Chapter Four
Ranger's fingertips traced along Stephanie's temple and down her jaw, the pad of his thumb swiping across her lower lip. Stephanie's hands went up and rested on his chest. She could feel the hard unforgiving muscles and the steady thrum of his heart.
She was struck by the contrast between them. Everything about her was light in the silly white dress, and everything about him was dark. Ranger was dressed in black. His eyes were dark. His hair was dark. His life was dark. Ranger had lots of secrets. She was mostly an open book.
"Yin and Yang." He whispered absently as he nudged her back into the dressing room and closed the door.
The sound of the lock engaging was as loud as a gunshot and Stephanie jumped a little.
His mouth was mere inches from hers.
"We can't do this. I can't do this." Stephanie whispered. His nearness confused her senses and scrambled her brain.
"Then tell me to stop." His voice wrapped around her like a whisper soft caress.
Instead of saying stop, her hands fisted in his shirt and she pressed up against him. She could feel him hard and hot burning through the material of the dress. The hunger in his eyes was unmistakable and Stephanie bit her bottom lip to keep from begging him to kiss her.
Ranger's eyes were glued to hers. "Tell me no, Stephanie. Tell me to leave."
Her name on his lips and the deep huskiness of his voice went straight to her core, causing desire to burn low and hot as she clenched around nothing. Ranger leaned down and ghosted a feather light kiss across her lips, teasing her, taunting her, testing her will.
The empty ache caused a whimper to escape before Stephanie could stop it. She saw his eyes turn almost black at the soft, needy sound. The space between them was charged like the air right before a violent thunderstorm. Stephanie had no doubt the pent-up need humming between them was any less primal or desperate.
Ranger's head dipped and his lips caught hers once more. The kiss was demanding, and laced with hunger and anger. The fierceness of it startled Stephanie. She could sense the barely restrained fury bubbling just under the surface. It confused her. What did Ranger have to be angry about? He had been the one that pushed her to Morelli. Ranger had told her to repair her relationship, and now he was mad that she did? Ranger had walked out the door without so much as a backward glance. Ranger didn't get to be the one that was mad.
Ranger licked along her bottom lip, drawing it between his teeth, nipping with enough force to make her moan. A growl low in his throat sent tremors through her and she instinctively opened her mouth letting his tongue slip inside, yielding to his dominance. The exploration of his tongue was not gentle as he devoured her, pushing into her, anchoring her against the wall. Stephanie reached up and fisted her hands in his silky hair gripping his head and pulling him closer still. She kissed him back twice as hard, all the frustration and want telegraphed in the way she responded.
He pulled away from her. His cheek resting against the side of her head. She could feel his heart thundering in his chest. The façade of calm and controlled long gone. Her fingers snaked under his t-shirt and over the smooth expanse of his abdomen. His muscles fluttered under her touch as she continued her exploration of his perfect, hard body.
His hands went to the back of her dress, the sound of the zipper sliding down echoed in the room along with her harsh breath.
"Tell me you don't want me. That you don't want this." Ranger's voice growled against her ear.
Stephanie could feel his legendary control slipping with each tentative touch as her hands snaked lower, working his belt undone, and then his zipper.
Ranger braced one hand on the wall behind her and the other wrapped around her throat. His thumb stroked across her, sending shivers through her. She knew he could feel the pounding of her pulse, the submission to his touch. Surely everything she was feeling was telegraphed through the pounding of her heart.
Stephanie freed him from the confines of his cargo pants and stroked his hard length. A shudder wracked his body.
"Say it." The guttural sound of his voice held a note of desperation.
"I can't." She whispered. "Because god help me, I do want you."
Ranger's hands moved to the sleeves of the dress and pulled them from her shoulders. The dress slid down her body pooling at her feet in defeat, leaving her in a white lace strapless bra and barely there lace panties. She heard his sharp intake of breath and felt the cool air wash over her overheated flesh, causing goosebumps as she a suppressed shiver.
"Dios." He muttered.
Ranger pinned her hands above her head, leaning down and kissing and nipping his way along her neck. The feel of his lips felt familiar, she knew from their time together, Ranger liked to kiss everywhere. Stephanie was sure there wasn't a single inch of her body he hadn't explored that night from the tip of her nose to the back of her knees.
His hand slid down her stomach and between her legs. He roughly cupped her through her panties. The warmth of his touch burned through the flimsy scrap of lace. The heel of his hand rubbed across her, sending fire rippling through her. Stephanie ground herself against his palm. The possessiveness alternately thrilled her and terrified her. Desire pooled liquid and hot. She knew he could feel her response, it was impossible to miss as it coated her trembling thighs.
"So fucking perfect." Ranger's voice sounded like a silky purr.
With one vicious yank, she was divested of her panties. His focus and intent clear. His fingers slid into her petal softness, curling inside, brushing against that sweet, aching spot. Stephanie's back arched off the wall, and she sucked in a ragged breath pushing against him, riding his hand, the pressure building, as mewling cries tumbled from her lips. She was close, so close and he'd barely even touched her.
"God, I think you've ruined me for anyone else." Stephanie's hoarse whisper echoed in the tiny space.
"I just gave you what you were missing." The deep purr of his voice vibrated through her.
Ranger's lips found hers and he gave her a long, slow kiss that was so intense she trembled and shook. His fingers made small, lazy circles between her legs, drawing the desperate little sounds from deep in her throat.
"I love the sounds you make. So sexy." The purr of his voice now had a hard edge to it, his control unraveling by the second.
Ranger surged forward and caught her lips in a searing kiss, covering the sounds of her growing need, as he quickened the pace, as his fingers swirled in the perfect dance to drive her to madness. His other hand dropped from her arms and snaked down to her breast, rolling one taut nipple between his thumb and his forefinger.
His head dropped to rest on her shoulder, her name a whispered groan torn from his throat, the sound piercing straight through Stephanie stirring the simmering desire racing through her towards the finish line.
Her legs began to quake, and she knew he could tell she was close. Instinctively he knew just how to touch her, just how to please her to send her straight over the edge. He increased the pressure and the friction, and his mouth dipped to hers once more swallowing her scream as she tumbled over the edge, her body bucking against his hand, as wave after wave washed over her. Stephanie's hands were around his neck, clinging to him as the last tremors ricocheted through her.
His strong body was pressed against hers, pinning her against the wall, the only thing keeping her from collapsing in a boneless heap. She could feel how hard he was as he slipped his hand from between them.
"Please," she breathed into his ear. "Please. I want—I need."
"What babe. Please what?" His soft voice whispered against the crook of her neck.
Stephanie knew she should feel guilty, that she shouldn't want him with every fiber of her being. But it didn't feel like a mistake, it felt like coming home, like he was what she had been missing. She'd met him almost every night in her dreams, and she craved his touch, his smell. What would be the harm in just this one indulgence, before he was gone from her life forever.
"Inside. I need you inside of me."
Her voice was husky, her proper self long ago abandoned for this wanton woman. That's what he did to her. He robbed her of her sanity and sparked life into her at the most primal level. A frustrated sob escaped her lips as she pressed against him, begging.
"Shhh. I know you do." His fingers traced the curve of her neck with a featherlight touch. Yet he made no move to take her. It was clear something was warring within him, holding him back.
"Now!" The frantic whine broke from her throat startling them both.
Ranger's hands were not gentle on her skin as he slid them around to her backside. The callouses scraped against her sensitive flesh as his hands moved to the back of her thighs and hoisted her up, Stephanie's arms were around his neck and her legs around his hips. His throbbing hard length nestled against her entrance. The feel of him bare against her sent fire roaring through her blood.
Stephanie wriggled, teasing him and coating them both with her unmistakable desire. Whatever last vestige of civility or doubt that was holding him back snapped and he surged into her with one thrust. His fingers dug into her hips. Stephanie knew they would leave marks as his pace increased and his need became less controlled, and rougher.
"So good. So perfect. Come on," he urged. "Let yourself go." He punctuated each word with a hard thrust that had Stephanie's head thrown back, eyes closed, lips parted in pure pleasure as her fingers dug into the hard rippling muscles of his back, urging him to give her more. To give all of himself to her.
Ranger's guttural groans fueled her own as the friction and heat between them continued to build to a fevered pitch. Her mind was numb with pleasure, forbidden and hot. The only thing Stephanie could feel was him. His hard body around her and inside of her. Fucked senseless came to mind, as her orgasm danced just around the edges for a long moment and then slammed over her with blinding intensity. Her face was buried in the soft material of his t-shirt, muffling her scream. The masculine smell of him pulsed around her, burning this moment into her brain. When the loneliness came and darkness overtook her, this would be the memory that would bring her comfort.
He came hard, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of her hips as his body shuddered and bucked and he emptied himself deep inside her with a harsh growl. For just that moment, there was no guilt, no broken promises, just the two of them joined together. For one minute everything was perfect. Ranger rested his chin on the top of her head as their breathing slowed and they came down from the crazy, heady high. Stephanie knew words would be too much, yet not enough. Something had changed between them, something profound. Something she couldn't name.
"Babe." Ranger started.
"Not yet," Stephanie whispered. "Let's not talk just yet."
Stephanie didn't' want this beautiful, perfect moment to end. She wanted to hang onto it for just one more minute, and she knew the second he spoke the spell would be broken, and the real world would come crashing in. She wasn't quite ready for that. She was afraid if she opened her mouth, the truth would come out and she would beg him to take her with him. To save her.
"Stephanie dear, are you OK?" Mrs. Raguzzi's voice penetrated Stephanie's hazy brain.
Stephanie felt the sudden tension in Ranger. She couldn't meet his eyes. What was she doing? What had she done? Mrs. Raguzzi's voice yanked her back to the present and embarrassment washed over Stephanie in hot waves. The reality had started to set in and invade the bliss replacing it with regret and uncertainty. His wetness on her thighs a stark reminder of just how dangerously out of control they were.
"I'm fine. I'll be out in a minute." Stephanie managed to choke out, her throat tight with emotion, tears shimmering in her eyes.
"Take your time." Stephanie heard the door click as Mrs. Raguzzi left.
Ranger released her letting her legs drop to the ground, as he slipped out of her. A moment went by as he righted his clothes. The distance between them had already started to build. Stephanie desperately searched his face looking for love, desire, admiration. Something, anything that might provide a clue, but all she could see was his unreadable expression. His mask firmly back in place. Had this just been one last goodbye fuck?
"Tell me Ranger," Stephanie pleaded. "Is there any reason I shouldn't marry Morelli?"
The absurdity of the fact she was standing in the dressing room of the Bride Shoppe surrounded by wedding dresses in nothing but a strapless bra while he was fully dressed was not lost on her. She felt vulnerable and exposed. Her flesh chilled by the sudden loss of his nearness, his heat. Her body was still pulsing and humming, reminding her of what they had just done.
"Do you want to marry Morelli?"
Stephanie opened her mouth and closed it. She didn't really know what to say. Did she? No one had ever asked her that question, everyone had just assumed the answer was yes.
Ranger studied her for a minute and she held her breath, waiting or maybe it was hoping. Before she blew up her life, she needed a sign. Something, anything really that indicated he had feelings beyond lust. What she wanted was Ranger, but Ranger wasn't on the menu. Was he? The sudden aloofness would suggest he wasn't. It was eerily familiar to the morning after when he'd raced out of her apartment so fast, he'd been a black blur.
Finally, Ranger leaned in and kissed the side of her head.
"Be happy, babe."
With that he turned and left, and the world came crashing down. Stephanie stared after him wondering if it had all been in her mind, until her knees gave way and she slid down the wall to the floor. Hot tears spilling down her cheeks. Be happy? How as she supposed to do that without him?
Ranger got in the Porsche and forced himself to calm down. What had he been thinking? He'd seen Stephanie's tracker at the Bride Shoppe, and suddenly he'd found himself in the dressing room staring at her. No real recollection of how he'd even gotten there. No plan, no nothing. He wasn't sure what he thought was going to happen. Was she just going to take one look at him and throw her life with Morelli away, all that history? For what, to be with him? The guy that had pushed her back to the cop and told her he didn't do emotional and marriage wasn't in his life plan. He vaguely wondered when that had changed, because he was pretty sure the no emotional attachment thing was long gone if his racing heart and sweaty palms were any indication.
Ranger blew out a harsh breath. He wasn't usually quite this stupid, except when it came to Stephanie. He'd broken every single rule for her, including the no attachment one that he prided himself on. Ranger gave a humorless laugh. So, that's what it felt like. He'd never understood the tears and the begging, the making a complete fool of yourself for someone that didn't love you. Well now he did, and Karma was definitely a bitch, and she was doubled over laughing at his stupid ass. Ranger owed some pretty fine women an apology.
At least it had answered one question. He didn't much like the answer, but he couldn't really argue with it. When he'd asked her if she wanted to marry Morelli, she couldn't tell him no. Sure, things had gotten way out of hand and they had both crossed a bright red line, but when push came to shove, he was good for a pity fuck and that was about it. One last romp for old time's sake. Ranger wasn't sure why that surprised him. That's all he'd been good for his whole life. Fucking or killing. Maybe he should learn to stick with what he was equipped to do, and leave the rest of it where it belonged.
The dull ache in his chest was unfamiliar, but he was pretty sure it was heart break. He'd take being tortured over this any day of the week. Tortured he knew how to manage. He knew how to control his pain response, but this was a beast he had never felt before, and he had no idea how to manage it. Let alone get over it.
Ranger put the car in gear and drove off, wondering how his life had gotten so out of control. His fingers gripped the wheel as he fought for calm. How was he going to stop this spiral he was in? His emotions were swirling like a tornado targeting everything in its path. He snapped at Tank, he'd been rough and punishing with Stephanie. Maybe it was time to pull up stakes and get out of Trenton for a while. The sights, the sounds, and the women in Miami would go a long way in salving his wounded ego he told himself. The little voice in his head just snickered, like it couldn't believe he was quite so delusional. Ranger pressed harder on the gas in a futile attempt to outrun the demons that were chasing him, threatening to destroy his orderly life. He would do what he always did. Work the problem, and if that failed, ignore and override. It had worked so far. It had taken him through multiple tours of duty and clawing his way off the streets and up the food chain. It would work again. It had to.