"Say… where are Natsuki and Monika?"

"Good question, really."

Those were more or less the words that were shared between Sayori and Yuri as they sat by the window of the Literature Clubroom, with their respective Titans mingling about outside all the while. Ronin seemed particularly keen on creating a little tower out of tiny branches that he found laying around, and Ion was helping him gather up various twigs from their surroundings all the while.

How they managed to balance a five metre long branch that was over two inches thick above a tiny twig was beyond either girl's comprehension, though they didn't question it as they watched Ion put the finishing touches on their little twig tower, which was a small flag with Sayori's face on it. Ronin promptly sliced it off at the base before replacing it with one of Yuri, only for Ion to retaliate by shooting it off at the base with her Laser Pod.

An unspoken battle was then waged as the Stryder and Atlas frame battled for whose pilot would obtain ultimate supremacy over the completed twig tower, one that Yuri and Sayori observed with great interest. Why their Titans even had so many flags of their pilots was a mystery that would probably never be solved, though before long, the Vanguard Titan Monarch burst in and ended the fight by placing a flag that had the faces of all four club members, including Anon's boring mug scribbled on near the bottom right corner, at the top.

"Is this acceptable?" inquired Monarch as she motioned towards the flag, to which the other Titans nodded, content with this new agreement, prompting Monika's Titan to release some steam from her vents in relief. As she did so, Scorch waddled over to them before opening up his cockpit hatch. From within, Natsuki waved over at the other Titans, who returned the gesture, before she jumped into the clubroom via its window, ignoring the protests from Yuri and the gushing from Sayori all the while.

"Natsuki! That was dangerous!" scolded Yuri with a frown as she watched her diminutive clubmate jump in, and in response to her words, the midget pouted and crossed her arms whilst Scorch reached into his cockpit and pulled out a box that contained something that was probably sweet.

"Psh, you mean cool, dontcha?" defended Natsuki with a grin as she got the box from Scorch, who flinched a little when he saw his charge straining under the weight of the massive box with an equally massive cake inside of it. He still wondered why and how his pilot could have so much energy, especially due to her malnourishment, but then again, he reckoned that she was at the most energetic point in her life… so it kinda checked out…

"Cool doesn't mean that you should do it, Natsuki!" scolded Yuri once more, with her pouting a little as she crossed her arms beneath her bust, a gesture that riled Natsuki up for the wrong reasons as she positioned her hands on her hips. Both Ronin and Scorch tensed their joints upon seeing this, with each looking prepared to reach into the clubroom to restrain their respective pilots before they did anything rash.

And then… Sayori came to the rescue!

"No! No fighting, both of you!" scolded Sayori as she leapt between the tallest and shortest members of the club, with her looking as though she was an action hero leaping to take a bullet for either one of them for the briefest of seconds… only for that illusion to be ruined when she abruptly landed on the ground. Ion let out a mechanical sound that sounded suspiciously like a gasp as she elbowed her way past the other Titans to get a look at her pilot's state, with her nearly knocking down the twig tower in the process, though she was quick to calm down when she saw that she was fine.

Standing up within a moment's notice as she dusted herself off, Sayori puffed her cheeks up and looked between Yuri and Natsuki with an adorable expression on her face, one that Ion saved in her memory banks as she watched her affirm her status as the Vice-President of the Literature Club and speak out to the others.

"Yuri cares about you, Natsuki! Jumping in through windows is dangerous, and it's a big no-no!" began Sayori, to which Natsuki grumbled to herself. She didn't like to be antagonised by anyone, especially not the sunshine girl that was Sayori, and though it was subtle, Yuri did puff her chest out just a bit as she acknowledged that she may have won this match… only for it to un-puff itself when the bow-wearing girl turned to regard her this time. "And Yuri! You don't have to be so stern with Natsuki! The rule of cool exists for a reason, and if she fell, Scorchy would've been able to catch her!"

As she spoke, Sayori pointed towards the aforementioned Titan, Scorch, with a pout. Her response was a red faced Yuri who silently berated herself for being such a prick at times whilst the Orge Titan scratched the top of his cockpit hatch, unsure of what to make of his new nickname from the Vice-President…

"I… understand…" grumbled Yuri in defeat as she sighed, and likewise, Natsuki pouted as she acknowledged the well-meaning concern of her pal. Sayori brightened up further than this, a sight that was so blindingly positive (to all except one) and adorable that the mood brightened along with her demeanor.

"Well then, let's change the topic to the box! What's in the box?!" demanded Sayori as she swerved up to it, with some drool leaking from the corners of her upturned mouth all the while. The Titans, barring Ion who was honestly used to this by now, all watched on in worry as the bow-wearing girl attempted to rip the box open, though despite her best efforts, she couldn't even dent the cardboard box even a little.

Monarch made an effort to not mention how the thing had reinforced coding to stop her from opening it in the first place. Not that they'd really believe her anyhow.

"Oh quit your yapping, Sayori! It's cake!" assured Natsuki as she marched up to the box and pulled on the ribbon above it. Thereafter, the box split open, allowing the aforementioned cake to be seen, and at that, Sayori, ever the sweet enthusiast, pounced forward, only for Ion, in an impressive display of agility for something as large as she was, to shoot her arm unit outwards, into the club window, and grab her pilot before she could collide with the cake.

"Sayori," chided Ion lightly as Sayori pouted, a gesture that didn't sit too well with the Titan as she booped her pilot on the nose, prompting her to lighten up with a giggle all the while. "We can have cake later, when Monika and Anon have arrived."

"Alright! Say, where are Monika and Anon, anyways?" inquired Sayori, with her placing a finger on her chin as she spoke. Neither Yuri nor Natsuki had an answer to this, and their respective Titans were clueless as well. Monarch, on the other hand…

"Both Monika and Anon are both busy with an assignment that their teacher has given them. Last I recalled, Anon required my pilot's assistance, and she offered it to him," explained Monarch, short and sweet as she held her index digit up in the air. The girls nodded at that statement, with Natsuki snarking about Anon needing help in the first place, only for Yuri to berate her for her rudeness.

"I find it strange that Anon cannot perform his duties on time. Do the teachers in this educational facility not give their students enough time to complete their given tasks?" inquired Ronin thoughtfully as he rubbed the base of his cockpit hatch as though it were his chin.

"They do. Natsuki's teacher once gave her extra time on a single assignment after she failed to pass it in on time," confirmed Scorch, with him 'wincing' a little when he heard his 'little sister' yelling at him indignantly. A part of him wished to inform the other Titans about just why she wasn't able to hand in her work on time, though that wasn't his part to tell…

"In which case, why are our pilots able to hand in their work diligently… for the most part," commented Ronin, with him adding that last part in as an afterthought, earning him a mild bonk over the cockpit from Ion as Scorch wasn't tall enough to do that, before he continued. "But Anon is incapable of doing so?"

"Ion, your pilot holds the most history with Anon. Have you any insight on this?" asked Monarch, who totally didn't know that Anon was just programmed to be this way from the get go. Mediocre all across the board with enough density packed into just his forehead that he could probably recreate the Big Bang if he wanted to.

"Unfortunately I do not. My records regarding Anon have ceased ever since the day Sayori enrolled into this educational facility," apologised Ion. "He seems to have lost interest in remaining her friend, and through recent observational records, it would seem as though he has no intention of making any new friends either."

"So why is he here in the Literature Club, then?" inquired Scorch curiously, with him scratching the top of his cockpit hatch as he spoke. Silence was his primary response as the other Titans pondered this situation, though before long, Ronin, after a comprehensive scan through his memory banks, found a possible answer to their questions.

"I am unsure on if this is a logical answer to our questions, but I recall an excerpt from Yuri's book, the Portrait of Markov, that stated that in order to lure others, namely those of the opposite sex, into a false sense of security, one will tend to act in a way that causes their potential future victims into lowering their guard," commented Ronin in a hushed tone, with his on board OS sounding a lot more dire than it usually was, so much so that the other Titans tensed up at the thought.

"Ronin poses a good point. A similar thing happened in book 492 of Natsuki's Parfait Girls," agreed Scorch, with his OS sounding a lot more protective than usual as he spoke. Ronin himself seemed a little peeved at his pilot's novel being compared to Natsuki's manga, though he saw no reason to dispute an agreeing statement as he nodded, and as he spoke, Ion's singular optic dimmed briefly before lighting back up.

"I have skimmed through the World Wide Web for more information on the situation at hand," added Ion helpfully, only for the other Titans to stare at her in surprise. "Yes?"

"You have access to the World Wide Web despite there being no WiFi?" inquired Scorch, with him sounding as baffled as his OS would let him as his optic widened a little in shock. Ronin and Monarch felt similarly to their Ogre pal, prompting the Atlas to 'chuckle' a little before nodding.

"Sayori stuffed a WiFi point into my cockpit some time ago," explained Ion dismissively as she shrugged. The other Titans seemed to be surprised at first… only to snap out of their initial stupor when they realized that the bow-wearing lass was undoubtedly the type of person to do something as… intriguing as this.

Ion refused to tell them that it was self-installed by herself. She needed the internet to be constantly up at a moment's notice to deal with her pilot's mental state, after all…

"Regardless, what have you found?" inquired Monarch curiously. This wasn't in any of the scripts that were a part of this mod, not that she knew much on it anyways as the modder had barred off most major details from her to avoid spoilers…

"According to these results, there is a fifty, maybe more, percent chance that Anon simply wishes to get closer to these young women out of lust," commented Ion thoughtfully. Ronin and Scorch both tensed up at that statement as the former recalled the stares his pilot tended to get thanks to her above average bust size whilst the latter still had the term 'lolicon' stuck in his systems. It was truly a terrifying thing to think of…

"And the other 50% or less?" inquired Monarch, to which Ion shrugged.

"According to these results, either he just wishes to be friends with them or he wishes for a Harem of sorts," responded Ion simply with a mechanical shrug, to which the others blinked.

"A Harem?" echoed Monarch in apparent confusion as she never recalled hearing that word prior to now outside of a handful of passing comments from Monika in the past. The other Titans seemed amused by how the Titan of the smartest person in the club didn't know what the term Harem meant, prompting Scorch to elaborate to her on it.

"It is a noun, one that describes the act of having more than one lover under your care," explained Scorch, a statement that didn't sit right with Monarch as she raised an optic ridge.

"Does Polyamory not describe that better?" questioned Monarch in confusion, to which Ronin shrugged.

"It is the more commonly used definition in most circles," clarified Ronin helpfully as he recalled spending some of his downtime browsing various websites to look through stories written by reputable people (in his opinion). He originally did this to better understand his pilot's love of books, though inevitably, he too went tumbling into the well that was Fanfiction, and he has not recovered since.

He wasn't going to complain, though. It helped make his downtimes much more interesting, after all.

"Ronin, what circles are you even referring to?" asked Scorch curiously, to which the Stryder shrugged.

"Irrelevant. The point is that, even if Anon turns out to be a good person, which I highly doubt, I would rather not have my pilot fall into a Harem with him," commented Ronin decisively. "And I doubt that any of you would want this either."

"I do not," confirmed Scorch, with him not liking the idea of taking his 'little sister' from him. Oh God, he's really taking this big brother thing rather seriously, now isn't he?

"Seconded," agreed Ion, with her OS still admittedly peeved at Anon having left her pilot alone for as long as he has.

"Eh, thirded," finished Monarch noncommittally. Outside of her being irritated at just how… dense Anon was, something that couldn't be fixed thanks to his code that was so simple that it looped around to being incredibly complicated (according to the modder) the Vanguard really didn't have anything against the guy.

"All in favour of keeping a close eye on Anon from here on out?" offered Scorch critically as he narrowed his singular optic at his fellow Titans and raised an arm unit up in a sort of salute, to which two of the three raised their own arm units up.

"Aye," said both Ion and Ronin as they found this to be the most logical way to keep their pilots safe. Even if it turned out to be a useless endeavour, Protocol 3 dictated that they carried this out. Monarch simply shrugged and raised her hand noncommittally as she knew that Anon, even if his coding were better, was not smart enough to do anything like what the other Titans were worrying over.

But she kept her OS' metaphorical lips sealed on that matter. It was just too amusing, watching her fellow Titans getting riled up over essentially nothing.

"Ion, Scorch, Ronin, Monarch! What are you guys doing? Club's about to start!" protested Sayori rather abruptly, in turn snapping the Titans out of their brief conversation as she spoke. Widening their optics a little as they turned towards her, the four watched as the cutie leaned out of the window, a sight that made Ion lurch forwards and hold her manipulators beneath her pilot as a precaution.

"Sayori! Please refrain from endangering yourself!" chided Ion gently as she waved the digits on her free hand around in a scolding manner. Sayori herself pouted as she looked away from her Titan with a somewhat apologetic expression, only to smile yet again and lean back into the clubroom.

"Sorry! But besides the point! Anon and Monika are here!" announced Sayori with a bright smile, one that nearly blinded the optics of all Titans present as Ronin's more sensitive rectangular optic shrunk down at the intense glare of the girl's smile. How Ion could even handle this cutie on a daily basis was beyond everyone's understanding…

"Understood, Sayori. Let us commence with Protocol 2: Uphold the Mission," commented Ion with an invisible smile as the other Titans stepped towards the windows of the clubroom, with Scorch waving at Monika as she entered the place. The red haired girl mirrored the gesture without much issue as she smiled at the Titan, though within a second, the good natured demeanor of the Titans disappeared when they noticed Anon step in.

Well, all of them but Monarch, anyways…

"Erm… sup, everyone?" greeted Anon with a wave as he entered the clubroom, only to be met with the intense glares of the Atlas, Stryder and Ogre class Titans. Monarch didn't respond outside of a noncommittal wave, leaving the poor protagonist to deal with the constant surveillance of her fellow Titans.

Monika took note of the sudden change in attitude from the other Titans, however, prompting her to give her own a look that more or less said are they serious?

The nod from her Titan's head camera was enough of an answer, and at that, the redhead couldn't help but snicker a little, prompting Sayori to perk up a little.

"What's so funny, Monika? Did Anon tell you a joke that you just got?" asked Sayori curiously, only for Monika to wave her off.

"Oh, nothing. It's just that I believe that things will be very… interesting for Anon from here on out…"

"Huh…"

Whether or not Sayori knew what her friend meant was probably a question best left for another time…

Been a while, yes? I decided to stop doing long outros for these 'joke stories' just to save me some time. I hope you guys don't mind.