*A/N - This is a shorter chapter, but I didn't want to wait any longer between updates!
Some of you had eyes like knives because y'all were SHARP on what the problem was. And we're not done exploring it either!
—-
The tracking device leads them on a wild chase through the countryside. Tony stays closer to the ground, while the Quinjet makes wide circles.
"How can he be moving this fast?" Clint huffs, wincing at the pain in his abdomen. He lifts his shirt and the darkening bruise from Steve's shoulder is growing.
"You've seen what his body can do." Natasha snaps. "When he thinks he's in danger he can go on autopilot, push through any pain. He was already unstable, now he's—"
"Dangerous." Bucky's voice cuts through the air.
—
They catch up with him just under 2 hours after his escape.
"On my coordinates" Tony says into the comms. The Quinjet approaches and they descend into a clearing, far enough away for them to approach on foot.
They see him leaning against a brick wall, some dilapidated building that has more bricks on the ground then left standing.
They're just past the trees when a voice calls out. "I can hear you, you know."
They all glance at Bucky who shrugs. They step forward, into the small clearing where the building's foundation rests and form a sort of half circle, blocking his escape unless he decides to barrel through the wall he's leaning against.
Steve's shirt and sweatpants are ripped and torn from crashing through the forest. Small cuts and scratches dot his body and small blood stains from his previous wounds that he's reopened from the exertion make him look like a mangled GI Joe doll.
But his leg is the worst. He's sitting down, and from the middle of his thigh, his leg is angled wrong. As if it's been snapped off and set down next to where it should be.
Bucky chokes and takes an aborted step forward.
"Don't." Steve commands, his voice laced with pain but still menacing.
"Steve, your leg—"
"It's fine." He huffs, shifting and then wincing in pain, "It's just more of your mind games."
"STEVE." Bucky shouts, throwing his hands in the air, "I know you've been through literal hell and back, multiple times, but I need you to believe us. We aren't a product of Beck, we aren't in that damn facility in Montana, and you're not hooked up to the machine. You need to come back to the compound, we just want to make sure that you're safe."
Steve's pupils go to pinpoints and he lets out a vicious growl. Arching his back before slamming his head back onto the wall. The wall cracks and a tremor runs up through the bricks. Then his body. goes slack and he slumps over. Chunks of bricks begin to rain down on him as the others move into action.
Tony jumps forward, blocking the falling debris with his iron man suit as Bucky runs under andslides his hands under Steve's shoulders, lifting it gently. Clint and Bruce each grab a leg, and they haul him out from under the wall and slowly lower him to the ground. Clint looks lost as he tries to set Steve's right leg inline with his body.
They look at their captain, whose breathing is erratic, and face is flushed from physical exertion, but his eyes are rolled into the back of his head.
"We need to get him to medical, he smashed his head pretty good." Tony's eyeline follows Natasha's to the blood splatter on the bricks where Steve had just banged his head.
"Let's move."
They move slowly and try to jostle him as little as possible back to the jet. Mercifully he remains mostly incoherent through the whole ride, only groaning in pain or wheezing.
A gurney is brought and Steve is hauled onto it, being wheeled away through linoleum lined hallways with the minimal medical staff that Tony had called in on their way back to the compound. They stand there, unsure of what to do, until they slowly walk as a group to the waiting room, staying silent the whole time.
—-
"Boss?"
"Yes, Friday?"
"The doctor wants to meet with the group."
Well, that doesn't sound very good. "Tell them we'll meet in the conference room."
"Yes, Boss."
—
"So, you're saying what?"
"He cracked his skull, and lodged the device into the brain tissue. The serum is already trying to heal it, but it seems to be growing around it instead of pushing it out. And with his skull beginning to heal it may get sealed in and become that much more difficult to remove."
They gape at the doctor who stands very calmly, albeit a bit pale, looking at each avenger in the face.
"We need to remove it immediately, but we are requesting you all to be present to keep him calm and let the doctor's know if anything is amiss in his behavior."
"What does that mean?" Bucky asks, but Bruce winces, responding quickly.
"Some brain surgeries are performed while the patient is awake to ensure nothing else gets damaged during the surgery."
Bucky's eyes widen but it's Clint who asks,
"Wouldn't it heal if you did?" His voice is thin.
The doctor makes a half-hearted shrug before taking a deep breath, "I don't know. I assume so, but that would only prolong the healing. His serum will heal everything in time, but with the limited notes I have been provided—" he nods at Tony who nods back. They only ever gave bits and pieces about Steve's blood and serum to medical staff and it is need to know only, "the serum prioritizes healing, so if we don't remove the pieces of the device correctly and we damage another part of his brain, then his body will focus on healing that, over his leg. Which yes—" he raises a hand to ward off Natasha's mouth opening in protest, "will still begin to heal, but femur breaks are an incredibly difficult and taxing process to heal. Captain Rogers is not known for being a very stationary patient."
Bucky huffs at this and they nod in all nod slowly in agreement.
"By my notes, and what I know, everything will heal in time. But we can help that process along."
"If we let it all heal naturally how long will that take?" Tony asks, eyeing the x-rays.
The doctor looks at the notes in front of him, shuffling a few papers. "Truthfully? I have no idea. I've never personally worked with Captain Rogers before. I have no basis to go off of."
"Why is the device getting sucked in, instead of being pushed out? How did they get it to stay in his head in the first place?" Natasha leans forward, her face grim.
"I don't think his body had time to process the need to expel the device before it was being ripped out of his head. It was placed there very recently, and from what I have gleaned, his body has been in significant distress since. You said he wasn't being fed or hydrated or allowed to sleep?"
The group nods stiffly.
"Truthfully I believe the serum was too focused on keeping him alive through those conditions to expel a device that wasn't causing any physical harm or issues at the moment. As to why it's not expelling it now? Could be the femur injury, or any number of things. His body was frozen for 70 years and he came out without a scratch. So I don't pretend to understand anything."
Bucky looks sick to his stomach but just sighs and looks at Tony and then Bruce. "If you both think it's the right choice. You both know the most about the serum."
Tony looks around at the rest of the group. "Scrub up, Doc."
—
They wait until Steve is conscious again before telling him the plan. He looks at them with glassy eyes, and confusion the whole time.
When they ask him if he's alright with the plan he just shrugs, and they spend a whole 20 minutes discussing if that counts as actual consent.
Finally they agree that it will have to count.
—
Tony and Bruce bring in the IV bags of the suped up anesthesia that they've created for Steve.
He's propped up on a weird chair and table hybrid. His leg is casted all the way up to his hip, and the worst cuts and scratches have been cleaned and stitched up.
His head is angled back and the screws into his skull to keep it steady have already been drilled. Bucky watches as tiny drops of blood drip from the holes, a nurse wipes them away.
Steve sits calmly, heavily dosed up to ensure his cooperation and that he doesn't struggle his way out of the surgeon's hands.
The group sits in a semi-circle, facing him.
"Okay, I want you guys to keep up a steady stream of conversation." The doctor orders. "If anything changes, mood, behavior, or anything that seems unusual, let me know."
They all agree and wait for the go ahead.
When they're given the signal, they hear the saw start and Bruce starts talking in calm tones.
"Steve? Can you hear me?"
Steve's eyes move slowly from face to face, until it lands on Bruce's. He 'uh-hmms' and Bruce smiles. "Good that's good. Do you feel any pain?"
He makes a non-committal sound and the surgeon cuts in. "We need vocal answers Captain Rogers. Yes or No, or more if you feel up to it."
Steve swallows thickly and then tries to focus. "N-no."
"Good, good." Bruce says again, changing topics, "Did you know that when I was researching your serum, I collected all of your trading cards?" He laughs, waving off the others incredulous looks, "I even have some that Coulson didn't have."
Steve's brows furrow but he lifts up the corner of his mouth, "you did?"
"Yeah, Steve. I did."
"Well, I bet you didn't know that my dad kept the other shield prototypes that he made for you?" Tony cuts in, leaning back and placing his hands behind his head. "He always wanted them on hand in case you would change your mind about what shield you liked better. And after you went down… Well he couldn't bring himself to throw them away. 11 old ass shields are in one of my storage facilities."
This time Steve's eyebrows raise up and an actual smile crosses his face.
"See 'em?" He murmurs.
"Yeah, Cap. Anytime."
Suddenly Steve winces and groans.
"Sorry," the doctor says, "We're reaching the slivers of the device. It's probably more pressure than pain. Keep talking."
They do, and as the surgery continues, Steve is able to speak more and more, his voice becomes clearer, and eyes less groggy. Bucky takes his turn.
"Steve, what was that thing you always did before we went out on a mission with people other than the commandos?" He asks this question as if he already knows the answer, but it's for the benefit of those around them.
"Buck." Steve says with an annoyed tone.
"Nope, you heard the doctor, you've gotta talk."
Surprisingly, Steve hasn't accused them of being fake since they've hauled him in from the countryside. He hasn't been coherent much, but he seems to be playing along. And he gives a long exaggerated sigh before rolling his eyes.
"Take their names."
"You're gunna have to be more specific for the crowd, Stevie."
Steve scoffs at the nickname but takes a deep breath. His eyes fluttering shut just a bit as he speaks,
"I went around… to each guy who was going on the mission, and took their names down."
"Don't skip details, Steve. You can't, I was there."
Steve's lips purse but he relents.
"I wanted to know the name of the person they would want taken care of if they died."
"Beecaaauuse?" Bucky drawls out.
Steve groans, "Because if they died under my command I was going to make sure I took care of that person." He glares at Bucky, expecting him to argue, when he doesn't he continues, explaining his logic to the group. "It helped me get to know my men better, I knew who they cared about, and it helped them know they could count on me as their captain…" His voice trails off at the end, his face showing a sad and wistful expression.
Bucky shoves his hand out in a wave of disbelief as he looks at the others. "Can you believe that? We kept telling him that that was madness, that he'd never be able to keep all those promises, but he refused to stop, there must have been a dozen of those little notebooks filled with names and addresses. We were just glad—"
Tony shoots to his feet, causing the rest of the group to startle, "notebooks?" He looks a bit wild, thinking hard, "Like, little army green notebooks? Thirteen of them?"
Both Steve and Bucky's eyes train on Tony and they hear Steve's heart rate climb over the monitor.
"Keep him calm, gentleman." The doctor says sternly.
"Sorry, sorry—" Tony huffs out, he slides back into his seat, "Oh geez. Oh GEEZ." He scrubs a hand down his face. When he looks up his eyes are wet and his face pinched, he chokes out a watery laugh and everyone just stares in shock.
"Tony?" Natasha broaches, scooting her chair closer to him.
"Don't worry, Cap. My dad had you covered."
Steve looks genuinely lost, his face uncomprehending, "What— what do you mean?"
Tony looks at him and reaches out, setting a hand on Steve's knee. "I never knew they were yours. My dad— he… would travel a lot you know? And anytime his travels brought him anywhere close to one of those addresses, he would stop in, and—" He stops, his throat catching. "When his advisors asked why he was giving money away he always said, 'I'm not, I'm keeping someone else's promise.' That's it. He never said anything more to them. But when I was 17, I was on a business trip with him, and after they tried to get him to dissolve all those accounts again, and he refused, I decided to ask him why. He looked at me and said, 'I couldn't find him, so I'm helping them.' I remember thinking that was a very cryptic answer, but now I feel like an idiot. I should have known…" Steve's hands are shaking and Bucky looks up to see tears streaming down his face, his mouth trembling as he processes this information. Tony doesn't notice, still speaking towards the ground, his voice raw, "You know… when he died, they tried to get me to cancel the accounts, even though by that time they were basically self-funding through the interest accrual amounts. And as much as I was angry at my dad my whole life, I just couldn't pull the plug, what he said stuck with me all those years…" Tony finally looks up and notices the tears on Steve's face, still falling thick and fast.
"Uh— I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"
"This is real." Steve rasps, screwing his eyes shut.
They freeze, did he just…
"Steve?" Bucky asks, his voice constricts with emotion.
"You." Steve pants, "you're real. I'm really here."
Clint wants to leap with joy but he just settles for grinning and a soft 'whoop'.
"Yes, cap!" He crows, "we're real, you're real, we're here in the compound and you're safe!"
At his last word, the doctor yelps, and Steve gasps in pain, he begins to thrash about, pulling at the screws in his head,
"Hold him!" The doctor shouts, holding his hand against his chest, face contorted in pain. Bucky, Clint, and Bruce are on him in an instant, holding him as best they can. Natasha flies around, trying to hold his head and neck steady. Tony takes one second to step into the suit that was standing sentry mode and joins the fray, holding down Steve's torso and keeping his casted leg from jolting.
"Steve?" He calls out, "Steve, stay with us, something's happening but we need you to stay calm!"
Steve's eyes flash open and he looks about not focusing on any of them, obvious pain crinkling his features,
"Steve?" Bucky tries, "settle down okay? We're going to figure this out, but I need you to stop moving, you're going to hurt yourself."
It takes a minute or two but Steve tires out, panting and wheezing slightly as he falls slack back onto the chair. Blood is seeping through the holes in his skull around the screws.
"Put him out." Bruce commands. "He'll heal when he heals, but something is being triggered,"
"The device," the doctor says, his voice strained, "It shocked me."
"Shocked you?"
"Yes, when you spoke," he points to Clint, "I was removing the largest fragment of the device, and it released quite the shock through the tool and into my hand and arm."
There's a beat of silence when the realization of what that means seeps through.
"Put him under and get it out. Now." Bucky growls, the steel in his tone throwing the room into action. "We'll figure out what happened after Steve's skull is back in place."
They watch as Steve slips under, the drugs taking effect. The happiness of Steve's realization fading into somber silence.
—-
*A/N - It's my absolute head canon and I know many other's that Howard's major character shift happened because he couldn't find Steve and the Valkyrie and bring him home. He distanced himself after that. So I really feel like this is something Howard would have done, because I think he always felt guilt about Steve, especially if he thought Steve could survive.
He could have been a good guy/better dad, but obviously he made poor choices with Tony. Sigh.
This is another reason I want them to continue the What If..? first episode, because with Peggy being the one gone, we could get an entire storyline of Bucky, Howard, and skinny Steve living their lives together and Tony would have an Uncle Bucky and an Uncle Steve and maybe Howard would have been a better dad without the guilt and SIGH I just want to see THAT.