Hi everyone! My username is Silenthunder, but you can call me Thunder for short. I am 20 years old.

I am a Baptist Christian, and I pray for any other members of this site who are also Christians. If anyone viewing this is one, PM me!

Important notice Regarding Reviews:

Ever since the first honest review from my site acquaintance and instructor, Lightning of the West (go check his stuff out if you haven't already), I would prefer it if anyone who reads my stories would leave honest criticism in their feedback. That means telling me what I need to fix as well as what's good. Thank you!

Upcoming Stories for Sometime in the Future:

TBD

Favorite Books and Series on this Site and off it (in no particular order):

Lord of the Rings series, by J.R.R. Tolkien

Redwall series, by Brian Jacques

The Scarlet Pimpernel, by Baroness Emma Orczy

Les Miserables, by Victor Hugo

The Chronicles of Narnia series, by C.S. Lewis

The Hiding Place, by Corrie Ten Boom

The Kingdom series and The Knights of Arrethrae series, by Chuck Black

The Call of the Wild, by Jack London

And many, many more...

And my absolute favorite is: The Bible, by God and other various authors through which He caused it to be written.

Favorite Musicals In No Particular Order,

And My Favorite Characters and Songs From Them In No Particular Order

Wicked - Nessarose (in Act 1), Fiyero (in Act 2), the Wizard (who comes from our world, so he represents Earth's twisted government. Yay!)

Defying Gravity Popular No Good Deed As Long As You're Mine

CATS - Jemima (her ethereal voice in the film blows me away every time), Mungojerrie, Rumpleteazer, Gus (hail one of England's finest late actors, Sir John Mills - he was 90 and half-blind when doing this part in the film! A true Bachelor Knight.)

The Phantom of the Opera - Meg, Erik (sometimes - it depends on whichever scene he's in), Raoul (again, it depends)

Music of the Night Masquerade Little Lottie/The Mirror The Phantom of the Opera

Matilda - Matilda, Ms. Honey, Bruce Bogtrotter, the Big Kids, the Trunchbull (because they have to have a man in a woman's costume play that part. Now that takes guts!)

Oliver! - Fagin (he does magic tricks during his first song! [At least in the one I saw]), The Artful Dodger (yes, he pickpockets for a living, but when I saw this musical, the boy playing him, Alec Fisher, did so well portraying a hilarious young rogue that you can't help but like him!)

My Fanfiction OCs:

Starlight Express:

Cole, a male mineral freight car (and a victim of C.B.'s villainous "hobby")

Maddie, a female medical railway car

CATS:

Calypso, a female street cat who's trying to find a better life

Warriors:

Silentflame, a she-cat and member of ShadowClan (my first OC, and unfortunately an Angst Mary-Sue created in my first fanfic that I will forever regret and learn from)

Other Warriors OCs for role-play sites that I've lost count of because of their sheer numbers

Fandom Stats I've Gathered About Myself:

Warriors Clan: ShadowClan personality-wise, ThunderClan geographically-wise

Warrior Cats Rank: Medicine cat apprentice

Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff

Best and Worst Hogwarts Classes: Care of Magical Creatures, and Divination (The only thing I dislike about the series is this class. My beliefs don't align well with the methods that Trelawny uses.)

Copy-and-Paste Section! Yay!

I solemnly swear to review every fic I read, no matter how old, young, stupid, lovely, amazing, retarded, or horribly written it is. This is for all of you that are tired of seeing 100 hits and only 14 reviews. I've joined the Review Revolution. Have you?

Join us and copy and paste this into your profile!

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you would rather see a Broadway show than go to an amusement park, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wished you could jump into a movie/book and smack a character for being so incredibly stupid, copy this into your profile.

Pluto was no longer declared a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was "Too small" and "Off its orbit" for a couple scientists. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!

If it amazes you how many times you think about a movie or musical, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive seconds...copy/paste this into profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

I prefer solitude over company. Copy and paste this in your profile if you feel the same.

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have your own little world, then copy this onto your profile, or else that little world will be destroyed by Fanfiction!

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do so at random moments, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you could own a library with every book you have ever wanted to read and or liked/loved (and often dream about it), copy and paste this on to your profile and add yourname to the list: Italiangurlinmessedupworld, the epitome of randomness, Holly Marie Fowl, Stefanlover12, -I-Luv-Tugsy, musicgal3, Misterfleas, Fantasia-the-Crazy, Mistosingsmore, NyokaDelFanfiction, MacavityManiac, Glee10, Silenthunder

If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you spend hours reading, writing, or both, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have an unhealthy obsession with reading books and fanfiction, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever wondered who made up all the 'copy this into your profile' thingies then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you get angry that not all of the copy-and-paste things have proper puncuation, copy and past this onto your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If your part of the .0000000001 percent of people who does NOT have a MySpace, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like singing songs at random points in the day, copy this into your profile.

If you don't care about Facebook, because Fanfiction is way cooler, copy/paste!

If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

Teenage girls who are NOT in love with Edward Cullen and Jacob Black or had their minds poisoned by Justin Bieber or One Direction are quickly becoming an endangered species. If you are part of this endangered species, copy and paste this in your profile. Do it… DO IT NOW!

This is the stupid test! 100 stupid things that people do! Bold the ones that apply to you!

1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails
3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand (not necessarily in my hand, but somewhere just a freaking obvious)
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name (I've called my Mom 'Dad' my Dad 'Mom' and etc.)
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle.
23. Have run into a closed door
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard, etc.
39. Walked into a pole, tree, etc
40. Wore two different earrings, shoes, etc by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil or pen
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. Looked into an overhead light purposely while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. Have ever laughed at a joke or movie that no one else thought was funny
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one or because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out.
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Stepped on a step that wasn't there
91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them
93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper
94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours
95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs
97. You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling.
99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class
100. Have popped a balloon in your mouth.

Results: I bolded 41.

(I accidentally deleted #13: Have gotten gum stuck in your hair. This also happened to me once, even though I do not like nor eat gum at all.)

"All that is gold does not glitter,

Not all who wander are lost.

The old that is strong does not wither,

Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

From the ashes a fire shall be woken,

A light from the shadows shall spring.

Renewed shall be blade that was broken,

The crownless again shall be king."

Put this in your profile if you will always be a Lord of the Rings fan!

If you've ever wanted to give a movie or show character a flyingtacklehug, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're in denial over Tonk's and Remus Lupin's deaths, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do at random moments, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If it amazes you how many times you think about a movie or musical copy and paste this on your profile.

If yuo've evar furrgoten hauw 2 spel an eezy worrd, copy and payste this inntoo yuor profyle.

If you've ever had random loud singing outbursts in public, copy this into your profile.

-27 publishers rejected Dr. Seuss's first book, To Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street.

-R. H. Macy failed seven times before his store in New York City caught on.

-Charles Schultz had every cartoon he submitted rejected by his high school yearbook staff. Oh, and Walt Disney wouldn't hire him.

I wish to see Aslan shake his mane,

To help destroy Isildur's Bane,

To soar high upon a dragon's back,

To sail the seven seas with Captain Jack,

To take lessons with Professor Dumbledore,

To fight in battles until evil's no more.

All this I wish to do and see,

If I could just escape reality.

-Maethorelen

Post this on your profile if you want to escape reality!

YOUR GUY SIDE:

You love hoodies.

You love jeans.

Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night.
TOTAL: 9

YOUR GIRL SIDE:
You wear lip gloss/stick.
You love skirts.
Cats are better than dogs.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
Pink, yellow, orange, purple or gold is one of your favorite colors.
You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the shopping centre.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body perfume.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like being the star of everything.
TOTAL: 7

In Honor of Stupid People

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time? Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief!)

A good friend tells you when you're acting crazy. A best friend will tell you and then join you in your crazy act. Copy and paste this into your profile if you have a best friend.

If you don't see how it is possibly possible that someone could not LOVE the Phantom of the Opera as soon as they are introduced to it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you can not imagine what you did before you knew about Phantom of the Opera and Fanfiction even if it was less than 3 months ago, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are against discrimination of any sort, copy and paste this in your profile.

If Fanfiction to you is what Facebook is to other people, copy this to your profile.

If you have/had a scary crush on a book, anime, or game character, then copy and post this into your profile.

Less than 1 precent of teenages don't use make-up. Are you one of those who don't? BE PROUD AND GLUE THIS THING IN YOUR PROFILE!

How To Be Annoying:

• Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way".

• Drum on every available surface.

• Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

• Staple papers in the middle of the page.

• Ask 800 operators for dates.

• Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copy warnings.

• Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks & purses.

• Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

• Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

• Specify that your drive-through order is "for here".

• Set all alarms in the house for random times.

• Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."

• Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off.

• Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.

• Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise. (I have done this. It was fun!)

• Honk and wave to strangers.

• Dress only in clothes colored neon orange.

• Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

• Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.

• Wear your pants backwards.

• Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.

• Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"

• Rouse your roommates from slumber each morning with Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music".

• Leave someone's printer in compressed-italic-cyrillic-landscape mode.

• ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

• only type in lowercase.

• dont use any punctuation either

• Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

• Pay for your dinner with pennies.

• Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

• Repeat everything someone says, as a question. (And this.)

• Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.

• Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now." (I tried this once and failed epically.)

• Light road flares on a birthday cake.

• Wander around the restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

• Leave tips in Bolivian or other random currency.

• Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador".

• Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

• At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

• When Christmas carolling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.

• Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One".

• As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

• Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

• Finish the 99 bottles of beer song. (I did this with my siblings, except it was Coke rather than beer.)

• Sing the "This is the song that never ends..." song. (Ya know it, don't ya?)

• Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

• Pretend your mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

• Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up", and repeat.

• Drive half a block.

• Name your dog "Dog".

• Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

• Ask people what gender they are.

• Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

• Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.

• Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern Drawl.

• Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot".

• Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".

• Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

• Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as "Feliz Navidad" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.

• While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

• Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

• Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

• Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

• Change your name to John Aaaaasmith for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each A.

• Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

• Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

• Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

• Wear a LOT of cologne.

• Ask to "interface" with someone.

• Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing".

• Sing along at the opera.

• Mow your lawn with scissors.

• At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batatatatatata-suhWING-batter!"

• Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy". (I've done this as well. It was hilarious!)

• Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend".

• Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

• Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles".

• Incessantly recite annoying phrases, such as "sticky wicket isn't cricket."

• Stare at static on the tv and claim you can see a "magic picture".

• Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

• Scuff your feet on a dry, shaggy carpet and seek out victims.

• Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

• Never make eye contact.

• Never break eye contact.

• Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

• Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.

• Construct your own pretend "tricorder", and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.

• Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal voice.

• Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

• Make appointments for the 31st of September.

• Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

WHAT TO DO IN AN EXAM YOU KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO FAIL ANYWAYS:

1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"

2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.

4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.

5. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.

6. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min.

7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.

8. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.

9. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

10. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.

11. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.

12. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (i.e. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink.)

13. Show up completely drunk (completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).

14. Comment on how handsome/pretty the instructor is looking that day.

15. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.

16. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.

17. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.

18. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.

19. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave.

20. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, then cough. Repeat if necessary.

21. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who are you? Where's the regular guy?"

22. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!

23. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.

24. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "The light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"

25. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.

26. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.

27. In the middle of the test, have a friend rush into the classroom, tag your hand, and resume taking your test for you. When the teacher asks what's going on, calmly explain the rules of Tag Team Testing to him/her.

28. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."

29. Stand up after about 15 minutes, and say loudly, "Okay, let's double-check our answers! Number one, A. Number two, C. Number three, E..."

30. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. Strike a pose first for added effect.

31. Tailgate outside the classroom before the exam.

32. Bring a giant cockroach into the room and release it on a girl nearby.

33. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.

34. Bring one pencil with a very sharp point. Break the point off your paper. Sharpen the pencil. Repeat this process for one hour.

35. Make Strange noises... get people to stare... look at the person next to you as if he/she did it.

36. Dress like the professor.

37. Use Invisible Ink to answer the whole exam.

38. Order catering. The catering company should come in about halfway through the test, and should include at least three waiters, eight carts of food, and five candelabras.

If this made you crack up copy and paste!

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity:

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
8. Dont use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...Copy and Paste this into your profile!! Whee, insanity is FUN!

Someone out there either has too much
spare time, or is really good at Scrabble.

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION - RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

Serious Stuff:

If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile, and don't just ignore this because in the Bible it says, ‘If you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.'

Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...

He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...

He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...

He had no army, yet kings feared him...

He won no military battles, yet he conquered the World...

He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...

He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today

Feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us...

If you believe in God and Jesus Christ his Son

then copy and paste this in your profile

If you ignore him, in the Holy Bible, Jesus says...

" If you deny me before man, I will deny you before my Father in Heaven..."

Why do we ((sleep)) in church, But stay ((awake)) through a 2 hour movie? Why is it so ((hard)) to talk about God, but so ((easy)) to Gossip? Why are we so ((bored)) when we look at a Christian magazine, but find it ((easy)) to read Playboy? Why is it so easy to ((ignore)) a Godly Facebook Wall Post, Yet we ((repost)) the nasty ones? Why are ((churches)) getting smaller, But ((bars and clubs)) are growing? Think about it, are you going to repost this? Are you going to ignore it, cause you think you'll get laughed at? Would You Have Read This if it Said... Read This In God's Name.

80 percent of you won't repost this.

Jesus Christ said: "If you deny me in front of your friends I will deny you in front of my father."

The one who smiles the most is the one who's the most broken.
The one who fights the most is the one who wants to find peace.
The one who encourages others is the one who always feels useless.
The one who seems insane is the one who is just following a life no one else understands, or will ever believe.
Nor do they want to.
Not everything is as it seems. Remember that.

Mommy

I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If your against abortion, or if you almost or did cry reading this repost this on your profile.
If we want to stay United, like we claim, abortion has to be stopped...
Save another voice...because that next voice might be able to save us all...

Copy and paste this poem in your profiles if you are against child abuse:

My name is Sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry.
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Murdered me.
IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN (And was balling your eyes out) YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART.

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
He told his friends that it was cool
And when he pulled the trigger back
It shot with a great crack
Mummy I was a good girl
I did what I was told
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold
But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye
I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry
When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another
And all because he got the gun from his older brother
Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much
And please tell Nick, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush
And tell my little sister that she is the only one now
And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best
Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest
Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class
And never to forget this and please don't let this pass
Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this
Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss
And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try
I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry
Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest
But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest
Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack
Mummy listen to me if you would
I wanted to go to college
I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with daddy
On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married
I wanted to have a kid
I wanted to be an actress
Mummy I wanted to live
But mummy I must go now
The time is getting late
Mummy tell my Nick
I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date
I love you mummy I always have
I know you know it's true
Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you"
In memory of the Columbian students that were lost
Please if you would
Pass this around
I'd be happy if you could
Don't smash this on the ground
If you pass this on
Maybe people will cry
Just keep this in heart
For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye"
Now you have two choices
1) repost and show you care
2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart
(Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care)

I Went to a Party Mom,

I went to a party, And remembered what you said. You told me not to drink, so I had a sprite instead.

I felt proud of myself, The way you said I would, that I didn't drink and drive, though some friends said I should.

I made a healthy choice, And your advice to me was right. The party finally ended, and the kids drove out of sight.

I got into my car, Sure to get home in one piece. I never knew what was coming, Mom, something I expected least.

Now I'm lying on the pavement, And I hear the policeman say, the kid that caused this wreck was drunk, Mom, his voice seems far away.

My own blood's all around me, As I try hard not to cry. I can hear the paramedic say, this girl is going to die.

I'm sure the guy had no idea, While he was flying high. Because he chose to drink and drive, now I would have to die.

So why do people do it, Knowing that it ruins lives? And now the pain is cutting me, like a hundred stabbing knives.

Tell sister not to be afraid, Mom Tell daddy to be brave. And when I go to heaven, put ' Daddy's Girl' on my grave.

Someone should have taught him, That it's wrong to drink and drive. Maybe if his parents had, I'd still be alive.

My breath is getting shorter, Mom I'm getting really scared These are my final moments, and I'm so unprepared.

I wish that you could hold me Mom, As I lie here and die. I wish that I could say, I love you and goodbye.

If your against Drinking and Driving, Copy and Paste this to your Profile

A 15 year old girl holds hands with her 1 year old son. People call her a slut. No-one knows she was raped at 13. People call a girl fat. No-one knows she has a serious disease which causes her to be over weight. People call an old man ugly. No-one knows he had a serious injury to his face while fighting for our country in the war. Repost this if you're against bullying and stereotyping. 95% of you won't.

Dear bullies,

See that boy doing his homework in homeroom? Last night he talked his friend out of suicide. See that girl you just called fat? She is starving herself. See that old man you made fun of cause of the ugly scars? He fought for our country. See that young boy you must made fun of for always being sick? He has to walk home in the snow cause his family is too poor. See that girl you made fun of for wearing lots of make-up? You bullied her for being ugly without it too.

Re-Post this if you are against bullying. I bet 95% of you won't. Your life would probably not be as harsh as theirs!

The girl you just called fat? She is overdosing on diet pills. The girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting makeup on hoping people will like her. The boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home. See that man with the ugly scars? He fought for his country. That guy you just made fun of for crying? His mother is dying. Put this as you're profile if you're against bullying. I bet 95% of you wont put this on your profile, but I'm sure the people with a heart and backbone will.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''

My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''

"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me! I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose. My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart.

If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile.