Chapter 116
Having a baby in the house meant that Clarke rarely ever woke up feeling truly rested. Because even on those nights when Avery would sleep the whole night through, Clarke would still hear things on her phone, just little sounds she made in her sleep, and the motherly part of her just had to wake up whenever she heard anything. So it came as a total surprise to her that, the day after attending therapy with Bellamy, she woke up feeling like she'd gotten the best night's sleep she'd had in a year. She stretched as she rolled over and found that he was already awake and sitting up, doing his breathing.
"Hey," she said.
"Hey." He put a pause on the meditation and lay back down again, on his side so he could face her.
"Did you sleep well?" she asked him.
"Yeah, I slept through the night," he answered. "Except when I woke up to cover you up again."
"You always do that," she said.
"Gotta keep you warm."
As much as she appreciated the blankets, there were some other things that could keep her even warmer. Such as . . . body heat? Of course, that always worked best whenever they didn't have any clothes on.
Before her mind could wander too far into the gutter, she reminded herself that this was going to be another big day for him, and she wanted to see how he was feeling about it. "So are you excited to go back to practice today?" she asked.
"Yeah," he said. "I wanna see those guys, thank them for standing up for me. Whip them into shape before our first playoff game."
She felt like it'd be good for him to be able to work again, although she hoped it didn't throw too much of a wrench into his existing routine. "I bet Miller's gonna be glad to have you back," she said.
"Oh, yeah, I think he's goin' kinda crazy doin' it all on his own."
"High schoolers are enough to drive anyone crazy," she said. "Listen to me. I say that like I wasn't one just a few years ago."
He chuckled and moved a bit closer so that his legs were touching hers beneath the covers. "Thanks for coming with me yesterday," he told her.
"Thanks for having me," she said. "It was . . . really therapeutic for me, too." Although she didn't feel like it was necessary for her to go see Dr. Wallace on a regular basis like he was, she wasn't opposed to going back again. "I was thinking," she said, "maybe I could keep going with you sometimes? Not every session, but maybe just once a month?"
"Yeah, absolutely," he said. "I think that'd be good for us."
It really would be, wouldn't it? Maybe some other couples were too embarrassed or stubborn to get any counseling together, but not her and Bellamy. Anything that would make them stronger, they were willing to do it. "Mmm," she moaned as his feet began to rub hers beneath the covers. "I don't wanna get up yet. I feel like I could lay in this bed all day."
"You want to? Let's do it," he offered.
"We can't. I have a house to clean, and you have a job to do, and we have a baby to raise," she reminded him. She was pretty sure this was what her parents had always referred to as the 'real world' when she'd been growing up. But to her, since things had gotten real at a young age, it was more like . . . adulting.
And speaking of adulting . . .
"What about tonight, though?" she suggested quietly, finding herself distracted by the way his biceps looked underneath the sleeves of his t-shirt. "Maybe we could spend some time in this bed tonight." No need to be subtle about it, she figured.
This intrigued glint appeared in his eyes, and he questioned, "How much time?"
"A lot," she replied flirtatiously. She specifically recalled some weekends in high school when they'd spent most of the whole damn day getting it on. Now that she was older, two or three hours would definitely suffice.
"Are you saying you wanna have sex with me again?" he concluded.
"Yeah." She had no problem just openly admitting it. Nearly two months without sex had left her feeling mighty thirsty. "If that's what you want," she made sure to add. If he still felt like they needed to take it slow, then she was more than willing to. She'd just have to charge up her vibrator or something, because honestly . . .
"Oh, it's what I want," he assured her quickly. "It's what I always want."
"Good," she said, feeling like they were on the same page. She waited for him to say something else about it, but instead, he just reached out and threaded his fingers through her hair lovingly. "What?" she said, laughing lightly.
"I was just remembering the first time you asked me to sleep with you," he said.
"Oh, yes, that was very bold of me."
He grinned. "It was hot as hell. My girl knew what she wanted."
"I wanted to not be a virgin anymore," she recalled. "To be honest, you kinda walked in the gym at just the right time, otherwise I might've asked someone else."
"So I was convenient?" he summarized.
"Pretty much. But also . . . unfairly good-looking."
"Unfairly," he echoed, smirking.
"Oh my god, imagine how mortified I would've been if you'd said no." She felt embarrassed just thinking about the possibility. That whole attempt could have really blown up in her face.
"I wasn't gonna say no," he said. "Let's be honest: I hardly ever said no to anyone. And I always thought you were cute, so . . ."
"Really?" She'd always been under the assumption that he hadn't paid much attention to her when she'd just been a freshman.
"Yeah. You still are, by the way," he said. "Cute and gorgeous and . . . sexy." He moved even closer to her, virtually eliminating all space between them, and whispered, "My smoking hot sexy wife," as he rolled her onto her back and got on top of her. He kissed her lips, then tilted his head so his mouth could latch onto her neck and press a hot kiss to her pulse point.
"Even after having a baby?" she wondered.
"Especially after that." He sat up a bit, tossed the covers aside, and said, "Just look at your body," as he gazed down at her in awe. "Your curves." He cupped one of her breasts, then trailed his hand down her sides, over her waist and hips.
"Oh, it was already hard to get out of this bed," she said, looping her arms around his neck, pulling his face closer to hers. "Now it just seems impossible." They kissed again, the kind of kiss that flowed straight into another one, and another, and another. The sex would still have to wait until tonight, but for now, a morning make-out seemed like a great way to start the day.
...
It was such a parent thing to have a night of sex planned, but the upside of scheduling it in advance was that Clarke was able to make sure everything was ready for it. Bellamy had warned her that he'd probably be up at the school all day getting caught up on things related to his team, so that gave her the chance to pull some stealthy ninja moves and get things set up on her own. First, she changed the sheets, even though she'd probably just have to change them again afterward, and she arranged some candles around the room just like he had that one night. That one night where she'd ended up having a breastfeeding breakdown instead of getting horizontal with him. The candles had created a really romantic ambiance, though, so she wanted to recreate the vibe.
Of course, a woman could not plan a romantic evening without considering which lingerie she was going to be wearing for her husband. Her options were a little limited, but something from Amazon did show up on her doorstep right on time that day, so she tried it on, spent way too much time looking at her reflection in the mirror, and deduced that Bellamy would love it. Then again, Bellamy wasn't picky. He'd say she looked pretty whether she was wearing lingerie or a potato sack.
It wasn't until that afternoon that she realized she was missing something very, very important, so she made a quick run to the pharmacy and bought some condoms. Although she had some at home, they weren't Bellamy's size. Too small. They'd been the ones Finn would use, and . . . ugh.
Once the condoms were in the nightstand drawer, she felt like she was ready to go. Ready and excited. And eventually frustrated with waiting. Bellamy didn't get home until 6:00, and they had to eat dinner before they could do anything else. Plus, there was the fact that Avery was still awake, so until she was ready to go to bed, they couldn't exactly go to bed with each other. They both played with her a lot, though, eventually tiring her out.
"Alright, I'm gonna go put Avery down now," she decided once their daughter started to yawn.
"Should I do the dishes or anything?" Bellamy asked, motioning to the small pile in the sink.
"No, let's just leave 'em 'til tomorrow," she said.
"Kay," he said, bending down to start picking up some of Avery's blankets and toys. "You want me to come up then?"
"No, just wait down here," she told him. "I'm gonna change into something a little sexier."
"Ooh."
"And then . . ." She trailed off.
"And then." He just grinned.
Fuck. Yes, she thought, already feeling like her insides were tingling. This was long overdue.
As she lay Avery down in her crib that night, she said, "Alright, baby girl, you're all set to have one of your really super quiet nights, right?" She'd do her parental duty if she had to, no doubt about that, but it would be really nice not to have any disruptions. "No crying. No interrupting Mommy and Daddy while we do . . . Mommy and Daddy things. Just nine to ten hours of solid sleep. Think you can manage that?"
Avery looked up at her and just sort of . . . smiled. Almost mischievously.
"Look, give me seven to eight, and that'll be fine," Clarke bargained. As if she agreed to that, Avery's eyes started to close.
Clarke wasted no time getting dressed after that. Well, first getting undressed. The lavender baby doll dress she ended up putting on could barely be classified as clothing. It was short, barely passing her hips, and very sheer, so Bellamy would be able to see the matching thong she was wearing underneath. There was some lace at the top on the cups, but those weren't doing much to hold her breasts in. She felt like she may as well be wearing water, because fabric was a generous term for that outfit, but it looked good on her; and it definitely made her feel sexy.
Eyes trained on her reflection, she took a deep breath as she felt a sudden, unexpected wave of nerves. It wasn't like this was her first time or anything. Certainly wasn't her first time with Bellamy. They'd done this hundreds of times before, yet here she was, still feeling like it would be something new.
...
Clarke lay in bed in her dorm room, trying to wrap her mind around what she'd just done. Sex with another girl was definitely . . . new.
"So did you enjoy that?" Lexa asked, letting the sheet fall from her chest as she sat up.
"Yeah, it was great." She'd felt a little self-conscious at first, because she was used to giving blowjobs, not eating someone out. But Lexa had definitely seemed . . . satisfied.
"Girls always do it better," Lexa said with a smirk. "Not that I have anything to compare against. Do you?"
Little did Lexa know, the only other sexual partner she'd had was basically the person who had taught her how to go down on girls. She'd definitely tried to channel her inner Bellamy and mimic the things he did when he was down there. "Yeah," she admitted, trying not to compare. Lexa was amazing in bed, too. They'd both gotten off on this, so as far as sexual encounters went, it was definitely in a high tier.
"Am I the first girl you've ever slept with, though?" Lexa asked.
"You're the second person I've slept with," Clarke told her. "Ever."
"Seriously? No way," Lexa said in surprise. "I would've thought you were way more experienced."
"Well, I am . . . experienced," Clarke said. "I've done a lot, just . . . not for a couple years." Here she'd been already resigning herself to another year of masturbation when she'd sat down next to this beautiful girl in English class. They'd hung out a few times, talked for a couple of weeks, and now . . .
"Well, I'm glad I got to be one of your firsts," Lexa said. "Have I swayed you over to my team completely?"
Clarke laughed. "No, I'm still bi."
Lexa shrugged. "That works for me." She climbed over Clarke, got out of the bed, and strode over to Clarke's desk without a stitch of clothing on. She looked so confident and so at ease, and Clarke envied her for that. Meanwhile, she couldn't do more but sit up in the bed, clutch the sheets to her chest, and grapple with the fact that, not only had she slept with a woman for the first time, she'd also slept with someone besides Bellamy. And she didn't feel guilty about that. No, she couldn't. God only knew where he was even living anymore, and hell, she was a freshman in college now. If there was any time to experiment with things and get more in touch with who she really was, then now was that time.
"Who's in all these pictures?" Lexa asked as she surveyed the various frames set up around Clarke's laptop.
"Oh, mostly some friends," Clarke replied.
Lexa picked up a picture of Clarke with Raven and said, "I've seen this girl around, I think."
"Yeah, she goes here. That's Raven," Clarke informed her. "She's not bisexual, so don't get your hopes up."
"Darn." Lexa pouted. "What about your roommate?"
"Harper? Not that I know of." They'd only been roommates for four weeks now, so she could only assume that given how much time Harper spent gushing about male celebrities.
"Is this the ex-boyfriend?" Lexa asked, picking up another picture.
"No, that's Wells. He's just a good friend," Clarke said. She kind of missed that kid; he'd always just sort of been there for her in high school, never pushing the boundaries or making things uncomfortable, even though Clarke had no doubt that, if she were to call him up right now and ask him out on a date, he'd say yes. "What makes you so sure I had a boyfriend anyway?" she asked Lexa.
"You said you were experienced. Although I guess that doesn't have to mean . . ." Lexa set the photo back down and said, "You know what? Whoever taught you and however they taught you, they did a damn good job, because I thoroughly enjoyed myself."
Clarke smiled a bit uncomfortably. Lexa probably thought she was being lighthearted, but even little things like that just made Clarke's heart feel heavy again.
Lexa looked at the pictures stuck to the mini-fridge next, and her eyes seemed to go straight to the one where Clarke was in her high school graduation gown. "These your parents?" Lexa assumed.
"Yeah." Sadly, that was the only recent picture she had of the three of them together, and it was a horrible one of all three of them. None of them were smiling or even looked happy to be standing together, because it had all been so awkward.
"So you got that whole cozy family vibe goin' on, huh?" Lexa assumed.
Clarke shook her head. "Not exactly." She couldn't believe her parents had been apart for a year and a half now. For that first year, she'd held onto hope that they would somehow end up back together, but now, she knew better than to delude herself. Too much time had passed. The chances of any couple reuniting after so much time apart were slim to none. "They wouldn't have posed for that picture if I wasn't standing in between them," she told Lexa. "They're divorced."
"Oh." Lexa looked like she was cringing inwardly. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay." Harper had kind of put her foot in her mouth when they'd first met, too, when she'd asked Clarke where her dad was on move-in day.
Lexa came back over to the bed and sat down on the foot of it. "My parents never got married. They just shuffled me back and forth when I was a kid," she revealed, rolling her eyes. "Got so fed up with it, I got emancipated when I was sixteen."
"Oh, wow." Clarke couldn't imagine living on her own at that age. As much as her parents had annoyed her with their protectiveness back then, they'd also put a roof over her head. And a pretty nice roof at that.
"Best decision I ever made," Lexa proclaimed. "Neither one of them could handle me being a lesbian."
"Neither one?" That didn't make Clarke feel too confident about her own coming out.
"Nope." Lexa sighed, shrugging helplessly. "What can you do, right?"
Clarke had never really considered the thought that coming out as bisexual could possibly put an end to her relationships with her mom and dad. She didn't think it would, but still, they were both on the more conservative side of the political spectrum, so she didn't picture it being smooth sailing.
"What about your parents?" Lexa asked. "Do they know you're bi?"
"No." To this day, Bellamy was still the only person she'd told, although both Raven and Harper had to be suspecting something since she'd been spending all this time with Lexa lately. "No, I haven't told them yet. I will, eventually, but I know they're gonna freak out."
"That sucks," Lexa sympathized. "Parents are pretty crappy. Not all the time, I guess. I've heard rumors of good ones that exist, but sometimes I think they're like unicorns."
"Yeah," Clarke agreed. "I guess my parents are still pretty decent, though. I probably shouldn't complain."
"Maybe I shouldn't, either," Lexa said, though by all means, her upbringing definitely sounded like it'd been rougher than most. "My mom tried her best. But she was so young when she had me."
Against her better judgment, Clarke asked, "How young?"
"Like sixteen."
Her breath caught for a second. Sixteen.
"Got knocked up in high school, just like people always said she would," Lexa went on. "I guess I'm just lucky she didn't have an abortion, because then I wouldn't even be here."
Oh my god, Clarke thought, wracking her brain from an escape from this particular conversation. It'd just taken a really sharp turn really fast. And once again, Lexa couldn't possibly have any idea that she was bringing up something so haunting and so sensitive.
"Hey, Lexa?" Clarke said.
"Hmm?"
"Let's . . . not talk anymore," she suggested awkwardly. She liked this girl, but nowhere near enough to confide her secrets in her just yet. Maybe not ever.
"Fine by me," Lexa said, smirking as she climbed back on top of Clarke and kissed her. And just like that, conversation over, and Clarke could relax again.
...
"Don't be nervous," Clarke whispered to herself. In a way, she need to approach this whole night the way she had their first night together. "Just go for it," she told herself. Bellamy would make this good for her, and she would make it good for him. That was just what they did in bed.
Excited to show Bellamy her outfit, she pranced downstairs and said, "Alright, Mr. Quarterback, you ready to score?" But he wasn't down there. No response. "Bellamy?" she said, walking over to the sliding door. She looked out onto the beach and saw him standing there, just looking out at the waves.
Oh, please don't be second-guessing this, she thought. If he thought they were rushing, she'd slow the fuck down, but . . . what a disappointment. She just wanted to be with her husband again. To really be with him.
Clarke headed outside, shivering a bit. It probably wasn't really that cold, but when you were hardly wearing anything, it felt a little chilly. "Whatcha doin' out here?" she asked him.
He turned around, and his eyes got wide while his eyebrows shot up. "Whoa. That is . . ."
She did a little twirl, knowing that the dress would fly outward and expose her bare backside for him.
"I'm liking this," he said, looking her up and down.
"I ordered it a couple days ago, had it rush delivered," she told him.
"You spoil me."
"I try." She grabbed hold of his hands, and put them on her waist, waiting for him to really pull her into his arms and start to ravish her. But he didn't. "What's wrong?" she asked.
He glanced away, looking a little unsure, then gazed back down at her and said, "I just wanna make sure you're ready. Because there's no pressure or anything from me."
She couldn't help but laugh a little.
"What?" he said.
"Nothing, it's just . . . you didn't even hesitate when it came to taking my virginity," she reminded him.
"I was seventeen, a walking hormone," he pointed out. "And not an alcoholic."
She frowned. "You're not an alcoholic now."
"Yeah, I am. I always will be."
She felt a pang of sadness in her chest. That was true, she supposed, but she felt bad for him having to live with that knowledge about himself forever.
"I just don't want you to think you have to sleep with me for me to keep getting better," he said.
"I don't think that," she assured him. "You wanna know what I think?"
"Sure."
"I think . . . I think I have to sleep with you, because I'll go crazy if I can't feel your hands all over me," she said.
As if in response, he rubbed her sides.
"And because, the making out's great and all," she went on, "but I got a lot of other parts of my body that need to be kissed."
"Oh, yeah?" His tongue darted out to lick his lips.
"Yeah. And because . . ." She trailed off, feeling like she didn't actually need to get super explicit for him to understand what she was getting at.
"Just say it," he urged her.
She rolled her eyes and sighed. "Fine, I wanna feel you inside me. It's been so long." She could have used a lot dirtier vocabulary than that, but they were going for a bit of a romance vibe tonight, so 'feel-you-inside-me' was fine. "Does that convince you that I'm ready?" she asked, tilting her head to the side flirtatiously.
"I'm gonna be honest, the outfit alone convinced me," he said, pulling her in close so he could give her a huge kiss. "Let's go." Grabbing her hand, he pulled her along with him back towards the house, but when they got to the door, he stopped and said, "Oh, wait a minute, should I carry you, bridal style? You are still my bride."
"Ooh, yes, please," she said, squealing a bit when he swooped her up off her feet and into his arms. He managed to get the door open without letting her slip in the slightest, and she reached back to slide it shut for him. "Don't trip," she told him as he approached the stairs.
"Don't worry," he assured her, taking one step at a time, "I'm an expert at this." As he neared the top, he tripped and fell forward, just barely managing to keep his balance. "Oh, Jesus," he swore, somehow holding onto her. "You okay?"
"Yeah." She had to laugh. "Expert, huh?"
"Well . . ." He shrugged and brought her into the bedroom, remarking, "Oh, the candles."
"Yep." It looked nice in there if she did say so herself.
He set her down on the side of the bed, took a step back, and just looked down at her with unabashed lust in his eyes.
"What else are you an expert at?" she asked him teasingly.
He took his shirt off and tossed it aside. "I'll show you."
"Let me show you first," she said, reaching up to undo his jeans. She couldn't help but notice that his crotch was right at eye level for her, so it would have been a shame if she didn't do anything about that.
It took some assistance from him, but gradually, they got his pants and boxer briefs down to his knees, and that was far enough. All she wanted to do was grab hold of that cock and start pumping it. He hardened in her hand in almost no time, and his eyes remained fixed on her as she jerked his penis slowly. She stroked him until there was enough pre-cum gathered at the tip to spread it around a bit, and that made him groan. Even though there was no direct stimulation in this for her, it always made her feel incredibly aroused to watch his face contort with pleasure whenever she applied a little more pressure or did something to produce a new sensation for him.
Of course, there was no way she was going to have her husband's cock in her face and not suck on it, so when he had his eyes closed, she slid her hand all the way down to the base, leaned forward, and took him into her mouth. He immediately let out a few ragged breaths, and she swore she felt his cock stiffen even more.
Moving her mouth and hand together, back and forth, she lathered him up with her saliva, trying to take in more of him with every bob of her head. He hit the back of her throat, almost triggering her gag reflex, so she had to pull back a bit. Didn't mean she had to stop pleasuring him, though. Swirling her tongue around the head of it, she tasted the pre-cum that just kept gathering, and judging by the sounds he was making, he liked the feeling of this just about as much as her deep-throating him.
She really wanted to show him how much she appreciated his cock, so she got down off the bed, sat on her knees, and lifted his cock up a bit so she could lick his entire length, all the way from the base to the tip. He said something incomprehensible and just stood there with one hand on his hip, the other in his hair, watching her go to work on him. She knew he wasn't opposed to having his balls teased, too, so she eventually decided to suck one of those into her mouth. His hips jolted forward on their own accord, and she actually struggled to hold onto it.
What was ultimately going to get him off, though, was putting his cock back in her mouth, so the next time she licked up to the tip, she opened up wide again and took him in. He continued to let her control the pace and rhythm of the blowjob, although his hips were definitely thrusting a bit. A few times, he reached down and tangled his hand in her hair, but never to hold her still while he fucked her face. He would just give her a gentle push to suck him deeper, but he stopped once she already had most of him in her mouth.
"Is it alright if I cum?" he asked.
Instead of releasing him, she nodded with his cock still in her mouth and said, "Mmm-hmm." If oral sex for him felt anything like it did for her, then he felt a sort of vibration from her response. He closed his eyes, tossed his head back, and breathed heavily as she continued to suck on him. The moment he clenched his eyes, though, she braced herself for an explosion, and a few seconds later, she got one. Some of it went straight down her throat. Some coated her tongue. It was that same hot, salty taste of Bellamy she'd grown so familiar with. She wanted to swallow him down right as it was still squirting out of him, but her mouth was too full; so she had to slide her head back a bit, let it all accumulate there, and then release him before she swallowed. She didn't feel any dribble down her chin, but he noticed some, wiped it up with his finger, and held his finger out for her to lick off.
"Mmm," she moaned when she was confident she'd downed every last drop. "Am I an expert at something, too?"
"Oh, fuck yeah," he said, looking a little bit dazed. "Wow."
It felt so good to make him feel good. That was the thing about having sex with someone you were madly in love with: Their pleasure was your pleasure.
Clearly bearing the same mindset, he said, "Let me return the favor," as she shucked his shoes and clothes all the way off. He reached down to pluck at the shoulder straps of her lingerie and said, "This is hot," before lifting the garment up and off of her. "But this is hotter," he said, practically salivating at the sight of her breasts.
Clarke wasn't sure which part of her body he was about to focus on, but she was sure that anything he did would feel amazing. She moved up towards the headboard and lay down with her head on a pillow, and he crawled on top of her and kissed her. The fact that he had to be tasting himself on her lips was so fucking erotic in and of itself that she felt her stomach muscles shake.
"You're gonna like this," he promised, kissing his way down her cheek to her neck. He didn't linger there long, because he seemed to have a destination in mind as he trailed a line of kisses over her collarbone and down to her chest. Of course he made a pit-stop to kiss and suck on her breasts and swirl his tongue around her nipples, but she knew from the second she felt his fingers slide under the sides of her thong that he intended to go lower. Which she totally welcomed, because what Bellamy was able to do when his mouth was down there was honestly superhuman.
Slowly, he sat up on his knees, grabbed hold of her underwear with both hands, and started to tug downward. She lifted her hips off the bed to help him remove the barely-there piece of fabric, and with ease, he slid it down her legs and threw it back over his shoulder. One of Bellamy's favorite things to do in bed, she'd noticed, was to keep his eyes absolutely locked onto hers while he was undressed her. He got this whole smoldering look on his face that made her feel like she could orgasm right then and there.
Just to be a tease, she played coy at first, keeping her legs together until he pressed his hands against both her knees, spreading her legs apart. "Look at that," he said, totally zoning in on her pussy. Obviously she couldn't see anything, but she knew he was marveling at how wet she already was. Between the blowjob and the brief but effective stimulation he'd just given her breasts, yeah, she was visibly turned on.
Even though she knew he was eventually going to go down on her, he made her wait for it by instead tracing two of his fingers up and down her slit. That didn't last long before he got impatient and inserted both of them inside her. Even just two of Bellamy's fingers could do more for her than almost anything else could.
"Uh . . ." she groaned as he moved them in and out. He twisted his hand so that his palm was up and started making a sort of 'come here' type of motion with his fingers. It was crazy that she was so attuned to his touch that she could feel that specific movement inside of her, but she did. She knew for sure that was what he was doing.
But Bellamy being Bellamy, of course, loved going down on her, so he didn't leave his fingers in for long. He slid down on the bed a bit, pushed her legs even farther apart, and brought his face close to her pussy with his mouth already open, as if ready to devour her. Much to her surprise, he managed to restrain himself at first, just giving her a few teasing licks to the outside. Every little flick of his tongue sent of zap of electricity of her spine, though, until it felt like there were pleasurable little shocks just flowing throughout her entire body. It wasn't long until those flicks became full-on licks, though, like the kind that went all the way from almost her asshole up to her clit. Whenever Bellamy got to her little bundle of nerves, he'd tease it with his tongue, then lower his head and start all over again.
"Oh, god," she gasped, unable to help but squirm around a bit. She kind of wanted to just grab the back of his head and shove it into her pussy, because she knew he'd eat her out so good. But she also loved just letting him take his time, because he knew how to build her up real good. A literal fucking expert.
His next tactic was by far her favorite. When he started to press kisses against her pussy, not unlike the kind he'd apply to her mouth, she just closed her eyes, pressed her head back into the pillow, and moaned. She wasn't even sure why she loved it when he made out with her down there so much, because it wasn't like anything was . . . inserted. He just got so into it. His saliva was getting all over her, and her juices were getting all over his prized beard. It was all messy and spontaneous and oh-so hot.
"That feels so good," she told him, reaching down to tangle one hand in his hair. Suddenly, he pulled back, though, and just blew some hot air right into her center. Her whole body shuddered at the sensation.
"You like that, huh?" he said, doing it again.
"Oh my god." He was definitely on a mission to make her cum, wasn't he?
As if that wasn't enough, he brought his hands and her breasts back in on the action, reaching up to massage them while he began to really eat her out. His fingers kneaded her flesh while his tongue flicked out against her opening. He pressed his whole face forward, like he was on a fucking mission to taste as much of her as he could. Clearly he couldn't get as much of his tongue in there as he had his fingers, but he was persistent and just kept working at it, to the point where she definitely could feel the tip of it going in and out.
"Oh, Bellamy, I'm close," she gasped. "Keep going, I'm close." She took over on one breast for him, gently urging his hand back downward, and he done this to her enough times to know that she wanted him to play with her clit again, too. Once he was doing that and she was touched or licked in all those sensitive areas, it was a done deal. She lifted her hips up a bit as she came, pressing herself hard into his mouth, and he withdrew his tongue and sucked on her pussy hungrily. Bellamy loved tasting her. He'd always been sort of . . . greedy about it. Which was fine with her. She loved watching him lick and lap at her even after she was done cumming, because he didn't want to miss a drop.
When he came crawling back up to hover over her, he smiled down at her, looking satisfied with what he'd just done, and asked, "You wanna keep goin'?"
Was that even a question? "Uh-huh," she replied breathily, still sort of . . . floating. That was what orgasms felt like with Bellamy sometimes, like she was floating.
"Just making sure," he said, sliding off of her a bit, lying on his side.
She turned and faced him, just like she had this morning, and said, "I don't ever wanna stop."
He laughed a little, put his hand on her ass, and gave it a squeeze.
Reaching down, she grabbed hold of his cock again, not surprised to see that going down on her had been enough to give him another erection. It was poised not far from her entrance, and if she moved her hips just a bit or he moved his, it would go right inside her. She hesitated, though, and even stopped stroking him, because . . . they had to stop for a minute.
"What is it?" he asked.
"Nothing." It felt strange to even have to think about protection with him, because they'd gone over a year now without. "It's just, um . . . I started getting my period again while you were gone," she explained. "I'm on the pill right now, but you should probably wear a . . ."
"Yeah," he said. "No, of course."
"They're in the drawer," she told him. Dammit, as much as she would have liked to feel him slide in all natural, they couldn't be irresponsible.
He reached over, pulled open the nightstand drawer, found the box of condoms she'd just went out and purchased today, and said, "Hey, right size and everything."
"Of course." She knew how big his cock was. Still, she knew that, as a guy, he probably hated having to wear one. "Sorry," she said.
"No, it's fine." He tore open the package with his teeth and sheathed himself quickly, but he took the time to make sure it was as snug as it was supposed to be. "There we go," he declared.
"Now you can fuck me," she said, lifting up one leg.
He put his arms around her, pulling her in close again, and asked, "What if I make love to you?"
"Either one's fine." The truth was, even when she and Bellamy went at it kind of hard, they were always technically still making love. Because they were in love.
It wasn't one of their more used positions, lying side to side like this, but it felt pretty intimate, and she liked being able to look him in the eye as his cock probed against her entrance. She hooked one arm under her knee, holding her leg up and spreading herself as wide as possible for him, and he slowly guided himself forward
"Oh . . ." she moaned, reveling in the feel of it as his cock stretched her. No matter how many times they did this, in however many different positions, she could never get over just how perfectly he fit inside her. Almost like they were two puzzle pieces or something, meant to join together.
He eased in about as far as he could go, then started thrusting. The angle of the position meant that his movements were a little more shallow, not exactly hitting at any deep part of her, but feeling the rest of his body—his chest, his stomach, his thighs—rub against hers more than made up for it. With one arm underneath her, he held her close, making her feel like she could just relax into him. She held onto his arms and shoulders, just letting her body fall into a natural rocking rhythm with him.
"I love you," he whispered to her. His words made her feel even better than his body did.
"Love you, too," she whispered back. God, this was so much more than just sex. It wasn't about just feeling him inside her or about working up a sweat and giving each other orgasms. It was about this intangible, powerful, everlasting thing: their connection.
As Bellamy started to roll over a little more onto his back, she took the hint to get on top of him and give him a bit of a rest. He almost slipped out of her, but not quite. Thank God. When she was straddling him, she sank down deeper, surrounding more of his cock. Almost all of it, actually. Feeling him fully made the swirly sensations in her stomach swirl a little harder, a little faster. Even though she wasn't riding him fast, she was riding him well. That look on his face was one of a man trying really hard not to cum before his princess did.
His hands had a tendency to grab at a lot of parts of her when she was on top. He liked to squeeze her boobs, or suck on them if she leaned forward and dangled them in his face. But he also liked to reach around and grab her ass, sometimes even moving her hips up and down for her. But this time, he kept his hands on her legs, letting her have total control as she bounced up and down on top of him. She twisted to the side a bit, reaching back to see if she could give his balls a gentle massage. But he was buried so deep in her that she couldn't get a good grip on anything, so she just turned back around and put her hands on his chest. It helped to have something to push off of when she bounced.
It was all feeling so good that she didn't even mind the condom, barely even noticed it at all. It was still him and her and this and them. It was amazing.
Things got even more amazing when he sat up suddenly, shifting them into one of her favorite positions. Again, she couldn't feel him quite as deep when she was sitting in his lap, but the romance and intimacy of it all was unparalleled. She ground down onto him while he thrust up into her, and every time their hips pressed in close together, she wondered if that might be the moment where she came. Because honestly, she was close all over again. It probably helped that she was still riding the high from her previous orgasm, too.
He wrapped his arms around her and held so close that her breasts just pillowed up against his chest, and he was able to bend his head down and plant some sloppy kisses to her cleavage. She tangled her hands in his hair again, massaging his scalp, and started letting out little moans and sighs to let him know how close she was. Words escaped her at this point, but that was okay. They didn't need any.
When her second orgasm hit, it was a lot less abrupt than the first one. This one was the kind that rose up in her like magma in a volcano, until it just spilled all over. She let out a pleasured cry and clung tightly to him as waves of a sensation she'd never truly be able to explain rolled out from the center of her body to her arms and legs and fingers and toes. She felt it everywhere, to the point where she felt like she might pass out if she didn't just keep holding onto Bellamy. He must have sensed that it was a really intense one for her, because he stopped thrusting as she rode it out, and even when she was done, he just sat there with her for a moment, letting her come down from it as he stroked her now dampened hair and grazed his hand up and down her back.
Now it's my turn to have a hard time catching my breath, she thought, resting her head against the side of his. Good God.
Since his main goal was always to get her off, it didn't surprise Clarke that Bellamy was able to finish pretty quickly himself. He flipped them over so that he was back on top of her, thrust into her a few more times, and that was it. He followed her right into that euphoria with one long, guttural groan right into her ear, and after he was done, he struggled to hold all his weight up on top of her. She wrapped her legs and arms around him, giving him a silent cue to rest on her a bit. He wasn't too heavy. She could take it.
They just lay together for several minutes afterward—or at least it felt like several minutes—and Bellamy stayed inside of her even as he gradually went limp. Either he didn't want to move, or he couldn't. Either way, she liked the feeling of still being joined with him. Puzzle pieces and all.
When he did lift his head back up to look down at her, his dark curls were stuck to the sweat on his forehead, and he had a look of satisfaction on his face that she hadn't seen in months. "We're so good at that," he boasted.
She laughed, in total agreement, and willingly accepted some lazy, happy post-coital kisses from him. The night was definitely still young, so she felt like they could have a little adventure together and figure out just how good they could be.