Suspension Bridge

The soft rattling of the train kept my mind swinging between waking and dozing until I wasn't quite sure whether I had entered a gold colored dream or simply saw the reflection of the sun in the window opposite to me. The subtle rustling of clothes beside me seemed like deep space probes trying to seek me out in the depth of my trance. I yawned louder than intended and rubbed my eyes.

Adachi sat next to me still, trying to quietly check her phone. From the vague reflection in the window I could tell her expression had turned pensive. Perhaps she was contacted by someone from work. Could have been someone sending a courtesy 'Get well!' message. Or something more unpleasant. Now that I thought about it a bit more deeply, Adachi had not touched her phone since the call in the morning. Her eyes had been pointed straight forward… or at me.

"Phew."

I leaned my head against the backrest and pretended to be reading an ad hanging above us. My mind that seemed so mushy right now was circling around certain key events from today and gave me mixed signals. If my usual interactions were a strict red light/green light deal, then hanging out with Adachi suddenly turned a one-way street into chaotic inner city traffic with all its winding narrow roads, side-exits and confusing sign placements. Admittedly this came from someone without a driver's license, so it may have been way off as far as analogies went.

We made progress, right? I was nearly sure of that. At the very least I learned that Adachi cared enough about me to get into trouble over it. That was… flattering? Definitely. But at the same time I couldn't shake some sense of unease that accompanied this feeling. What happened at the mall with Hino was a completely different sensation. An emotion that I didn't expect to be directed my way at all. Jealousy.

It had to be that. There was no way the stoic Adachi I knew would suddenly start growling at strangers like an overprotective dog otherwise. Hino was too small to be a threat to anyone, although her family was a big deal. And I mean massive, at least for our city. Adachi's rejecting aura would have been very challenging towards anyone that wasn't Hino actually. Thankfully she was a very go-with-the-flow kind of girl, so she wouldn't make a fuss if someone gave her the stink eye. I still felt like apologizing to her anyway. Just why was that? Had I become Adachi's guardian?

'Excuse my daughter please, she isn't good with strangers!'

"Shimamura?" Adachi looked at me with furrowed brows when I randomly snorted at my own imagination.

"I think our stop is next." I pointed at the screen to our left that displayed the railway nodes and incoming stations.

Our long sick day came to an end. I've never felt better, though.

As we left the station and walked towards the bike stands I held my bangs in the incoming breeze that shook my long hair around. There were a couple of clouds at the horizon. Maybe it would rain tonight. All the more reason for me to hurry home.

"Shimamura, can I… call you later?" Adachi's almost timid request surprised me. She had just unlocked her bike and wasn't looking in my direction at all. The stiffness of her shoulders didn't elude me either.

"Sure." I tilted my head softly to the side. Our agreement from the arcade came to mind immediately. That's right, we decided to keep in touch more directly from now on. I never really had anybody call me for no reason like that since elementary school. Back then Tarumi would often call our family phone and talk to me about random things. Or was it me who called her? It was getting harder to remember…

Honestly, what a weird thing to do right after we spent all day together. If she wanted to tell me something she could have done it the last dozen hours surely. Even so, it made me feel strangely elated. Was this the sway of a promise between friends? A mysterious concept.

"Hear you later then~" I waved Adachi goodbye from the parking lot's exit and made my way down the street to my somewhat distant home. This time I made sure not to give Adachi a chance to offer me a ride. She had done enough for me today.

"Shimamura!" This time her voice was a lot louder, as if she had accidentally moved the volume slider on her speakers. I turned my head back halfway, fully expecting her to try offering me her backseat anyway. "Today… today was really fun!"

That earnest expression filled with a hint of anxiety was so colorful and lively, I couldn't help but stare. Like watching the cherry blossoms of blooming cherry trees swirl in the summer breeze. Adachi had gained that kind of attention grabbing presence to me.

"Are you going to report that to me every time we have a date?" I laughed wholeheartedly.

Adachi's reddened face stuck with me all the way home.

"You are late, Sis." My little sister greeted me thusly at the door.

"I guess?" Did she have to give me such an accusing look, though?

I pushed myself inside with a yawn and pulled off my shoes in record time. It was shocking even to me how tired I felt. It wasn't the usual fatigue that work drilled into my very cells, but rather a fulfilling exhaustion. That was why I dropped dead on my bed right away with a cozy feeling.

"Did something good happen?" Of course this was our shared room, so my sister was giving me even more suspicious looks right away.

"I guess." I smiled softly into my pillow.

"Is that all you can say now?" She squinted her sharp eyes.

"Oh right… I got you a souvenir." I pushed myself up and pulled up a paper bag.

"Doughnuts!" Her face lit up instantly and she took the treats out of my hand. Still the same old sweet tooth. "But I already had dinner, so I can't eat both." She muttered with a hint of self-derision. Seems she had reached that age after all. Maybe mom had performed the same stunt on her hips that she loved to do with mine. Either way she handed me back the last remaining doughnut in the bag.

It was one with orange glazing that would have fit better into a Halloween sale. Staring at it for a while triggered a question inside my fading mind. Why did I buy four doughnuts anyway? I never expected my little sister to eat both, so who was the fourth person?

"Whatever." I yawned loudly and put the bag next to my pillow. Deep down I knew that this last person would appreciate it.

My comfortable sleep was eventually interrupted by my ringing phone and I was dragged into a half-asleep conversation with Adachi just as we had promised. I definitely couldn't remember any details the next morning.

A few days had passed in which I had to bear the judgmental eyes of my co-workers, but all in all things went pretty smoothly. As I explained before, I was not nearly relevant enough that anybody would care about my absence for long. I was not the type to get bothered by it either, so the universe was in balance.

From what little Adachi was willing to share about her own workplace, it seemed like everything had resolved itself without greater repercussions on her end too. Then again, would she tell me if she was in trouble? The fact that I could not get a clear answer to that question is what really bothered me the most.

As I listlessly hammered my keyboard with my fingers in some semblance of cohesion, I realized that I may not have been completely off the hook just yet. There was a pair of eyes on me. For a moment I wondered if it was one of the gossiping crew from next door, but when I casually moved my eyes across the room I found out this wasn't the case. My observer was of the male variety and far from shy about his staring. The moment he noticed my awareness he furrowed his brows and kept sipping on his coffee mug.

Creepy.

Trying to pretend I hadn't noticed was impossible now, but I absolutely didn't want to acknowledge that we ever made eye-contact. When people stare at you from a distance at the workplace it usually didn't have a positive connotation.

I heard a chair creak a distance away and my ears perked up when steps came my way. Oh no.

"Hey Shimamura." He called me and stopped in front of my desk, still holding his mug. He sure was acting casual. Not like I was much different.

"Are you the new intern? Sorry, I've not been working here for that long either. If you have questions, you should ask someone else." I said without a hint of irony and kept tapping away at random keys to seem busy.

"What? I've been working here for five years! We were introduced to each other when you started Shimamura."

So he worked here as long as Adachi had been doing her job then. What a coincidence.

"Ah." I honestly had no idea who he was. Neither his face nor his voice rang any bells. Had we really talked before? His face was so generic that I would probably forget it in ten minutes tops. Considering that he sat at the desk one row diagonally across mine, maybe I should have seen him before. Not that I remembered anybody's face at this company.

There was no way I could remember his name, so let's just call him… Taro. His haircut reminded me a bit of Momotaro and he had that generic quality about him.

"As loopy as ever, huh?" Taro made a pretty cruel remark and then sipped on his coffee. "Did something good happen to you?"

"Excuse me?" Among the top ten topics that I did not expect to hear out of a colleagues mouth, this would make it pretty high.

"I was just wondering. You started smiling more lately." He pointed his mug at me in what I could only assume was an accusation. But what kind of judge would even care about such a case? In the first place, the guy who kept staring at me enough to tell such a difference probably needed to be reported instead.

"I didn't realize." I replied with forced countenance. The creep factor aside, if what he said was true, then I would be quite surprised myself. I didn't have any reason to smile once I entered this suffocating building. Could my mouth really have done such things without my own input?

"Usually you have this dead fish look on your face, so it's kinda weirding me out." Another uncalled for comment from the number one blandest guy in the office. Did he come over just to start a fight?

"Maybe I should call HR after all…"

"Don't act like you care. Not after all the messed up reports you sent me over the months. In my old department we called people like you sleepwalkers." He said with a disapproving grunt. "I used to be like that too actually."

So this was all just an excuse for him to sate his curiosity? Nah, he was probably just killing time. That part about my reports was probably accurate, though.

"What happened with you then?"

"Cardio, mostly." He said proudly and gave me his first bland smile. I wanted to scoff, but somehow turned it into a fake cough. "You don't have to share if you don't want to. Just wondered what changed you. Got yourself a boyfriend?"

"I am flattered, but…"

"I am not hitting on you. Don't flatter yourself." He said dead serious. Ouch.

"I don't have a boyfriend, alright?" I dismissed his inquisitive gaze and hit my mouse to open some files. "Why would that be the first conclusion…?" I muttered to myself.

"Looking at your phone fondly during work hours, giggling with glee and smiling randomly when staring out the window, aren't those all actions of a maiden in love?" Taro shrugged.

This guy seriously read too many romance novels or something. I wouldn't be caught doing something like that in reality. Obviously not. I was starting to think that this was a prank the ladies from the break room set Taro up to. There was just no telling what they were capable of to steer my mind towards romance again.

"I don't have any interest in romance." I stressed my words heavily.

"Hah, okay then. I just couldn't imagine the type of guy who would pick you." He laughed dryly into his coffee mug and turned around.

Did he seriously just come over to mock me? Let off some steam during a stressful day? If his face wasn't so forgettable I may have held a grudge.

I exhaled and ignored the files I opened. Almost naturally I slipped out my phone and stared at the chat history again. My last message to Adachi was still marked as unread. My mouth twisted in slight disappointment, even though I knew that she never replied during work hours. Can't blame me for checking, though.

Ding.

Shockingly just as I was about to put my phone away again, I received a message. I almost wanted to downplay it and set my expectations low. Maybe it was some service informing me of a new update.

It's big.

That was Adachi's quick response to a picture I had sent her this morning. It was such an Adachi response that I had to chuckle. Who would describe a flower as big? I had taken the picture because the lily had bloomed at such an odd time of year, but just what was big about it? It was such a weird way to perceive the world!

I looked out the window to try and find the lily inside the flowerbed near the company entrance again. Maybe it would have been easier to just pluck it and give it to Adachi directly. Then she could see it was quite small and pretty. Wait, was that flowerbed private property? My eyes glazed over as I kept getting distracted by such silly thoughts.

The sound of someone snorting a few desks over snapped me out of it. I could tell that Taro was staring at me again for a moment. Why did I feel like I just lost?

Ding.

Another message caught me off-guard yet again. This time it wasn't from Adachi.

It was from Hino.

The Hino family mansion was quite sizeable, although only in the horizontal. It basically only had one floor, but it stretched through a large property that included a genuine bamboo forest and stone garden. This secluded place was truly idyllic in the same way that a masterful painting would have been. In other words it was nice to look at, but I didn't exactly feel like it was real.

I had been here maybe twice or thrice before, so I at least found the entrance myself. Hino had invited me for the weekend, although I only planned to stay for one day. Packing for a sleepover was a pain in the butt that I didn't need in my life anymore. My mother was only going to come to weird conclusions if she saw me leave home with a full trolley. Even if I told her that I wasn't going to Adachi's place, she would probably not have believed me. It shouldn't matter, but it really irked me, the way she looked at me lately.

Speaking of people looking at me, when I reached the front door it was promptly opened for me and I was greeted by a maid. Yes, a genuine Japanese style maid. As I said, the Hino mansion was that kind of fictional looking place. The maid that greeted me had silky black hair and an unwavering service smile. Her eyes showed a mix of experience and patience that would have put most hotel staff to shame.

If I remembered right her name was Enome?

"Greetings, Miss Shimamura." She slightly bowed her head and let me in.

"Hello." I couldn't quite imitate her polite posture and awkwardly shuffled inside.

"The young lady is waiting inside her room. Let me take you to her. Do you want some refreshments perhaps?"

"That's fine, I'm sure Hino already prepared something."

"Right you are." She nodded with slight disappointment and walked ahead of me.

The corridors were long and winding, akin to a maze, but we reached Hino's room quickly. The sliding door was made from precious wood and had her name plate engraved next to it.

[Akira] it read.

"Your guest has arrived." Enome called out while politely knocking on the door. Hasty footsteps echoed behind the door and suddenly Hino pushed open the sliding door.

"Welcome to my room, Shimama." Hino greeted me with a raised hand, a pose that absolutely did not fit her traditional yukata in the slightest. It was a bit unexpected that she was wearing something so ornate even in her own room, but it couldn't be weirder than seeing her at the shopping mall with it.

"Hi. Sorry for being late, my little sister kept me busy." I casually gave an excuse and let myself in.

"Siblings are a handful. I should know." She crossed her arms and nodded supportively. Not everyone had quite as many siblings as Hino herself. I think she had three brothers. Or maybe four. Considering they were all decades older than her and had families of their own, it was probably hard to connect with them.

"May I prepare anything for you?" Enome asked from the door frame with expectation.

"Enome, I told you I can take care of myself. Why don't you help mother or something?" She was shockingly dismissive. As small as she was, she had the confidence of a giantess.

"Certainly. Please do not hold back on asking for me assistance when you change your mind." She bowed again and closed the door. Such grace, even as she was rejected.

"Every time. Sheesh." Hino sighed and sat down on one of the plentiful cushions on the tatami floor. Her legs were sliding under the table naturally, which was far from the lady-like appearance she should have given off.

My eyes were focused on the closed door for a moment.

I couldn't help but get the impression that this maid wanted to be more involved. It was hard to say what kind of relationship these two had. I was told that Enome had been working for the family basically since Hino was born, so they must have developed some kind of bond for sure. Could two humans who lived together truly keep up the same distance forever? Master and servant or whatever, I couldn't imagine it at all. If I had a maid that lived at our home that was the same age as mom, I'd probably treat her like family down the line. A kind aunt? Well Enome gave me more of a motherly impression, even though Hino obviously already had one.

I sat down on one of the cushions opposite to Hino and checked out her sparsely decorated room. It honestly didn't give me the impression that anybody lived in here permanently. Aside from the shelf filled with books and manga, it was really spartan. Although something else did catch my attention.

"Ah, I forgot about those!" Hino seemed distressed when she found what I had been staring at and hastily rolled over to grab them. "Someone - let's not name names - forgot those here." She said as she stowed the plush animals away in a cupboard.

"Those are cute." Said with a wry smile. It wasn't that embarrassing to have stuffed animals in a girl's room, even if she was more of a young lady. I too had some lying around. I especially fancied the dog types.

"Sure, but she could really get used to cleaning up after herself." Hino complained quietly and then proceeded to pull out a box filled with tea cakes. My eyes glinted as I saw the tea set on the table already producing some weak steam. This was Hino's specialty. I'm not sure if making tea could be a profession, but if it was Hino she would definitely count as a professional. I loved her brews so much that I actually looked forward to this. "Please help yourself."

"Thanks." I took the cup she poured me and drank it carefully. The hot tea soothed my throat and soul. It was no exaggeration to say that this tea was already worth the trip by itself.

"So, Shimamura the office lady?" Hino leaned her cup in her soft hands and grinned.

"Pretty much." Was it that amusing to see me in a suit? I felt a bit embarrassed. Right now I was wearing casual clothes though, so she couldn't make fun of me. I mean, her outfit was way weirder.

"When did you graduate from university? It's like I heard you talk about enrolling just last week."

"Last year. I can't even remember much of it."

"Your grades were always so-so."

"Can't argue with that." I shook my head weakly. Compared to the honor students Hino and Nagafuji I would obviously look weak. I honestly had no idea how I passed university. The final crunch in the last months had probably shaved a few years off my life.

Our conversation already stopped. We just kept sipping tea like we tried to outdo the other. I had expected as much to be honest. 'Catching up' between the two of us could never be that exciting. I was empty and Hino… I didn't know how to approach the topic with her. She didn't go to university even though she was smart, she didn't get a job even though she had skills. I didn't know her circumstances that well, but as the youngest daughter, she basically didn't have any chances of inheriting the family business. Right now the oldest son was taking care of that while her father slowly retired.

"Sorry for not having much to tell. I've been doing some things here and there for my family. It's not a big deal." Hino seemed to be completely aware of her situation and my attempt to be tactful and simply pushed right into the heavy topic.

"How about Nagafuji?" I swerved to the expected direction, one that only earned me a groan from Hino.

"She is making herself useful or so she says." She dismissed it completely and bit into a green tea cake. "Honestly, she hangs out more over here than at the store." There was a sliver of fondness mixed into that exasperation or did I just imagine that?

"This is a really nice house."

"I'd rather stay at Nagafuji's place. It's more comfortable." She retorted.

More comfortable? I only stayed at Nagafuji's place once. It was an apartment right above their butcher shop and it smelled accordingly. I remembered it being cramped in her room even with just us three. Hino's room was small by the mansion's standards, but it was still at least twice as large as Nagafuji's. So these two completely preferred each other's homes as usual. Maybe they had switched families at birth.

I smirked to myself. Having someone over so casually as if it was natural was quite something. I still remembered how nervous I was when Adachi visited my home. And there was no telling if she would ever let me into her apartment. There was no way I would tell her this, but I was painfully curious. Would it be as spartan as Hino's or would it be as messy as Nagafuji's?

"We still have to finish that game we started. That reminds me, your character is still saved on the console." She pointed at me with her little finger.

"Seriously?" I raised a brow. Not that I remembered what game she was even talking about.

"Too bad we never had a 4th player. Would have been more even." She shrugged.

I did remember being pushed and pulled around to team up with each of them, because they were always fighting in the mini-games. Oh. So I still had vague memories of that game after all. Lately my blank slate of a hard drive seemed to randomly regain bits of data. How come?

"Really, too bad that I never got Adachi to talk to me much. Seeing you two get along makes me think we could have hung out together back in school. Does she like games?" Hino naturally slipped into a topic that she had clearly been bursting to get off her chest.

"I'm not sure." I replied hesitantly. I had feared this would happen, but the interrogation was about to begin.

"She seemed so cool and untouchable back then, but look at her now. I thought she would tear my throat out back there." Hino giggled as if she was delighted by that gruesome image.

"She didn't mean anything bad by it. I think." I put a hand to my bangs and pushed them aside nervously. It wasn't fun playing clean-up after Adachi.

"Are you saying she is always like that?" She snorted.

"Of course not!"

Yeah, Adachi was stoic, then awkward, a bit stiff, but I had never pegged her as antagonistic. I knew that wasn't normal. It wasn't. This glimpse of jealousy and possessiveness… I could not explain it. The Adachi I admired who was not affected by anyone was suddenly growling like a wild dog. And that was because of… me? Is that what making a friend was like? Not a casual friend like Hino who I met but may never meet again if events just played out naturally. A tight, suffocating, strong connection.

"Can I be honest with ya, Shimamama?"

How many 'ma's would she keep adding? I put down my cup and nodded neutrally. That aside, usually a sentence that contained the word 'honest' never boded well when it was sent my way.

"I thought you didn't really care about anyone."

"Hm?"

"Sorry sorry, it's just my honest impression. You were hanging out with us, but I never felt like you were really… there." Hino leaned her head on one hand and looked me directly in the eye.

"Hmm, I kinda get it." I muttered and emptied my cup. Reflexively Hino refilled it and as she leaned forward our faces were getting quite close.

"I am glad you made a real friend." She said quietly. Her genuine tone made my heart skip a beat. "But of course we are friends as well! You enjoy my tea properly after all." She pulled back and smirked.

"It's really good." I said honestly. Wouldn't have minded drinking this every day, but I couldn't be that greedy. I'd interfere with their alone time too much.

Just as such a wholesome atmosphere finally managed to settle in, something very loud shook the room completely. It was a yell from the hallway that hit the door.

"Akiraaaaaa~!"

"Oh no." Hino rubbed her face. Before she could act the door was slid open again and revealed the maid Enome. Slung around her shoulder was the arm of another woman, one that I knew as well. Those round glasses, the ample breasts that threatened to burst out of the towel and the incredibly floaty voice. Nagafuji had arrived.

"Your guest has gotten dizzy inside the bath, so I thought to bring her here to rest." Enome said calmly and put the wobbling Nagafuji down.

"Hey, can you tell me why she is even here?" Hino pointed at her childhood friend accusingly.

"She arrived before your other guest and went straight to the baths." Enome explained in a tone that said it didn't have anything to do with her.

"Why didn't you tell me?! You are the one who let her in!"

"Akiraaaaa, you're so smaaall!" Nagafuji hugged Hino's legs from the ground and squirmed like a caterpillar.

"Let go, you oversized sloth!" She tried to break free, but Nagafuji's grip only got more powerful with time. "How many times did I tell you to get out before your head goes mushy? I mean, mushier than it already is." She pushed her friend's squishy cheeks away with both hands, but to no avail.

Meanwhile Enome just smiled in the background like this was her favorite type of entertainment. She winked my way and then put down a few candies. This maid was in her own league as well.

I felt a bit out of place here. Did I intrude? No no, I was the expected guest.

"Enome, peel her off of me- Hey!" But before Hino could order the maid, she already was out the door.

"You said you did not require my services tonight." She gave such a snide goodbye and closed the door.

"You are so warm… I wanna kiss." Nagafuji was a mess and she was apparently intent to crush Hino with her aggressive affection.

"What?! I said get off of me! No kisses and no groping Tae- N-Nagafuji!" She kicked the taller girl off with sheer willpower and then breathed heavily as she adjusted her kimono. "Seriously, you didn't even drink!" Then she glanced my way and coughed a few times in shame.

"Don't mind me." I said jovially and opened one of the candies. They were hard, but tasty.

"Damn it, did you even bring a change of clothes? Keep the towel on!" Hino was close to a nuclear meltdown as she forcefully pulled the towel back up on the other girl. "Shimashi, can you keep this idiot busy for a while? I need to get her some spare clothes. I got a few lying around in the guest room." She made a begging pose and then rushed out the room.

Welp. So much for giving me a say in it.

I looked at Nagafuji who was stretched out on her back and apparently enjoying the cold ground. Then she rolled around a few times, threatening to lose the towel the entire time, and stopped next to me. Her big eyes were mustering me like a curious animal. Eventually something seemed to click.

"Shimamama!"

"Close enough." It seemed those two shared more than just a room. Hino's penchant for nicknames had always rubbed off on Nagafuji. I was actually surprised she remembered me though. It didn't seem like she cared about remembering anyone but Hino and her family.

"You're in Akira's room." She realized.

"Yup." It was definitely impossible to understand that girl's thought processes, so I didn't even try. However, I did take note that she kept referring to Hino's given name. That was actually new to me.

"You. Youuuu. Did you kiss?"

I nearly spat out my tea. Thankfully I didn't, because that would have been a waste. And hard to clean out of tatami mats.

"Nagafuji, are you okay?" I couldn't phrase it differently. Her red face and foggy glasses made me think she was probably stuck in that bath for half a day. Maybe her brain short-circuited.

"Yes! But are you?" Turning the question on me didn't make her seem clever, even if she clearly thought so.

"I'm… fine. You really didn't change much." I chuckled dryly.

"I grew two centimeters!"

What time frame was she even talking about? And which part of her grew… despite not wanting to I kinda kept glancing at that wobbling mountain range below the overstressed green towel. Can you blame me? This had nothing to do with envy or lust, it is simply impolite to ignore something so extraordinary.

Nagafuji was chilling out (quite literally) next to me and we found a weird silence surrounding us. It was awkward, frankly. I just hoped for Hino's swift return.

"Did you kiss?"

"I told you already, we didn't."

"I mean, kissed anyone." Nagafuji cut in.

"Why does it matter to you?" I felt a bit defensive now. Something about that question was very nerve wrecking. Everyone around me seemed so focused on romance, even this weirdo. "Did you-" I stopped my retort mid-sentence. That was a landmine I wouldn't want to step on. Hino and Nagafuji were well… close. Closer than any friends I had ever seen. I had never cared about gossip, but back in school there was definitely a common sentiment that these two were more than friends. Can't say I disagreed.

But I didn't want to know. That was none of my business.

And yet.

Yet something deep inside me called out.

"…do you like Hino that much?"

Nagafuji stared at me from below and her lips formed a confident smile.

"I love Akira the most in the world." There was no ounce of hesitation in her voice.

Love, huh? That word didn't mean the same thing to everyone. The love of siblings, the love between friends and the love of partners, they were all different. How could anybody find the borders between those types of love and how did they settle down?

Nagafuji had been close to Hino since kindergarten. They were genuine childhood friends. Their bond was something I could only find in manga or novels. There was an appeal to that, I couldn't deny it. And with their circumstances, it was definitely suspicious. They were both at a marriable age, they were both pretty and talented. Even my mom got on my case about settling down, so I could only imagine what it was like for them. Yet they didn't ever stray from each other's side.

I… wanted that.

There was no doubt, this moment of clarity showed me the truth behind the folds of my tired soul. Even someone as untethered and impermanent as me desired a connection. Had I already started anchoring to someone? It was hard to deny the obvious.

I knew that there was a level of admiration that swayed me to her back. I knew that there was a protective instinct that drew me to her side. I knew that there was a fondness that connected our hands.

I couldn't say it the same way Nagafuji did. I wasn't sure if these feelings were even the same thing.

"I'm glad." I said with more warmth than even I expected.

"Hehehe, but you can't smooch her." Her stance was more than fortified, but who was she even arguing with? Was this maybe jealousy too?

"Nobody is going to smooch anyone!" Hino banged the door open and threw a pile of pajamas on the struggling Nagafuji. "If you wanna take a bath before dinner, go ahead ShiShi. I got this covered." She gave me a thumbs up as she literally smothered Nagafuji below the clothes.

I didn't intend to end up like Nagafuji, but that was a very alluring proposal. The heat of the hot-spring like baths in this house may have been able to cleanse my spirits. I felt pretty heated already.

As I left I heard numb voices behind me in the room.

"I told you not to go crazy in front of other people, Taeko." Hino scolded her.

"But you were playing with her instead of me!"

"Are you a grade-schooler?!"

Or maybe I was completely wrong about Nagafuji's feelings. I could never quite decide.

We had spent a good while talking and playing around, the three of us, but after dinner I left them behind to return home.

"I know you're busy, but keep in touch." Hino said with a raised smartphone. "And give my regards to Adacchi."

"Adacchi?" Nagafuji tilted her head.

"Will do." Surprisingly I actually meant it. Something had changed. I could not express it, but this visit had really cleared my thoughts.

With a spring in my step I walked through the bamboo forest and scrolled through my phone contacts. Her name appeared almost instantly.

"Evening." Her stable voice reached my ear immediately as if she had been waiting for my call.

"Wanna meet up tomorrow?"

"Uhm, yeah… I'd like that."

I smiled while looking at the night sky. The stars were spread my way in an infinite expanse, but this time I did not feel lost. I had a guiding light that I was fixed to already.

Whatever this feeling was, I would not let go of it.