Prologue
All men are not created equal.`
Standing at the top, staring down at concrete that seemed miles away, Izuku felt alone.
He watched the students file out of the school below him as the cold wind stung his face, and wondered what life would be like had he been born with a quirk, like all of them. Born with anything at all.
Born one of the chosen.
Like Katsuki.
A crow perched on the ledge near his feet, and peered up at him quizzically.
His dull gaze met the bird's, and a sudden thought spurred him to dangle one foot above the void.
I wonder what it would be like to fly.
If he had wings, he thought to himself, he would fly down, away from that empty, lonely rooftop. That rooftop where his life seemed so hopeless and bleak that stepping off would surely be a mercy. He looked down at his foot, and at the ground that seemed small and far away, and wondered if he might.
The wind nipped at his neck, and he glanced down at himself. He was still wearing his school uniform.
He swayed back and forth on the ledge, staring at the sky. Now, facing potential death, Izuku felt more alive than he had in a long, long time.
He could jump now, it would be so easy. Few would know, and fewer would miss him.
"Take a dive off the roof, and pray you're born with a quirk in your next life." Katsuki had said, the usual leering grin etched across his angular face.
Hot tears stung Izuku's eyes as he recalled that scornful gaze. There was nothing the blond hated more than weakness and, for all his optimism, Izuku was sure that weakness was all the older boy saw when he looked at him.
Where had it all gone so wrong?.. When had he stopped seeing Katsuki as his big brother, as `Kacchan`? When had `Deku`turned from a playful nickname to a constant reminder of the older boy's disgust? Ever since his quirk failed to manifest, his friend had scorned him. Friend?.. No. Katsuki had never accepted him. Nobody had. He was the anomaly, and perhaps always would be.
Forever the black sheep. His chest felt heavy at the thought.
The crow flew off the ledge in a flurry of black wings, and was gone. He watched it disappear into the blue and, steeling his resolve, he prepared to fly too.
It's okay.
One foot.
I should just stop trying.
"Izuku!"
The recollection of a trembling, tearful voice stopped him cold.
"No matter what, mom will always be there for you!"
The memory struck him like a punch to the gut. Teary eyes, tight hugs, promises. Guilt soon followed.
Mom.
What would she think? What would it do to her? He imagined the knock at her door, the men in blue uniforms and gold badges come to give her the news. To tell her that her son, all she cared for in the world, had been found bloody and broken on the concrete. It would kill her, in more a more horrible way than that 40-foot drop ever would him.
Searing tears pooled in his eyes again at the thought, but this time they were tears of shame at what he had been about to do.
How.. could I be so selfish?
Suddenly the pavement seemed very, very far away, and Izuku's head spun as he looked down.
His legs shook as he backed off the edge, clutching at his chest with trembling hands, the realization of his intentions crashing over him like a wave. Hot tears trickled from the corners of his eyes as choked, hiccuping sobs escaped his throat.
He pressed the back of his sleeve across his eyes and sank down against the ledge trying to catch his breath, his chest suddenly feeling frightfully tight. He sat there for a long while, and eventually his heart slowed it's racing, and his hands their violent shaking; it was while longer before he was able to breath normally again.
At last, he slumped back, a sudden feeling of exhaustion overtaking him. Leaning his head gently down, he watched birds circle above him. There would be no flying today, nor any other. Whatever had gotten into him before was gone now.
"Well," He sighed wistfully to the sky, "'guess this means I live." The wind whistled across the vacant rooftop, but offered no response.
He finally got up, making his way to the exit on unstable legs, and his chest began to feel lighter as he gathered his bag. His thoughts began drifting to brighter places, and as the stairwell echoed with the sound of his footsteps, Izuku reprimanded himself for even considering such a foolish course of action.
"And anyway," he smiled weakly as he stepped into the sunlight again, both feet firmly on the ground, "I can't very well go dying before I become the No.1 hero."