the warm water with everyone else.

"Mou," Shizuru pouted, "I would offer to scrub Natsuki's back, but I fear that is outside of my powers, as a spirit."

"Hey, Kuga," Nao looked at the back in question, "What's that scar there, anyway?"

"Hmm?" Natsuki was leaning on her hands at the edge of the furo, and glanced back, "Scar? Oh! Um…That's from twelve years ago. July 20th. That was the day Mom ran off the road, and I almost drowned. The guy who dove in and pulled me out of the car had to cut the seatbelt off, and he nicked my shoulder. "

"Oh, damn, Kuga…" Nao blanched, "I'm sorry, I should have guessed it was something like that. I didn't mean to drag up any bad memories."

Natsuki turned to face her, smiling a bit, "I'm not made of glass, Nao. It was a long time ago. And, well, I'd rather have a bit of a scar on my back than be dead, right? Scars are just proof that something failed to kill you, after all. They're a testimony to survival."

Shizuru and Nao both smiled at that.

"Ara, but that is perhaps a very healthy way to think of it," Shizuru said, "And Natsuki is a survivor."

Just then there was a thunderclap that sounded as though it were coming from right outside. The lights flickered, and the whole of the room shook with the force of the burst. All of the young women let out a scream, and huddled together, until Natsuki realized that she was clinging to three other naked women, and that her arm was passing through the toned abdomen of a ghost. She let out another shriek, and leapt away.

"I think we can all get dressed, now," Natsuki said, shakily, "Before the storm blows the walls down around us."